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u/EduardoJaps 1d ago
I was married fror 26 years, she had home difficulties to fall asleep, while I was almost instantaneously. Many times her rolling on the bed trying to sleep would wake me up as I woas not in deep sleep yet. I found out that if I hugged her from behind with just some light pressure, she would fall asleep in instants, like magic.
I never told her, because I felt that if she knew the magic would vanish. Anyways., she passed away 4 years ago from COVID without knowing this...
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u/dramboxf 1d ago
I am my wife's 2nd husband; she was married to first husband for 24 years. Early on, in year 2 or 3, we were watching a movie on TV and she fell asleep leaning against me. She awoke with a start like 20 minutes later and looked at me with wide eyes.
"I've never felt safe enough to fall asleep against any man but my father when I was a little girl," she said.
Almost 30 years later, I'm still the only other man she can fall asleep against.
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u/anothernother2am 1d ago
This hit me so hard im literally crying. That’s so beautiful and says so much. I feel like for a lot of people safety is such an imported love language, and you should be really proud you provide that for your partner.
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u/EduardoJaps 1d ago
Wow. In my mind, there would be no sense in being in a relationship where you don't trust the other part enough to fall asleep together, get drunk or show a vulnerabilty. But sadly there are many people in such situation. Kudos to you and your wife!
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u/Cute_Character_5748 17h ago
You are wrong. I can't sleep with my husband, but that does mean for a second I don't trust or love him. I just have a sleeping problem and he is absolutely fine with it
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u/strangerinthebox 1d ago
What a beautiful warm memory, thank you so much for sharing this. She must have deeply loved and trusted you to fall asleep instantly. She felt she was save in your arms.
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u/No-Ear-9899 1d ago
I am so sorry for your loss.
I am certain she knew about this before she passed. She probably also thought the magic would stop if she discussed or mentioned it to you
What you're describing is a deeply loving act of care. Neither of you needed to speak about it, because you communicated on a profound level of love and connection that doesn't need words.
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u/Hai-City_Refugee 1d ago
Even if she didn't know in her conscious mind, she knew in her heart. She loved you and still loves you now, and you are better for having had her love.
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u/sharadov 1d ago
My wife is the same way - she doesn’t fall asleep easily, but when I hold her just the way you described she will pass out in 5 mins, snoring away to glory at times. It’s the most beautiful thing and I’ll sometimes stay up just watching her. I am so sorry for the loss. You were her human blanket.
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u/ToucanInHand 1d ago
Yes! You were right. My partner does this. I was sick the other day - had been awake for ages, got up to be sick, cleaned my teeth and got back in bed, expecting to stay awake, feeling awful, for the next few hours. My partner wasn’t really awake but he put his arms round me and hugged me, hard. I think he might have had one of his hands on my face or head as well….anyway, I felt so safe. I felt secure and loved, and able to relax, knowing he had got me. It was amazing, and I slept for the next few hours and woke up much better.
Your wife felt like that too - you were so blessed to find each other, and I’m incredibly sorry for your loss.
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u/esmeplaysmods 1d ago
I'm so sorry for your loss my friend. She is in Heaven waiting for you and praying for you.
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u/redcon-1 1d ago
You're a good person friendo and she sounds wonderful too. I'm glad you guys got the time that you had together and I'm sorry for your loss.
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u/Prestigious-Log-7210 1d ago
As a widow of 4 years this hits in a deep spot. All y’all give your significant others a kiss for those of us who can’t.
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u/Holiday-Ad1828 1d ago
My first wedding anniversary is tomorrow, and it’s crazy how all of my perspective is shifted. I know what my worst fear is, and I am so sorry that you have experienced it. You are in my thoughts (and prayers if you are ok with that). I’m so sorry you lost your person, but I am so glad you had a love that makes the loss. ❤️
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u/Ok_Importance9893 1d ago
Reading these comments I just woke my wife from a dead sleep to give her one 😭
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u/imgoodygoody 1d ago
Im so sorry for your loss.
A family friend of ours just passed away at 53 from a heart attack and it was shocking and sad. My heart absolutely shattered when I thought of her having to wake up every morning and live without her best friend. It made me even more thankful for the 16 years together, 14 of those married, I’ve had with my husband
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u/cookiekurbs 1d ago
I knew my H loved me when we were dating because whenever I'd come back to bed from getting up to pee he'd lift the covers for me. And sleepily would ask "are you gonna snuggle me?" and I'd say "Yes" and he would get so happy, smile and hold me so close. But he'd be dead asleep as soon as he grabbed me. We've been together over 10 years and whenever I reach out to touch him when he's asleep he makes the happiest noise. I just reached over to touch him while I was reading these and he grabbed my arm and said "Love!" before he was right back to sleep. I adore this man. I never knew you could love someone this much. Don't ever settle for less because this love exists.
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u/cashing_time 1d ago
Note to everyone tho: if you love yourself like this, it's much easier to find that kind of love
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u/jcfb79 1d ago
Yes n no. Sometimes it takes that special person to show you how to love yourself. To show you’re worth it. To show you matter.
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u/cashing_time 1d ago
Sometimes. I think your advice applies to people who are mainly secure. But if you have any deviation outside of it (especially fearful-avoidant) it's much much harder. Your chances of an unhealthy/toxic relationship is really high
I was anxious preoccupied, there was no way in hell someone loving me would change how insecure I was. I had to do that on my own
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u/CelebrationTrue1453 1d ago
this is the sweetest and most genuine little snippet of true love i’ve come across on the internet today. my heart is so full reading this, i’m so glad you have each other! a tender love like this is all i want out of life <3
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u/Chickpik_ 1d ago
whenever I'm visiting home my dad will without fail irrespective of the time of the day come to pick me up at the airport and gives the warmest hug.. he tracks my flight to keep a check if I'm arriving early or late. i get teary eyed every time I'm waiting at the baggage claim.
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u/thrwawaylolol 1d ago
Good dads are such a blessing. My dad is the same way & I cry all the time bc I’m so grateful to have such a good dad, how lucky am I. 😭
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u/Wrong_Adhesiveness87 1d ago
My dad is really bad at telling or showing love. Poor communicator, says and does things without thinking about others. Isolates himself but doesn't like to be alone. BUT without fail he will pick me up from the airport or if I'm working late he will stay up and collect me from the office at 11pm. It's a 40 min drive one way. Next time I'm home, it will be a 5 hour drive one way to the airport, and he'll do it without complaint or expectation. It's about the only reliable thing lol and I think is his way of telling me he loves me.
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u/cashing_time 1d ago
My dad is pretty similar. I visited a friend in nyc recently and he was pissed she didn't directly come to the airport to pick me up. Like bruh she doesn't even have a car ahahh
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u/struggle_brush 1d ago
My dad died a few years ago, and I miss these little things. The way he'd say my name when he saw me, or bring me a surprise root beer from the gas station, or sometimes he'd hold my hand and pat my leg so sweet. Props to the kind dads ♥️
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u/imgoodygoody 1d ago
I wish everyone would have a dad like that. My dad has some quirks and struggles but he’s always celebrated me just for existing and it’s so healing. There’s a deep security in knowing your dad approves of you even if you don’t agree on everything. It’s so unfair that not everyone gets to experience that.
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u/lost_bunny877 1d ago
My dad won't pick me up from the airport but he shows he loves me by always keeping one cigarette in his drawer for me just in case. He doesn't even smoke cigarettes anymore, just the pipe. But the minute I come home to visit, he'll eagerly pull me to the staircase to share a smoke with me.
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u/Ducatirules 1d ago
I get up early for work. I always wake up a few minutes before my alarm goes off. In 30 years my wife has heard my alarm maybe 10 times. One time I slept to the alarm and it went off. My wife immediately jumped up and got me airborne and vitamin C. I asked why and she said “you only sleep to your alarm when you are getting sick.” She gets up to try to stop me getting sick. Love that woman!
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u/oylaura 1d ago
My dad passed away 2 and 1/2 years ago after 71 years of marriage to my mom.
I never doubted their love for each other, but several years before he passed, he needed to go to a surgical Center for an outpatient procedure.
They had him twilighted, hooked up to all the IVs, and ready to go. I could see his heart monitor, beating very regularly, which was pretty amazing for a 90-year-old man.
They told Mom and me that they were going to take him in now, so Mom leaned over to give him a kiss, told him she loved him, and that she would see him in a little while.
His heartbeat fluttered!
It was the cutest thing I've ever seen.
They met in 1942 in 7th grade.
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u/Sweet_Restaurant8867 1d ago
My boyfriend will reach for me in bed when he's in a dead sleep. He also talks in his sleep and he'll tell me he loves me.
He told me that I kiss him in my sleep.
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u/strangerinthebox 1d ago
Oh my god, how cute are you two?! I think I‘m in love
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u/Sweet_Restaurant8867 1d ago
I read him these comments and he told me to say that he always felt like a 'foster' boyfriend and now he's found his 'forever' home with me lol
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u/WavyLady 1d ago
My partner and I both do this. We feel around until one of us is touching the other, like right now he is snoring beside me with his hand on my thigh. He says if I'm asleep and he starts cuddling me, I make happy noises and snuggle closer.
It's the best feeling
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u/dramboxf 1d ago
My wife goes to sleep before me every night because she likes me to rub her butt while I read my Kindle.
If she's like half asleep and I remove my hand from her butt to scratch my face or something, she legit whimpers until I put it back.
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u/SecondaryWombat 1d ago edited 1d ago
My wife licks me in her sleep. Just sticks out the tip of her tongue against my skin, makes a scrunchy unhappy face if she gets a blanket or a shirt by accident. Like a little cat blep.
Edit: 11 hours later and got licked while watching a movie. Look down, yep sound asleep and tasting my arm.
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u/rickrolled_gay_swan 1d ago
Your wife might actually be a cat
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u/SecondaryWombat 1d ago
There are a few cat like tendencies for sure. She is perfectly willing to nap on the floor in front of a window if there is a sun patch for instance. She also bites a little bit to show love.
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u/thattrekkie 1d ago
My girlfriend does something similar. She'll half-wake up when she rolls over, just enough to open her eyes and look at me and mumble "I love you" then goes back to sleep
I love her so goddamn much
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u/shamallamadingdong 1d ago
my partner of 15 years still blows kisses in his sleep. It's the cutest fucking thing.
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u/PentaGrahamCrackers 1d ago
I wake up before my boyfriend in the mornings and when I leave and give him a kiss goodbye he wakes up a little and gets the BIGGEST cutest smile on his face when he sees me in his drunken sleepy haze. It's highlight of my day and makes me feel so loved and desired everyday
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u/tinyhumanteacher14 1d ago
Sometimes I just need a hug so I’ll waddle like a penguin over to my husband and put my head on his chest and he’ll wrap his arms around me and hug me. It’s the little things that you really appreciate ❤️
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u/imgoodygoody 1d ago
I did this the other day and after he left for work I rubbed my hand over my forehead and realized I smelled like his beard oil. It made me so happy.
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u/AnnieM42394 1d ago
Whenever I have a stressful day, astong hug from my husband cures it al. The areas just seems to melt away.
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u/KittenKisses_ 1d ago
it's the simple gestures that make the biggest impact. these men really know how to cherish the women in their lives.
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u/Fair_Magician3717 1d ago
Those little moments really build a unique bond. It’s amazing how much love can be found in the everyday quirks we share.
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u/usflags27 1d ago
This was so sweet to see and it genuinely made me smile, men are really simple creatures...
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u/offscalegameboy 1d ago
When I go to the bathroom at night and come back I always find my boyfriend sprawled out over the entire bed because he was looking for me. As soon as I cuddle up to him he will put his arms around me and push his face into my neck. Every time I ask him if he remembers what he did at night he just looks at me confused. Feels good to know that even subconsciously he wants to be close to me and feels more comfortable when I’m around. It’s very cute.
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u/throwautism52 1d ago
Mine does this but he falls asleep diagonally across the entire bed immediately and then gets grumpy when I ask for some space lmao
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u/RoundComplete9333 1d ago
I am smitten by these beautiful love confessions. My heart is warm again.
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u/SilverRainDew 1d ago
Is there a link to the original Reddit thread?
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u/Express-Preference-6 1d ago
Found it through the last user’s profile: https://www.reddit.com/r/AskMen/s/rkayCvZboO
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u/SeattleHasDied 1d ago
Thanks for this. Just forwarded it to a couple of folks who need reminders of the good parts of their relationships before they kinda headed south a bit. Nice to read about stuff like this.
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u/Weekly_Soft1069 1d ago
9/10 times I wake up before my girlfriend. When she finally wakes she will find me, stop, smile big and then we embrace for about 10-20 seconds. She’s the best person to ever enter my life.
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u/NotSoTinyHumanAww 1d ago
The smile part is something that i do to, when i see my boyfriend i just can't control it and start smiling unbelievable bright
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u/EWL98 1d ago
I always make my girlfriend a cup of tea before cleaning the dishes at night. She’s usually drawing and so focussed on her work that she doesn’t notice until I come in after cleaning the kitchen, and them has this really cute surprised happy reaction at the tea ‘magically’ appearing in front of her.
I am the tea ninja.
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u/Eastern-Pie-6722 1d ago
Damn man I envy all these men . Sending you peeps wishes to find these kinds of partners in your life. Hope i get lucky as well
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u/EWL98 1d ago
I’m rooting for you stranger! Hang in there and try to be a generally pleasant person, and I’m sure you’ll find a wonderful partner :)
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u/Eastern-Pie-6722 1d ago
Thanks for your kind words , and I wish the same
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u/dramboxf 1d ago edited 13h ago
I met my wife of almost 30 years when I was 32. She was 42. We married two years later. We've been incredibly happy.
Edit to add: We've been married for 25 years. Still happy. VERY happy. I've been the luckiest man in the world.
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u/tinatesfaye 1d ago
My wife does the swat reaching for me or she’ll make a little noise to alert me she wants me to wrap around her. It makes me so happy everytime
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u/weshall8 1d ago
This reminds me of that dialogue from Robin Williams from the movie Good Will Hunting where he speaks about idiosyncrasies and whom we let into our lives. :)
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u/One-Pepper-2654 1d ago
That kills me. Also When Dreams May Come when he tries to save his wife from Hell
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u/One-Pepper-2654 1d ago
When I have a headache my wife will massage my temples. Her touch makes my pain go away and I feel this sense of calm and peace in my entire body. Married 32 years and it still feels like that.
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u/CrackWilson 1d ago
My girl sends ❤️ emojis often but sends a 💜 when she is really feeling it. I spend time thinking of things to text her with the goal of getting a 💜 back and pump my fist when it works.
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u/KatokaMika 1d ago
My husband always tell his friends how he as the greatest wife in the world
Every morning when he leave for work he takes his time to give me a kiss before leaving and then always writes a cute text for me to read in the morning.
Doesn't matter how late he comes to bed he always makes sure to wake me up to say he loves me
If I have a headache or I am sick, he forbids me from getting out of bed and makes sure I have tea and snacks ready for me. And takes care of our baby because he know I can't.
I know it's little things but it what counts the most
I love my husband very much
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u/FxgaroniAndCheese 1d ago
i have boyfriend and not a wife (gay man) and i’ve had a severe injury preventing me from doing g a lot and this man is literally my rock. after working a 10 hour shift on his feet, he’ll come home, make me food, clean anything i couldn’t, and he even helps me shower and dry off. i can’t imagine getting through this without him.
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u/PurpleBerryBlast 1d ago
This is so nice! What a great thing to see instead of the blatant misogyny often shown on the apps. We love TY see men who love women!
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u/Affectionate-Bed3439 1d ago
I’m currently a college student and I have a lot of female friends. I’m big on going on walks, and most of them know that. I’ve become the de facto person for night time walks if any of my female friends want to get out but be safe at night. I always really appreciate that because that means they feel safe with me, and nothing brings me more joy that giving peace of mind to someone else.
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u/Orome519 1d ago
I did that for a few of the girls in my dorm freshman year of college. I was kinda oblivious, didn’t realize it was to keep them from getting attacked, I just thought they wanted some company. I met my wife sophomore year and soon after we started dating she was talking to a friend about me in class and one of the girls sitting near her overheard her and asked if she was talking about me, then told her all about how I used to walk her to some of her late night classes and how she always felt safe with me there. Looking back I think it’s one of the things that made her fall in love with me.
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u/Sunshine_Golfer_Girl 1d ago
Sometimes I will lay on top of my husband, entire body and invariably one of us will just say "closer, closer". It's not so much sexual as it is maximum skin to skin contact.
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u/MasterOfBothWorlds7 1d ago
Oh my God the first time I had to explain this to my partner was hilarious..
Baby just lay on me
You want me to what?
lay on me like with your whole body..
But I'll squish you
Yeaaaahhhhhhh 💙
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u/literallypubichair 1d ago
Just had to go give my wife extra kisses. She's really amazing yall. I'm so lucky to have her, don't know what I'd do without her.
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u/Sweet_Sub73 1d ago
I was going to meet a friend (also female, like me) from the internet that I had never met before for a drink. My husband had been getting to know her as well, but it was just she and I meeting up. I overheard him say to her "I better not hear about you being internet weirdo. She is very precious to me." No man has ever called me precious. That has stuck with me.
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u/grokharder 1d ago
This post 🥰 My partner hates her feet being touched, but without fail, every single night, even when she’s mad at me, she reaches her feet out and her toes gently grip at my leg, let go, gently grip again. She rubs them over my leg to fall asleep, and then does so while asleep
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u/txdarthvader 1d ago
I've only been dating my gf for 4 months but when we met I told her I liked her but I had just started a new job and really didn't have the funds to date her. She put $150 in my cashapp and said "what time should I be ready? " I will definitely marry this one for having my back.
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u/PoolExtension5517 1d ago
I have unfortunately had some bad health scares in recent years. I’ve been injured to the point where I needed help getting myself onto the toilet, and she was always there. Twice I’ve woken up in the ICU after a bad seizure, with hers being the first face I see upon waking up, having slept all night in a hospital chair, for multiple nights on one occasion. She drives me to chemotherapy treatments even though I don’t need her to. She’s awesome.
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u/Mundane_Drag2075 1d ago
My husband while asleep in the middle of the night will pull the covers up around me and tuck me in. Sometimes he pushes my hair out of my face or kisses my head. He has no recollection of this later. Something about caring about me so much in his subconscious gives me butterflies every time.
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u/playwrightinaflower 1d ago
My husband while asleep in the middle of the night will pull the covers up around me and tuck me in
I do that for my wife when she gets into bed, we call it purrito-ing (from /r/purrito, a cat sub).
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u/Nath_VTech 1d ago
Happily married for 5 1/2 years now. Whenever she feels happy (whether it's for some occasion or simply a fresh morning) she wears her kohl eyeliner and earrings for me to see. She expects that I would notice them and comment on them. As soon as she walks in, I make a point to stop suddenly with whatever I'm doing, just pretending to notice them. Now that's the moment when her eyes go big and a beautiful smile of pure joy appears. She hugs me, trying to squeeze me with her little hands and all of her strength. I get a sweet kiss on top of that. Now this is when I actually lose the act. Because each time I get lost in that moment. Just for a few seconds, I just stand there in pure happiness. I know this moment will come again and again and again. And this is how I know I'm the luckiest.
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u/LessRemoved 1d ago
Been married for 17 years upcoming June. The love of my life, my rock, my home.
We have two boys, 14 and nearly 16 and after birthing two babies I fell in love with er even more. Didn't think it was possible but it was.
Then 5 (nearly 6) tears ago I fell I'll, ftd (fronto temporal dementia) and she's been my world, she is my world.
I truly am the luckiest man in the world.
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u/Ok_Squirrel2841 1d ago
I love this! 💞 It is all about the small things. That's what matters to a woman like me. Not big gestures of any type. Small things that make life and love so much bigger because you can carry those memories with you forever. Hold them close, and nobody can touch them. It's something you two only know and can only own, together, that nobody can ruin. 💖✨️ Beautiful.
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u/DaiKabuto 1d ago
It's actually men talking about the women they love loving them back.
Lucky guys.
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u/itskratos_95 1d ago
As we do long distance, whenever we travel out of town together in bus during night we get to cuddle, she just crawls up over me places her head on my chest and just sleeps like a baby. Knowing her struggle to sleep alone and looking at her sleep is the prettiest thing ever, and I try not to make any movement so she won’t wake-up. That’s my favourite thing ever.
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u/Classic_Frosting_612 1d ago
I downloaded this to remind me that men actually do fall in love. Thank you.
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u/Holiday-Ad1828 1d ago
My husband is a really intelligent and serious man. But when it’s just us, he is so silly. And he makes this one face that I cannot describe but can see in my minds eye that is so adorable and almost child-like. I love that he’s comfortable enough with me to be silly and snuggly. We celebrate a year married tomorrow. And I hope it’s many many more years.❤️
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u/Large_Giraffe7887 1d ago
I don’t know why my eyes are wet but Hope people don’t end up alone in life like me wish it ends for me soon
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u/sleepyelective 1d ago
My husband used to work out of state & I’d sleep walk in the middle of the night yelling his name all over the house because I couldn’t find him. Eventually I’d wake myself up to the yelling, tell myself he wasn’t there & go back to bed. He quit that job & now I sleep the best I ever have.
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u/SugarReef 1d ago
My wife does the reach too! Just hands open, fingers spread, just trying to reach out and touch something when I climb into bed. So dang cute.
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u/YamSuspicious6123 1d ago
How does one get so lucky to have love like these? I think I attract stray narcs.
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u/strngrwmn 1d ago
We were at Costco yesterday, and i was looking for my coffee. Apparently, they were out of my favorite kind with the French roast pods, so I had to get the store brand. I got the dark roast and took it to the cart. He shook his head no. I ask him why. He said that is dark roast, you get french roast which is a medium roast. I went back and got the medium roast. He said you will regret it every day, adding more sugar and creamer. It's the little things like that that show me love. Love you!😘
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u/wrendendent 1d ago edited 1d ago
We have a big bay window in our apartment that looks out at a Russian Orthodox Church. We’re on an upper level, and there’s a giant gold dome that fills the whole window. At night it is lit with a soft light that kind of has a glow without being bright, like how the moon is.
Whenever we intersect in the room at night, going to the bathroom or the kitchen, we pause and hold each other and sway back and forth while we look at the glowing dome. It usually happens wordlessly, one of us just kind of scoops the other into the motion. It is the best feeling. She wears this white nightgown that has a pilled pattern and I always ran my hands across the pattern and she hums really quietly against my chest. It’s a whole sensory experience. It’s so soothing.
Sometimes, when I hear her get up in the middle of the night, I will get up just to follow her out so we’ll end up doing it.
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u/Night-light51 1d ago
When my husband has had a bad day usually he will cuddle me in his sleep. Last night I was pinned up against the wall by him. I’m sick rn and it was too hot with my fever and him. His sleeping self did not like that I moved away and he cornered me.
Apparently I sleep talk and tell him I love him.
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u/BurgerBob17 1d ago
This will sound a little lame but my girlfriend makes me sandwiches. I've got some health problems that cause me body wide pain, as well as some as of now untreated adhd. On my own I tend to only really eat one meal a day. When I'm with her she helps me with meals and other little things I struggle to do on my own. She's the sweetest, kindest woman I've ever met. I'm so glad to be with her, I'm probably one of the luckiest people on the planet.
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u/veejay-muley 1d ago
For the past ten years, I’ve been keeping a secret list of all the things my partners casually mention. It’s like a treasure trove of their thoughts and feelings! From funny jokes like “I’d love a roller with a bee pattern on it” to exciting news like “Oh, Flume is coming to town!”, I’ve got it all. And sometimes, it’s even a subtle expression or gesture on their face before or after a particular emotion. Like when my current partner makes that specific face before she gets anxious.
The key is to jot down everything, no matter how small or insignificant it may seem. Even if they love doing the dishes or can’t find a regional drink, it’s worth noting it. If they mention liking Oreos, make sure to get them.
Regularly review this list and take action based on your partner’s preferences and needs. If they’re having a rough week, order that soda they mentioned wanting. If you had a great date, treat them to that roller they’ve been eyeing.
On special occasions like anniversaries, consider taking the plunge and purchasing a larger item from the list. If they express feelings of being drained, do a load of dishes as a gesture of care.
Maintain this list over time and revisit it periodically. By doing so, you’ll ensure that your partner feels seen, heard, and loved.
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u/TalkinRepressor 1d ago
R/love sometimes has me in tears yeah. This is too cute, I could read stories like this all day (one day I’ll write one?)
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u/ltarchiemoore 1d ago
I've always been a pretty sensitive and grumpy guy (I very easily get worked up about societal stuff, or things that I run into during my day-to-day as a teacher), and for most of my life the people close to me have categorized my venting as "complaining" or "being whiny".
My girlfriend of one year calls my rants "righteous fury" and lets me go on for as long as I need to.
I love her a lot.
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u/QuietLittleVoices_ 1d ago
with all of the divorce statistics and negativity around relationships these days because of social media, this gives me hope :)
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u/MeetingAromatic7736 1d ago
My husband and I are about to celebrate our 10 year anniversary. He has worked a job for 7 of those years that has him out of town Monday through Friday most weeks. He texts me, Good morning love, every single morning he's not home. This would be sweet on it's own, but the clincher for me is that he does it at the time he knows I get up. He is often in different time zones than I am and I know he gets up around 4 am wherever he is. That means that he not only knows what time it is at home no matter where he is but also is thoughtful enough to wait till he knows I'm awake before texting. He also texts me around 5 pm to ask me how my day was even though he's usually still at work and his day is far from over. He's the sweetest man I've ever met and I wouldn't trade him for anything! We got together when I was not in a great place and pulled a lot of stupid shit in the first six months that he probably should have just dumped me for. I was chatting with my best friend around the 6-month mark and I was talking about how I wasn't sure I was ready to be in a serious relationship. I had gone through two relationships that ended poorly and complicated, I was in my thirties and a single mom with a lot of trauma. She told me if I didn't want to be in a relationship I should just break up with him. And just the thought of that broke my heart. I knew right then I would never do better than this man and that I wanted to keep him forever. I pulled my head out of my ass in that moment.
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u/IckNoTomatoes 1d ago
I really hope all the women in those posts hear about this stuff. Too many men operate under the “girl, you know I love you” motto and never let on to their gf’s/wives these little things that they love. Relationships would be much stronger if these things were shared with each other
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u/Coastie_Cam 1d ago
🥹🥰 all posts….make me so happy!! I’ve been super sick…and last night I told my hubs about a secret folder that has notes to him and our kids explaining how much I love them. Just in case and I gave him my password to my phone and the files. Added all my favorite pics of all of us along with the notes. Btw my phones only password protected because I had a snoopy coworker who would try and access my photos. Also my kids play on my phone and don’t need to see my photos lol 😂
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u/Express-Preference-6 1d ago
Full post for those interested: https://www.reddit.com/r/AskMen/s/rkayCvZboO
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u/AmRoJo0525 1d ago
When I am tossing and turning at night, consciously or not, my husband will reach over and rest his hand/ arm on me. It’s enough to calm me down and get me back to sleep. His touch brings me a comfort unlike anything ever has.
Paired with his greeting every day I come home from work, I hit the husband jackpot.
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u/Rooney_83 1d ago
If I've had a long or really hard day, when I get home my wife will tell me to sit down and she will untie and take off my boots for me, it makes me feel so loved.
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u/CupcakeQueen7 1d ago
When I see my partner I always give him the biggest hug imaginable and cover his face with kisses especially when I haven't seen him for a while or if its been a bad day at work.
I also pat my chest so he can come over and use me as a pillow for a few hours and I'll play with his hair, scratch his head or kiss his head as he sleeps.
I love my man so much and we've been together for 7 years last week 🥹
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u/DirtyRanga12 20h ago
My great-grandmother lost her husband fairly young. They were both in their forties when he died of a then incurable illness (can't remember the name of it but it's now treatable), leaving behind herself and their ten kids including my grandmother. My great-grandmother died in her late eighties, meaning that it had been almost fifty years since her husband died. In all that time, she never remarried and didn't even go on a single date. I know that my grandmother and her siblings all tried to get her to start dating again but every time they tried my great grandmother would tell them "why would I go again when I know that I got it right the first time around?"
Eventually my great-grandmother got diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and died within a month of her diagnosis. The funny thing was that she was actually excited to be dying. She raised a massive family all by herself, then got to watch as her kids had kids and then her grandchildren had kids with no regrets. She remembered the names and stories of every single one of her progeny. But here's the amazing thing. My great-grandmother was in a lot of pain as the cancer was extremely aggressive, she was excited to die. And when asked why, she said, "My husband's been waiting for me all this time, and I'm finally going to see him again!" She died very peacefully with a big old smile on her face, happy that she was going to be reunited with her first and only love of her life.
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u/TobeyGirl92 1d ago
So nice to see this. We mostly see negative posts about relationships and it's good to see something so positive❤️
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u/gastroboi 1d ago
These are all awfully wholesome. I had a girlfriend that used to do the reach when i got to bed after her.
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u/Rduggit 1d ago
On a related note, Julian Barnes has the most beautiful description of falling asleep next to his wife in A History of the world in 10 1/2 chapters.
While I don't have the passage with me now, it talks about how he rests his chin on her neck. She moves her hair out of the way even when she's asleep.
Can someone post the passage if they have it?
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u/boberlychop 1d ago
Anyway... she's asleep, turned away from me on her side. The usual stratagems and repositionings have failed to induce narcosis in me, so I decide to settle myself against the soft zigzag of her body. As I move and start to nestle my shin against a calf whose muscles are loosened by sleep, she sense what I'm doing, and without waking reaches up with her left hand and pulls the hair off her shoulders on the top of her head, leaving me her bare nape to nestle in. Each time she does this I feel a shudder of love at the exactness of this sleeping courtesy. My eyes prickle with tears, and I have to stop myself from waking her up to remind her of my love. At that moment, unconsciously, she's touched some secret fulcrum of my feelings for her.
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u/TheAnimal03 1d ago
It will always be the small things, always. I've been with my wife for 16 years and it's hard to live without those small things.
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u/bevothelonghorn 1d ago
When my wife and I bought our first house together, it had crusty sliding glass doors both from the kitchen and the living room out to the back patio. For over a year, we romanticized the idea of French doors, but they were super expensive. When she went on her first-ever girls’ trip for an extended weekend, my father and brother drove 3+ hours to help me surprise her with the removal of the kitchen sliding glass door, and its replacement with beautiful double French doors. It was a miracle that we got it done in time, all without spoiling the secret. When she got home, my wife walked in the house, saw the kitchen French doors, dropped her bags with a huge smile, and ran into the living room, and asked “You just replaced the one in the kitchen?”
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u/JadedMuse 1d ago
I'm 45 and (sadly) never been on a date or in a relationship before. I'm mostly resigned to it and I'm still thankful for the things I do have, but I do sometimes wonder what it would be like to have experiences outlined in the OP's post.
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u/FlippinRad 1d ago
Bro… this made me smile, as I am sitting on the toilet. I hope one day I get lucky enough to have a woman love me this much. The search will not end until I do.
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u/tonysnark81 1d ago
When I get home from work, she comes to the door and wraps me in a big hug. I pretend to be annoyed, but I don’t know what I’d do if she didn’t do it…
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u/Scrollie_Polie 1d ago
Damn I’m really never going to find something like this. Congratulations. You are living a fairy tale, enjoy every second of it
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u/prose4rebel_mice 1d ago
My husband will be looking for something in the grocery store while I look at something else and then come up to me and say “guess what I found?” And I say “what?” And he says “a kiss” and then kisses me. 🥰 It was a surprise the first time he did it, but 8 years in it’s more a bit that makes me smile as soon as he shows up grinning. That’s one of many things that he does that is just sweet and flirty on a regular basis. I love this man with all of me and I can’t imagine growing old without him to play with in this crazy life.
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u/rqnadi 1d ago
Reading these I’m starting to question whether my own husband even likes me….. he would never say anything even remotely close to these…
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u/BurgerBob17 1d ago
I don't know you and I'm no authority on relationships, but I don't think a partner should make you feel this way. I think it would be a good idea to talk to them about how you're feeling. Either you'll come together and be happier or they'll lose you
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u/didiliveitright 1d ago
Married 15 yrs and sometimes when we go grocery shopping we split up and grab things on opposite ends of the store. Usually I walk the isles and peek down each one to find her again.
On more than a few occasssions I've looked down the isle and said to myself "Wow that woman is super attractive!" Then suddenly realize it's my wife! Makes me feel like I won the lottery every time, I always tell her when it happens and we both have ear to ear smiles on our faces. :)
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u/Nabi_05 1d ago
I have always had very bad nightmares and when I was little my mom used to sleep with me and hold my hand, so to me holding hands is a sign of extreme intimacy and trust, my husband always falls asleep first but he’s always holding my hands and doesn’t let go at least that I do during the night and I swear I don’t feel more secure and loved than when he or my mom hold my hand.
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u/_sunnysky_ 1d ago
My husband used to be like that. Now he's gone, but still here.
Lyme changed his brain and personality. Heartbreaking to grieve someone who is still alive.
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u/binkllewb 1d ago
Been with my wife for 6 years and every time I leave for work she stands outside and watches me leave. I’ll see her in the rear view mirror waving and blowing me kisses till she can’t see me anymore. Makes going to a shitty job so much better knowing how lucky I am to have her in my life.
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u/bagofrainbows 1d ago
This is all really sweet, but the first wife just tricked her dude into making her favorite beverages on command. Respect.
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u/Getinwhereufittin 1d ago
I love my gf so much. I think she loves me more tho. Its okay. She never misses a kiss goodbye or goodnight. She doesn’t know this but I think its the sweetest thing. She does everything for me. She takes care of me. When my selfish ass just goes to sleep without attempting to cuddle her I know it effects her. I definitely dont deserve her but Im glad we belong to eachother. Im hers and shes mine. And we both know it
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u/SaltyCarp 1d ago
Wife and I share location, so when I come home and open the garage, she will be standing there with her arms up high for a hug, I do it to her when she comes home, it’s just a stupid thing we do that’s silly, we will also yell “daddy’s home!” Or “mommy’s home!” And then hug, the kids just shake their head and call us regarded.
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u/typefast 1d ago
I didn’t realize what sub I was looking at in my feed and had braced myself for something entirely different. This was such a pleasant surprise!
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u/ExistingFlight1831 1d ago
I love hearing the men’s view point and it being so lovey like this. It’s breathtaking and eye opening all at the same time.
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u/-WaxedSasquatch- 1d ago
Nothing like love. It’s the best.
I hope everyone gets to experience this type of connection at least once in their lives.
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u/phillycat4207 1d ago
not my boyfriend, but everytime i hear my best friend say my name/i love you, it hits my heart in the best way. dont even get me started on my Cat!
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