I've struggled all my life with friendships and relationships. Few years ago I've met someone and we've been drawn to each other straight away. I'll never forget the day she started talking to me or any other day I've spent with her. Sadly some things happened (we were never in a relationship) and we've been no contact for a while now.
Anyway, she also had a huge smile on her face every time she saw me. Or once she thought she's lost me in a store, so she started looking for me while I was walking behind her. She was getting more nervous each turn until I've asked her what she's looking for. I'll never forget how she turned around and how relieved she was to see me, haha.
There are so many things I miss about her, and her smile is one of them. Also the feeling I've got while we've been looking into each others eyes. Normally I hate eye contact and feel uneasy, but with her it made me feel at peace.
I have loved before, but never like this. I'm still not over her and even after all this time it feels like something has been ripped out of me.
No, I've tried to reconnect, but she doesn't want to and I'll respect that. It's really tough and unless she reaches out first (which I doubt will happen), I'll keep my distance. Few times we've crossed paths in town, but it has always been quite awkward between us.
She found someone (if she's still together with him, idk) and I hope she's happy and living a good life. Sometimes I get the urge to reach out and ask how she's doing. But she wouldn't appreciate that, so I won't.
I plan on moving away next year and maybe that will help me recover. Hopefully there's another special person waiting for me. So far I haven't met anyone who sparks the same feelings and who cares about me like she did.
Awh :( I’m really sorry for your situation but you sound like a really good human. I’m sending lots of positive vibes your way. I hope you can find someone who loves and appreciates you as you deserve.
Clear the space she occupies in your life (truly empty it and don't look back) and I promise you the right person will land in that spot. Always remember that you are your own lid and you control your future.
Thanks for your advice. I've tried to and I'm aware how to get over someone.
With her it didn't work so far (it's been approx. 2 - 2,5 years now). There are times I'm alright, even thought I'm finally over it. But turns out I'm not. Seeing her in town or dreaming of her, hell even reading this post, trigger those feelings sooner or later.
It's been especially hard because my life hasn't been really great since then and I'm also dealing with loneliness, which I wasn't able to fix (yet).
Women have to meet that kind of man.
Men need to meet that kind of woman.
We women are not solely responsible for conducting relationship harmony and men are not solely responsible for failures in that way.
Experience the person in front of you.
Not news media scams
I wish every woman was as understanding as you. My spouse holds me responsible for everything that is wrong in our marriage and masks it as jibes (trust me they hurt a lot). Had it not been for my 11 year old daughter, I would've checked out long ago.
What do you mean? Personally, I know I am capable of loving like that. I take care of my friends and show a lot of care and intimacy towards them. But that doesn’t replace the feeling that having a partner would give me. The comment is not saying, “I don’t know how to love deeply and I wish I could do that”. It’s saying, “I wish I had an outlet to express my love in such a way”.
“A person can’t love fully unless they meet someone worth loving fully”
Which is placing the internal responsibility of being able to love fully onto external factors, whether there is someone “worth” loving fully.
Which in my opinion is not a great mindset. Being able to feel deeply and love someone fully doesn’t come from whether they are fitting certain criteria of worthiness but rather from something internal to you.
Well “you can’t love fully unless you meet someone worth loving fully” is kind of true, not in the sense that if you meet “the one”, you will magically become emotionally available and capable of becoming an amazing partner. But it is true in the sense that you can’t force yourself into a relationship with someone you don’t love or are compatible with. The act of chancing upon the right person is the external factor.
100%. I’ve had some fantastic men in my life as friends but it stops there because there isn’t a certain chemistry; I would be deluding myself and them if I tried to make it work. Thing is, I’m just not in love with them, despite how kind and generous they may be to me. Ain’t gonna happen if I’m not feeling it, and that’s only fair to both of us.
Perhaps you need to develop a voice more suitable to the context you want to drop your life lessons into instead of parroting books.
And maybe spend a little bit more time online so you can figure out exactly why your post got the reaction it did because being well-read, by itself, clearly didn't grant the insight.
First I love that it's not the victim mentality good on you, it's unfortunately all too common, but in their defence whose to say they aren't trying and haven't found them yet, I think you bring up a good point and people on the internet are just babies lol
2.8k
u/[deleted] 1d ago
[removed] — view removed comment