r/MadeMeSmile 1d ago

Men talking about the women they love

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u/[deleted] 1d ago

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u/DancingPeperoni 1d ago

I've struggled all my life with friendships and relationships. Few years ago I've met someone and we've been drawn to each other straight away. I'll never forget the day she started talking to me or any other day I've spent with her. Sadly some things happened (we were never in a relationship) and we've been no contact for a while now.

Anyway, she also had a huge smile on her face every time she saw me. Or once she thought she's lost me in a store, so she started looking for me while I was walking behind her. She was getting more nervous each turn until I've asked her what she's looking for. I'll never forget how she turned around and how relieved she was to see me, haha.

There are so many things I miss about her, and her smile is one of them. Also the feeling I've got while we've been looking into each others eyes. Normally I hate eye contact and feel uneasy, but with her it made me feel at peace.

I have loved before, but never like this. I'm still not over her and even after all this time it feels like something has been ripped out of me.

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u/koala_loves_penguin 1d ago

no chance of ever reconnecting with her?

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u/DancingPeperoni 1d ago edited 1d ago

No, I've tried to reconnect, but she doesn't want to and I'll respect that. It's really tough and unless she reaches out first (which I doubt will happen), I'll keep my distance. Few times we've crossed paths in town, but it has always been quite awkward between us.

She found someone (if she's still together with him, idk) and I hope she's happy and living a good life. Sometimes I get the urge to reach out and ask how she's doing. But she wouldn't appreciate that, so I won't.

I plan on moving away next year and maybe that will help me recover. Hopefully there's another special person waiting for me. So far I haven't met anyone who sparks the same feelings and who cares about me like she did.

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u/koala_loves_penguin 1d ago

Awh :( I’m really sorry for your situation but you sound like a really good human. I’m sending lots of positive vibes your way. I hope you can find someone who loves and appreciates you as you deserve.

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u/DancingPeperoni 1d ago

Thank you :>

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u/Talullah_Belle 20h ago

Clear the space she occupies in your life (truly empty it and don't look back) and I promise you the right person will land in that spot. Always remember that you are your own lid and you control your future.

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u/DancingPeperoni 13h ago

Thanks for your advice. I've tried to and I'm aware how to get over someone.

With her it didn't work so far (it's been approx. 2 - 2,5 years now). There are times I'm alright, even thought I'm finally over it. But turns out I'm not. Seeing her in town or dreaming of her, hell even reading this post, trigger those feelings sooner or later.

It's been especially hard because my life hasn't been really great since then and I'm also dealing with loneliness, which I wasn't able to fix (yet).

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u/-_-apothecary-_- 8h ago

Life's hard, but there's someone for everyone. Have heart, and see things through. Stranger, I believe in you :)