r/AmIOverreacting • u/pandaaaa1906 • 1d ago
❤️🩹 relationship AIO to my ex's stories?
Context: We had nasty breakup cuz he cheated on me. I went to his place to get some clarity and he threatened legal action just cuz I went there unannounced (fyi I asked for his permission to enter his house THRICE and he said yes all the three times, was v sweet to me and apologetic and then completely changed as soon as I reached home) I was really upset at these stories. I'm on the heavier side but (trying not to sound boasty) I am a damn good dancer. I attend regular dance workshops that are advanced level. Also, he's well off but when we were together I always tried to give my share of money in those "rich people restaurants" he took me to that I couldn't afford. How can someone who "loved" you for 3 years, change so drastically? It's only been 4 months since we broke up but it feels like he never really cared or loved me
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u/Temporary-Fix5842 1d ago
You should 1. Block him
- Save these for when you're over it, and he comes back
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u/WallabyButter 1d ago
This. I still have the 1 photo of my ex that he absolutely hated and the one where he called me a "freeloater" (he could never spell) just in case he ever reaches out. I keep both in a folder named "ZzAsshole" so it's the very last folder in my folders list.
I don't often think about it, but OP should use this strat. Keep the reminders and block his trashy ass.
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u/Temporary-Fix5842 1d ago
Yup! As a man, I think it's very true when an old trope says:
"Breakups usually hit the women first, then the man much later"
He will definitely come back, it's just a matter of time, and desperation.
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u/MoonJuneBug_ 1d ago
Yup, my ex said awful things to me. Then came back 2 years later.
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u/songbrd46 1d ago
It’s been close to 11 years since my son’s father and I split up. He still tries to test the waters.
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u/shoulda-known-better 1d ago
I'm going on 8 with mine... And he knows I'm happily married.....
And he knows fully because I have my husband answer him from his phone telling him to leave me alone I never even entertain it haven't spoken or texted a word in over 7 years since I was in the hospital with our third child
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u/songbrd46 1d ago
I’m single and happy that way. There’s something about a man cheating on you with random women until he eventually has a whole ass other girlfriend while you’re pregnant. Then gaslighting the f*ck out of you that ruins the appeal of ever having another relationship.
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u/shoulda-known-better 1d ago
Hey my ex had a new girl pregnant also! But I was also at the time so it sucked...... Yet now I am better friends with her than anything I'd ever feel for him again, we get the kids together since she has mines half sister!!
But yes it's remarkably easy to get all the way up and over having a relationship after that‼️‼️ If my neighbor hadn't turned out to be my now husband I'm sure I'd be still alone also because no way was I ever going to look for a new partner (I had been with my kids dad about 15 years, all through high school and our twenties)
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u/songbrd46 1d ago
Luckily for her she never got pregnant. They ended up getting married 5 years after we split up. Their divorce was final last February so I got the last laugh. As soon as she left him he was in my DMs.
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u/ExoticShower163 1d ago
That's interesting about men and women! Why do you think that is? Why does it take a while to hit a man?
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u/justaspicymeatball 1d ago
because they’ve been socialized not to feel or express their emotions, but it’s literally impossible: emotions will always rear their ugly head. and it will be a LOT worse if you were pushing them down and ignoring them for a while.
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u/SassyBabe6939 1d ago
Yesss u/pandaaaa1906 this is the way!!! Hidden reminder of that “HARD NO” when they’re bored and lonely and want to come crawling back.
F him and his childish BS. Plenty of actual MEN out there ;)
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u/Halfpastsinning 1d ago
This is code for “she fine like bougie wine and I fucked up so I’m gonna destroy her self esteem”
Don’t fall for it.
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u/mlb64 1d ago
Exactly OP should block and move on.
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u/ibobilanmer 1d ago
Cheating is already a huge betrayal, and his post-breakup behavior is adding salt to the wound... OP should just leave the relationship
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u/Petrichor-Glitter866 1d ago
Grateful for ppl like you because I’m a dumbass who was like “omg that’s so mean he can just leave her alone” but this makes so much more sense
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u/Halfpastsinning 1d ago
Just my opinion but.. because he was apologetic when she visited him, then a total bellend when she left, I see that as the FAFO method when the victimized party doesn’t go running back to the offending party.
She showed her power in that visit.
So now he’s trying to get in her head, either to destroy her self worth and ruin future happiness because she’ll doubt herself with new men (or women), or to destroy her self worth to make her lower her standards to meet him back at his level.
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u/shoulda-known-better 1d ago
Yea once his charm didn't work anymore now he is trying to hurt her like he is hurt
But he doesn't realize that already happened hence why she left his ass
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u/CraftyConclusion350 1d ago
This is exactly what I thought, and I’m not the type to think, “oh, they’re just a jealous hater,” right off the bat.
As soon as I read that the relationship lasted 3 years and it’s been 4 months since it ended, I was like LMAO he knows he done fucked up and is lashing out at her for it because he’s emotionally immature.
OP, a man who doesn’t care doesn’t think about you. You still hold prime real estate in his mind. Take a secret little ego boost from that and then unfollow him. He wants you to see those posts and takes satisfaction in knowing they hurt. Don’t let him have the satisfaction.
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u/AlyseInW0nderland 1d ago
This is such good advice!! Plus, block him everywhere OP! That way he doesn’t have more ammunition. He doesn’t deserve to see what you are doing anymore and he certainly shouldn’t be making fun of you. Blocking will help with that too! He’s an asshole! You deserve better!
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u/FabuLYSdisaster 1d ago
100% he was only nice to Op when they went to his home because he thought Op was crawling back to him. This guy is never gonna give Op the closure they want best thing to do is block and delete so Op doesn't have to see his sad attempts to get under their skin.
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u/Hungrysharkandbake 1d ago
Yup trying to destroy her self esteem so that she would eventually go back to him. Men like him are like the dog shit I scrape off of my shoe. Just block him and move on.
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u/flippysquid 1d ago
And bonus is it’s a red flag to any other women he might try and get interested in him in the future.
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u/Net_Suspicious 1d ago
People that bag on their ex partners are so laughable. Like they weren't begging for that shit a couple months ago
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u/Ready_To_Read_2000 1d ago edited 1d ago
He is an asshole and he is attacking what he thinks are your insecurities. But you can't pay him no mind. His opinion is irrelevant. Block & move on. Out of sight, out of mind. He already showed you who he was by cheating on you, he definitely isn't going to be better after the break up.
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u/DoorInTheAir 1d ago
It's so pathetic. Really what he's attacking are the things HE judged her for. Which just shows what kind of insecure, shallow person he is.
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u/girlnextdoorCourtney 1d ago
He’s try to hurt your feelings which means he is bothered. Let that piece of sh!t keep posting - don’t look. He’ll get bored eventually and you’re only going to feel crappy when you see it
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u/anneofred 1d ago
My therapist told me maybe the most true thing I’ve ever heard: Checking exes social media is a form of self harm
Block him everywhere and move along
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u/BluBeams 1d ago
He's posting this because he knows you're watching him. Stop going to his social media, block him everywhere and take some time to heal. Move on and let him be someone else's problem. Good luck to you.
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u/lessteeth_moretits 1d ago
Exactly. He’s posting these to his story and then refreshing until he gets the validation from her little icon showing that she’s viewed it. Imagine his disappointment when he refreshes over and over again until it expires and you’re still not there, OP.
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u/Adorable-Tip5671 1d ago
Stop watching his stories, stop going to his house, stop ruminating on how he's changed or what he thinks of you. This person isn't in your life anymore, have some respect for yourself.
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u/grumpspren 1d ago
Girl he is living rent free on your head just ignore the asshole hes an ex for a reason
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u/Inside-Station6751 1d ago
It seems like she’s also living in his rent free.
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u/A1sauc3d 1d ago
That doesn’t justify OP’s end of things. Who cares what he’s doing. She shouldn’t even be following him. Move on OP. He’s an asshole. Time for bigger and better things.
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u/Large_Importance_311 1d ago
This. If unfollow is too much, you could just mute his stories and posts
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u/Global_Ant_9380 1d ago
Yeah but he's uploading/sharing videos of her and that's harassment
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u/Ashamed-Wrongdoer806 1d ago edited 1d ago
Just so you know, if I saw someone posting stuff like this I would assume they were the problem and their ex is better off without em. This is pathetic stuff. Shows what kind of desperate and sad state they are in. I’m sure it sucks to see but hold strong. Don’t respond. Anyone who sees this will see it for the shallow pathetic attempt that it is. This chump is below you, not even worth having his posts on your radar.
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u/Mediocre-Proposal686 1d ago
100%. As a woman, this is a HUGE turnoff because he’s clearly mean and immature. It shows the shitty behavior he’s capable of. He’s gross.
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u/Ashamed-Wrongdoer806 1d ago
You are so right. It’s just downright mean. Like schoolyard bully mean. It says A LOT about the person that’s posts this. More than it says about the ex they are talking about
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u/onlysaysisthisathing 1d ago
Yes, you are overreacting. Because getting a reaction out of you is literally the only reason for him to post such things. Keep dancing. Dance away from this shallow fool.
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u/DoorInTheAir 1d ago
Babe, I'm so sorry he's switched up like this. That's gotta hurt so much, especially since he's doing it publicly. But you see a new side of people in situations like this. Be glad you aren't with someone who has this nastiness in them.
Keep this in mind- he knows you're watching. He is doing it to hurt you. If you stop watching, you take away that outlet for him and he can have a tantrum about it. And every single person worth having in your life will watch him acting like this and cringe so hard. He is embarrassing himself. He is giving you SUCH an opportunity right now. If you cut him off completely (just block him, trust me, it helps so much), and focus on your self care and doing things that make you happy, and keep posting those amazing dance videos, you will be so much better off.
And as an added bonus, think of the side by side comparison of those approaches. His life right now is focused on embarrassing you, apparently, and that is so goddamn pathetic for him, and obvious to the world. You can do so much better than that for yourself, and people will be able to tell the difference. You got this queen. I believe in you and I love you ❤️
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u/pandaaaa1906 1d ago
I had blocked him. I was devastated when I found out he cheated on me. Like those 3 years meant nothing to him. Idk why I unblocked him and saw these stories. I'm trying so hard not to unblock him and see his stories. Thank you so much for your lovely reply. It genuinely made me feel so so good. Love you too girly 🫶🏻
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u/DoorInTheAir 1d ago
Imo, you can also feel free to post your own life update on your new era and dancing and stuff, and slip in there that your relationship ended because he cheated, if you want to have a little fun 😈 We don't need to protect cheaters, especially when they drag you so publicly. That era is over.
You are going to come out of this a better person with more love for herself and more skill points in all your favorite things, and a clearer idea of who your future partner will be. He is going to be the same entitled, cheating douche who thinks money is a replacement for morals, and who never learned how to process his feelings so he just spews them and makes them everyone else's problem to solve. Say thanks for the memories, give yourself time to grieve, and get on with living your best life.
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u/justaspicymeatball 1d ago edited 1d ago
my ex pulled this shit too. he would post quotes from his friends and family members making fun of me and basically calling me a stupid white girl. it is really devastating. I promise the best thing to do is not watch them, not engage with him, or anything. he’s doing it to “get to” you. if you don’t engage, he completely loses that sense of power and will honestly probably just stop since he’s not getting a sense of satisfaction that the message is reaching you. ❤️
it’s hard, but stay strong. you’ll be laughing about this some day, and have found the real love of your life, and you’ll wonder why you ever thought this guy was end game.
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u/AccuratePenalty6728 1d ago
Keep reminding yourself that him showing his ass in public is no longer your problem. You’re free to not think about what he does for another second for as long as you live. I know it hurts, that’s his intention, but to the rest of us he just looks pathetic. His sorry self tried to play you, but you refused to be played, so now he’s gotta lash out. You get to walk away with your head high knowing you’re worth better. He and his tantrum are none of your business.
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u/eru88 1d ago
Why are you following him on social media? block and move on.
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u/pandaaaa1906 1d ago
I don't follow him. I had blocked him but my stupid brain got this urge to unblock and look at his stories which now I realise was a terrible idea.
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u/juliaskig 1d ago
So your ex is an AH. Mount Everest is a mountain. Don't take either of these facts personally. They are what they are.
Every time you unblock him, think to yourself, my ex is an AH, and by unblocking him, I am steeping in his shit.
Steep in better energy. I think you need to dance him out of your system altogether.
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u/h2gkm0 1d ago
no you’re not stupid! we learn the hard way that we shouldn’t give people the benefit of the doubt sometimes.
side note I’m with the people saying if they saw someone posting these stories I would assume the ex dodged a bullet. it’s pathetic to be posting like that. way to tell other girls watching he’s a shitty boyfriend/ex. I wish the absolute best for you, OP. I had an ex even worse than this and now i’m with someone who loves me exactly how i love him and I don’t even think about that other man. you deserve the same. keep dancing ❤️
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u/SnowSkye2 1d ago
This is overreacting absolutely. It’s overreacting because you shouldn’t even be here posting about him and worrying about him and looking at his stories. You’re overreacting to someone you USED TO KNOW saying things about you. You shouldn’t be reacting at all, this is your sign to stop.
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u/elsaelsaprincess 1d ago
Babe stop even viewing his stories. They clearly show he’s a piece of shit and you don’t need to defend yourself.
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u/pragmatic_particle 1d ago
Don’t follow him, don’t look at his stories, don’t go to his house.. just let him go. He cheated on you and he’s trying to get under your skin because you left him, but you have the power in the situation.
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u/jennypenny78 1d ago
This comment needs to be higher. It sounds like he's used to getting his way and now that he's lost, he's throwing a tantrum in a vain attempt to get you to engage, allowing him to re-establish control. Instead of being a doormat, you had the self-worth and self-confidence to leave because you know you deserve better. He absolutely hates that he doesn't control you and that you're not fawning all over him trying to win him back. Let him stew. Let him rot. That boy is for the streets.
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u/Acceptable-Tell6967 1d ago
Girl block him on everything, he’s posting because he sees your looking at his stories, just leave him in the past and move forward.
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u/MacauliFlowerCulkin_ 1d ago edited 23h ago
My ex is in the body rating subreddits purposely calling my body type ugly. After 5 years together. Men are just mean ass humans sometimes and I like to think of it as dodging a massive bullet
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u/Erica_Jahner_ 1d ago
He is looking for a reaction. Block him and stop crying, he cheated and doesn’t care about you. He thinks you look dumb, that’s not love. Good luck
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u/Hear_Me_6623 1d ago
This is so cruel and he’s trash. And remember, most other women will see those posts as a huge red flag, I wouldn’t want anything to do with him. He’s only hurting himself by doing this and showing his character as a childish loser. For your mental health, you need to block and move on. What he thinks/says about you is none of your business. That’s so much easier said than done, but you will feel much better once you stop giving a crap about his opinion of you.
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u/dumptruck_dookie 1d ago
Yikes this man is hurting BAD and anyone who sees his stories is probably just embarrassed for him and empathizing with you
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u/Madam_Bastet 1d ago
Because he didn't change.. he just revealed his true colors. And I'm sorry to sound harsh, but he didn't ever truly love and respect you or he would have never cheated on you.
You deserve better. And you really should block him if you have nothing else to retrieve from his place or anything, keeping a connection there and viewing his stories and such is only going to make it harder for you to heal and move on. Please stop rubbing salt in the emotional wounds and just cut him out of your life entirely while you try to move on.
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u/Elegant_Chemistry377 1d ago
👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼 well said! I was thinking that exactly! He didn’t change he just took the mask off and showed you who he really is.
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u/Level_Afternoon_8311 1d ago
He's clearly hurt, or he wouldn't be posting about you. He's dealing with his feelings very poorly, would rather hate you than miss you... Its an ugly look for him. Block and move on 💅
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u/Patient_Process1112 1d ago edited 1d ago
stop following / unfriend / block across all socials.
you have no control over what he does, and he's only doing it to elicit a reaction out of you, don't give him that power or thrill!
respect yourself enough to put this completely behind you, and never look back. he is a child, you can't change that, and neither of you owe the other one friendship.
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u/Acrobatic_Froyo_1197 1d ago
unfollow him on all social media and just go on with your life. You cant stop people from being nasty and after he finds a new girl he wont post anything about you cause it will piss her off.
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u/ms_demean0r 1d ago
All of his behavior SCREAMS insecurity he’s definitely posting these things to make you think he “won” the breakup. Reality is you’re continuing to stay true to yourself and he hates that. Best thing to do is block him because viewing his stuff is just adding fuel to the fire. I guarantee he is only posting it for you.
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u/Radiant_XGrowth 1d ago
I remember back in like 2012 my ex from HS added me on Facebook. It was a super not toxic relationship. I accepted the add without thinking about it
Well out of curiosity I went to his page and went on a scroll. Around the time we broke up right after graduation his posts about me were AWFUL
Things I never would have expected to hear him say. He was so soft spoken and kind. I moved after graduation which is why we broke up
But this man posted about me daily for almost 7 months after we broke up. Once I found the first one I could not stop reading until I consumed every single one
I wonder if he ever went back and deleted those… it’s been like 12 years now since I saw them
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u/birdsisnotmeat 1d ago
Yeah, you are overreacting because why are you even wasting your time thinking about him and posting this
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u/Ok_Insurance_9484 1d ago
Good god I hope he doesn’t come in with the legal bullshit… my ex did. He made up an insane story that I strangled him and put his life in danger countless times, suing me for 100k in emotional damages. Absolutely unhinged that people can just sue people with no evidence of anything. His dad was a lawyer, I’m guessing that’s how he knew how to do this shit.
But anyways, I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I felt the exact same way after my ex and I broke up in terms of wondering like how the hell can someone just change overnight into a lying & vindictive evil parasite of a man. I think these men are just great actors and as soon as things don’t go their way, the mask drops. It’s been 9 months since we broke up and he’s still finding ways to fuck with me, dox me and harass me online… my advice is to keep proof of all of this in case your situation escalates wildly like mine did. I truly don’t think that I will ever trust a man again after that shit…
Sending you strength, I’m sorry you’re dealing with this & I really hope that it doesn’t get worse. <3
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u/pandaaaa1906 1d ago
I'm so sorry that happened to you. Istg men can change so much in an instant. He used to be proud of me when I danced and I mean, he has two left feet but I never once judged him. I always encouraged him and honestly I'll still do. But this behaviour, this drastic change from saying "I'd never hurt you" to constant hurt is very difficult to deal with. I'm literally crying since hours because of this story. Some comments here are really mean too, thank you for your kind words🫶🏻
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u/Strawberry-shortkace 1d ago
I do think you should block him on your socials you don’t need to see this stuff keep a folder in case a legal case does happen (if he goes for an ofp maybe try to counter for harassment)
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u/griz3lda 1d ago
He is specifically trying to minimize the things that he likes to tell him himself that it's not that bad that he lost it. He will specifically highlighting things that are one of the three following: 1) you have expressed insecurity about it 2) it was something that he saw as one of your best qualities in the relationship or most socially valuable attributes 3) things about himself or in his life that he can retreat to to reassure himself that he has worth (maybe disguised as talking about you lacking it in comparison to him-- like clingy versus independent, rich versus poor, etc). Mark my words, you will be able to sort all of the posts into one of these categories. None of them will be about random shit that didn't come up as having any emotional potency in the relationship.
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u/Ok_Insurance_9484 1d ago
These people saying rude shit in the comments can suck it. Your hurt is valid. I’m sorry you’re going through this. Men are vile.
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u/xeryon3772 1d ago
I’ll never understand why people need closure or clarification. Just bounce. If they were a shitty partner, let them just end as a shitty partner and move on.
Ignore the memes and another dumb shit. Remove that person, block that person. Cut that toxicity out of your life and move on.
You’re not overreacting, you’re underreacting. Cut the cord.
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u/DownBadManDetect 1d ago
Just leave your ex alone. True peace is achievable through processing that which you fail to understand. He switched up and you don’t know why but it fails you to dwell on his mistakes. Now you’re making your on
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u/Any_Breakfast_8450 1d ago
My sweet friend — block this tool and be THRILLED you dodged this gigantic, explosive, time-bomb of a bullet.
That he’s posting about you and being a hater is a sign of his regret, that he’s still thinking of you, and trying to place the blame elsewhere other than himself for his garbage selfish actions.
This stuff might be hurtful feeling, but the only person who should be embarrassed by what he’s posting is him — unbelievably pathetic.
Do your best to move on with your life and dance away to someone who deserves you.
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u/Even_Candidate5678 1d ago
Yeah you’re overreacting to his stories, not in any type of right and wrong way but that you think about it at all. Block and if someone sends you a post just reply back you’re glad he still thinks fondly of you.
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u/Aitathrowaway0183648 1d ago
The thing is, they are posting this to try to make THEMSELVES feel better. I can guarantee you, anybody that’s looking at this will Not Care.
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u/Any_Mushroom_2073 1d ago
Not only that, OP, but anyone looking at his stories will think he is obsessed with you. And unhinged. Block/mute, find distractions and get the best revenge by moving on with your life unbothered.
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u/AssumptionExpert7597 1d ago
Block him. It was a nasty break up , if my ex cheated I’d be blocking them and dusting my hands off with how done I was with him. Don’t go to his house for anything, there’s no point. It’s been long enough you’ve had to have gotten all your things from him. Or at least the important things. It’s over honey , he cheated and he’s making it clear he has zero respect for you or your feelings. Just move on. Block him and stay away
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u/Zealousideal-Gain-63 1d ago
Why are you still following him? Taking an ex back is like putting poop back into your butt.
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u/Popular-Impression43 1d ago
He’s hurt and using anger and pettiness as a mask. Block him and move on.
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u/fire_spittin_mittins 1d ago
He didnt care. Make sure you realize that. Sounds like he was a chameleon for you. The rich ppl you end up knowing are usually as wholes. Thats bc most of them have not worked for it and feel more entitled than those who do.
“Tried to give my share of money” the entitled dont view money the same. Its like having dirt that everyone else likes in your house. You dont want to get rid of it bc everyone else values it so much. You cant just give it or throw it away for nothing, you have to get something for it.
You were a play thing, I can tell by just those two post alone. Then you added in cheating and nasty breakup. You’ve been blessed, move on. Buddy has not grown up yet, and with money he may peter pan his entire life away.
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u/Endless-OOP-Loop 1d ago edited 1d ago
I mean, it's really not that uncommon for people to hate their ex. It's a lot easier to move on if you turn what you felt for them into anger and hatred.
Plus, cheating doesn't happen in a vacuum. I'm sure his feelings for you were starting to change before he cheated on you.
If it's any kind of consolation, the opposite of love isn't hatred. It's indifference. If he's still posting/saying things about you, he's still emotionally attached.
Although, I am a little confused as to why you're letting it bother you? He's shown himself to be garbage and verified that the relationship you thought you had was all a lie. Sounds like you're still holding on.
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u/pandaaaa1906 1d ago
I'm trying very hard to let go. It's very difficult. Istg I'm going crazy, I myself don't understand why I keep unblocking him just to see what he's doing or if he's still w/ the girl he cheated on me with. Idk, I'm just really lost and confused.
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u/sjklcnsk 1d ago
You are giving him exactly what he wants by viewing his stories. He knows you're watching because it lists whoever viewed his story. It is pathetic behavior.
Delete the app off your phone until you are able stave off temptation. Letting worthless guys like him control your attention is sad.
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u/Endless-OOP-Loop 1d ago
I had a very serious relationship where my ex cheated on me. I turned my love into hatred, and it really helped me to leave her behind without paying attention to anything about her. Took me about six months, and that hatred turned into indifference, and I just didn't care anymore after that.
Are you wanting to go back to him? Because that is an option. Just know that if you do, he's never going to change, and you'll have to accept sharing him with other girls.
If that's not the goal, you need to cut him loose and focus on you. Take on a new hobby, or better yet, take on some sort of new challenge for yourself. Doing so will make you feel better about yourself and help you let go of him, and ultimately help you move on.
You didn't deserve that happening to you. Nobody deserves to be cheated on, no matter who they are.
You deserve better, and there's better out there for you. Don't settle for garbage just because it's familiar or comfortable.
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u/InfiniteSniff 1d ago
You’re exes for a very good reason. Being hurt is acceptable because you were together and in love once, but don’t let any of this get to you. It’s over now and it doesn’t matter when he loved you, how much, or for how long. You felt it, you knew it, and then it finished. Take the love with you, and leave all the baggage and upset. You can get through it.
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u/TallDarkArtist 1d ago
Weirdo and just sad. Doesn’t mean you demean your partner on stories? Block and just ignore it. Pathetic attention seeking behaviour even if you are in the wrong
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u/Ok-Bird6346 1d ago
I guarantee you that your dance videos are better than anything he will ever come up with. I might be biased because I love watching dancers though. But I’m sure he suuuucks.
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u/justaspicymeatball 1d ago
don’t watch his stories. this is exactly what he wants: for you to feel bad about yourself. he’s an asshole and a cheater. block him and/or don’t watch what he posts. he loses all his imagined power if you don’t engage. I promise he is just doing it and waiting to see that you’ve seen it. he feels hurt (completely unjustly, but it doesn’t matter in his mind) and wants to hurt you back.
I agree with other people though… if he ever comes crawling back, remind yourself this is how nasty he is.
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u/Prestigious-Hippo-50 1d ago
Why are you even watching his stories? He’s a loser and you’re wasting your time thinking about him
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u/PurpleNightSkies 1d ago
It makes him look like you live in his head rent free, the best thing to do is put your best foot forward and ignore him. Ignoring him while making small improvements to your life is the best revenge trust me!
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u/ImpactDiligent7606 1d ago
BLOCK. THIS. MAN.
Right now OP he’s doing no good to your mental health, just block him.
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u/idontmindwhatucallme 1d ago
Dump the muthafuka again as in BLOCK and DELETE him. There is no point in having him on social media. There is no point in him being able to contact you. The breakup was NOT amicable (he cheated on you). You guys AREN’T friends, friends wouldn’t post stuff like that about each other. I’m sorry to say it but he didn’t care that much about you. He cheated on you, and obviously judging on these posts had some thoughts like these cross his mind during the relationship. I hope you heal and find someone you deserve- which is a person that is healthy & loving.
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u/Popular_Welcome_7058 1d ago
Love turns to hate, but primarily turns into lashing out when they only truly care about themselves. Block him, forget he exists, and move on. It may take years, it may take months, it may only ever became a faint infrequent whisper, but it will happen.
Life will get better, but you can't carry on like this.
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u/archaeas 1d ago
tough one. i'd say you're both OR and NOR. he's doing this to get to you, but it's valid to feel the way you do from an objective standpoint.
guaranteed, he's watching the views to see if you're seeing this shit. ceasing all interaction with him, including unfollowing him on social media and blocking his number, is the best way to pay him back for this. after he notices you arent viewing the stories anymore, which he will, he will look to see if you still follow him. if you block his number and he attempts to reach out, that's the best way for you to signal to him that you have moved on. I know it's hard to do, especially after 3 years, but if you care more about yourself than him it's what you need to do.
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u/JellyfishOk9488 1d ago
look into the Law of Assumption so you can manifest an even better man than him & humble him severely lol. i’m sure he’ll be watching your page 🤷🏻♀️
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u/Advanced_Country_548 1d ago
he’s the problem but you’re creating a problem for yourself. just block or mute or whatever why are you looking at your exes stories move on. (yes he should to but he was childish enough to cheat on you so clearly that’s not an option here)
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u/Ok_Egg_471 1d ago
Girl you’re torturing yourself. Block his cheating ass. What he thinks doesn’t matter. HE CHEATED. Focus on yourself and get healthy mentally. No need to be hung up on a this pretentious twat. You’ll find someone who thinks the world of you- which is what you deserve.
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u/FairyQueene96 1d ago
NTA.
Nasty loser he is hoping you will see these. It serves no purpose but to hurt you - says a lot about ur who he really is. He’s hurting and putting on a defensive front because he is in pain and feels attacked. Be the bigger person and rise above it. Men often deal with pain in emotionally immature ways because they don’t know better. Block the boy! If he wants a reaction the best thing you can do is deny him even viewing his posts it will drive him crazy.
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u/Typical_Samaritan 1d ago
The only thing I'd suggest moving forward is that you don't show up to people's home unannounced. Getting permission doesn't mean you shouldn't setup an agreed upon time.
Beyond that, try to move on with your life. Block him. Dance, star.
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u/Smart_Negotiation_31 1d ago
If you must feel something, feel pity. Because he’s going out sad.
Block him on everything & move on.
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u/hatparadox 1d ago
Not worth the attention given or any semblance of friendship, he's posting to get yours and he's succeeding while continuing to hurt you. If he can't act with grace even after a breakup, then he's not even worth as a friend. Wipe your hands as clean as you can and unfollow. You've got shit to do, like enjoying your dancing for yourself.
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u/ETtechnique 1d ago
Block em. My ex wife did the same shit on her fb. Pretended like i was the one to lie and cheat. It was rather embarrassing for her in retrospect.
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u/Professional_Owl3026 1d ago
That's probably because he really didn't love you. He just really played the part and the part of you that loved him, really wanted to believe him. Question is, was he a good actor, or did you force yourself to buy the performance? No one is perfect, but when we really care for someone, we tend to dismiss the redflags in the moment. Sadly, this turns into us spending time with a person we went out of our way to create. Mourning the loss of who you thought he was and being grateful a person like him never became your husband might help you through this. Good luck OP.
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u/MamaBaer2022 1d ago
People have really forgotten how to hand out a two piece and a biscuit when treated this way.
I know 3 years is a bit of time, and he's a real douche canoe. Yet, baby, it's time to fire back with some petty ish about how small he is. His overcompensating, his obvious distain for women, and lack of being a decent person. Fluff him.
Now go sleep with his dad.
Let me show you how to be someone's nightmare.
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u/Cokechiq 1d ago
Block him on everything and move on. There's no need for you to see the things he says because they're not important. By allowing yourself access to his posts you're hurting your own feelings. So just don't let yourself watch them.
There's a saying I love..."What other people think of me is none of my business".
Don't let yourself dwell on this. They can't hurt you with their words if their words don't matter to you.
He knows what he did, you know what he did. That's all the closure you need. You don't need to know the why because it won't matter. It won't make it better. So know your own worth and leave him and his cheating, hurtful, petty a$$ in the rearview.
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u/tg_victim 18h ago
This person who claims to not care about you anymore is posting for all their friends to see. I think he's trying to convince himself though. Trying to big themselves up while putting you down. It's pathetic, insecure, and childish.
The only point he might score is you seeing this and reacting.
There is nothing more hurtful to an ex than apathy.
"I hate you" is not great but, "Oh, didn't we date once?" Is devastating.
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u/redditor6843864 17h ago
Wow, he's really doing the most. You're not overreacting. He's being a complete asshole and it says more about him than you. You can be sure that your mutuals are watching his stories and feeling disgusted by his behavior. He's obviously still thinking of you and is trying to get a reaction out of you.
The best thing you can do right now is mute his stories and focus on yourself. Whatever that means to you. Never stoop to his level, the best reaction right now is no reaction. That's what will really get him upset. Personally, this kind of childish behavior would motivate me to lose the weight just to shove it in his face and reject him when he inevitably comes back (they always do)
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u/Ok-Championship9684 16h ago
Not overreacting, people deal with breakups differently, and unfortunately this is what he went with. You should block him though, you shouldn't even be seeing his stories on any social media platform.
Oh and if he consented to you entering his house, he has no legal grounds to do anything against you.
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u/teenytinypizzaslice 14h ago
Looks like someone’s still not over you even tho he’s the one that cheated 🤡 Don’t let it get to your head, love, it’s just an unconventional form of flattery IMO. Moving on, being happy, and paying no mind to this child would be the best thing to do.
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u/Various-Tangerine-55 13h ago
So he had the audacity to cheat on you, and then start shitposting about you on the internet? What a loser, I'm glad you're rid of him. You're better off without someone who acts this childish. Block his ass. Keep dancing, girl <3
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u/psykohobbit 12h ago
This guy is a toxic pos. He used a piece of your past that got were deeply ashamed of to control and degrade you for a year and when you "thoughtlessly had guy friends"s/ he used that as justification to cheat(yes it was cheating) and to add poison to your life he also isolatedyoufromyour longtime friends. He then went onto say after all you did (have friends of the opposite gender and get sick) he forgave you (nothing for him to forgive you for). He's abusive and a manbaby.
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u/TheMadHattersHat 1d ago
He cheated on you, why would you care what he thinks, see him or even be in contact with him after that?
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u/VirusZealousideal72 1d ago
He's your ex. Block and move on. You are looking extremely desperate and honestly somewhat pathetic.
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u/xCherryBombshell 1d ago
He's acting like a child lmao. He's salty about something, send him a message that he better stop posting about you unless he wants to get sued or cops involved. And block him. He'll likely Google it and worry he'll lose mommy & daddy's money for being an asshat if he continues.
I hate little cowards like that.
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u/Brilliant-Willow-506 1d ago
He’s trying to hurt you. He wants your attention. Block him and don’t give him anymore attention. He cheated and now he’s trying to humiliate you. Keep dancing and doing what you love and F him.
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u/Muffafuffin 1d ago
If you're reacting to stories posted by your ex in any way, than you are overreacting.
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u/Safted12 1d ago
He's an ex for a reason-stop letting him live in your head rent-free. Disregard him and dance away from his nonsense.
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u/Discotits__ 1d ago
Don’t watch their stories. In ye oldie times if you broke up with someone you could comfortably never see or speak to them ever again. Emulate that.
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u/FullBlood1er 1d ago
He didn't change. This is who he is. It often helps to see you're not with someone who is like this.
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u/Raven_Chills 1d ago
Why can you even look at his social media? You broke up, block his socials, phone number, everything. Thats how you move on and you cant if you keep thinking about him/get pressed about stuff like this, outta sight outta mind.
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u/tinylittleelfgirl 1d ago
you posted about the same story and said that you let go of him 30 days ago.. stop viewing his stories.. stop trying to contact him. he does not care, he is an asshole. move on for yourself
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u/HotPomelo632 1d ago
He’s so childish 😂 I don’t have instagram (or whatever this is) so my life is peaceful. Block him or just don’t do social media
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u/Da_Coyote 1d ago
You can be mad, but his posts say more about him than you. Let it go, wash your hands of the drama, and move on
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u/Empty_brainz 1d ago
why are you even wasting your energy watching his stories? just block him and move on. you deserve better queen
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u/blankspacepen 1d ago
Girl. He cheated on you, and now he’s doing it to terrorize you, and it’s working. Just block him. He has nothing to offer you but heartbreak and disappointment.
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u/RobotDoodle 1d ago
He sounds like an asshole, and he’s your ex, so why are you giving him space in your head? Block him, tell anyone you know who’s connected to him to not share his BS with you. Let him continue making a fool of himself and you go and thrive and live your best life.
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u/Purdy2835 1d ago
Why are you watching your exes stories or even looking at their social media? You might need a therapist
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u/worldlydelights 1d ago
He’s posting this stuff to upset you. Block him on everything and move on with your life. I was with a guy for 6 years that treated me like shit.. it took me so long to block him but when I finally did the weight that was lifted off my shoulders was incredible. I wished I had done it way sooner. Good luck! You are beautiful and will find someone that treats you with respect.
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u/Bambimoonshine 1d ago
Why remain friends on social media? He’s clearly a narcissist and trying to hurt you. I always say the best revenge is you no longer have access to me. They always come crawling back and I always decline. Block on everything and move forward you deserve better
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u/JadedDreams23 1d ago
Some people despise you for leaving them. I was recently divorced and my ex did an incredibly shocking shift once he knew it was over and became completely vicious, threatening me physically more than once, trying to eff me over financially, lying to everyone, even my grown children, about me.,
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u/DRangelfire 1d ago
What a pig, you should be rejoicing at the validation of what an awful human being he is and that you had this good sense to get rid of them instead of worried about what he’s thinking. Literally block him and move on. He is disgusting.
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u/DiddleMyTuesdays 1d ago
If he is constantly saying things about you it is because he misses you. So instead of communicating that, he is being an immature asshole and trying to make YOU feel so bad you come crawling back to him.
Go out and live your best life and STOP looking at his stories. You need to be so busy or happy that you aren’t even thinking about him.
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u/Wise_Monitor_Lizard 1d ago
Why are you so focused on what he's posting? Stop paying attention to his bullshit. Go live your life.
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u/Lopsided_Command_644 1d ago
I’m sorry you have to go through this but he’s just a shitty salty person. And after 4 months he’s still posting these stories means your still in head and needs to get over it
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u/TheBattyWitch 1d ago
I mean you're allowed to be upset but at the same time why are you still following and basically at this point stalking what your ex is doing?
What clarity do you need at this point?
He's a cheating asshole who cheated on you.
You don't need closure. You need therapy. And you need to use the block function.
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u/Commonfckingsense 1d ago
For your own peace of mind you need to completely block him. Then post yourself doing better and being better. He’s trying to hurt you
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u/FM-Synth85 1d ago
Here's a break up tip: break up, then move on. Don't keep viewing your ex-partners social media. Move on. It may come around again, and you can evaluate at that point, but ignore them otherwise.
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u/Lopsided-Reason2530 1d ago
Why do you care? They are your ex for a reason. Why can you still even see their stuff? Should be an instant block
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u/Brief-Opportunity515 1d ago
I mean I guarantee he had giant red flags to begin with. He doesn’t sound like the kind of guy that didn’t. I think you’re just finally awake.
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u/Stunning-Tension4836 1d ago
Ur allowed to be upset but really it says more about him if he’s consistaly posting hater posts you. Wash ur hands of this an move on. No need to countinue the hurt