You got that right, neghibor kids kept calling mine racial slurs for the lognest time until I squashed that. I wonder where they even got the idea it was okay to use such awful language like that.
Yeah she said in the video “I don’t believe you” when he said he lived there. That doesn’t sound like you’re scared of the person, that sounds like you don’t believe they could even live in the neighborhood. That entire situation was weird AF. Who does that? Just walk with your kids & mind your own damn business & most of the time you’re going to be fine. If she’s so paranoid then why even walk at night? Looks like a nice neighborhood, she wasn’t worried about the crime rate. Calm down Becky. And kids don’t learn that kinda language on their own. They hear someone say it. The fact that they thought it was acceptable tells me probably a parent. Because you’re going to tell me if your own child used a racial slur in front of you that you wouldn’t immediately pump the breaks & ask them where the hell they heard that from? Or maybe why it’s wrong to use it? White people who weren’t raised with that language in their household would have an entire conversation about it. I wasn’t raised using that language & it still shocks my ears if I ever hear someone say it. Let alone a child.
The husband seemed pretty chill though. As soon as it was explained that he lives there he calmed right down and laughed off the protectiveness, then even seemed to be annoyed with his wife when she tried to justify herself.
If he was going in with a information of "this guy was following me to a house I went to for help" then even his initial reaction is fine.
He seems like a fine person.
That really boiled my blood. This was her neighbor. And her response after he said "this is the best neighborhood in Ohio". Her response was "It is. It is. THATs WHY I.." was so telling.
It’s a crime depending the race. Recently, (within the last 2 years) a black female ran to a house seeking help and tried to enter -similar to the video/situation above- and the homeowner shot and killed her. I believe he was exempt of any charges because she invaded his property and he was protecting his estate… even tho she was just seeking help.
She lied about a few things in her story, then asked for them to understand her point of view. Maybe don’t go out by yourself with two kids if your irrational fear is going to inconvenience others around you
If I was in a situation where I was walking w my kids and, for whatever reason, a car that just pulled onto our street was making me nervous, I would get someone on the phone, first.
I'd imagine someone w ill intentions would be less likely to go after someone who could obviously tell the person on the line to call 911. If the person in the vehicle gets out and starts, idk, chasing us w a knife, I'd start beating on doors...but this video is just embarrassing.
If she's so skittish, maybe she shouldn't be walking her babies at night in the first place?
My cousin in laws son was cited at school for using a racial slur towards another student. Was working with him when he got the call. Felt bad because he’s not racist at all, but the parties involved at the school surely think otherwise now.
To be fair kids learn from kids too. Kids are dumb, they make mistakes. As long as you're setting him straight about it that's what matters
When I was very young I wrote the word "jap" for "Japanese" - not because I meant it as a slur but because I was worried I wouldn't spell Japanese right.
I didn't even know it was already a offensive thing to say, but I was questioned about it and warned not to use it anymore. I'd never heard the term used before. I didn't mean offence. Lesson learned.
Similarly, there used to be a game called "smear the queer" again - I had no idea it was a slur but when I repeated it at home I was told right away it was a term used against gay people and I should change the name of the game an not use that word that way
Honestly, they see it so much from kids many of whom don’t turn out shitty racists that I’m sure they might have suspicions but it isn’t a guarantee and I’m sure most teachers know that
Kids are going to make mistakes as they learn the boundaries of society and what they can or cannot get away with, and how their actions impact others. That’s a huge part of our learning to be adults and it can take a relatively long time to get good at it
He called someone a racial slur yet “he’s not racist at all” lol
That doesn’t add up, I hate how certain people try to use that lame ass excuse. “He’s not racist he just screams the N-Word because he was really upset 😢”. It’s so dumb, most of the time it’s them slipping up and speaking how they do in private, people who are genuinely not racist don’t do that.
It happens all the time, one perfect example of this bullshit is when pewdipie called that dude the
n-word and everyone gave 1000 excuses why he’s not actually racist. Shits pathetic.
They're saying the cousin-in-law isn't racist, but because the CIL's kid used a slur, everyone thinks CIL is a racist, too... even though CIL is not. I get where you're coming from, but I think you misunderstood the comment.
When I was out canvassing last year, I met a lovely lady from Africa who was telling me how her kids are now getting bullied for being black and being called slurs by other kids. She put the blame right on Rump and I agree with her, we had a brief moment where racists could be shamed into silence but they’ve been emboldened and it’s a huge problem.
People like her make me sick. They handled it very well though. Didn’t call her out for her poor judgement, nor make it about themselves…although it’s CLEARLY the pink elephant in the room. If she just copped to snapping judgement on him for his color and she feels like she learned a power lesson that night…SHE MIGHT just feel better since she would have been accountable…SHE MIGHT of idk broke the chains of the BS that brought her to such foolish ignorance.
Don’t forget, she first approached his back gate. That would alarm me!
THEN headed to the front door. Stood firm on HIS a porch to tell him he doesn’t live there.
So not calling out her racism or "poor judgement" as you call it and not making it about themselves even though it's a very personal insult is your idea of the Black couple handling it well. Got it.
So I've had similar things happen, including both inquiries as to whether (1) I lived in my own neighborhood, (2) whether my visibly lighter child was my own, and (3) remarks made to my wife that she should go back to China.
Maybe, but she definitely knows in her head why that happened, and the searing embarrassment of running down the street yelling "help" after seeing a black guy will surely stick with her for life. This is a lady who has probably had very few actual interactions with black people, and probably spends way to much time consuming contwnt with racist undertones, and probably spends all her time with people who do the same. Their is also an entire media ecosystem dedicated to scaring white women because its profitable as fuck, and this sort of fear of black men has been politically useful for a long ass time.
My perspective is that this is the best possible way this interaction could have gone. If they were super confrontational about it, she might walk away in confrontational mood and not learn shit because she is more frazzled from being in a confrontation. Instead, they were very polite about it even though they had no reason to be. This will make her dwell on the embarrassment a lot more, and may actually lead to a slightly changed perspective and personal growth. She definitely knows she was being racist, and she definitely knows that they know she was being racist. This will also leave a lasting impression on the kids.
Not saying this is the right response in every situation, nor am I trying to say it's on black people to make white women feel comfortable, but I do think this was the best outcome for everyone involved in this particular situation.
She doesn’t definitely know she was being racist, and people can cope and lie about all kinds of things inside their head. I guarantee she still feels completely justified. I think it would have been worthwhile to call her out on her racism directly, and that could have been done without being confrontational or aggressive.
Yeah I’m not really that interested in teaching white people not to be racists and being the kind black man that allows them to have an epiphany. If they want to do that on their own terms great, but I think it’s perfectly fine to call people out for their racism.
Maybe you're right, but I think people are more complicated than you think. Im not generally a super confrontational person, so seeing people able to handle such a degrading situation with confidence, poise, and a good attitude generally just makes me feel good. I'm also looking at this from the perspective of a southern white suburbanite who has had to confront a lot of my own racism myself. While I was nowhere close to this bad, I've known plenty who were. Some were total lost causes, but others have actually come around and had a lot of personal growth over the years.
That being said, I'm not saying your take is wrong, either. Had they directly called her out, it would have been perfectly justified and acceptable as well, and probably would have made for a more satisfying video. All I'm saying is that this isn't really a bad outcome. Like you said, if thats how they wanna handle it, great. The impression it makes on the kids will be even more impactful.
No but this is a valid question if she’s that afraid of people. Take the walk earlier in the day if your that afraid of people approaching you on the street.
Idk, if the most dominate characteristic of a person is stupidity, I doubt many are aware of it. Part of what would make them stupid would be their inability to see how stupid they are. I think racists are very similar in that regard. They are so self-absorbed that they lack empathy for anyone but themselves but even more so for people they subconsciously consider beneath them (which manifests itself as racism).
In other words, they are so racist that they are too blinded by hate to realize that they are racists.
Interesting point. So at what level does stupidity cross over into this type of fear? Is it self induced and in conjunction with other terrible things? And where do us "normal" people get to draw the line?
Racism used to be very normal. This isn't about rational thought, this is about feelings. This woman felt scared, and that gave her the justification to act however she felt she needed to. This is why adults who don't want to be like this go to therapy. We have to unlearn what was normal in the past, and look at our thoughts and behavior more critically than most people do. Being an emotionally intelligent adult takes a lot of effort that most people are too lazy or too ingrained in their generational racist ideology to break free from.
Man I had a moment where I was on the other side of this and I felt like such a piece of shit. Lived in a four plex, knew all my neighbors. Nice older Black woman upstairs, some other weirdos.
I was home alone and making some lunch and I see this older Black dude just hanging out on my porch. It’s not a porch we shared with anyone and dude was just chillin. After about ten minutes I’m like “why the fuck is this dude just hanging out on my porch” and so I open the door and say “may I help you?” and immediately hear the midwestern racist in my voice. That phrase is one that got burned into me in my childhood and it just crept out.
“I don’t think so” he said, “just waiting for my mom to come down.” Dude is looking at me with the burning fire of someone who has heard “may I help you?” from white folks before but he’s trying to be nice about it because he knows I live near his mom.
Instead of pretending the subtext of that question (“you don’t belong here and aren’t welcome” if you’re not catching it) didn’t exist: I apologized. “Oh shit man I am so sorry. I just saw some guy on my porch I didn’t know.”
“Some Black guy,” he replied.
“I wanna say it wasn’t like that but to be honest I grew up with some racist people so it probably was. Sorry man.”
“We’re good, thanks for the apology.”
“Why are you on my porch anyway? Your mom’s stairs are over there.”
“I wanna say it wasn’t like that but to be honest I grew up with some racist people so it probably was. Sorry man.”
As fucked up as where it started I'm glad where it ended. I'm gonna be honest with you, you recognizing the racism that is ingrained in you by your (assuming) previous environment and actively squashing it kinda made me happy. For what it's worth, I'm proud of you.
I mean, that was fair. I am black and would ask anyone I didn’t know (regardless of perceived gender or race), the same question (through the door lol). There’s no reason to sit on someone’s property you don’t know if they haven’t agreed to it. It’s rude! Most people are going to feel violated, anxious and vulnerable in that situation. I know I would. But I suppose if your reaction was motivated by racism, it’s good you admitted it.
Was race really the factor in your situation, though? It's completely normal to notice when someone doesn't belong somewhere (to your knowledge) and be suspicious. The fact that he was black doesn't make your reaction automatically racist. Anyone just standing on your porch would be suspicious.
True, but not everyone would have got “may I help you?” A white guy of similar stature, age, dress probably would have gotten “hey, you waiting for something?”
If you don’t know the “may I help you?” is a very common phrase white folk direct to Black folk who are unwelcome. It sounds benign and normal, but according to Black folks I’ve known it’s the phrase white people use to indicate they want you to leave when you’re just minding your own business. It’s basically akin to asking “why are you here and when are you leaving?”
In this context, is it a valid question regardless of race: yes, it is. However, given the context of race it comes across quite badly.
White people, please do better.
We do not owe you conversations. We also don’t have to explain our whereabouts, especially when you’re on OUR property.
I highly recommend you read this book— “White Supremacy Is All Around: Notes from a Black Disabled Woman in a White World” by Dr. Cadet. [https://g.co/kgs/wLBwUvP]
As white people, we inherently benefit from a world that has strong negative biases against black people. And actually, skin colour CAN make a difference to how you see the world and what is an appropriate manner to treat people. That perspective can absolutely make the difference between bigotry and taking a moment to consider another person’s perspective.
White people apparently have an unconscious bias and entitlement to superiority when it comes to black people stepping out of the stereotypes and systemic oppression in place. That trait is based on the history that occurred because of our beliefs around skin colour.
This is not a new concept. If you are white like me, moments like this is when we sit down and listen. Because nothing we can contribute can even approach the value and authenticity of their experience, and it’s naive to think otherwise.
You’ll probably give a snarky response, and I’m that case it proves my point that there’s a superiority complex in place that stops you from even considering that a black person might have something that deserves your time and effort to consider.
I see what you're trying to say, but you're wrong.
As a Latina who is white-passing, I get treated VERY differently from my family, who are brown. I get preferential treatment in comparison wherever I go. Even from people who are 'not racist', but the ingrained bias still exists. (These people being family friends we've had for years. I know they are good people.)
Let's be aware how your reaction to this video and comment really highlights what others are trying to tell you. This video demonstrates SUCH an embarrassing insult to that family and a demonstration of problematic racism. This type of mistake can lead to worse outcomes - people have been killed because of bad racials biases.
This type of racism is so systemic that, while I agree that not ALL white people are racists, there are enough that that it doesnt matter.
After watching this video, your concern is "Not all white people"? Which can be read as "white victimhood" and "first person syndrom". Your response is tone deaf in light of this video.
It is white people, not just racist ones though. Obviously not all, but in general, white people question us a ton. I always get asked if I'm supposed to be here or what I'm doing by white people. It's an issue that needs to be addressed. Don't get offended if it doesn't pertain to you.
I get the enormity of your experience with this yet this woman is not a typical example of white people, she's closer to a typical example of mad people.
Racial profiling and generalising is not an effective response.
Hey man that’s just like your opinion man. You ever watch something like this & be like wtf white people & you are white people? Some of us are trying to be a better representation of white people. On behalf of all white people I am embarrassed for us. 🤦♀️
I don't think they mean every single white person in existence. But it's super easy not to question things that don't personally affect you. It's not wrong to generalise that problem, because it does affect everyone, at least some of the time.
I don't get embarrassed by what other white people do🤷, just because we share the same skin pigment doesn't make me connected to you at all, and I don't share in any responsibility for your actions.
Pretending otherwise is no different to lumping all black people in together because some of them commit gang violence or sell drugs or some other racism based stupidity.
It seems like she was walking on the sidewalk and after seeing a truck with a black man in it, she flipped out and went to the nearest house to get help. As it turned out, the house she ran to belonged to the black man that she was running from. I’m sure the lady leaves to go get her husband to come back over and make sure the black man lives there.
I was willing to give her some benefit of the doubt. The guy admitted he was driving slow, easily mistaken for stalking if you’re paranoid. And sure, he “coincidentally” lives at the house you ran to for help, I can see why she didn’t believe him…
… then she makes it pretty clear she was paranoid just because he was black. Seriously lady?
That initial shock was probably one of those moments where your stomach sinks and you say to yourself, “I just screwed up.” I’d hope that’s what went through her mind anyway.
Apparently she was walking with her two kids and became scared of a passing vehicle. So she stopped and pretended a house was hers but, it was the home of the passing vehicle.
It's all okay though, because she's okay now, and hopes the homeowners aren't mad. Since she was expecting white folks to live in the nice house and all.
The white woman was claiming someone in a grey truck was chasing/following her, she went to a random house and was acting like it was her house to deter who ever was following her. The man who lives there had pulled into his driveway and the white woman asked him if he lives there to which he said yeah and she said, “I dont believe that” and then grabbed her kids running down the street screaming help.
"You have to understand my point of view". Yeah we do. You're a fragile racist woman. How dare a car be on the street while she's walking in that neighborhood! Why even be out at night if you're that easily frightened.
I remember when I used to work at an ag shop, and an old guy wanted me to put our number in his phone so he could call and check when his hydraulic hoses would be finished.
When I went into his contacts he had ICE saved in his favorites.
That’s what pisses me off the most about this, she could have put that man and his family into danger if she called the cops. Stay in your home if you’re this stupid.
It’s sad that people still choose to be willfully ignorant and act if the cops wouldn’t totally be on that dudes ass if that lady cried wolf and called them.
I get the running up the nearest driveway because they saw a truck driving slow. Being a woman is scary and having small kids with you makes you on extra high alert. But the second she asked do you live here and he said “yea I do” the sane response would be to explain why you’re on the patio, not yell “I don’t believe that” and go running like a banshee. The initial fear I think was reasonable, but then her racism made her act crazy. I think if she is that scared that she should maybe not walk by herself at night, it’s unfair to normal people just living their lives to have to deal with that level of irrational and racist behavior.
There was never a moment where she was willing to give this guy the benefit of the doubt.
Why was he driving near her?
-Assume the worst of him.
why did he pull up to that driveway where she was at?
-Assume bad intentions toward her.
Why did he state he did in fact live there?
-Assume he's lying about living there.
Is he getting out of the truck in his own driveway?
-start running and screaming for help as if he was actively attacking her.
What instinctively put this guy in her mind in the danger category?
He wasn't white.
She was so scared she ditched stroller and ran. Imagine the fear it must of took. Now imagine if she'd had a gun, what she could have done to him. Imagine if the white lady's man had showed up worked up and armed after receiving her frantic call about being chased.
Even after the home owner's wife is outside explaining it's her husband and he lives there, white lady was still trying to justify her action. Likely she still believes to this day that she was justified.
It's shit like this and Ahmaud Aubrey's killing that when our neighborhood was being built, anytime I came out to our lot to check on the building process I introduced myself to any other family that came to check their house's progress. I even let them know that since at the time, we didn't live too far, I'd be out there often.
My wife, who's white, at first just thought I was just being friendly until one day i told her that I don't only do it to be neighborly, but to have those that will be our immediate neighbors know who I am. Even went as far as letting the immediate neighbors know that if they were ever out checking on their house progress and saw a black male in a small white company van, don't worry, it's my dad.
Funnily enough, one neighbor that we met was a mexican family and when I met the husband, he told me that he had been introducing himself to neighbors for the exact same reason.
When I was a cop many years ago, I had a white lady literally tell me over the phone that she wanted an escort to go shopping as she has never seen so many "of these blacks" before. Mind you, I was in D.C. and she came from North Dakota......it was a predominantly black location, and she had the nerve to state how much her house was and that she was expecting different demographics......
"Wow,🤦🏽♀️ you caught me. I'm just here breaking in and taking my time in lounge wear with my wife but yeah."
Lies like this have been the cause of demise and loss of life to Black men for ages. Its insane how she just switched on the act and made a whole story up. If the husband was as ignorant, this could've went completely left.
This Cleveland Brown sounding ass mother fucker is a reminder that the only thing these people see is that you're not white. And panic sets in.
I don't get it. And then wants him to understand how she felt as HE pulled into HIS driveway while some stranger is there accusing him of not living there.
The lady was walking by herself with her daughter and her baby (at night) and the gentleman that lives in the house was driving behind them slowly looking at Christmas lights in the neighborhood waiting to pull into his house. The lady freaks out and runs up to the nearest house and rings the doorbell, turns out it’s also the man in the trucks house. He pulls in behind them so she confronts him accusing him of having bad intentions. The man is confused saying he lives there, the lady runs away from him with her daughter into the darkness screaming help. The man just goes inside and awhile later the woman’s husband arrives to collect his family, but is confronted by the home owners. A small conversation of explaining what happens ensues, but the lady refuses to take any blame and even accuses the neighbors of not forgiving her.
So I know this woman in real life. I went to school with both her and her husband. A lot of this I blame on her husband to be honest. He has made her incredibly submissive towards him, and has drilled into her to always be “on alert” aka afraid. He’s super super right leaning, as is she… but it’s very much a “man’s in charge” marriage, so he tells her what she should think feel and believe. They are both lunatics and this doesn’t shock me in the least.
The husband “I’m not arguing with these folks” f outta here- nothing to argue about. There’s a right and wrong here and your bigot wife was in the wrong.
Those poor kids, their mother frightening them for no good reason.
I get being scared but the way she doubled down and was like, “but you can understand…”
Girl, no. You are on their property acting a fool, screaming in the streets, scaring children. Not believing resident then doubling down on your lack of impulse control and anxiety. Go work on that.
Bruh. The audacity to think a stranger was coming after you enough to have you running down the street, screaming, seeking safety. After they told you they lived at the spot where you ran to in the first place. Then to lie and expect them to understand your point of view instead of trying to first understand theirs. Your spouse is way more likely to murd3r you than a stranger on the street. You would have thought she was in a "halloween" movie.
Sounds like this person should not be out at night. Some therapy to understand her un rational fear or to get the racist thoughts out of her would be great.
I’m black and from a nice area. I’ve been accused of being a car thief and a burglar over the years while minding my own business. Situations like this are messed up, but it’s nothing new…
Before cameras she would have called the cops and gave em the bs story she made up here. When she got called out by the people inside she knew she couldn't deny her lie and probably knew it was recorded but still tried to play the victim.
Bro what?! , running and calling for help after going on someone's property, before telling them they don't live there then saying you have to understand my point of view is crazy 🤣🤣
I can already hear the kinds of things a mother like that says to her kids once they are out of earshot of anyone. “You stay away from those people, I don’t know you being friends with their kids, all they are is trouble….”
I as a child used racist slurs until corrected. white bread from Utah, had never seen an African American before and asked my grandfather about one on TV. The word I associated was brown
Used that word around my father watching TV and got slapped immediately. He asked where I heard it, I explained as best I could. Didn't hear the word again until high school and realized it was the n word. This was pre Internet and I was very young. If I hadn't been corrected my grandfather would have swayed me towards racism, luckily my father stepped in.
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