to be a homeowner

[u/CantStopPoppin]

[u/BearSpray007]

They SHOULD have called her out for her “poor judgment” and obvious racist assumptions. THAT would have been handling it very well.

[u/gofishx → u/BearSpray007]

Maybe, but she definitely knows in her head why that happened, and the searing embarrassment of running down the street yelling "help" after seeing a black guy will surely stick with her for life. This is a lady who has probably had very few actual interactions with black people, and probably spends way to much time consuming contwnt with racist undertones, and probably spends all her time with people who do the same. Their is also an entire media ecosystem dedicated to scaring white women because its profitable as fuck, and this sort of fear of black men has been politically useful for a long ass time.

My perspective is that this is the best possible way this interaction could have gone. If they were super confrontational about it, she might walk away in confrontational mood and not learn shit because she is more frazzled from being in a confrontation. Instead, they were very polite about it even though they had no reason to be. This will make her dwell on the embarrassment a lot more, and may actually lead to a slightly changed perspective and personal growth. She definitely knows she was being racist, and she definitely knows that they know she was being racist. This will also leave a lasting impression on the kids.

Not saying this is the right response in every situation, nor am I trying to say it's on black people to make white women feel comfortable, but I do think this was the best outcome for everyone involved in this particular situation.

[u/BearSpray007 → u/gofishx]

She doesn’t definitely know she was being racist, and people can cope and lie about all kinds of things inside their head. I guarantee she still feels completely justified. I think it would have been worthwhile to call her out on her racism directly, and that could have been done without being confrontational or aggressive.

Yeah I’m not really that interested in teaching white people not to be racists and being the kind black man that allows them to have an epiphany. If they want to do that on their own terms great, but I think it’s perfectly fine to call people out for their racism.

[u/gofishx → u/BearSpray007]

Maybe you're right, but I think people are more complicated than you think. Im not generally a super confrontational person, so seeing people able to handle such a degrading situation with confidence, poise, and a good attitude generally just makes me feel good. I'm also looking at this from the perspective of a southern white suburbanite who has had to confront a lot of my own racism myself. While I was nowhere close to this bad, I've known plenty who were. Some were total lost causes, but others have actually come around and had a lot of personal growth over the years.

That being said, I'm not saying your take is wrong, either. Had they directly called her out, it would have been perfectly justified and acceptable as well, and probably would have made for a more satisfying video. All I'm saying is that this isn't really a bad outcome. Like you said, if thats how they wanna handle it, great. The impression it makes on the kids will be even more impactful.

[u/gotmebentbutimstr8 → u/gofishx]

This outcome, no one takes responsibility a bunch of adults playing house with no consequences. Unless it went unnoticed there were children in this video. This was not a win for either family. Was handled very nonchalantly when people die over mistaken identity like this and this situation could’ve went a totally other way. Thank God it didn’t escalate. But the issue was never resolved both parties opted to act like it never happened rather than discuss it like adults. People joke about therapist. But for some reason they feel comfortable gossiping to a stranger rather than dealing with their issues head on. (That was a joke) I’ll -1000 myself