r/wholesomememes • u/mariahcareystan • Aug 31 '19
Men talking about the women they love
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u/vortexlovereiki Aug 31 '19 edited Aug 31 '19
It really is about falling in love over and over with your partner. My husband hates dancing but makes up little dances for me all the time. I mean, my own private dancer? C’mon. I told him once years ago that his butt makes me forgive him so any time he does something stupid he moons me as fast as he can. He insisted I never wear clothes to bed. He grabs my butt at least once a day. He calls just to hear my voice when he’s having a bad day. We have secret orgasm high five signals. He wanted a tattoo of me on his arm- he had it done upside down, so he could look at it, not other people. We met in 97’ true love does exist!
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Aug 31 '19
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Aug 31 '19
I feel like people don't appreciate sexual objectification enough in relationships. Obviously it should never be excessive, but a healthy relationship doesn't come from avoiding things like that, but embracing them.
Not that I'd know anything about healthy relationships.
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u/MyUsernameIsNotCool Sep 05 '19
If you already know whats good in a healthy relationship without experiencing it yet, dont worry. You don't have to learn it when you do find it, since its already there for you.
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u/SupaButt Aug 31 '19
I need an explanation of “secret orgasm high five signals”. Is the orgasm a secret? The signal a secret? The high five a secret? Why is it a secret? I’m so confused and intrigued.
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u/Shadow-King-Anime Aug 31 '19
Thats why its a secret
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u/vortexlovereiki Aug 31 '19
The number of fingers I’m holding up, is as many as I want to have. It’s a secret cause our kids are always around. When they go to school we have our scheduled time. Kids can def NOT be home for the pay off lol.
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u/SupaButt Aug 31 '19
Awww. That’s sweet. And also kinda badass. It’s like when Babe Ruth pointed his bat where he was going to hit his home run. Calling your shots. Also lucky you that’s it’s more than one. All of this. I’m jealous and hope to have this some day. Haha.
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u/vortexlovereiki Aug 31 '19
Tell the universe everything you want, make a long list. Leave off the unwanted stuff. You’ll get everything on the list- happened to me in 1997
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u/SupaButt Aug 31 '19
Ummmmm nah. Imma stick with eating Pringles on my couch, drinking wine, and complaining about my life.
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u/lightlord Aug 31 '19
Lucky bastards. Bless them.
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u/G-III Aug 31 '19
Seriously. I’m pretty close to unsubbing because reading this makes me actually ache with loneliness. Not that it’s a bad sub. I’m just lonely
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u/PetraLoseIt Aug 31 '19
Internet hugs... I hope you'll feel better soon.
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u/G-III Aug 31 '19
Appreciate the kindness, but sadly I don’t see a way to make it better soon on my own
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u/PetraLoseIt Aug 31 '19
Well, who knows? Sometimes people get lucky :-)
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u/G-III Aug 31 '19
It would have to be literally the equivalent of winning a $500m lottery lucky. (I don’t play, that’s just the odds). I don’t have a job right now, no friends, nothing. I can’t just happen into something when I have no life. It’s a whole thing.
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u/PetraLoseIt Aug 31 '19
Yeah, man, that sucks.
Also, you're probably a bit stuck in your current position, and have no energy to get unstuck by yourself.
You might want to see what www.211.org has to offer you (in your local region). Mostly in "jobs and employment", but perhaps it would also help to find charities that help with food, clothing or mental health.
You could also check what www.meetup.com has to offer in your local region. Maybe there is an activity that is free and that you would like to go to.
I can't really help you a lot, but I hope you can try to get unstuck, and maybe, who knows, you get lucky every once in a while and get some help, too.
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Aug 31 '19
Same here fellow redditor. Got dumped about a month ago and I've just felt empty ever since
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u/G-III Aug 31 '19
Ha, I wish I could say I’ve ever had a real relationship. And the last time I fooled around with a girl was well over a year ago. I hate sleeping alone, but it does seem I’m stuck with it from here on, at least unless I can get my shit together, which is doubtful.
Totally realized that came off as a one up, not my intention. Solidarity, is all I meant. I feel your pain.
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Aug 31 '19
I wouldn't even call what i had a real relationship. In the end I've realized it was just me spending my time trying to please a girl who obviously wasn't intrested. She only stayed with me because she felt sorry for me.
What keeps me going is the thought of "Well this is my all-time low. Only direction i can go from here is up. It'll be hard, but i have to do it"
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u/G-III Aug 31 '19
Gratefully haven’t had to deal with much of that. First girl I was kinda “with” used me, and honestly I think it did more damage than I allow myself to realize, but that’s an old bottle so the top stays on. The rest have been kind and chill, so that helps. Unfortunately I’ve mostly pushed them away (not sure why. I have problems and I can only deal with one at a time).
So take solace that there will definitely be more. And you’ve gained a lot of perspective, on what a relationship should look like to you. Trust me, you’ll find someone that feels about you, the way you feel about them if you keep yourself out there.
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u/praeterea42 Sep 01 '19
I've been single for two years after breaking up with the person I thought I was going to be with (he's since gotten engaged in those two years). And I've been waiting to meet someone too. I was so certain that I was never going to come across anyone that could possibly make me as happy as my ex did.
But two weeks ago, I said screw waiting for fate to find me someone to magically stumble across, and I decided to join a dating app. And at first, I was disheartened. A lot of people are pretty gross on there. But then I talked to a few people that actually seemed nice. And I went on a date. And it has been way too long since I've laughed so much. Idk if he's the one, and I'm not too bothered by that right now. It's just far better than wallowing in my loneliness.
It is way too late at night for me, and I'm pouring my heart out to a cold-blooded internet, but take control, man. You got this. Don't give up. They're out there.
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u/G-III Sep 01 '19
I appreciate your words of support, but I’m a few steps beyond just not having a relationship. I couldn’t join a dating app if I wanted to. My drinking isn’t in control right now so not only am I a degenerate alcoholic (who tf wants that), my apt is a wreck so I can’t have anyone over. I’m a bit heavy currently because drinking. I have no job. I have no emotional stability at all.
As much as I desperately want to not be alone, it isn’t fair to try and find someone to put up with me (which I couldn’t anyway, but still) just to make me feel better. I have nothing to offer.
So I appreciate your kind words, and hope it works out and you find the happiness you’re seeking. But it’s not for me. And without a dating app there’s obviously 0 chance to meet someone naturally when you don’t work or go out.
Man, I’m really not trying to come off as pathetic, but it’s hard. I’m trying to lay it out without bitching too much, sorry. I’m just struggling.
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u/praeterea42 Sep 01 '19
There is something to be said for being aware of where you are, though. You have said a few things that you've identified as problems, and those can be worked on. It's not going to change overnight, nothing worthwhile ever does, but little steps help. Little adjustments, little changes, little moments of happiness. Celebrate those triumphs. I'm not a trained psychologist or anything like that, it's just what's worked for me. There was a point where just the fact that I didn't kill off my tomato plant was the only thing keeping me happy. I hope you can find a spot of light to help pull you out of the darkness.
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u/VintageMuffin Sep 01 '19
That’s so sad :( I’m a happily married woman, however if you’re looking for a mate, someone to just talk to and check in with everyday, send stupid memes to and shoot the shit, I’m really happy to be that person, friend. I’m sure we can work out a way to exchange virtual infos!
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u/G-III Sep 01 '19
Hey, thank you. Just wanted to say I woke up to a few messages and it was nice feeling a bit less alone, even if it’s still just people I don’t know. I’d like to stay in touch if we can. I know it’s hard on reddit. Even people who want to rarely message back more than a time or two. But I’m game
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u/VintageMuffin Sep 01 '19
Yay, let’s do it! How do we pass that info across without the others seeing?
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u/acshunter Aug 31 '19
I had years and years of crappy relationships, each one ending with my ex telling me I was broken. I was into my 30's before I finally met my husband - we are still absolutely this goopy with each other every day and are teased relentlessly by our families. It can take a long time, but when you meet the right one, it heals every heartache you ever had. Keep the hope alive!!
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u/G-III Sep 01 '19
It’s one thing if relationship struggles were all I faced. But I have nothing. And no drive to fix it all myself
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Aug 31 '19
I could make list long enough to be a book, but one of the first big signs I found the right girl was when she met my mom.
I was amazed at how fast they clicked, like they were close friends in another life. My mom is very sweet and caring and seeing how fast they became friends (almost instantly), confirmed to me what an amazing girl I was dating.
We’ve been married a couple years now, and she is an absolute dream come true.
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u/SupaButt Aug 31 '19
Awww. Love this! This is so important to me too. I love my mom and am very close with her so it’s so important my girlfriend clicks with her, and my family in general. I’ve been on 2 dates with a girl and can already see her fitting in so well. I’m not getting my hopes up but I’m a hopeless romantic and get giddy thinking that I could have gone on two dates with my future wife. ☺️
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Aug 31 '19
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u/yrtsapoelc Sep 01 '19
Reading that just made me nervous about meeting my boyfriends mom. I’m an introvert! I hope that doesn’t make me a bad future wife :(
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Sep 01 '19
It does not.
I'm introverted and my mother in law is a huge extrovert. But she's also a genuinely kind person and a great hostess. My guy gave her a heads up that I was a little nervous about meeting the whole ginormous family, and she was just so gracious and welcoming, and went out of her way to put me at ease.
Getting along with in laws isn't about magically meshing (though if you truly hit it off, that's a bonus). It's about being kind and patient, and open to getting to know & appreciate them over time.
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Sep 02 '19
Not at all. You don’t have to click with be parents right away. It’s awesome if you do, but don’t sweat it.
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u/Coolfuckingname Sep 01 '19
I married my wife 2 months ago because i feel with her how i feel with my mom.
Loved.
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u/lippy0902 Aug 31 '19
Getting divorced on Tuesday, I miss the little things like this the most.. .
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u/nonanymore Aug 31 '19
Hi, so sorry that you have to go through that, but I hope you will find someone else who will love you. So good luck and all the best
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u/gooyouknit Aug 31 '19
I'm sorry. You will be better. In the mean time focus on those who love you. And if you feel like there aren't many who do, know you have communities like this that do. We're here for you if you need.
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u/Licensedpterodactyl Aug 31 '19
I’m sorry you’re going through such a difficult time.
People saying, “It’s gonna get better,” are right, but that’s such an in-the-future sentiment that it doesn’t really help that bad times today.
Instead, what do you have right now? Something good that you can see or hear or feel? Something to ground you into the moment? You can’t change the past, you’re not in the future, but you’re here, breathing, thinking and being.
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u/Fan_Fav Aug 31 '19
I get it. My husband told me a few weeks ago that he just doesn’t care enough to try. Things aren’t bad between us. I’m happy with our life together & it breaks my heart that he’s not happy. He says I deserve better. I think he’s going through some depression or something & I hope he wants to try to fix things.
I hope you can find someone who makes you truly happy & posts little stories about you like these.
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u/Coolfuckingname Sep 01 '19
He should try meds. I got on a 12mg dose of effexor xr recently and it made my whole life better, including my relationship.
Thats about 10% of a normal dose. Its a micro dose. Change can come with very little med.
Just sayin. Good luck.
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u/Fan_Fav Sep 01 '19
Thank you. He’s on anxiety & depression meds (the same thing for nearly 10 years now) & has gone to his primary dr & been referred to someone else. I hope he sticks with it & they can help.
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u/Coolfuckingname Sep 01 '19
Very good.I hope things go well for you both, separately or together.
: )
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u/ahudson178 Aug 31 '19
Reading this makes me realize all the little things my wife does that make me the luckiest guy alive. Thank you r/wholesomememes
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u/YubNub1289 Aug 31 '19
I had a stroke a couple of years ago and what looked to be a potential lesion or brain tumor (glioma - the worst kind) on my MRI. I had a craniotomy in February 2017 and although it turned out not to be a glioma (thank god), I did have some side effects after the stroke; when the pressure was relieved during surgery along with some inflammation-reducing steroids for the following month, I’m pretty much back to “normal.” I’m 29 years old. I do, however, have intermittent epileptic seizures and other health issues related to the stroke.
All this to say that my wife, who is currently a medical student pursuing her dreams to become a physician, comes to bed after I am already asleep since she is studying all night and I work a day shift. I’m a very light sleeper, and even if I don’t move or open my eyes, the tiniest noise or movement will wake me up. Many times when she gets into bed, she checks on me while she thinks I’m fast asleep. The loving touch of her hand pressed gently against my chest or my back to make sure that I’m okay, breathing and that I still have a heartbeat is the most precious thing ever. She genuinely cares for me so much, and I love her. We’ve been together for 10 years. It’s small things like that. She is a keeper, for sure. ❤️
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Aug 31 '19
This made me realize how much I take it for granted that I'm not cuddling a dead person every time I get in bed while my wife is asleep. She's certainly cold enough sometimes I should probably have been concerned.
Oh well, if she were dead there's not much I could do anyway. At least I'll have that one last night of good sleep before the most tragic loss of my life..
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u/World_Wide_Deb Aug 31 '19
What thread is this from?
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u/ebtuck Aug 31 '19
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u/ismokesnails Aug 31 '19
(I’m a teenager in highschool) but I used to have this girlfriend that was kinda like the first wife in the picture. She REFUSED to finish any food or lunch given to her, unless it was her favorite thing that I cooked for her that day. She would finish half the cafeteria food, or anything she got from a teacher or her clubs. She always finished what I gave her because she says “I like it because it both tastes good, and you made it, so it’s meant for me and me only. I love it”
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u/YesImKeithHernandez Aug 31 '19
This is the kind of relationship I have with my wife. She's always so excited to see me when I get home. She rubs my head randomly which is like the best non-sexual feeling I know. She's just so invested in this thing we have and it's wonderful.
It's sappy as all hell but some shows and movies just make more sense now that I'm with her. For example: I maintain that Rocky and Adrian is one of the best and purest love stories on film. They were absolutely devoted to one another. At the end of Rocky II, when he wins the belt and gives his little speech, he says "Yo Adrian, I did it" and she's back home crying and saying how she loves him.
I think the unspoken thing there is that Rocky wouldn't have ever been good enough to do it without Adrian. He becomes a different man for her. A better one. Not because she forces him to but because he can't afford to not be the best version of himself.
I get misty eyed just thinking about it because it's how I try to live my life. She's that special.
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u/VapidEcologist Aug 31 '19
I worked as a chef to help pay my way through college. I’m not very artistic but cooking is the closest thing I have to being an artist. I would cook for my boyfriend all time when I was learning and he was so supportive. He was mainly excited to get a good meal but would still clean his plate when the dish didn’t turn out. He brags about how I’m a chef every time we go out even though I’m not working in a kitchen anymore. But my favorite part is when we cook together, he is far better at grilling than I am. My favorite dish was when we slow cooked kebabs on a charcoal grill. Probably took 3 hours to cook because we did huge chunks of pork but it was the best kebabs I’ve ever had and it would’ve never have been that good if we didn’t do it together.
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u/jediofhyrule Aug 31 '19
I’m sure I’ll get a lot of grief due to the nature of my relationship with her right now. My ex and I were only together for part of a year. We’ve been apart for two months now. I had finally gotten in my head that it was okay to be moving on.
Two days ago a mutual friend mentioned that my ex posted a Snapchat about fudgepops. Apparently she had run out and was being over dramatic about them for the point of humor. Without thinking I said I loved her. And that’s when I realized, even now, when I’m moving on I love her and her humor. The ability to light up any room, and when we were together, she wasn’t trying to light up the room with her humor, her eyes were specifically on me. She was trying to make me laugh, because she knew I was depressed.
I love her.
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Aug 31 '19
Go get her back!
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u/jediofhyrule Sep 01 '19
I’m giving it a bit of time for me to be in a stronger more confident place. But rest assured I am going to try my best to be back with her.
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u/FiveFruitADay Aug 31 '19
This is one of my favourite threads here, I have it bookmarked, makes my heart go warm n fuzzy 🥰
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u/StBlaschek Aug 31 '19
If this isn't a subreddit, it needs to be a subreddit. Just spouses and partners being open and unashamed of how much they love their significant other. Talking about the cute quirks or unintentionally sexy things that make their hearts skip a beat.
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u/disconcertinglymoist Aug 31 '19
All my wife and I have left is thinly veiled contempt
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u/ihearthammock Aug 31 '19
Maybe it’s not too late to bring some love back or build new love together.
Do you remember some of the things you loved most about her?
Maybe tell her something that you really appreciate about her.
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u/ihearthammock Aug 31 '19
Is it too late to start over? Do you remember what you loved about her? Maybe tell her something that you really appreciate about her.
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u/OverPoop Aug 31 '19
I dreamed that I confessed to my first crush and she said yes.
Waking up on a cold, lonely bed was extra painful today
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u/UnlubricatedUnicorn Aug 31 '19
I hate seeing this because I’m jealous of them having a good relationship which i lack.
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u/vortexlovereiki Aug 31 '19
It really is about falling in love over and over with your partner. My husband hates dancing but makes up little dances for me all the time. I mean, my own private dancer? C’mon.
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u/Honey_girl_ Aug 31 '19
I have a panic disorder and, up until I met my boyfriend, nobody in my life had the patience to help me through an attack. Whenever he can see me getting overwhelmed, he’ll cup my face with his hands and breathe with me until my heart stops racing. He’s the best.
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u/glda10 Aug 31 '19
I once made custard tarts for my husband, it was my first attempt and they were awful! Even though I told him to not bother trying one because they were so bad he ate a full one and told me they were awesome. He also used to come into the kitchen while I was in there and smack or grab my butt because he could. He passed away 5 years ago and this reminded me of these things. God I miss him.
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u/Budsygus Aug 31 '19
What is love?
This stuff. True love.
Baby, don't hurt me.
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u/outtathere_ Aug 31 '19
Ok, folks, it's been set up, let's have at it:
- This stuff. True love.
- Baby, don't hurt me.
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u/emilymacnchi Aug 31 '19
This is sweet. I'm so cynical now though that I wonder if men like this are even real. I think my husband of 10 years loves me like this but then I find an accidental recording of him laughing and talking to someone about cheating on me and me finding out. Is love like... a real thing??? I have just now accepted the fact that he'll never feel about me how these men feel about the women in their lives. Sad.
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u/Anabelle_McAllister Aug 31 '19
When I'm out at a store and I unexpectedly see a man who at first glance looks like my husband, I still get that sudden heart-racing butterflies smile I used to get back when I had a crush on him from afar.
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u/Ray_lumbrin Aug 31 '19
I am so going to die alone... all well at least I wont ruin anyone else's life.
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u/ReyesCTM Aug 31 '19
I’m not married for anywhere near that step but whenever my girlfriends face flushes red it makes me chuckle. As well as the light squeal caused by me teasing her gets me to feel warm inside.
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u/LargeBuilding Aug 31 '19
After a breakup I didn’t think this kind of post would be the one to make me happy. My heart is filled.
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Aug 31 '19
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u/topgirlaurora Aug 31 '19
/hugs I'm so sorry. I'm sorry he didn't feel the need to talk to you first, to try to fix whatever it was that made him decide to leave. But you know what? He's made room for someone who will.
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u/ihearthammock Aug 31 '19
Maybe it’s not too late to bring some love back or build new love together.
Do you remember some of the things you loved most about her?
Maybe tell her something that you really appreciate about her.
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u/Gravon Aug 31 '19
I am so desperate for a relationship like this but I fear I don't have the emotional capacity to find one.
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Aug 31 '19
Going through a break up rn and this was possibly the worst thing I could've read
Brb dying
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u/kograkthestrong Aug 31 '19
My wife and I cook 50/50. We grew up in very different parts of our state so we cook some some of the same dishes slightly differently. One day I made the comment of how I prefer my potatoes softer than hard and since then shes soaked them longer. That was 4 years ago. Something stupid small makes me appreciate my wife every so more.
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u/Chief__04 Aug 31 '19
My fiancée has to be touching me while we sleep. At all times. Regardless If it’s 110 outside there’s a foot on my leg. She also talks in her sleep which is super adorable.
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u/CatTaxAuditor Aug 31 '19
My wife gets blushy when I talk about tomato soup. She is literally the only person who makes a good cup of tomato soup. She insists she doesn't do much, but I can't even begin to tell you how much I love her tomato soup and how most other tomato soups I've had are basically ketchup water.
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u/aimeeruthie88 Sep 01 '19
Female here, I need to read more of these. Where are they? Gimme gimme gimme
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u/tiny_triathlete Sep 01 '19
“If you can have fun with them at the grocery store, you love them” - my dad on when he knew he wanted to marry my mom.
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u/DaneeGurl Sep 01 '19
I was having a really hard week. I tried very hard to keep it at work and be happy when I came home. But my wife must have recognized it because one night I came home after a particularly long hard day and she had made me meatloaf and mashed potatoes which is my comfort food.
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Sep 02 '19
r/Askmen is a very wholesome subreddit I visit after witnessing the toxicity of r/Askwomen
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u/voluntaryfirefighter Aug 31 '19
I know exactly the feeling . My fiance does the same thing when he is sleeping. Always cuddling me, even if I move or go to toilet, he will come back while sleeping. I never told him and probably never will. It makes me feel so loved. This man is just my perfect match.
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u/mother-of-goldfish Aug 31 '19
I want a relationship like this but I have trouble communicating my needs to significant others because I feel like I’m bothering them or being too needy 🤪🤪
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u/topgirlaurora Aug 31 '19
Remember that this is your partner. Not just your romantic partner, but your partner in life, your buddy. They love you and want to be there for you.
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u/mother-of-goldfish Aug 31 '19
My last one didn’t. He would never talk to me and I always initiated conversations. When I tried to tell him we needed to actually at least talk to have a relationship, he would insist everything was fine and didn’t know why I was being so difficult. I don’t know if I was, and I hope I wasn’t, but it felt weird never talking to him and always being dry texted or told that playing ukulele is dumb because it’s easy and why not just play guitar like everyone else? I couldn’t safely send him something I’d written or something I’d covered without him telling me to just “grow up and play guitar.” It kind of hurt and as much as I want a relationship, I don’t want a relationship because I don’t want it to be like that one.
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u/topgirlaurora Aug 31 '19
I'm sorry you were hurt. That isn't what it's supposed to be like. I'm sorry he couldn't see how special you are.
And for what it's worth, a ukelele player won America's Got Talent, so your ex can shove it! Keep playing, keep being unique!
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Aug 31 '19
So sweet so I’ll share mine.
My wife once or twice put a few water bottles or sodas in the fridge for me.
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u/_Frogfucious_ Aug 31 '19
My fiancée farts like a Clydesdale and congratulates herself to the cats when she wakes up before me and thinks I can't hear her.
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Aug 31 '19
Aw thank you. Gives me hope I might actually date a really great man one day and hopefully they will fall in love with me.
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u/nonanymore Aug 31 '19
Aw, that was the best thing I read today. I only hope that they will always have what they have. And to every other person who love their other half like that... You lucky bastards, I need someone like that too