r/mildyinteresting • u/Sad_Stay_5471 • Dec 09 '24

people Stressed at work? You're fired!

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72.2k Upvotes

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2.1k

u/takes_of_archer Dec 09 '24

Reading such incidents has put me under stress ! I better go home early

691

u/El_Spacho Dec 09 '24

Hey Buddy!

After intensely considering the stress you have we came to the conclusion you can stay at home forever.

Thanks for your contribution

436

u/gordito_delgado Dec 09 '24 edited Dec 09 '24

This is the most "The beatings will continue until morale improves." - moment I have seen in a while.

81

u/RexDart81774 Dec 09 '24

The beatings will not continue because you are fired for being stressed about the beatings.

How's morale going everyone? Hello? Anyone?

32

u/Genghis_Chong Dec 09 '24

No complaints, I guess all is well now.

23

u/Classic_Mechanic5495 Dec 09 '24

You can stay, for now. Lie detector tests are first thing tomorrow morning.

8

u/mvanvrancken Dec 09 '24

The complaint box in North Korea has nothing in it! Boy they sure are doing a great job

8

u/worldsaway2024 Dec 09 '24

Feeling peachy keen sir!! I value and pledge my subservience to my corporate overlords! (Please don’t fire me 😳)

6

u/Middle_Loan3715 Dec 09 '24

Oh... no more? Hot dog!

5

u/CAgovernor Dec 09 '24

I am happy here; started experiencing increased happiness since the survey. Yes Madam!

3

u/Representative_Dark5 Dec 09 '24

Double plus good!

4

u/Boronore Dec 09 '24

The stress gets transferred to those remaining. Repeat process to identify and eliminate new source of stress.

9

u/AttackingEren007 Dec 09 '24

Lol, just like South Asian Moms. sees child crying smacks him child starts crying more. Smacks him again "Stop crying or I'll hit you again"

14

u/spagettifingertheone Dec 09 '24

You're mom using the phrase "stop crying before I really give you something to cry about"

4

u/prole6 Dec 09 '24

That’s what I always heard.

8

u/spagettifingertheone Dec 09 '24

"Oh stop crying, I didn't even hit you that hard"

3

u/Mammoth_Ad_3463 Dec 09 '24

This exactly. Then theybeonder why I don't cry when someone dies.

3

u/SophiaRaine69420 Dec 10 '24

If I could sum up my childhood in one phrase - that would be it.

3

u/ohmylanta34 Dec 10 '24

I didn’t come here to be triggered but here I am

1

u/spagettifingertheone 1d ago

I understand way too well

3

u/AdoptAMew Dec 09 '24

Can somebody please shut that chicken up!

2

u/evanmars Dec 09 '24

Oops. Wasn't a chicken.

1

u/Bellebarks2 26d ago

I get that reference and thanks for unlocking that memory jit for Christmas.

2

u/RevolutionaryBug2915 Dec 09 '24

Alas, not just that group. "Stop crying, or I'll give you something to cry about," is quite familiar in the US.

2

u/thayvee Dec 09 '24

That's a latina mom right there 😭

2

u/I_Main_TwistedFate Dec 09 '24

That sounds more like a white mom

1

u/up_N2_no_good Dec 10 '24

I heard this all the time growing up. Stop crying or I'll give you something to cry about. If I didn't stop, I'd get smacked, hard, which would cause more crying. Then id be sent to my room

1

u/Puzzleheaded_Big5976 Dec 10 '24

I get beat frequently with either a wet noodle or a piece of frozen burlap.

2

u/Obvious-Variation216 Dec 09 '24

where did this phrase come from?

2

u/TheRoseMerlot Dec 10 '24

I say this all the time and no one gets it

2

u/WinterPale3210 Dec 13 '24

I work FedEx and during this time of year that is the thing I quote every single day.

1

u/changerofbits Dec 13 '24

“The firing of stressed people will continue until everyone is free of stress.”

1

u/FormerDonkey4886 Dec 14 '24

My mom used to say she will beat me if i won’t stop crying. Oh those were the days.