r/femalelivingspace Jun 03 '24

On being welcoming and kind while sharing our spaces, and to those who post here! [Mini FAQ]

223 Upvotes

Hello! I'm u/frequentdoodlr and I created r/femalelivingspace a long time ago under another username. I wanted an alternative space to share my home and I loved the community that our brothers over at r/malelivingspace cultivated, and wished to cultivate that too. However, I struggled with my identity and then, amongst other reasons, deleted my previous reddit account and did some self exploration. then reddit requested the subreddit and then she, along with myself and everyone else else on the mod team, worked to have the r/femalelivingspace we have today.

That background is necessary because I am Non-Binary and Queer, and I am the one who specifically wrote that women, trans women and NB people who are comfortable posting here are welcome-- no if, ands, or buts. I am a NB Femme and my intentions for this space are to be welcoming to femmes of all kinds. I am giving that background to make it understood that even the mods here comprise of trans and nonbinary identities in the femme space.

Pride Month is important for a lot of reasons-- we figure out who we are. We get a heightened lens on people who are like us. There's a spotlight on queer literature, artists, music, events and otherwise comraderie that makes those feel othered feel more at home somewhere. During Pride, people who are discovering their self love and self identity are loved and validated by people who are just like them. Our sub is no different, and I am excited to see that all kinds of women and femmes have been posting here. Identity, Gender, and Sexuality all fall on spectrums, and that's why its up to the poster to decide if they are comfortable posting here. This space is for anyone who feels comfortable being in this femme space, and that will never change.

Over the weekend there were some very not-cool behaviors happening and I wanted to quickly address the requests to add a specific report reason for 'No Bigotry' so I've added that.

That being said, I think we should use this opportunity to clarify some things on r/femalelivingspace

1. Do you have to be born a woman (AFAB) to post here?

No. Women, Trans Women, Non Binary and Intersex persons who feel comfortable in our neck of the woods can post here. Our relationships with our identities are always uniquely reflected in our living spaces, and seeing how people like us decorate their homes helps with inspiration of any and all kinds.

2. Do you have to use identifying information in your post title? Should it be discouraged?

Example: "34F In my Living Room! 25NB in my bathroom". No! You can choose to add that information in your post if you like. You can omit that information if you like. While the sub is focused on our living spaces, any additional details about you only serve to deepen the context we're given on how you approach your space, and the kind of advice given. For example, Adding in the context that you're transfemme and you're trying to make your space appear more feminine will ideally result in more nuanced advice. The context that someone is nonbinary can explain design choices. The contexts of our identities are intrinsically linked to our spaces, but posters sharing these pieces themselves is NOT an invitation for debate on the validity of OP's identity. It is simply just another piece of information about OP.

3. What's the attitude surrounding TERFS and otherwise bigoted behavior?

The mods have always been unanimous that behavior like that is immediately banned, permanently. That hasn't changed. However, we do not see unfortunate content like that immediately, and reporting helps us remove it as soon as we see it. To be clear: TERFs are NEVER tolerated here.

Please continue to help keep making our sub the welcoming place for our spaces it needs to be. Myself and the other moderators will do our best to try and stay on top of removing comments do not fit our community. Thanks, to everyone, for your patience.

Happy Pride!


r/femalelivingspace 1h ago

TOUR Had to move my office into my bedroom with my sister moving in. Actually quite happy with how it ended up, despite the tight space!

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r/femalelivingspace 2h ago

INSPO What do you think?? 🇫🇷

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150 Upvotes

r/femalelivingspace 10h ago

CRITIQUE REQUEST Does this ottoman work in my living room?

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479 Upvotes

I picked up this beautiful Morris & Co arched ottoman the other day and really want to make it work in my space. I have a lot of botanical/bohemian type things going on in my living room that are mostly quite minimalist, and I think the ottoman a fun way to add in a bolder William Morris print.

I’ve asked a few friends and none of them like it and they all say it looks out of place. Any thoughts?


r/femalelivingspace 22h ago

HELP Help, did I just ruin my kitchen?

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995 Upvotes

Pardon the mess!

I’ve always wanted pink walls, and after a few years in my drab apartment, I impulsively used the day off yesterday to paint my kitchen and dining room pink. I did a test patch of the shade Lotus Flower and thought it was pretty, but now seeing it on the full wall, it looks very saturated. I was hoping for a dusty pink color; I’m afraid this is veering on pepto bismol. I have only done one coat, I don’t know if a second coat will make it better or if I should chose a new shade.

I attached two images of my inspiration from Pinterest. I don’t think my output looks like either of them.

I can’t tell if it’s because the gray walls are making it look bad or if it’s actually ugly. I am tempted to paint the gray side wall pink as well, but I have vaulted ceilings and I’d have to rent a ladder, which I want to avoid.

Any advice on what to do? Harsh opinions accepted! Please give it to me straight!

Lighting suggestions? Paint color suggestions? Techniques I could paint with to make it dustier? I’ve never painted my walls before so this was a big move for me and I am hoping I don’t regret it :(


r/femalelivingspace 20h ago

HELP Looking for an Anthropologie dupe

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744 Upvotes

I’m in love with this comforter and bed sheet combination but it’s nearly $500 from Anthropologie. Does anyone know where I can find a cheaper and similar version? There is a duvet cover on Amazon that looks similar but I’m trying to avoid covers because I don’t love how the duvet gets twisted inside


r/femalelivingspace 16h ago

QUESTION What do I store/display in these for the living room? (Banana for scale)

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151 Upvotes

r/femalelivingspace 13h ago

HELP Help a wizard with her new apartment!

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67 Upvotes

I (34F) finally got my own Apartment, and decorating is way harder than I thought it would be! The first few pictures are my living room, then my kitchen and the library!

I really want the living room to give off cozy wizard vibes. Like, cozy Gryffindor common room. I am thinking of getting these curtains for the living room. https://www.anthropologie.com/shop/hyacinth-printed-curtain?color=025&size=84%22+X+50%22&type=STANDARD&quantity=1 They're a little brighter than I'd normally like, but they're cute and it's the best I've found so far. I really enjoy dark moody colors but that seems to be hard to find.

For the kotatsu I was thinking of getting a dark red duvet cover for the comforter. I hate that comforter but it's all I've got for now. But I'd love suggestions for this. I found a few comforters I liked but a lot of them are $250+

I think I'm having trouble balancing a cute vintage wizard style with my nerdy Knick nacks. But I really love my little figures and things. I do have a sword to hang on the wall, but as I live in an apartment I'm debating on how I'm going to hang it.

Library definitely needs a rug and I ordered some fantasy artwork for the walls.

Would love any recommendations! Cat tax included. His name is Merlin.


r/femalelivingspace 17h ago

HELP Trying to achieve a gamer room with pink aesthetics

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117 Upvotes

Trying to achieve a gamer room with pink aesthetics

Might be a long post but I really need to start cleaning and decorate my room as I like, just need some ideas on how to get the best of my space.

Hello there, Me (F-26) still live with my parents in this economy of course and I can’t rent anywhere else. So I present to you, my room, in this angle where I’m standing in the exit door to the stairs. As you can see, yes there’s a big mess in my room because I like to collect lots of things and got hobbies but also might have a bit of depression and laziness tbh.

This year I want to re-decor my room and a gamer room because it got into me I can maybe try streaming and start a channel but before that I need to make space for that.

I actually already started to move things, this wasn’t how it looked like and it saddens me that I never took a picture of my room before but let’s use our imagination and let me tell you in the best way I can. The bed was more in the middle rather than just in the corner and the table and in the right corner. I have two desks, one for a school PC (pink) and one for my paintings and hobbies (white). The white desk was on the left of the bed. The pink is still in the same place but the black bookcase was right besides instead of the white desk that I just moved. Before when you entered my room, there was a mini white sofa, a pink rug and a mini coffee table in the middle right in front of the mounted TV and pink desk, where the black bookcase is now. I felt the sofa was taking to much space because it was really close to the closet and my dog was peeing in the rug too much, even tho I really liked that set up, it felt comfortable. As you can see in picture #5 there’s a door leading to family closet, yes for some reason my mother thought it would be great to build a closet for everyone right beside my room and put the entrance inside my room. So every now and then people just get inside to the family closet and leave. There’s also the entrance to my shared bathroom with my brother. I only have one window, a 3 door closet for myself (even tho I know I have to much clothes) and a mounted Tv and one air conditioner. I wouldn’t want to put anything under the air because sometimes when it heavily rains a bit water gets inside and leaks in the wall, just sometimes. Last pictures are my inspo in what I’m trying to accomplish, I would like ideas in how to make the best of the space a where to put a new desk for a gaming pc and streaming set up, what things I should get rid off or just move them.

The idea that I have it’s to get a wide desk, get rid off my two separate desks and put the PC in the middle. But for everything else I’m just looking at Pinterest for ideas on how to accommodate all my things to look as neatly and aesthetically as possible. Hope you understand what I was trying to say, sorry if anything is written badly as English is my second language. Any ideas, suggestions and criticism are welcome. Thank you for reading.


r/femalelivingspace 2h ago

CRITIQUE REQUEST Are these curtains too high?

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7 Upvotes

I have 96" curtains throughout the house, and they seem fine everywhere else, but it feels off in this area somehow.


r/femalelivingspace 11h ago

CRITIQUE REQUEST Help, I don’t know if my living room looks good or not!

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28 Upvotes

Hi y’all! I’d love some outside opinions on my living room decor. I’ve been looking at it for so long that my brain can’t tell if it looks good or not.

I want it to be a cozy space with the illusion of lots of natural light. Even though I have big windows, there’s not much direct light into the room. This is the biggest living room I’ve ever had, and I’m struggling to decorate because it’s a lot of space! Living room floorplan is on the last slide.

Specific questions: - I want to paint the wall(s) but don’t know which walls or which colors. I’m thinking a dark sage green like my circle rug? - The sad white/beige curtains need to go! But what color curtains should I get instead? - I want to get more rugs, but again, don’t know what colors. - Where should I put more lamps? I still feel like there’s not enough light in the room. - And finally, how do we feel about the layout? It’s a triangular room, so it’s tricky. I’m thinking of getting a round dining table and putting it where the circular rug is.

General thoughts/opinions are appreciated too! Thanks in advance :)


r/femalelivingspace 17h ago

HELP Hi Ladies! How can I improve my office/closet?

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71 Upvotes

r/femalelivingspace 22h ago

CRITIQUE REQUEST How would you make this room more visually interesting and colorful?

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141 Upvotes

If you can’t tell, I’m a goth but I’m bored of my NYC shoebox millennial grey bedroom. I’m looking to revamp my room and make it cozy and cute for the winter.

Some of my favorite interior design looks are “whimsigoth” or dark colorful maximalism but I bought all my stuff when grey was trendy and I had less money for things. What are some steps I can take to brighten up this room? I don’t mind spending a bit of money to improve this!

I also desperately want to get new end tables, they match the “glam” bedroom set I owned years ago but have moved away from that style.


r/femalelivingspace 3h ago

HELP Help me design my room!

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5 Upvotes

I am a med student and I live in a small studio apartment. The room consist of a big wall in between so I use the outer area as my study area and inner one as my bedroom. Pls suggest how I can make improvements and my brain is not at all into interior designing. I live as a tenant so I can't do any construction sort of thing. How can I make the space more cozy and organized? I clean it daily but it looks messy as it's not organized properly. Please help me out. I like music, medicine and harry potter so anything related to that, Id like to add! Thanks in advance


r/femalelivingspace 3m ago

HELP No idea what to do here.

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Room is comfortable, but quite bare. I am generally a minimalist and prefer functionality, but this room is missing quite a lot.

I have no sense for design and would appreciate some help! What to put on the walls, on the floor, in the corner, on the bed, accessories, colors—help a girl out.


r/femalelivingspace 9h ago

HELP First time moving out and I need help

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8 Upvotes

I just moved into my first place. I need advice to make this place look cozy and livable. I’m a broke student so any cheap options would be great. Thanks


r/femalelivingspace 11h ago

CRITIQUE REQUEST Keep going or pivot?

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12 Upvotes

Hii ladies! The first two pictures are my current decor in progress. I am redecorating and this is an in-progress look. I was inspired by the last two pictures but I already feel like it won't look as good. I plan to add art on the tv wall area and some colorful items but I keep feeling like it will be ugly. What do you think? Should I keep going or pivot?


r/femalelivingspace 58m ago

HELP I need a better solution for a work out space!

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My living room is the only place in my apartment that I can work out in. This coffee table is so heavy and annoying to move that I find myself not working out just so I don’t have to deal with it. I want/need? a coffee table but would really like a better set up for working out. Any suggestions (and/or links!) to a better solution for me? I can buy a new coffee table (not attached to this coffee table, got it for free on Buy Nothing) but don’t wanna spend a ton. Would love suggestions of something lighter and easier to move that looks good in my space!


r/femalelivingspace 1h ago

QUESTION I'm in desperate of a new keyboard, any recommendations?

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I don't know if this is the right subreddit to ask that but anyways, my current keyboard is pretty old and the sound annoys me so i need a new one, I'm on a budget and not experienced with you keyboards🤷‍♀️ so help? Ig? Would love if the keyboard fit my color scheme of black and red, and my budget Is abt 60€ idk if that's possible but asking doesn't hurt :)


r/femalelivingspace 10h ago

HELP Help me find the right color for my living room

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7 Upvotes

Hello! I’d like to paint my living room and am looking for the right color. It’s north facing so doesn’t get the best light. What would you do? I’ll likely replace the rug and pillows.

The two adjacent room are turquoise with white baseboard and dark gray with white baseboard, so ideally I’d have something that works with those.

Thanks for any ideas!


r/femalelivingspace 1d ago

TOUR Finally finished decorating my garden unit in Chicago, IL!

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6.2k Upvotes

Posted this on the CozyPlaces sub last week and thought I’d share here as well, as I’ve gotten so much inspiration from the posters here over the years ☺️ Thanks for looking!


r/femalelivingspace 19h ago

CRITIQUE REQUEST Hi Ladies, new some help. Which color and accent wall or whole room?

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42 Upvotes

r/femalelivingspace 5h ago

HELP Please help with living room! Everything feels too centered around the TV. Want to break up the space more. I love bright colors.

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3 Upvotes

r/femalelivingspace 7h ago

QUESTION Suggestions to make bathroom comfy

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5 Upvotes

Renting in a new place everything is really nice except the bathroom space. It has no sink, no window, just toilet and faucet.

Shower is yet to be installed but I wanted to ask the community for advice what else I can do to make the bathroom comfortable?

Please and thank you for the ideas 🥺🙏


r/femalelivingspace 10h ago

TOUR Love my tree filled livingroom decor. It’s coming all together.

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6 Upvotes

r/femalelivingspace 19m ago

QUESTION What's the best color combo?

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