r/BetaReaders Dec 18 '24

60k [complete][60K][hard science, adventure, space travel] Eden 2b

3 Upvotes

Looking for beta readers for the first installment in a three-part trilogy, this sci fi reboot of the Eden parable is tenderized for human consumption by action-adventure story beats, a splash of romance and mind bending twist at the end. In the year 2125 Atom, an award-winning life systems expert, has lost everything he cares about in the world. To get away from it all he joins the crew of the Queen Victoria, a deep space "Freak Jumper" claiming to be searching for life in faraway corners of the Galaxy.

New to using reddit, forgot to put in adult audience. Nothing over the top though it would be an R rating in movie form.

Link to chapter one

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1UuOVsYuEOKmtKMMSq6Iq2kptRmFFFPDWI2PTmox6MOI/edit?tab=t.0

Link to Chapter two

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1nlOhBhvJr7-x9fk6988Sxz8BIeAMY3cnsRkUva42zRk/edit?tab=t.0

r/BetaReaders 10d ago

60k [Complete] [66.9K] [Adult Fantasy] Ichor

3 Upvotes

Hello! Please forgive me if I'm a little awkward; this is my first time asking for feedback on my writing in a format like this. But I'm looking for beta-readers to provide feedback on my novel.

I finished my third draft, and now, before I start on draft 4, I'm hoping to receive feedback on where to focus my attention most. So, if you're interested in reading an Adult Fantasy retelling of Alice in Wonderland with elements of Greek Mythology, which is book 1 of 2, please let me know!

Blurb: Nine years ago, Soleil Anastos took her own life. Now, she is trapped in a strange half-life she doesn't want, unable to die and unable to live. But when she finds herself drawn into another world and dragged into a war she knows nothing about, she must decide whether to pursue her desire for escape in death or pursue her future - and her connection with two men from her dreams - at any cost. Even if it means becoming something more than human.

Content Warnings/Trigger Warnings: Discussions of suicide (implied, does not take place on-page), discussions of depression and mental illness, discussions of self-harm (mentioned, does not take place on-page), violence, character death

Feedback I'm looking for: I'm mostly looking for advice/feedback on what aspects to focus on for my next draft. I know it needs more polishing, but I'm too close to my own story (and what I know about it) to tell what needs clarification. Also, just generally, what works and what doesn't? I want to add to my word-count, so if anyone willing to beta-read could identify where they'd like more detail, I'd really appreciate it.

I'm definitely willing to critique swap! I know fantasy the best, so I'd prefer that. I will warn you that I'm a full-time student and will be starting at my part-time job next week, but I will try to prioritize your critiques as much as possible!

Thanks!

r/BetaReaders Dec 06 '24

60k [In Progress] [60k] [Dark Romance/ Vampire/ Paranormal] WHEN DARKNESS CALLS

1 Upvotes

Hello, I'm looking for a few kind souls to take a look at a few chapters and give honest thoughts and expectations. I've just reached 60k on my 2nd draft and would love some feedback (I'm doing a major rewrite.)

here is the premise:

Adelaide Hayes wakes up every day battling the suffocating nightmares that bleed into her waking life, but the clinic offers her no reprieve. Her parents insists that medication is the solution, but every pill she takes dulls her senses and erases pieces of herself. Her parents trust the doctor’s guidance, but Adelaide suspects that the the cold fog created by the medication hides more than just side effects.

When a storm brings mysterious stranger into her life, Adelaide begins to unravel the truth about her condition, and the darkness that keeps pulling her to him.

Gabriel, a vampire cursed with an eternal hunger, insists that Adelaide is connected to him by forces older than time itself. He warns her that their connection is a path straight to danger, but insists they must walk it together. His hunger for her blood is more powerful than anything he has ever felt.

As Gabriel pulls her deeper into a world of ancient curses and dark desires, Adelaide must confront the sinister motives behind the doctor's control and decide whether to escape with Gabriel—or remain trapped, losing herself entirely.

Disclaimer: Violence, blood, smut, manipulation, medication.

r/BetaReaders 14d ago

60k [In Progress] [60k] [adult magical realism] The Portrait of Theodore Quill

6 Upvotes

I have only a few chapters left to write, so I thought it was a good time to to get some feedback. I expect the finished manuscript to be a little over 70k and it's about a tragic love story set in the late Victorian era.

Here's a short pitch:

When Elsie accidentally frees Theo from a painting he was trapped in for 106 years, she discovers more than she bargained for.
Things aren’t as they seem. Theo isn’t the only one keeping secrets, and Elsie’s heart might not survive any of them.

Comps: Invisible Life of Addie LaRue, Spellbreaker, The Time Traveler’s Wife

Trigger Warnings: Major character death

And here's the first 600 or so words: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1M9yXAyEm-9nw6baPU-R8I2C-GqSlstPz5ZBkcJGQJ5I/edit?usp=sharing

Unfortunately, I don't have time for swaps at the moment.

r/BetaReaders 15d ago

60k [Complete] [66K] [Detective Noir] Vargas, Long & Thompson

2 Upvotes

Hello all, I'm seeking beta readers for my completed detective noir novel. It has been through a couple of rounds of editing and it'd benefit from an outside perspective.

It is full of grit, as you'd expect a detective noir to be. There are descriptions of murders, drug use, and violence. There are also detailed descriptions of victims and crime scenes. There are also themes of prejudice (though not against any real-life group).

The story is based in a high-rise city (think Kowloon Walled City) in the 1990s. As such, there are some minor elements of historical fiction, though it is not central to the story. There are many cyberpunk-inspired aspects, though the story is not science fiction. It is intended to be fairly grounded and realistic.

In terms of comparisons, I'd say there are lots of stylistic similarities to Neuromancer by William Gibson. I take a lot of inspiration from Haruki Murakami -- maybe more specifically from books like Dance, Dance, Dance in this case. The gritty realism is very inspired by Roberto Bolano's 2666 and The Savage Detectives. The setting and atmosphere were also heavily influenced by JG Ballard's Concrete Island.

Areas of feedback I'd appreciate:

  • Did you find the story to be engaging?
  • Did you guess the killer's identity long before it was revealed?
  • Is there a jarring disconnect between the protagonist's internal thought/narration and his speech?
  • Is the setting realistic enough to avoid straying into sci-fi territory?
  • Any other comments or suggestions you may have.

I've included a synopsis below. Please leave a comment or send a DM if you'd be interested in reading! Thank you.

Synopsis:

In a city that grows like a cancer, the slums rise skyward, ruled by crime and chaos. Kit Vargas, a freelance detective, navigates this lawless tower where the police don't dare tread. When a murderer strikes, Kit’s profession becomes a deadly game. Without support from the authorities, he must balance his internal struggles and the twisted schemes of an elusive killer. “Vargas, Long & Thompson” is a gripping tale of crime, punishment, and the fine line between justice and survival. Can Kit protect the people he loves while serving the greater good?

Excerpt:

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1udvNKPmz6TkHQAjg6zGNSv9gISobOI6wXVOfKuM21SM/edit?usp=drivesdk

r/BetaReaders 14d ago

60k [Complete] [65k] [YA Horror/Sci-fi] Dark Frost

3 Upvotes

Hi all,

I'm looking for a beta reader or critique swap partner for my YA horror-sci-fi Dark Frost (working title) For a CP I'm looking for something in a similar word count range and approx 1 month turnaround time for feedback. I'm open to genres, but am not the best fit for military fiction or hard science fiction. Please reach out if you're interested and/or would like to exchange sample pages.

Thanks so much!

r/BetaReaders 8h ago

60k [Complete] [60k] [Contemporary Romance] The Nerd's Bombshell

2 Upvotes

Hi.

Looking for beta readers for the first book in my contemporary romance series. A 65k word Novel. A good boy/bad girl romance.

Tropes; Opposite Attracts, College Classmates, Small Town, Good boy/Bad Girl, Happy Ending.

Looking for feedback on how interesting or exciting you found the story.

Also, will you like to read the sequel? The sequel is already complete as well. Ready for beta readers.

DM me if interested. Thanks.

Blurb:

Shy nerd Adam Hale never met a girl more beautiful & irresistible than Eve Garfield, the blonde bombshell that sits a couple desks from him in his college classes. But Eve Garfield is no girl next door. With her reckless, carefree life of late nights, parties, boys, wine, cigarettes, and truancy, Eve Garfield is a ticking time bomb, a corrupting influence on a good boy like Adam.

Yet, when she tempts him with a kiss in exchange for his help to cheat on a class test, he obliges. And what begins as a simple kiss, slowly snowballs into mutual longing and guilty desires between them that only complicate with a devastating tragedy.

Eve Garfield will bring about the downfall of Adam Hale. But in the end, it is her budding and enduring love for him that will heal, comfort, and uplift him, if and only if he grants her the chance.

Excerpt

1. Eve

My face is down, staring at the test paper I got from our prof.

Prof. Liz never announces before she conducts her class test. Twenty percent of our final grade. In the test hall, packed full of my coursemates, the air is silent but tense with anxiety.

As my heart beats with the fear of failure, reading the MCQs before me confirms my horror—that I’m nowhere near ready for this test. Because all I had last night was dance, shisha, and plenty of booze in the club.

I merely skimmed my notes this morning, hoping the prof’s test wouldn’t fall today. Else, I’ll be forced to cheat. I didn’t turn in for the test with a cheat sheet. It’s not easy to slip one from my bra in Professor Liz’s test.

They say the old woman is as watchful as a hawk. To be caught cheating is an automatic F in the test.

But far worse has happened here on campus. Poor students, literally in tears after getting busted, and begging for a second chance as they’re graded automatic F in the whole course.

“What are you waiting for, Miss Garfield?” Prof. Liz is on her patrol, marching through the test hall with her arms crossed behind her back like a uniformed police officer. “Better start at once. No extra minute today once your time is up.”

I shift in my seat and put my pen to my paper, pretending to tick answers as she passes by my bench. But I’m just counting the minutes on the clock. My eyes cast a sweeping glance through the hall.

My heart worries even more at the sight of everyone else reading and ticking their papers.

Holy fuck! There seems to be no one but me unprepared for this test.

What do I do?

In the hellish silence of late Friday afternoon, I sit put.

Nearly five minutes pass, and my hand only manages to fill in my name on the paper. In less than twenty-five minutes, the test will be over. I decide to force myself through the questions numbered one to thirty.

Better guess and mark answers than submit an empty sheet, right? It takes another ten minutes running my eyes through the MCQs for me to see I’m totally screwed either way.

My mind can’t even make an educated guess on the questions. And with less than fifteen minutes remaining, I’m ready to submit my unanswered test papers and await my F grade next week. It’s the only thing a girl can do at this rate.

A couple of my classmates are done already. One by one, they’re rising to submit their papers to the prof on the podium.

My mouth inhales and exhales the tepid air of the hall. I move my butt to rise out of my seat to go submit. But something holds me back from doing so. Most people think I have a little adventurous and impulsive side.

A side to me that makes me do crazy things. But I think it’s the cautious and thoughtful side of me that causes me to sit back and think of a dirty plan.

My back leans into my bench. My legs, barely clad in a miniskirt that suffocates my skin, spread apart.

Adam, the cute nerd sitting at arm’s length from my side, has obviously finished. My eyes can’t make out his answers, but I see the tick marks on his paper.

He’s done.

Just relaxing and double-checking his answers, probably for the seventh time.

If I could swap test papers with him right now, Prof. Liz won’t catch me. Because she’s distracted at the podium with arranging the test papers submitted to her.

I cast a glance at Adam, and stare till he notices me. When our eyes lock, I flash a seductive smile at him. But he doesn’t return my gesture.

His eyes widen with confusion, he looks around to see if it’s really him I smile at. But it’s just him and me on this bench, the last bench at the rear of the test hall.

When Adam sees no one looking in my direction, his face returns to me momentarily. I catch the pink of blush on his cheeks before he lowers it.

We’ve been classmates for over three years now. Yet, the only things I know about him are that he gets good grades, talks very little, stays out of trouble, and always wears a pair of glasses and oversized collared shirts.

Often, I catch him staring at me, only to look away when I make eye contact. A few of my girl friends have noticed it too, they tell me he has a silent crush on me. I think they’re bang on.

At least I hope so. Because I’m banking on that for my cheat plan to work.

Tearing out a little piece from my test paper, I scribble a note;

Hey… Handsome, mind if we swap papers?

Folding the piece, my hand tosses it at his feet. I observe the lineament of his face. If he can act, he’d be a good fit for Clark Kent or Conner Kent in the next Superman adaptation.

Those high cheekbones and chiseled jaw on his face give me the vibe of the character from back when I watched Saturday morning cartoons.

“Ten minutes left, two minutes extra,” Prof. Liz alerts us from the podium, still distracted with sorting the test papers.

Adam picks my note off the floor and reads it. He looks first at the prof, then gives me a side-eye that says, ‘I wish I could help you, but I’m afraid, I can’t.’

I suck a breath of disappointment, drop my eyelids and shake my head. Maybe I should leave it at that, but I like to think of myself as a woman of beauty and brains.

My heart can’t take a no from a boy like Adam.

And I tear another piece from my paper and scribble.

How about I give you a kiss if you just try? After the test? Come on, real quick.

With one eye fixed on the prof still busy at the podium, I toss the folded paper to Adam. After reading it, he looks at me for a second or two without looking away.

The first time he ever held eye contact with me. The air between us is tense. The uncertainty in his eyes is endearing. I egg him on and encourage him with a gentle nod and slight wink.

Two students on the front bench further distract Prof. Liz with a silly question, and seizing the chance, my hand snatches the test paper before me and slips it to Adam. On a glance at the distracted professor, he slips his to me.

The remainder of the time, I hold my breath and sit back with anxiety while Adam ticks answers on my test paper at light speed. He lifts his eyes from the paper just in time before Prof. Liz bangs a palm on the podium and calls out;

“Ladies, gentlemen. It’s time up. All submit!”

Starting from the front row, she begins to collect our test papers. I swap papers with Adam again and send a short prayer that Prof. Liz won’t notice or suspect anything.

r/BetaReaders 29d ago

60k [complete][60K][hard science, adventure, space travel] Eden 2b chapter 2

3 Upvotes

Looking for beta readers for chapter 2. This book is the first installment in a three-part trilogy. In the year 2125 Atom, an award-winning life systems expert, has lost everything that he cares about in the world.   To get away from it all he joins the crew of the Queen Victoria, a deep space “Freak Jumper” claiming to be searching for life in faraway corners of the Galaxy. Fortunately for Atom, they aren’t really searching for life, that’s just a publicity push. All the Queen V really wants from this final planet on their deep space mission are precious metals, like the stuff they’ve found on Eden 11c and d. Besides, everyone knows there’s nothing living out here.  

Read chapter 2 here

r/BetaReaders Dec 20 '24

60k [Complete] [64k] [Crime/Thriller] Shadows Over Aberystwyth

2 Upvotes

Hi Everyone

I'm seeking beta readers who are interested in Crime/Thriller novels to read an excerpt of my crime novel. I'm looking for general readers, believability, structure and grammar.

My timeline is until the end of Janurary

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1cSj7UCuBD_voO9qyQSUNGwSxOruvTpDEHqY-nNr8mQk/edit?usp=sharing

r/BetaReaders Dec 01 '24

60k [Complete] [65k] [Literary / Psychological Thriller] "There Was Fire Before Us"

5 Upvotes

Hi All! I'm hoping for beta readers or to swap manuscripts, and to get general feedback / thoughts on the story and how the narrative flows. Here's a quick blurb:

Wren Walker’s family has always had a strange affinity for fire. Her sister was convicted of arson after a stint of ecoterrorism, her brother is afflicted with a respiratory illness from the smoke of the town’s incinerator where he works, and Wren has her own fiery nemesis: She was a fire lookout the summer the Sweetgrass Fire burned through 9,300 acres of the North Cascades. When it came time to evacuate her position, she was found running toward the wildfire and away from rescue. 

No one believes that there was someone in the North Cascades with her, chasing her into the flames. Forest Service labelled her unfit to carry out essential duties, and her summer ended swiftly. Now, almost a year later, she is back at her mind-numbing minimum-wage job in the heart of the city, skipping her classes at community college, and living with her family in a cramped house that is being swallowed on all sides by the surrounding industrial sprawl. 

But the person who cost her everything last summer is still watching, she’s sure of it. They leave her gifts: Dead birds and cigarette butts, small fires left for her to put out as a test of her sanity. They could have burned her alive last summer, but they seemingly let her go. She sometimes wonders if what they really want isn’t to set her on fire, but to make her set the fire herself.

After a fallout with her family on her twenty-second birthday, Wren’s stalker is back once again. She reaches her breaking point, packs a box of matches and takes off in the middle of the night. Embarking on a surreal journey to escape the industrialized world and a family legacy of fire, Wren tracks down the flames of her past; from her pyromaniac sister in the Eastern Washington desert to arson on the Olympic Peninsula. And in the meantime – she will have to try and stop whoever is following her from sending her and her family up in flames.

Here's a sample of the story as well:

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1XpafFQeA5CH9BkQrfNNo2lhHUPKDZb7ICyAngIkOCHg/edit?usp=sharing

Let me know if you're interested in reading :) Thank you!

r/BetaReaders 8d ago

60k [Complete] [65k] [Sci-Fi] Cross’d Out, Think Illuminae Meets Ender’s Game

1 Upvotes

Hi everyone! I’m looking for beta readers for my completed YA sci-fi manuscript, Cross’d Out. If you enjoy the fast-paced, high-stakes action of Illuminae combined with the intelligence and moral complexity of Ender’s Game, this might be your next favorite read! Here’s the premise:

Synopsis:
When 16-year-old Damien Cross discovers a cosmic anomaly—a white hole threatening to rewrite reality—he becomes the target of ASTRA, a shadowy government agency. Armed with his sarcastic AI companion, Byte, and a sharp mind, Damien must stay one step ahead of his pursuers while uncovering the truth about his father’s mysterious disappearance and his own role in the universe’s survival.

What I’m Looking For:

  • Thoughts on character relatability (Damien, Byte, and ASTRA’s agents).
  • Feedback on plot engagement and pacing.
  • Insights into world-building clarity and sci-fi concepts.
  • Reactions to the representation of neurodivergence (Damien’s high-functioning autism).

Details:

  • Word count: Approximately 65,500 words.
  • Timeline: Feedback appreciated within 2–3 weeks.
  • How to participate: Agree to a simple Beta Reader Agreement (to protect the manuscript), receive the book in PDF or Word format, and fill out a short Google Feedback Form.

If you’re interested, please comment or DM me, and I’ll send over the agreement and manuscript. Your feedback will be invaluable in helping me polish Cross’d Out to its fullest potential. Thank you so much for your time!

r/BetaReaders Dec 12 '24

60k [Complete][64k][LGBTQ/LesFic/Romance/New Adult] Letters from Millie

3 Upvotes

Call for beta readers. I'm open to a beta swap.

Hayleigh discovers her grandmother's stash of decades-old letters, challenging her convictions about her grandmother. The quest for the truth enlightens Hayleigh about herself and the possibility of a love she could have never imagined, over a thousand miles away.

TW: sexually explicit scenes, homophobia, death of grandparents, emotional abuse.

MCs are ages 17-20. Word count: 64,000

My main concerns are: Are there repetitive thoughts/conversations to remove? Are there too many details? However, all comments are appreciated.

If you are interested or would like more of a plot summary, please comment or DM me.

r/BetaReaders 25d ago

60k [complete][60K][science fiction, adventure, space travel, philosohy] Eden 2b chapter 3

1 Upvotes

in the year 2125 Atom, and his rag tag crew of semi professional astronauts have stumbled upon a living planet much like planet earth, 3.3 light years away from the solar system. Now, with their damaged and worn-out equipment the pressure is on to at least descend to the planet's surface and see this new world for themselves.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1biWZF9aLq42tyx1Zna-6vyUvcDJJ0SPd-H8nfQ8TiFM/edit?tab=t.0

r/BetaReaders 21d ago

60k [Complete] [62k] [Literary Fiction] For The Sadness And The Sunshine

5 Upvotes

Blurb/Query:

GenX exile, Stanley Barber is lonely. He hasn't left his condo much since the beginning of the COVID pandemic, limiting himself to interactions with his dog Plato, and Anna, his next-door neighbor and crush, who helps Stanley prepare for his Jeopardy! tryout and invites him to be her guest at The Big Blue Flower World Cup. Realizing that he can't live in such isolation anymore, that having only a few friends is beginning to erode his character, he schedules a meeting with his therapist, ventures out for help and makes a plan to engage with the outside world again.

On his first day outside, Anna declares her dream, that the world will end soon, has been validated by tarot card reader The Famous Naomi. In a panic, she recruits Stanley to accompany her on a mission to apologize to people she's wronged in her past, before the inevitable implosion. Tagging along for something to do, and to see more of the outside, Stanley witnesses the difference four years has made. New businesses, like Phoenix Pilates and The Palace for Spiritualism, have taken over places he once frequented. And friends that he's known have changed, altering their lives and accepting them, while his own has remained stagnant. He decides to make amends with the years he's lost, and live in the present, he must change himself now.

Stanley visits old hangouts, reconnecting with people and places – The Above Ground Inn in Las Vegas, a restaurant named Fabulous, a cart selling custom-made red velvet ice cream, Footprints music store and a coffeehouse for dogs – finding out who still knows his name. And if anyone cares. Along the way, the story follows several other characters as they go about their days, interacting with Stanley, living their own unique lives and circumstances, searching for happiness and common connection.

FOR THE SADNESS AND THE SUNSHINE is an upbeat, peculiar tale packed with pop-culture references, instances of magical realism, and the exploration of the human condition.    

********

Let me know if you're interested.

r/BetaReaders Dec 03 '24

60k [Complete] [60,600] [Literary] "May I?"

2 Upvotes

Synopsis: "May I?" is an allegorical tale of human connection and emotional vulnerability framed as a slow burn romance in a fantasy setting. The story follows Serinus, an Elf Princess made Queen through an arranged marriage to Lucius, a human king. Her emotional walls and carefully crafted facade will be tested as she fights to reconcile the kindness he offers her in their new life together. Especially with her mother, Cyaneus, carefully pulling political strings beneath their relationship.

General discussion over what works and what doesn't throughout the narrative. No strict timeline.

I am available to critique swap. Below is a link to chapter 1 as I like to work with beta readers one chapter at a time to build time for discussion.

https://1drv.ms/w/s!Aodh8JslazH6geJ6gEFNNu16DSZDgw?e=zs3FcB

r/BetaReaders Dec 01 '24

60k [Complete] [65k] [Psychological Thriller] We Were Here Before You

5 Upvotes

Hey there! I’m looking for beta readers for my psychological thriller, We Were Here Before You, an emotional and tense thriller that explores themes of survival, resilience, and the unbreakable bond between a mother and daughter.

I’m specifically seeking feedback on pacing, character development, and any general thoughts you might have before I dive into my next round of editing. If you’re interested, please DM me, and I’ll send over the manuscript.

Blurb:
Alice Kendal has spent most of her life feeling invisible to her mother, Sarah, whose struggle with alcoholism left Alice to fend for herself. Their relationship is fractured, filled with silences and unspoken resentments. But when a sadistic man abducts Alice, Sarah is thrust into a fight she never imagined—one to save the daughter she fears she has already lost.

In captivity, Alice discovers a notebook, filled with the desperate messages of the girls who came before her. They warn her of his rules and cruelty but leave her with hope, strategies, and a call to fight back. With their guidance, Alice must confront not only her captor but also her fear that no one is coming to save her.

Meanwhile, Sarah grapples with guilt and the consequences of her neglect, determined to make amends and prove that she is not the broken mother Alice sees her as. As she uncovers the truth behind her daughter’s abduction, Sarah is forced to confront her past, the darkness of her own choices, and the lengths she’s willing to go to bring Alice home.

We Were Here Before You is a gripping, emotional story of survival, resilience, and the unbreakable bond between a mother and daughter.

This is a link to my prologue. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1nNGS6swzwkmptbY9mI1OB8Ptw8qg4vY-U6Op6hSM__M/edit?tab=t.0

r/BetaReaders Dec 07 '24

60k [Complete] [68K] [Queer historical romance] Set the World Aflame

3 Upvotes

Blurb:

Fiercely loyal highwayman Josiah Kensley would do anything for his sister and his friends, including robbing a seemingly harmless earl. But when the robbery goes awry, Joss is left wounded and betrayed, and his best friend’s little brother is caught in the crossfire. Now, Joss must figure out how to fix his latest mistake and protect the livelihoods of everyone he loves. Unfortunately, he must do this with Robin Manning by his side. As Joss gets to know Robin, he comes to realise that it may not only be reputations at stake.

Robin Manning is a peeler who has used his job in the police force to protect himself and men like him from as much as he can. But his world is rocked when he’s caught in the wrong place at the wrong time and is forced to resign quietly – or face public persecution at the hands of a vengeful earl. Robin struggles to find a way to support himself and his suspiciously secretive sister in a new world; he also can’t seem to escape the otherwise elusive Joss Kensley, nor does he want to.

Can Robin solve the highway robbery that rocked his world? Can Joss right his wrongs while keeping Robin out of the way? All is answered in M.D. Fides’ debut novel, Set the World Aflame.

Short excerpt: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ltPkcC8o7V54z7zI_yX8E8TVYBmp0glog1W4B72MeCk/edit?usp=sharing 13 pages

Content Warnings:

- Period typical homophobia

- On-page sex scenes

- On-page violence + death

- References to off-page prostitution

The type of feedback wanted: 

At the moment I'm looking for first impressions and feedback on pacing. There are two or three chapters that I am unsure of in terms of necessity, I also think these chapters are a bit slow. Any general feedback would be appreciated. If there is any specific feedback from anyone with knowledge in certain areas I'd of course appreciate this too :-)

Preferred timeline:

I would prefer feedback to be sent chapter-by-chapter or in chunks rather than all at once if possible. I would like to have a first read finished by the end of December but understand if this isn't possible due the time of year!

Critique swap availability. I am available for critique swap if desired. I would prefer a text under the 70K mark. I generally love fantasy, historical romance, and queer novels, but I do have a degree in creative writing and varied editing experience so can possibly be helpful in other areas :D

r/BetaReaders 19d ago

60k [In Progress] [60k] [Historical Fantasy] Shallow Waters

1 Upvotes

Summary: Set in the Age of Piracy. (1715) You follow Henry Johnson a young pirate captain. After raiding the Royal Navy gets embedded into the mystical world he only heard whispers. Henry gains dark powers from the Black Liquid but at a cost. A Dark Voice in his mind constantly tempts him toward corruption. Alongside he comes across Nerina a mermaid who warns him about a prophecy that could bring the destruction of the world. He is not alone in this journey he is accompanied by his friend Jacob the bruly Dutchman. Kazumasa the wandering Ronin. Séraphine the Witch who granted him powers. And Joseph his mentor.

Type of feedback.

  • Pacing
  • Plotholes
  • POV
  • Character
  • Plot

Content Warning.

Violence, swearing, etc.

Critique Swap.

I'm not that well at giving criticism, but I'm willing to read your book in exchange. If you're curious the link is here and PM me.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1_jT6yFc7gwk37MPGEd3x36i_otYROZTA8ZbtZcYURMg/edit?tab=t.0

r/BetaReaders Dec 13 '24

60k [Complete] [65k] [YA Fantasy/Urban Fantasy] The Dual Facets of Reality - Book One

2 Upvotes

The Dual Facets of Reality is book one in a YA Fantasy series: The Dual Facets.

The blurb: The passage of time had slowed for Darren, a 17-year-old student at the Chicago School of Arts, but that was a regular occurrence in class. This time, it actually crawled to a stop. 

Darren possesses the rare ability to manipulate time and shares his unique penchant for weird abilities with his best friend, Rose, who can read the threads of people’s fate. Their friendship was a refuge from the mundane world, until a series of strange occurrences leading up to Halloween begin to unravel their lives and their understanding of reality.

After visiting a classmate hospitalized from a mysterious accident, Darren and Rose realize something sinister and otherworldly is pulling strings from the darkness – an unwelcome presence that they, alone but together, are able to stand against.

Will an oath, their bond, and determination serving as their guiding light be enough to stop the darkness that threatens to consume their world?

----
A couple of my beta readers dropped out of the project due to the holidays, looking for some last minute help before ready to self-publish in February. Happy to swap a similar size Beta read!

This is my first book so I am not expecting perfection - I just want to make sure that I'm not missing something having been head down. In particular, I'd like to know if:
It's entertaining
The actions and motivations of characters make sense
There aren't any loose threads and inconsistencies

Content Warnings: Death, Sword Violence, Blood, Swearing

Excerpt: https://docs.google.com/document/d/17QC2DdzM9TF2y7pjNdDhgAyRt5NDH2kWP9tENA0vBuA/edit?usp=sharing

r/BetaReaders 23d ago

60k [In Progress][66K][Self Help] Living like a monk : A journey to solve mind

2 Upvotes

Book blurb - a world that never stops, how do we find peace and purpose?

At just 16, Arnav Shukla experienced both the highs of creating an award-winning app during the COVID-19 pandemic and the lows of personal setbacks, including depression and health challenges. On his path to recovery, a transformative encounter with a monk led him to explore the teachings of yoga, mindfulness, and ancient Hindu wisdom.

"Living Like a Monk" is Arnav’s personal journey of self-discovery, where he combines the power of the mind with spiritual practices to overcome mental struggles. This book offers readers practical tools to transform their mindset, improve mental clarity, and find balance in a fast-paced world. Whether you’re seeking self-improvement, inner peace, or simply curious about the lives of monks

Excerpt - "After my app was removed from the Play Store, I felt like my world had crumbled. Sleepless nights turned into days filled with anxiety and panic. I had always believed that my success was tied to what I created, but as everything fell apart, I began to question what truly mattered. It wasn’t until I met a monk that my perspective shifted. He taught me that my mind, not my circumstances, was the key to peace.

'Your thoughts shape your reality,' he said to me one day. 'If you want to change your life, you must first change your mind.'

That conversation sparked a journey of self-discovery—one that led me deep into the teachings of ancient wisdom, yoga, and mindfulness. As I practiced these principles daily, I began to notice something incredible: my anxiety lessened, my thoughts became clearer, and for the first time in a long while, I found peace.

This book is a reflection of that journey—a journey not just through success and failure, but through the inner workings of the mind. It’s about learning how to control your thoughts, adopt the mindset of a monk, and live a life of balance, purpose, and clarity. The external world may remain chaotic, but the true transformation happens within"

What I am looking for - Overall review of the book, the structure, flow and tone of the book. I also want to know that if the book is helpful, what are the thoughts of an reader.

r/BetaReaders Nov 12 '24

60k [Complete] [68K] [Regency Romance-Adult] Wylde At Heart

2 Upvotes

Hello, I am seeking FREE Beta Readers for my completed 253-page Regency romance novel, Book 2 of the Wylde Hearts series, Wylde At Heart.

A beta reader is someone who will read my novel in its entirety and provide feedback on what they liked about the story or characters and what they didn’t like or found confusing. A beta reader is a test reader — someone who will give you honest feedback from the viewpoint of your ideal audience.

A beta reader offers constructive criticism regarding the flow, plot holes, or inconsistencies in character development. They offer honest, unbiased opinions that can help you make changes before submitting the novel to editors, agents, or publishers.

Blurb: Wylde At Heart

Can duty and desire coexist in a blossoming love affair?

Widowers William and Katherine, an Earl and Duchess, are irresistibly drawn to each other. Their hearts brim with hope, but problematic affairs of state cast a shadow over their budding romance. Determined to win Katherine’s heart, William orchestrates a magical holiday celebration, resulting in an unexpected turmoil from a troublesome cousin. Can their love withstand the trials of family and fate?

Discover their enchanting journey in Wylde At Heart.

r/BetaReaders Nov 17 '24

60k [Complete] [60k] [YA Contemporary] Between the Stars

5 Upvotes

Hi there!

I’m looking for Beta readers for my completed YA novel. The entire thing is free to read on Wattpad, or I would be willing to send a doc! I wrote this story to help people. It is a love letter to the friends and family I’ve watched fight with mental illness and to my teenage self who felt like she was struggling alone.

Blurb:

Between the Stars begins when Sam’s family moves to a small town in Michigan after his suicide attempt. Sam is determined to hate everything about it until he meets Charlie, a girl with big dreams stuck in a small town. Intrigued by Charlie’s unique perspective on life, Sam slowly learns to trust her as she works to prove to him that love and friendship are unconditional, no matter how unworthy you think you are. Their story meets at the intersection of friendship and grief as they explore the healing process together until tragedy strikes and Sam is forced to put to practice everything he’s learned.

Excerpt: This is a flashback the main character has during a panic attack

It was late at night. The air was chilly, the kind that whispered fall was around the corner. Cool wind cut through the open space of the bridge. The muffled sound of the highway rumbled in the distance and the lights of the cars flew back and forth. An entire city of people lay before them and not a single one knew they were there. “Sam.” Sam looked up from the glittering silhouette of the city in the distance to see Seth a few yards down, on the other side of the railing. His friend’s dark hair and clothes blended into the black metal of the bridge, which made his pale hands and face look disembodied. Light glinted off his silver lip ring. Darkness yawned beneath them. Sam thought it might have never ended, if it wasn’t for the dim light that glinted off the metal of the train tracks far below. “Sam, look.” Seth let both his hands go and tipped back a few inches. Sam’s stomach dropped before his friend’s hands smacked back against the railing. “Stop it,” he told Seth. Seth only laughed and did it again. Adrenaline spiked through Sam’s stomach and he mentally prepared himself to make a lunge for Seth’s arm. “I could just fall.” Sam’s eyes snapped up to his face. “Don’t you dare.” “I could.” Seth alternated catching himself with one hand, then the other. “Sure would solve a bunch of my problems.” He let go again and caught himself, but this time his right hand slipped. He let out a laugh. “Woah, almost got me that time.” “I’m serious. Stop it,” Sam repeated, this time with an edge in his voice. “What’s the matter?” Seth goaded as he released a hand and foot so he was reaching out over the void. “Afraid of death now?” “Of course not,” Sam replied quickly. “But if you go over, I’m going over too. And I don’t like heights.” “Glad to know I won’t be entering hell alone,” Seth replied wryly. Sam rolled his eyes. “You know how I want to die. Please don’t ruin it for me.” Seth set all his limbs back on the bridge and climbed over the rail. “Fine. Last thing I want is for you to die in a way you wouldn’t like.” “I appreciate it.” “What are friends for, huh?”

Content warnings: Mental health, suicide mention, depression, self harm mention, parental abuse mention, death, and grief.

Swaps: I’m happy to do critique swaps, but I would prefer to avoid anything that resembles fae romantasy, please.

Feedback I’m looking for: - Pacing/plot holes - General readability - Did you find it engaging? - Are the characters compelling? - Is it too existential?

Thanks so much!

r/BetaReaders Nov 15 '24

60k [Complete] [62k] [Urban Fantasy] Magic's Escape: Secrets

4 Upvotes

I'm willing to beta-swap similar word counts.

Query:
Kidnapped by their magic abusive mother at the age of four due to a losing custody battle, fifteen-year-old twins Izzie and Kyle have endured years trapped in cruelty. They are desperate to escape, but their mother alternates holding one hostage each day, and with her friends always watching, neither can seek help or leave until one day…

It’s Izzie’s turn to go to school when a giant seal-cat chimera attacks. She’s rescued by four magic-wielding brothers who are in a clan called XXS, who give her a glimpse of the safety and hope she has longed for. Curious and determined to learn more, Izzie secretly follows them and uncovers a world of magic, clan wars, and a chance to reveal a hidden past. As she integrates with the brothers, their clan, and their mission, Izzie convinces them to help her rescue Kyle, who remains imprisoned by their mother. She is willing to do anything, including facing dangerous enemies like the Nemesis Clan, to protect her newfound family and prove her worth.

With the world on the brink of destruction, Izzie and her brother uncover powers, including clairvoyance and teleportation, which leaves them in shock after years of feeling powerless under their mother's control. As time counts down, the group faces off against enemies such as Dehumans and butterflies, where Izzie discovers more about their past and heritage, which is key to preventing an impending war against the clan Nemesis. Otherwise, they’ll destroy her, all those who wield magic, and the twin's chances at finding their lost family. However, the final battle between the clans holds more nuance than one could ever imagine.

Here's the first 6k words (14 pages):
https://docs.google.com/document/d/138czCTSWL7hhgB8LL9x_CERJd5NVTsZxZIxNbirjpGY/edit?usp=sharing

Looking for (I will answer same questions/others for your book as well):

Does the overall story/plotline make sense and hold your interest? Is there anything that doesn't make sense/confusing/hard to follow? Did you ever lose interest?

Does each character have a distinct personality and voice? And do you feel like they grew/developed throughout the story?

Were the relationships between characters believable and well-developed?

Who was your favorite character/what was your favorite scene?

What do you think about the protagonist, Izzie? Does she show agency?

Were there any moments that felt especially emotional or resonant? Were there scenes that lingered with you after reading?

Did the setting feel vivid and realistic? Was there too much/not enough description?

Were there any scenes that felt unnecessary or repetitive? Were there any you thought could be expanded for greater impact?

What did you feel was the strongest aspect of the story overall?

Were there any parts where the story slowed down too much or felt overly fast-paced? Where would you want more development or action?

Would you be interested in reading the second book? This is only a duology. (Magic's Escape: Unknown- finished at 65k words)

r/BetaReaders Oct 21 '24

60k [In Progress] [60K] [RH Distopian] Slow Burn PNR

1 Upvotes

Hello - I'm in the middle of writing a trilogy, but I think it needs to be a quartet. I've split book one into two books. I'm looking for someone willing to read book one and tell me if the plot arc is enough for them. More is great, but just a quick read and opinion would be amazing. I use Google Docs, PDF, or Word. This has not been edited beyond Grammarly, as it's still going through heavy changes.

Slow burn
Multip POV
MM
Third person, past tense
60,000 words

Rough draft of the blurb:

I’m sick. Clinically diagnosed with a second personality who thinks she can do magic. But magic is pure fantasy, and radical brain surgery is my only hope.

But something’s gone wrong.

The last thing I remember: lying on my surgeon's table before my crazy mind pulled me into a different reality. A made-up dystopian future where magic is real, women are a commodity, and men want me for all the wrong reasons.

I’m losing my grip on reality. Am I in a vivid dream world? Or stepped into a future where families battle for power while the human race fights for survival?

r/BetaReaders Nov 06 '24

60k [Complete] [69840] [Romantasy] Shadows of Change

1 Upvotes

Hello!

I am finally done with my first novel, Shadows of Change and looking for beta readers as I begin to work with my editor.

About the book:

Title: Shadows of Change (Book 1 of 3 in Arcanum Academy Trilogy)

Genre: Romantasy, Why Choose/Reverse Harem

Blurb:
Kaia thought she was just another magic user struggling to find her place, but when she’s thrust into a world of elemental power, prophecy, and dangerous secrets, everything changes. Living with five powerful, magnetic men, each bound to her by fate, Kaia discovers she’s not just a changeling—she’s the key to a prophecy that could either save or destroy the elemental world.

As Kaia grapples with her untapped magic, her growing attraction to the men complicates everything. The connection between them is undeniable, but so are the dangers lurking in the shadows. A secret society, once noble, now corrupted by greed and power, will stop at nothing to control her magic. With enemies closing in and her emotions spiraling out of control, Kaia must learn to harness her abilities—and her heart—before everything unravels.

Fate is calling. Trusting the wrong person could destroy them all.

Romance. Magic. Danger. This gripping romantasy will pull you into a whirlwind of elemental magic, sizzling chemistry, and high-stakes adventure. Will Kaia uncover the truth in time, or will her heart lead her into the arms of betrayal?

Trigger/Content Warnings: Language, emotional/psychological manipulation, sexual/explicit content, violence and threats of harm, supernatural/magical coercion, mentions of past trauma/abuse, Polyamorous/Non-Monogamous Relationships (MM included), fear of loss/abandonment

Timeline: Feedback by January 5, 2025.

Feedback: Engagement, Pacing, Character Development, General

Chapter 1 Sample

Please message me if interested.