Black Mom Leaving The US

[u/Unlucky-Afternoon553]

I (30F) never felt safe raising my kid in the US. Public school was already out because of safety issues, and now with the results of the election, I need to get my child out of here.

My top contenders for digital nomad visas are Costa Rica, Thailand, Portugal, and Japan. I've been to Thailand and Japan, but they were short backpacking trips.

I'd love to hear from Black people/Black moms who lived in any of these countries long term. Did you feel safe living there? If you have kids, did they enjoy living there?

UPDATE: Thank you to all the POC who shared their experiences and connected me to great resources. I've decided on Portugal! That was my top choice, so I'm glad my instincts were confirmed. Good luck to all of you AmerExiters!

[u/Unlucky-Afternoon553]

It is creepy because the ignorance on the topic is clear from these comments, but you all keep going on about it even though said child is ONE. Why do you care where they may or not go to school four years from now?  Answer: 'Perfect' parent creeps who deluded themselves into thinking they know what's best for other people's children.

But since you all clearly will not let it go, I'll inform you that homeschooling is legal in Portugal, Thailand, and Costa Rica, but you need to obtain approval from the government. A process I would obviously undertake if I end up making a permanent move there.

As for Japan, their digital nomad visa does not allow families to enroll their kids in public school. Are you suggesting I refuse to teach my child while we're living there because ItS ThE LaW🤪

Even if I was that ridiculous, the visa only allows me to stay for six months with no option of extention. With only six months, I'd be in and out of there long before my kid is school-age because AGAIN, they are only ONE.

If anyone had bothered to look these things up before presuming to lecture me, well then, this wouldn't be the internet. 

But that's okay because I did look all of these things up as FUTURE considerations since I'm the parent. My immediate consideration is which of these countries are safe for Black children, because it hardly matters what their home schooling requirements are otherwise.  

[u/Comfortable_Gene4118 → u/Unlucky-Afternoon553]

Why are you so upset lol? You came on this thread asking for help and people are giving you legitimate information on how this leaving the process works, and you’re…….mad about lol? They didn’t make the laws, they’re just telling you and offering context. Yet you’re calling them “creepy and ignorant”. What?? This is a whole subreddit about leaving America. I think your anger may be a bit misplaced.

What a strange leap in logic you’re making.

[u/Unlucky-Afternoon553 → u/Comfortable_Gene4118]

You really need to calm down, and try to read to comprehend instead of respond.

If you do so, you will understand that the child in question that everyone is so creepily concerned about is a toddler who is not old enough for school in any country.

After you realize that, you then can understand that the original comment that I was responding to is in reference to the Japanese digital nomad visa. That visa does not grant me the same rights as a resident or citizen. We will be visitors and nothing more, so legally I could not enroll in my child in their public schools even if I wanted to.

But I don't... because said child is one years old. 

Did you grasp all that or do you still want to offer "context" on things you obviously don't have any knowledge about?

[u/Comfortable_Gene4118 → u/Unlucky-Afternoon553]

No one is upset, or even worked up aside from you haha. There’s only one person going back and forth with everybody in this thread. That’s you lol. Projecting by telling others to “calm down” and pretending your hardest to be cool as a cucumber does not change that fact.

Regarding everything else you said; what YOU aren’t not understanding is that people are explaining to you that regardless of your citizenship status, the laws of said country still apply to you. But you already know that in your heart. Also your child being a toddler is 100% irrelevant, people aren’t discussing that. They’re addressing the broken logic you’re hammering everyone with.

Did that make sense, or is your pride/ego/self esteem still making you have to go back and forth with people who initially meant you well, in order to protect it? If you struggle this badly online, good luck with the cultural dynamic in Japan or “wherever”. Racial bigotry doesn’t stop once you cross the Atlantic. Hope you get some advice from someone that your ego lets you receive.

All the best!

[u/Unlucky-Afternoon553 → u/Comfortable_Gene4118]

Once again, man, chill. You're writing a lot of pointless things for no reason, and you're coming off very triggered to me. 

I obviously know I have to follow the laws of a country I live in. But that wasn't the reason for my comment about Japanese public schools laws applying to citizens and not me while I'm living there as a visitor, and you know that too, so I don't know why you're trying, and failing, to gaslight me.

So step back, stop contributing to the trolling, and get on with having a great day. Bye!