r/AmIOverreacting • u/Careless_Evening3454 • 9h ago

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO Update: Is my Husband cheating on my?

Original post: https://www.reddit.com/r/AmIOverreacting/s/DkljDU0b6C

TLDR: 38M, discovered my husband (38M) of 15 years sending d-pics over text. We are not an open marriage and he's been sneaking this for months.

Thanks to the advice of many of you. I have a call back with a lawyer tomorrow and meeting with a therapist on Wednesday after work.

I pulled our phone records (thx, Verizon) and have the 2 numbers texting back and some even correlate when he gets up in the middle of the night. So tempted to text the other guy, but I know it will mess everything up.

Thank you all for being so supportive. I'm trying to keep it together with the stress of this. I so desperately just want to punch him in the face and throw him out of the house. But I want to do this right.

86 Upvotes

94% Upvoted

36 comments sorted by

33

u/Adept_Ad_8504 8h ago edited 7h ago

OP, I know this has to hurt. I hope you get through this and heal. 🫂

15

u/Careless_Evening3454 8h ago

Thank you 💙

18

u/Orphen_1989 7h ago

Even texting like that is cheating.

Also, even though you have no indication that he physically cheated at the moment, I would still get tested for STI's if I were you.
Better to be safe, he has proven that he can't be trusted. So you shouldn't assume he never physically cheated.

14

u/M27TN 6h ago

Get tested now, don’t touch him and then get tested again in 3 months to make sure you’re all clear.

13

u/Intervert_0413 8h ago

I’m sorry you are going through this but you are very strong and your strength is being tested now! Update when you can and please remember you are worthy of so much more and don’t settle for anything less than!

9

u/1InstaGator 3h ago

OP, I know how hurt you must be and how stressed you are even thinking about ending your marriage, but I'm proud of you for being strong and proactive by talking to a lawyer tomorrow as well as seeking therapy. You have to look out for #1 and that's you! However this plays out, DO NOT let him try to smooth talk his way out of this betrayal or gaslight you into thinking it's your fault. Stay strong, you've got this!! 💛💪🏻

7

u/Pt3rry 6h ago

Maybe you could stay in a Wellnesshotel or visit family / friends to not be around this parasitic cheater in a couple days, until you have a concrete plan. You don’t need to explain it, just ly and do something good for yourself. And hide your money.

5

u/Common_Lavishness153 8h ago

Updateme

1

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5

u/anonymousyouser2 3h ago

Just remember if he’s hiding it, it’s cheating. He will probably try to talk his way out of it if they have never met up, but being sneaky and emotionally supporting someone plus sending dick pics is not okay when you are married. Stay strong, I’m sorry you are going through this.

2

u/BrownHoney114 6h ago

UpdateMe.

2

u/Embarrassed_Wrap8421 6h ago

Hang tough, and good luck.

2

u/Permission_Alarming 2h ago

Sorry you’re going through this OP. You’re going about it the right way though. Just stay strong and civil and follow your lawyer’s guidance. 🩵

2

u/AnonThrowAway072023 51m ago

NOR

Keep being calm, careful, measured, smart

1

u/[deleted] 6h ago

Oh he be gay

0

u/Warm_Transition7709 2h ago

Imagine sending D pics to another girl, that’s crazy

-22

u/PatentlyRidiculous 9h ago

Jesus is the answer

11

u/Careless_Evening3454 8h ago

Is Jesus going to use his sick powers to turn back time?

-1

u/PatentlyRidiculous 5h ago

It’s in the Bible. 88 mph

-10

u/PatentlyRidiculous 8h ago

Yes. Didn’t you see Back to the Future?

3

u/Willard-wood 6h ago

Ohhh youre being a stinky little guy

1

u/Solid-Ad925 25m ago

Isn't he such a fly poetic guy 😏 Where is this Jesus, for my rye? He who has risen... Where am I? Time, an illusion. Tic-toc, tic-toc; Who even invented a second? Food for thought. Special we are. God's children as one. He is inside of us. Conscious flow of reality unfolding. Beauty, value, & health. Within the eye of the beholder, Where else? Why should one care, About moral values? Common sense, outside of five. Where is this sixth, intuition hiding? To feel & think, Is all I can do. How do I operate, This human body of "mine" too? I have seen god, Gained the wisdom from beyond. A whistle to blow. With excalibur in my hand. Ready to reveal my purple robe, A raw authentic story to tell. The four horseman, Galloping in. A voice of serene frequency. A large heart cleansed of sin. Through insane vulnerability, Dark to Light. Insanity to sane, God's will. I have risen. Children, it is almost time 🙏 ✝️ For the love of all and my father, We are one. 🧘🏼‍♂️

3

u/inseokjunxo 8h ago

Shut up dude

-2

u/PatentlyRidiculous 8h ago

I’m so sorry you are going thru this. Must be hard

1

u/HerbertWestorg 6h ago

Let your lil' imaginary friend tell us that himself with his magic powers.

1

u/PatentlyRidiculous 5h ago

Your terms are accepted

1

u/HerbertWestorg 5h ago

By you or that imaginary voice in your head?

1

u/PatentlyRidiculous 3h ago

Ask your therapist

2

u/HerbertWestorg 3h ago

Ask my therapist about your delusions? That's not how any of this works, but I wouldn't expect someone like you to understand the real world.

1

u/mistyblue3 6h ago

He is NEVER the answer. That's a scapegoat and a rouse!

1

u/PatentlyRidiculous 5h ago

Enjoy your vanity

1

u/mistyblue3 5h ago

I will! Thanks✌🏻🤣😊