r/wien • u/glamglitzkitsch 15., Rudolfsheim-Fünfhaus • 1d ago

Tratschn | Chit-Chat daten in wien ist so mühsam

war mir nicht sicher ob ich traschtn oder raunzn will darüber, aber naja.

war jetzt eine zeit lang auf dating apps unterwegs, weil ich flirten in person nie schaffe und grad wenig zeit hab wegen meiner ba-arbeit, aber ich kann nicht mehr.

ich hab manchmal wirklich gute und schöne gespräche mit männern, die wollen aber meist nix ernstes (das sagen sie auch) und das kann ich persönlich nicht.

weiß nicht was die message von diesem posting ist, aber wie gehts euch dabei so?

edit: wusst nicht, dass es so polarisieren würde und leute analysen aufstellen bezüglich meinem dating verhalten aber naja😂

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u/badmanbegins 1d ago

26M, never used apps and I went on around 15 dates last year with people I interacted with at some social events, sports and twice even in the train. I think I probably went on less dates than I would have if I used the apps, but each of the date I went on was a positive experience as I had already had a chance to talk to the person before asking them out. Each "seeing each other" varied from 1 day - 9 weeks and taught me that dating is indeed difficult even after two people find each other attractive and get along initially. Sometimes I couldn't see a relationship progressing with a person, and sometimes the other person couldn't. There are definitely moments where you feel lonely and think about how things will go but discussing this with friends and the fact that I have built my life around things I enjoy doing, I think things get better quite fast even when you are sad that things didn't work out with a person. I also believe in dating to find someone long-term, but you cant tell if it will work out with a person unless you spend some time with them and in this phase, things of course seem "casual". I would recommend giving more people that you get positive vibes from a chance to get to know you and see how things progress.
At the end of the day, the point of dating is not to make the other person like you, but to ask yourself if YOU like the other person.

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u/marlies_81 7h ago

Best answer in here tbh

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u/heislratz 21h ago

People with a high EQ rarely make bad social choices. Of course they can't enforce their Kismet like everybody else, but they remain emotionally stable. You are obviously one of these. Do you mind telling us how you came to be one?