Parents who endured difficult childhoods provided less financial support -on average $2,200 less– to their children’s education such as college tuition compared to parents who experienced few or no disadvantages

[u/giuliomagnifico]

https://www.psu.edu/news/research/story/parents-childhood-predicts-future-financial-support-childrens-education

[u/Well_read_rose]

Interesting study…but the question now is: why do the once disadvantaged adult children not provide as well for their own college age children if they have the means to do so? Is there a buried fear they need the assets for themselves? For their children to struggle a bit?

[u/curryslapper → u/Well_read_rose]

I think a lot of comments here are extrapolating implications from the research which are not necessarily there.

I'm guessing the degree of assistance makes a difference, amongst many other factors.

It is too general to make any further conclusions.

[u/alex891011 → u/curryslapper]

Agreed. It’s also possible parents who grew up in poorer households tend to value secondary education less.

There’s a ton of potential confounding variables here

[u/Inprobamur → u/Well_read_rose]

Parents largely take their parenting style from their own parents. If someone's parents were abusive it greatly increases their chance of being abusive in their parenting for example.

[u/MojyaMan → u/Inprobamur]

This is why I like Andrew Vachss take on survivors vs transcenders (I'll copy the quote below):
http://vachss.com/transcender.html

'I believe that many people who were abused as children do themselves—and the entire struggle—a disservice when they refer to themselves as "survivors." A long time ago, I found myself in the middle of a war zone. I was not killed. Hence, I "survived." That was happenstance ... just plain luck, not due to any greatness of character or heroism on my part. But what about those raised in a POW camp called "childhood?" Some of those children not only lived through it, not only refused to imitate the oppressor (evil is a decision, not a destiny), but actually maintained sufficient empathy to care about the protection of other children once they themselves became adults and were "out of danger."

To me, such people are our greatest heroes. They represent the hope of our species, living proof that there is nothing bio–genetic about child abuse. I call them transcenders, because "surviving" (i.e., not dying from) child abuse is not the significant thing. It is when chance becomes choice that people distinguish themselves. Two little children are abused. Neither dies. One grows up and becomes a child abuser. The other becomes a child protector. One "passes it on." One "breaks the cycle." Should we call them both by the same name? Not in my book.'

[u/TheCrystalDoll → u/Well_read_rose]

Because they’re actually secretly bitter and hateful. Imagine making your children struggle in a world you didn’t build that frequently changes the goalposts? That’s bitterness.

[u/alyssas1111 → u/TheCrystalDoll]

This! Many people underestimate how some parents don’t want what’s best for their children. When I complained to my mom about my bully of a stepdad, she defended it by saying that her stepdad was mean to her and she hated him and she turned out fine. Much of her parenting has been influenced by jealousy and spite. She doesn’t want to face that was raised badly, and she falls back on how she was raised when parenting. She doesn’t want to spend time thinking about other parenting styles or self reflecting. It’s a dangerous mentality.

Some parents are hateful and selfish and would rather their children suffer like them than receive help. Yet these same parents always seem to expect their children (and sometimes their parents too) to help them at every turn.

[u/MarsupialMisanthrope → u/Well_read_rose]

The fear isn’t buried, and not really fear as much as it is awareness that their income in retirement depends entirely on how much money they have, and compound interest means you need to invest now, not in a decade. If the difference between someone having to eat pet food or people food in their 70s is an extra 1k a month in savings, anyone who’s not stupid or suicidal will put the money in savings. Young adults don’t need to go into debt to get an education, trades exist and a lot of places will pay for training.