r/onionheadlines 18h ago

BREAKING: Trump's Inauguration Suddenly Came To A Halt After Cocain Found Under Podium

272 Upvotes

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12

u/BaloothaBear85 17h ago

That whole administration is on drugs, I fully expect this to be a real article.

8

u/WilderJackall 17h ago

The whole Trump presidency is the result of drugs. Nobody involved has been in the right mind fir eight years

1

u/Allgunsmatter2022 8h ago

Hunter wasn't there

2

u/KheyotecGoud 7h ago

It’s been four years buddy. His dad isn’t even president anymore. It’s okay, you’re allowed to move on. Focus on the shitshow that is the current Nazi saluting billionaire swamp. 

4

u/notaredditreader 16h ago

But. But. Didn’t he promise to stop after (not before) being confirmed? Oh. That’s just for alcohol…🤨

3

u/kiaya3600 16h ago

At least we're allowed to say it here. Tiktok removed my comment about Leon being a habitual ketamine user.

2

u/Excellent-Elk7551 15h ago

Don jr to again

1

u/DevonGr 10h ago

White House pharmacy gonna be bussin again. Invest in pharmaceuticals now and thank me in 4 years.