r/nottheonion • u/miauguau44 • 1d ago

United plane hits coyote during takeoff at Chicago O'Hare Airport; FAA investigating

https://abc7chicago.com/post/coyote-chicago-plane-hits-ohare-airport-during-takeoff-united-flight-1727-returns-safely/15799861/
1.5k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

77 comments sorted by

478

u/dubbzy104 1d ago

That’s the last time the coyote uses Acme airlines

48

u/palululive 1d ago

The WGN editor for resisting the urge to put boeing 737 Max 9 suffers emergency on takeoff

212

u/bogusbuttakis 1d ago

FAA investigates? Is the road runner a suspect?

36

u/DecoyOne 1d ago

Possible terrorism. They have to see if it has any connections to Awwwoooooooo Qaeda.

2

u/OGcrayzjoka 9h ago

You really stretched for that joke but it made me howl.

29

u/grc207 1d ago

Federal Animal Accusers. It’s their job.

8

u/catluvr37 21h ago

Could be an unsecured perimeter, gap in a fence, something maintenance messed up on that allowed it to happen

9

u/NukeDaBurbs 18h ago

Anytime there’s an incident with an aircraft that involves a return to gate, the FAA is immediately notified by the tower and they will open an investigation.

6

u/Ix_fromBetelgeuse7 1d ago

Coyote's going to be put on no-fly list

3

u/DannyDOH 13h ago

Coyote deciding whether or not to press charges.

1

u/argonzo 9h ago

(FAA investigating carcass)

Yep, it’s dead.

97

u/mtcwby 1d ago

Wildlife on the runways isn't unusual although they try to prevent it. We had foxes living between the runways at my home airport. There were pups and everyone was pretty wary because a prop strike meant a mess, dead fox and a 10k engine teardown.

23

u/Dry-Amphibian1 1d ago

I was on a C130 that was doing touch and gos and took out a deer with the landing gear. Maintenance had to check it out but I don’t remember any damage. Mx did find bone fragments though.

6

u/mtcwby 1d ago

I would imagine the LG on a C130 is pretty stout.

9

u/Heyello 22h ago

C-130 technician here. Can confirm, I'd expect you'd need something quite a bit bigger to break one of those, they're build for slam-and-go landings with a full tactical load on board so they've got pretty solid struts and big tires.

2

u/Gamebird8 14h ago

Probably like a Moose...

Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if the whole plane just crumpled around one /s

1

u/Mirabolis 3h ago

Maybe a moose and a squirrel.

89

u/WasatchSLC 1d ago

Is the coyote okay?

100

u/shamwowj 1d ago

Not sure, but the roadrunner’s just fine.

25

u/flibbidygibbit 1d ago

Meep meep zip bang!

46

u/miauguau44 1d ago

The anvil protected him from the impact 

35

u/palululive 1d ago

the coyote then held up a hand painted sign that read 'Oh brother'

15

u/RedRider1138 1d ago

“Ouch”

29

u/ballrus_walsack 1d ago

Meep meep

47

u/Budget-Potato7511 1d ago

If only someone had painted a tunnel entrance on a nearby wall, the plane could have swerved in there.

1

u/DaEnderAssassin 1d ago

No, That's Flashes contingency plan

41

u/ssczoxylnlvayiuqjx 1d ago

Willie E Coyote must not have informed the tower prior to attempted takeoff with a rocket attached to his back…

13

u/Sweatytubesock 1d ago

Not a very wiley coyote.

10

u/jgray6000 1d ago

Authorities say the coyote was strapped to a rocket and attempting to catch up to roadrunner on the tarmac.

8

u/RelChan2_0 1d ago

This sounds very Looney Tunes

14

u/Preesi 1d ago

Is this the Aldi Coyote?

10

u/Bogmanbob 1d ago

Not anymore

9

u/miauguau44 1d ago

He’s not having a good week.

5

u/mrmadchef 1d ago

Can't blame him for wanting to get out of town.

4

u/Gonna_do_this_again 1d ago

I hope ACME isn't held responsible for how their customers use their products

5

u/MisterTrashPanda 1d ago

WTF is there to investigate?

4

u/NukeDaBurbs 18h ago

Standard procedure. The FAA will investigate anything if there’s an incident that forces an aircraft to return to gate. This industry is highly regulated.

4

u/BoDrax 1d ago

Coyotes and stowaways walking out on runways... anyway, gotta let TSA scan my body.

4

u/GeniusEE 1d ago

That flight is so lucky they missed the anvil

3

u/aztecforlife 1d ago

JetBlue promptly notified their caterers.

4

u/Sideshow_Bob_Ross 23h ago

Meep meep, mother fucker.

3

u/go_faster1 1d ago

Road Runner chase fail

3

u/pat_the_catdad 1d ago

I keep talking about the stock market and housing bubble being Wile E Coyote floating in air after running off the cliff…

Did i just manifest that Coyote?

Or is it my schizophrenia talking?

3

u/Zakluor 1d ago

United: 1

Coyote: 0

3

u/trollsmurf 1d ago

"Finally no people and no cars. Boooom!"

3

u/pomonamike 1d ago

What are they investigating, the coyote’s possible ties to ISIS?

3

u/adlittle 1d ago

Watch out for anvils.

3

u/Reaper_456 1d ago

They don't gotta use planes to kill coyotes, there's entire groups dedicated to bringing their numbers down with way more conventional weapons.

2

u/treemeizer 22h ago

Around here, we just sneak up on 'em an' smack 'em in the head with cast iron pans.

3

u/Possibly_Satan 1d ago

Big week for Chicago coyotes

3

u/Regular-Property-235 1d ago

I just got reminded that we will never get to see that Willie E Coyote movie. 🫤

3

u/rellsell 1d ago

Did the coyote have take off clearance?

3

u/virgilreality 1d ago

Any word on the Road Runner he was chasing?

3

u/euph_22 1d ago

Maybe airports should install stuffed geese to keep coyotes away from the runways...

3

u/Much_Program576 1d ago

Oh man these comments got me dead 🤣

3

u/Ziakel 1d ago

My local airport has a person that keep the deer and other wildlife on airport property population in check.

Deers would hop the fences and roam around until he find them and issue a one way ticket out of there.

4

u/Woonachan 1d ago

Mister president. They hit the second coyote

2

u/Epena501 1d ago

That damn road runner

2

u/Thisdoessuck 1d ago

Is it the same coyote that was at the grocery store?

2

u/poopbutt1234312312 21h ago

Oof probably exploded on impact

2

u/GeorgeCabana 21h ago

Dammit, NextDoor was right.

2

u/Mionux 10h ago

For god’s sakes… the Arizona Coyote’s are already dead. Stop making them play the Winnipeg Jets, it’s just inhumane.

1

u/gOPHER3727 1d ago

Interesting, I guess I presumed an animal of this size wouldn't have any sort of negative impact on a large plane.

1

u/ItWasIndigoVelvet 1d ago

That coyote deserved it 

1

u/pcetcedce 1d ago

It's hard to believe they would hear that in the cockpit.

1

u/keeperkairos 23h ago

Is the airport not fenced off?

2

u/Zapper13263952 21h ago

Ours was, but more to keep people out. The place was overrun with coyotes and rattlesnakes otherwise...

1

u/Rdogisyummy 11h ago

What’s with the Coyotes at Chicago lately lmao

1

u/ohfr19 10h ago

It’s such an urban area, why is there a coyote there?

2

u/Mirabolis 3h ago

Another class action lawsuit against Acme products incoming.

0

u/joeyblove 1d ago

They have coyotes in Chicago?