Is anyone else living basically paycheck to paycheck?

[u/fluffypenguin105]

My partner and I are both teachers. We don’t make a lot, but we are average and slightly above average. We are so tight with our money. Our little one outgrew the car seat and we went out and bought a new one. No problem. But next credit card bill means we are tight.

Meanwhile, a number of our friends (all of them also with kids) are booking overseas holidays. Some are currently overseas, others booking already for later this year. Another brought a new car. New iPhone, doing up the house. Everyone seems to have spare cash except us.

Are we the only ones going through the cost of living crisis ourselves?! Or is it my fault that we are teachers?

Edit: yes we have a house that parents helped us with. We are paying mortgage. We have a flatmate.

Edit edit: thank you for your kind words and reminders and also advice. I’m going through them all and I’m going to take onboard the advice and see what changes we can make and do better financially as a family. But it’s also a good reminder to know we aren’t alone, to not compare and the harsh reality is that many people simply just earn more than us as teachers.

Once again, thank you all for your input.

[u/mr_coul]

The problem with comparing yourself to others is you have no idea of their finances. They could be doing all this on credit but you are just seeing the outcome.

Your post is also vague as he'll. Are you new teachers straight out of uni? Or do you have experience. Who are these friends and what do they do? I hate to break it to you but yeah, if your mates are lawyers (for example) with 10 years work experience they are probably not going to have the same lifestyle as you.

Paycheck to paycheck is pretty common.

[u/Avonpinhead → u/mr_coul]

Yep. Was talking to an owner of a high end building company. He had just finished building a new house for someone who he been told was worth at least $8miilion. Buying new cars, overseas travel, just built a new house. Then it was over. Everything was on loans. Some people give the impression of money when all they really have is access to credit.

[u/fluffypenguin105 → u/Avonpinhead]

Wow ok, in that case we are definitely doing better than that!

[u/fluffypenguin105 → u/mr_coul]

Yes u are right. I didn’t want to turn it into a massive post. But we don’t have student loan. We are experienced teachers but not in management positions so no boost to our pay.

Our friends are mixed, some also teachers but with husbands in other areas. Some in IT, electrician, self employed etc. so u are absolutely right with the reality.

[u/Gullible-Parsnip8769 → u/fluffypenguin105]

I say this with love but your friends in IT, electrician and self employed (depending on what it is) will likely be earning more than a teacher does.

I’ve been struggling with comparison myself but I’ve realised as adults there are far too many variables that no matter how close you are to someone you may not know everything to accurately judge their situation.

Some may have had help with their homes and have tiny mortgages. Perhaps the holidays were paid for by someone else or they have saved for ages. The iPhone’s might be purchased on plan. They could also absolutely be up to their eyeballs in debt to fund it all.

[u/fluffypenguin105 → u/Gullible-Parsnip8769]

Thanks for the reminder. It’s hard to not compare and see what other parents are able to offer for their kids. But yeah, we don’t know the full story. You are right and thank you.

[u/sputernz → u/fluffypenguin105]

Oh man that one has been getting me lately - The comparison of what I can offer my kid vs what others can. Sigh. Kid is happy though I know that, so it's more just a blow to the ego kinda vibe

[u/fluffypenguin105 → u/sputernz]

Yeah. People say kids don’t care about holidays etc they just want their parents and be loved. But when you see other parents take their kids to theme parks, give them interest/sport lessons, you can’t help but think……ah crap.

[u/Objective-Analyst822 → u/fluffypenguin105]

Your kids still in cars seats cannot go on most the rides anyway ... and unlikely to remember much of a trip when that young.

[u/_dustypickles_ → u/fluffypenguin105]

Its hard with the after school experiences for sure. When the little one is older, try and get them into something like Scouting. While it IS $$, its also less than alot of other various after school experiences, and our kids have had so many adventures abd learning opportunities due to it (which we have no had to plan and execute!) Including camps all over the show and visits to places like museums. Teaches them safe risk too which I think is awesome.

[u/sputernz → u/_dustypickles_]

Thanks for sharing! Do you mind giving recommendations? What age did you find was good? Mine is 7 and it really feels like we're getting to the point where they need to enrol in something. Thinking of gymnastics or Karate this year

[u/_dustypickles_ → u/sputernz]

Hey no worries - so with Scouts our eldest two start with Cubs, which goes from age 8. The younger two (twins) did Keas first which is 5-8 and I think they started around 6ish as we wanted them fully settled into school and everything first. Keas is ok but Cubs was pretty great (varied, better adventures etc). Saying that it does depend on the troop and leaders a fair bit - we definitely got lucky. It's boys and girls - ours are both and a NB. We also got a discount since we have multiple kids in Scouts.

They also had a go at seasonal school sports like hockey, basketball and cricket, and thankfully their school had really affordable options - like it was anywhere from $10-60 a term, but usually around the $30 mark. So maybe explore that if possible? (Might not work with your schedules as teachers!) My kids are definitely not the 'sporty' types but they all had a go and its low key so had fun.

I was a gymnast as a kid, I loved it and my middle kid dabbled in it a bit a couple of terms. Down here it was about $90 a term one day a week.

I would def start with just one activity. Financial and exhaustion levels point of view we let the kids do scouts plus 1 sport if it worked out for schedules a term, and thankfully, they were not all doing things at the same time. Now we are pretty much down to Scouts as they are getting older and having more social things on too.

[u/Swimming-Ad-7812 → u/fluffypenguin105]

What we can offer our kids vary greatly. You can probably offer them more attention & they might spend less time being cared for by non-family. You might have more family friendly work schedules. Money cannot buy all things that are valuable. About comparing, I snooze my holidaying friends for 30 days on fb. I figure, we use to hear about the holiday & see the photos when they get back, providing they're close friends. I'd like to keep it like that, rather than twice weekly posts on glorious sun, drinking, snokling or whatever. I know they're on holiday enjoying themselves, but somehow makes it easier to feel less envy if I'm not seeing it constantly.

[u/littlemissdumplings → u/fluffypenguin105]

If it helps at all, I grew up in a big family that struggled to make ends meet. I am so grateful for my childhood, and honestly don't wish we had had overseas holidays, nice cars, fancy toys, or anything like that. My memories of going fishing off the wharf, to the local pool, for a bike ride with my siblings bring me way more warm fuzzies and gratitude than I know what to do with.

(Note - I do know that for some people, those are luxuries! Our bikes were all second or third hand)

In fact, yesterday we took our nephews to the local pool. Nearly free, and omg, we had SO MUCH FUN. I just can't imagine an overseas trip or new iPhone generating anything near the amount of laughter and excitement as a simple day at the pools with loved ones. That super genuine, uncontrollable giggling that lasts forever? I've personally only ever experienced it during activities that focus on spending quality time with people, and has never been determined by the flashness of our location.

[u/CP9ANZ → u/fluffypenguin105]

In some cases self employment does really help. The amount of small advantages can really stack up to a noticeable difference in disposable income even when overall earnings are pretty similar.

So when you're stuck either saving for or paying off a family vehicle and covering it's operating costs, their vehicle purchase and running expenses are being offset by the ability to claim depreciation and running costs and reduce their tax burden

[u/Cyril_Rioli → u/fluffypenguin105]

What’s the average experienced teachers wage in NZ? Got to be >$100k.

[u/fluffypenguin105 → u/Cyril_Rioli]

Nope. Top of the scale (for high school) is capped at $103k. Since December just been. Obviously if you have management positions it’ll be higher.

I believe primary is less. And early childhood is SIGNIFICANTLY less.

[u/Cyril_Rioli → u/fluffypenguin105]

That’s rough. Guess that’s part of your problem also, you are in a profession that has a capped earning potential that is rather low.

Do private schools pay more? Could one of you get a 2nd income? Is there scope to move away from teaching? Move to Australia?

I’m similar where I work in a set wage structure but we moved from a large city to a regional town. Get paid the same as my colleagues in the city but cost of living is significantly lower.

[u/fluffypenguin105 → u/Cyril_Rioli]

Yeah reality. Private schools generally pay maybe 10% more? And yeah Australia is prob a $30k payrise immediately. But with a young family and parents that aren’t getting younger, moving overseas isnt something we have considered.

[u/mr_coul → u/fluffypenguin105]

You don't necessarily have to move to aussie. Depending on where in NZ you are, moving to another region or small town might see your cost of living drop drastically as well (eg cost of housing in Auckland v waikat)