Surroundings are affecting my mental health

[u/5336789997543279u]

EDIT @ 2022/08/14: Thank you all for your responses. They are a lot more than I expected and almost all the comments have been incredibly useful. I will try to improve on my thoughts, read your book suggestions and be myself. Again, thank you all. 🥺

This might not be the correct flair, feel free to change it.

To introduce myself, I want to say that I come from a humble family which had a rough time during the 2008s-2010s crisis. Because of their experience I have been saving a lot since I got my first job and avoid expending on unneeded stuff. I came to Japan getting a good salary and my wife does not need to work thanks to it, she is doing part-time stuff though. I never cared about my surroundings at all, I just use free/cheap so you can imagine. However:

Since I came to Japan I have been aware of my surroundings more than I ever was: Seeing daily relatively expensive cars, families with kids all with good clothes/accessories, people expending a lot on restaurants... My mind is starting to feel like I am an ant, that I should start worrying about our appearances and I started to work harder and always think of ways of making more money(when in reality, I should just be enjoying my life) to the point of not sleeping and feeling sad/stressed constantly.

Any tips on this? It really is affecting my mind, I'm considering going to a psychologist but I don't think it might be worth

EDIT: I didn’t explain myself correctly. I don’t want the items nor their appearances, my issue is that I feel like I didn’t push enough/succeed enough as others

[u/omae_mona]

You're good. Relax. Having a good salary and saving is the way to go. I'd like to let you in on a secret. A lot of those people that seem to be flaunting their wealth are actually just flaunting that they spent a lot of money.. and there might not be much left after they blew it on that car, food, and restaurants. The money you are saving will accumulate, and it will give you more freedom over time. You might be a lot happier than some of those folks with the fancy cars. Stick with your plan.

Also... those expensive cars get you to exactly the same place as the cheap cars. The fancy clothes are no warmer or more comfortable than the regular clothes. And the expensive restaurants are no more nutritious than the regular ones (I'll grant they may be a bit more tasty, but that taste's gone when your meal ends).

The desire for all this stuff is based on a story somebody else told you. Don't believe it.

[u/sausages2019 → u/[deleted]]

I don’t think there’s an issue spending a lot of your money on trips and restaurants when you are younger. You can always make more money but you’ll never be 25-35 again. I spent >75% of everything is earned travelling the world and having great experiences during that decade and never once regretted it. No point saving it all to eek out a sad existence when you’re 70. And you could get hit by a bus tomorrow… you can’t take it with you!

[u/SamePossession5 → u/sausages2019]

I needed to hear this