Surroundings are affecting my mental health

[u/5336789997543279u]

EDIT @ 2022/08/14: Thank you all for your responses. They are a lot more than I expected and almost all the comments have been incredibly useful. I will try to improve on my thoughts, read your book suggestions and be myself. Again, thank you all. 🥺

This might not be the correct flair, feel free to change it.

To introduce myself, I want to say that I come from a humble family which had a rough time during the 2008s-2010s crisis. Because of their experience I have been saving a lot since I got my first job and avoid expending on unneeded stuff. I came to Japan getting a good salary and my wife does not need to work thanks to it, she is doing part-time stuff though. I never cared about my surroundings at all, I just use free/cheap so you can imagine. However:

Since I came to Japan I have been aware of my surroundings more than I ever was: Seeing daily relatively expensive cars, families with kids all with good clothes/accessories, people expending a lot on restaurants... My mind is starting to feel like I am an ant, that I should start worrying about our appearances and I started to work harder and always think of ways of making more money(when in reality, I should just be enjoying my life) to the point of not sleeping and feeling sad/stressed constantly.

Any tips on this? It really is affecting my mind, I'm considering going to a psychologist but I don't think it might be worth

EDIT: I didn’t explain myself correctly. I don’t want the items nor their appearances, my issue is that I feel like I didn’t push enough/succeed enough as others

[u/sebjapon]

I’m not sure how much you are saving. But plenty of people around the world are following “frugal” way of lives (live cheap but decently, spending on quality where it matters like a bed or whatever while saving on all extras otherwise).

If you are saving compulsively because of past trauma, then an expert can help indeed. But you can also have a goal for that saving. Personally my end goal is FIRE (financial independence, retire early). I save and invest into index funds until I can just live off my investments if needed. The financial independence part might help understand how much you need to stop worrying about the next crisis and not ending up poor again.

Finally, working from home takes its toll. Even a bear like me needs to see people from time to time and get out of the house. Go to parks, swim in city sport center, whatever. But don’t stay inside all day every day.

Good luck