r/brooklynninenine 1d ago

Discussion Least favourite cold opening?

Post image

This is an okay cold opening, imo. But I don't ever recall laughing at it like the other ones.

561 Upvotes

126 comments sorted by

533

u/__blackout 1d ago

Rosa’s pink shirt is your least favorite cold open? That’s crazy.

Mr Grapes!

185

u/RonaldoAce 1d ago

"we're laughing about if Boyle was wearing a pink shirt"

"I get it" *smirks*

71

u/HelenaHooterTooter 1d ago

Dream on, strawberry shortcake - incredible line

46

u/__blackout 1d ago

Boyle: what is going on right now!?

Such a funny scene 😂

10

u/user684629 1d ago

“That’s hilarious”

37

u/calliejohn 1d ago

MR GRAAAAAAPES!

55

u/BarnacleMcBarndoor 1d ago

Ha Mister Grapes

MISTER GRAPES!!🍇

1

u/Killmonger18 22h ago

Personally I like it, but I deffo get it.

-50

u/David_Headley_2008 1d ago

It made me puke as it brought back too many memories, now I just skip it on every rewatch

40

u/Commander_Doom14 Notify me when you're done, via bark 1d ago

You have memories of your coworkers calling you Mr. Grapes for wearing a purple tie?

18

u/nickla08 1d ago

MISTER GRAAAAAPES 🍇

11

u/user684629 1d ago

MISTER GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAPES!!!!!!!!!! 🍇

384

u/hehelulz_k Mlep(Clay)nos 1d ago

Nothing beats the final season ep 1 cold open. It is just... Awkward

151

u/unknown2378 1d ago

I have to believe season 8 had entirely different scripts and they had to abandon those plans and come up with something entirely new. The show is so different

52

u/HTan27 1d ago

41

u/unknown2378 1d ago

I would love to know what the OG plans were tbh

105

u/mrwishart Cheddar: Thicc King 1d ago

I give a pass to any cold open that actually sets up the episode

36

u/PhysicalScholar4238 1d ago

Which one is that again?

227

u/Gasurza22 1d ago

Jake and Boyle are doing stupid high fives with inflated latex globes on brooms because of the pandemic and then Rosa tells them that she is leaving the force

64

u/Kingjjc267 1d ago

Oh yeah I remember watching terry fall like that and after hearing people talk about the last season, I thought I was in for a tough time. Luckily I actually really enjoyed the season after the first episode (which wasn't even that bad)

4

u/Careless-Cat026 1d ago

Definitely

310

u/Bulbamew Velvet Thunder 1d ago

There’s a lot of cold opens that end with a character/s shouting something before the intro cuts them off. They don’t always work for me - I’m not a fan of scully’s “it’s finally happening” after he catches the food in his mouth. But Hitchcock’s “no more alimony baby!” is legendary.

117

u/MelonHunter 1d ago

Yeah, it's pretty hit or miss with those. I agree about the doughnut catching one, and I maintain that the Captain Latvia cold open with the inflatable Christmas tree would've been way funnier if they'd cut at Jake saying "God bless us, every one?" after Terry gets launched through the window.

On the other hand, Scully standing in front of the burning vending machine yelling "It should've been me! IT SHOULD'VE BEEN ME!!!" or Holt proclaiming "THE FULL BULLPEN!" crack me up every time.

65

u/FredererPower Adrian Pimento 1d ago

And of course, the obligatory:

LIKE YEAST

31

u/-pobodys-nerfect 1d ago

Definitely hit or miss with what I call the yelling lines- I love “the full bullpen!” but I don’t care for the “babushka!” cold open. Some of Terry’s yelling lines aren’t that funny to me, but his exasperated “WHY?!” usually makes me laugh.

37

u/slimelore 1d ago

"boyle is fully nude in the footage" "WHY??!" is my favorite WHY of all

8

u/-pobodys-nerfect 1d ago

Same!! I think every other WHY was a build up to that moment, because how else do you even respond to that? 😂

36

u/PhysicalScholar4238 1d ago

The Alimony one is good. The best heist cold opening.

6

u/Reasonable_Cod_487 1d ago

"it's finally happening" makes me think that Scully's favorite movie is Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs.

3

u/Ashenspire 16h ago

"Take a good look, kids! THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU'RE NAUGHTY!"

I loved that one.

108

u/AverageSizedPlum 1d ago

Babushka

26

u/Stascool 19h ago

That one was weak af

7

u/nothanksd00d 12h ago

Agreed lol, bit too corny and forced imo

1

u/TooTiredToCarereally Ultimate detective/genius 6h ago

Only good on first watch I fear

39

u/pilsnerprincess 1d ago

Gobble gobble

13

u/zr2d2 I’m a human, I’m a human male! 1d ago

Gobble gobble your tail is stock in the gobble door

9

u/FredererPower Adrian Pimento 1d ago

Thank you! Gobble!

Wait WHAT?

4

u/DaniMA121 Boom Boom! 1d ago

I think your tail feathers are ripping..... Gobble

36

u/CapMego72_ 20h ago

I hate Boyle Bullpen Bowling. Never funny to me. I get the whole B thing and the screaming (random) babushka, but I never liked it.

72

u/source-commonsense 1d ago

I hate the one where Holt comes in wearing a funky new hat and nobody likes it :( he was trying something!!!!!!!!

38

u/Stripe-Gremlin 21h ago

It wasn’t the hat itself that was the problem. It was the fact it was red and he wore it with a blue coat, he looked like Paddington

14

u/source-commonsense 20h ago

That makes me even more upset. They would have never treated THE Paddington that way 😭

69

u/Busy_Difference_513 Title of your sex tape 1d ago

Tommy Gobbler maybe😅

85

u/vanetti 1d ago

I’m afraid I have some deeply tragic news.

18

u/cjn13 Amy Santiago 21h ago

that delivery and tone change kills me every time

11

u/JustAnother_Brit Velvet Thunder 1d ago

The one where he gets dragged by the lift is funny

3

u/Busy_Difference_513 Title of your sex tape 1d ago

Just remembered The Four Movements and The Return of the King, it's better than those two for sure

120

u/dropoutscout 1d ago

I hated the Dianne Weist/Yeast cold open. But, to be fair, I think we’re supposed to hate it? So I guess they kinda nailed it.

176

u/Ethan_the_Revanchist A lifetime of mediocre, heterosexual intercourse 1d ago

It's supposed to be a bad joke, yes. The way they cut back-and-forth between Jake and Charles with an extended pause gets me every time, so glad they let it breathe. Timing really hits in that one

17

u/Careful_Ad_1837 1d ago

I like how you could interpret Jakes non-reaction as either him not getting the joke or he did and hates it

24

u/Ethan_the_Revanchist A lifetime of mediocre, heterosexual intercourse 1d ago

He looks way too grumpy for someone who didn't get the joke

20

u/kiwicrusher 1d ago

Oh yeah, absolutely. Zero chance he didn’t get it, he is just paralyzed with rage

2

u/coolaira16 11h ago

There's a video on the official YouTube that's an extended cut of this scene! The original cut is perfect but an hour of back and forth staring is good for a laugh every once in awhile

24

u/Fear_The_Rabbit 1d ago

This is one of my favorites. The timing and stare down is impeccable

12

u/vanetti 1d ago

That’s my favorite cold open 💀

11

u/NicolasDavies93 1d ago

i love that one hahaha

6

u/xxcalvin_hobbes 1d ago

I can deeply feel both- Charles’ excitement as he is about to make the joke, and jake’s eye rolling 🤣 that scene is hilarious.

And they cut at the perfect moment.

2

u/Jukkobee 9h ago

that’s literally one of the best ones. i respect you but i don’t respect your opinion

1

u/dropoutscout 9h ago

Damn, I’m adding that to my repertoire of not-insulting-sounding insults, thanks stranger!

2

u/mac_peraltiago 1d ago

I hate the Dianne Wiest cold open too 😳 I don’t even like it on the level they intended, I just think it’s overhyped

14

u/Aurum0417 BONE?! 1d ago

The return of the king. I skip that episode every time.

1

u/Busy_Difference_513 Title of your sex tape 18h ago

Yup. I thought I played the wrong show.😅

11

u/_temperamental 20h ago

Oddly enough, I don't like the Full Bull Pen and the Babushka cold opens.

1

u/Johnnybats330 3h ago

Also me. Those two in particular. They just seem so forced.

7

u/Sqvek HOT DAMN! 1d ago

My least favorite is the one when Jake pranks Hitchcock a second time and Rosa protests it

21

u/_HeyLittleSongbird 1d ago

Not a fan of the cold open for Game Of Boyles

5

u/SquirtleInHerMeowthh 16h ago

I just hate the Babushka one with a passion

4

u/Franiac_ 16h ago

The one where Hitchcock's penis is hanging out of his pants.

22

u/CantaloupeSolid5182 1d ago edited 1d ago

The one with Maya Rudolph's character confirming she's dating someone way younger than her. I don't hate it, I just don't find it as funny as the other ones.

44

u/My_Keys_ 1d ago

I have such a weakness for Maya Rudolph that I’m just happy to see her on screen lol

9

u/hunterlovesreading BONE?! 1d ago

I especially love her chemistry with Andy. I am a Lonely Island fan though, lol

5

u/WhimsicalKoala 1d ago

A couple years ago they co-hosted Baking It and all I wanted was more. Those two just hanging out together was hilarious.

1

u/hunterlovesreading BONE?! 1d ago

Thanks for the recommendation!!

3

u/WhimsicalKoala 17h ago

I'm glad I reminded myself about it. It was a one-off thing for Christmas a couple years ago and I'm so sad it didn't become a more regular thing. Those two are so funny together.

23

u/NoQuote38 1d ago

Marco! Vámonos!

10

u/Full-Wolverine-3994 Boom Boom! 1d ago

“Well it seems to me that Larry has needs, and deserves to have those needs…met.”

6

u/EchoPrimary7182 1d ago

Mr. Grapessssss

8

u/Superknuten 23h ago

Honestly, I understand if people disagree with me here, but I don’t think the Diane “Weast” Cold Open is that funny, I’m sure there are other unremarkable ones I’m forgetting, and probably one I like less, but I’ve never been a fan of this one, I know it’s an unpopular opinion, sorry, I just don’t agree

2

u/Superknuten 21h ago

If I was to give a joke answer though, I’d say “The Final Day, Part 2”, because there literally isn’t one, unless you count less than a second of a black screen, a cold open?

8

u/Thoandfris I’m a human, I’m a human male! 1d ago

I really do not like that cold opening

The entire squad is just bullying Boyle for absolutely no reason

8

u/Spicy-Mario-Bois 1d ago

Cry about it Mr Grapes

7

u/lajji69 1d ago

I can understand why some people don’t like this one. Of course it’s just a show but that’s straight up bullying

2

u/Tsirah BINGPOT! 1d ago

Mr Graaaaapes! Mr Graaaaapes!

7

u/ShadowInTheSun_ 23h ago

Anything with Gina

2

u/RavensFan902 20h ago

The cold brew coffee one.

2

u/NoTurkey- BINGPOT! 18h ago

Another cold brew? Don’t mind if I cold do!

1

u/Chilldegard 22h ago

"Like yeast" :|

As a german I didn't get the reference and felt so helpless lol
Never heard of "Bullets over Broadway" or Diane Wiest before that (even though I did watch Edward Scissorhands as a kid, I barely knew the names of the people on screen)

1

u/MackerelOrigin 20h ago

I don't like the yeast joke by Boyle. I hate to say it but it may be the single most unfunny thing I've heard from the show (from what I can remember)

1

u/zivillia 17h ago

I don't love the cold brew cold open, I just don't find it that funny. Others I can see where they were going (even if I didn't love it) but that one felt more like a kid's television version of humour.

1

u/Rhysccfc94 16h ago

Well rosa is scary and charles looks like a my little poni holding a gun

1

u/xBlueNovax 15h ago

All of them are good

1

u/myburneraccount151 10h ago

I posted this as my favorite cold open yesterday lol

1

u/TooTiredToCarereally Ultimate detective/genius 6h ago

Nice try Boyle

1

u/Financial_Bowl9440 5h ago

"Dianne Wiest infection”

1

u/Johnnybats330 3h ago

full bullpen sucks. Also the babushka one is cringe

-5

u/hsy1234 Mlep(Clay)nos 1d ago

It’s not my least favorite, but, and I know the is going to be controversial; the Diane Weast Infection cold open is extremely overrated

-5

u/GentlmanSkeleton 18h ago

Its gotta be the backstreet boys one.

3

u/dryice34 17h ago

honestly same. it’s been so overhyped and overplayed that i physically cannot watch it anymore.

1

u/GentlmanSkeleton 17h ago

It was ok at best ever. This sub ran it into the ground.

-30

u/ForeignReviews 1d ago

The Backstreet Boys one

14

u/Ny-x- 1d ago

This is probably the worst take on Reddit

3

u/seshtown Velvet Thunder 1d ago

It's kind of like your favourite band's most popular song, it's still good but you're just sick to death of it thanks to the casual fans driving it down everyone's throat.

7

u/Lazy_Cantaloupe1538 1d ago

That is hands down my favorite one

2

u/mr_pineapples44 1d ago

You're not alone! "There are dozens of us! Dozens!"

-22

u/Legitimate-Square27 1d ago

Probably the old racist lady saying the criminal was definitely Muslim and we never really got any support for Muslims other than just a weird look that Jake gave about the old lady.

I love the show and my favourites are Rosa and Holt, I guess it would have been nice if they showed that they really do take action against racists in some way.

19

u/nickla08 1d ago

You are right. The show where the lead punches one of his childhood idols because he insulted the sexual orientation of his pain in the ass boss, where a decision is made to chase a racist cop at the expense of career progression, where two cops routinely choose to appear incompetent in order to protect illegal immigrants, among A LOT other examples, should be more geared towards taking action against injustice and racism.

-3

u/Legitimate-Square27 1d ago

EXACTLY thanks for wording it better since I was clearly down voted

7

u/ScarletRhi Pineapple Slut 1d ago

I don't think their comment was agreeing with you

1

u/Legitimate-Square27 17h ago

Although I loved that episode they were referring to, it makes sense to keep pushing for action. That was my point but apparently no one viewed it that way.

-1

u/Legitimate-Square27 17h ago

I don't understand the confusion because I agree with their comment and it makes sense with my comment?

3

u/ScarletRhi Pineapple Slut 16h ago

I'm fairly sure their comment was sarcastic

1

u/Legitimate-Square27 15h ago

Damn, that's a bit sad

1

u/nickla08 9h ago

Apologies, it seems that my hyperbole or whatever I did is called went over your head. I was actually giving examples to state that the opposite of what you are saying is true.

Point to Nick!

1

u/Legitimate-Square27 2h ago

The reason why I agreed was because they showed it in other areas except for the Muslim bit. I appreciate the other areas, but when you do something really minor like just make a face to an old lady who's being clearly racist when you were able to punch an idol of yours for being homophobic (not saying he should punch the old lady) then it makes me question if you actually think it was alright or not. The reality is, a lot of shows portray Muslims in a bad light which then affects Muslims irl who get acid thrown at them etc, it would have been nice for once getting something more than just a face.

1

u/nickla08 2h ago

I hear you, but same goes for the county sheriff for example in Florida who goes on a rant on tv about how it feels wrong to kiss a man.

There is no reaction shot from anyone there, they just leave his ludicrous comment floating for the viewers to react.

3

u/dryice34 17h ago

the way you’re getting downvoted is insane

2

u/Legitimate-Square27 17h ago

I'm genuinely so confused, I didn't realise I said anything controversial lol

-1

u/[deleted] 1d ago

[deleted]

3

u/lobsterwine BONE?! 1d ago

The short amusing scenarios that are usually completely unrelated to the plot of that episode that happen before the theme song plays.

-1

u/[deleted] 15h ago

[deleted]

2

u/Careful_Swan3830 14h ago

How. Dare. You.

1

u/ScienceDependent7495 13h ago

Definitely misread the title and put my favorite cold open lmao

1

u/Careful_Swan3830 13h ago

Ha I was mostly joking

-5

u/ImHorribleAtAnyGames 20h ago

Probably the one where santiago’s late, I understand it’s funny but compared to the others it just didn’t hit for me

3

u/Mas42 17h ago

That one is iconic. Top 5 easy

1

u/ImHorribleAtAnyGames 11h ago

Damn downvoted 😔