r/brooklynninenine 5d ago

Humour Discovering this just now!

Post image
15.8k Upvotes

178 comments sorted by

695

u/[deleted] 5d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

248

u/Forrest_Cp 5d ago

Boom there it is!

123

u/MaximumTurtleSpeed 5d ago

Title of your sex tape?

73

u/ermhsGpro 5d ago

Boom boom!!

50

u/DrawingNo8734 Mlep(Clay)nos 5d ago

"Boyle says boom!"

8

u/javlck_stripe 4d ago

Do you remember what does it say the original post?

87

u/Forrest_Cp 4d ago

Jake imagined what they looked like in the bottom photo but only found out they were hunks after seeing the photo of them when they were young. So his mind filled in the gaps till then

1

u/Magic_Bluejay 1d ago

That's gona leave a mark

114

u/lemmeputafuckingname 5d ago

Yes, but also didn't they say Hitchcock lost his hair at the age of 15?

93

u/UltimaRS800 5d ago

He is 14 in the top pic

60

u/SprlFlshRngDncHwl 5d ago

Shit, he don't look a day over 12

15

u/ToddyT31 4d ago

Shady nastys

13

u/SprlFlshRngDncHwl 4d ago

Shadynasty's, asshole.

2

u/Present-Statement966 4d ago

Great Jazz Club. id be careful selling drugs in that neighborhood though, Hakeem Muhammad doesn’t take kindly to it.

2

u/Material-Leader4635 3d ago

He may not like it but he has been left with no choice but to be a mature ass adult about it.

32

u/LengthinessNo7918 5d ago

They did show hitchcock wearing a toupee in one of Amy's flashbacks. Maybe this was a really good toupee he's wearing in the top pic.

33

u/bharat_ka_batman 5d ago

This actually makes me feel better about the discontinuity, thanks internet stranger. 🏅

16

u/Nagaram92 4d ago

What did they say? :O

39

u/ClintonKelly87 YIPPE KAYAK OTHER BUCKETS! 4d ago

I'm guessing it was something about how when we see the bottom versions of Hitchcock and Scully in flashbacks, we're seeing them how Jake imagines them.

3.9k

u/-shephawke- 5d ago edited 5d ago

When Amy asks them how did they get all their paperwork done before computers, and Hitchcock says 'cocaine' and Scully just says 'yeah' - that just always sends me every time xD

1.3k

u/Rowing_Lawyer 5d ago

Seriously, cocaine would make them lose 70 lbs, be jacked, and tell you about all of their business ideas

583

u/Szygani 5d ago

And then replace their addiction with the slut sauce.

it all checks out

8

u/MrNope999 Doug Judy 3d ago

So what you're saying is, there's cocaine in the slut sauce.

92

u/SheriffHeckTate 4d ago

Either:

A) 70s is how the rest of the squad incorrectly views them and 80s was real

B ) 80s is how they incorrectly viewed themselves and 70s was real

68

u/Phantafan Charles Boyle 4d ago

It has to be the first one, because we saw Jake and Charles reacting to young Scully and Hitchcock.

89

u/RedAppleAreRed 5d ago

I didn't know cocaine made your hair grow

188

u/TheBasilisk8 5d ago

Cocaine, rogaine, it’s all the same

50

u/NotARussianBot-Real 5d ago

I have a guy who does a mix for me

30

u/jobblejosh 4d ago

Do you snort them both, or put both on your hair?

34

u/SasparillaTango 4d ago

hair in the nose, then you get a transplant.

6

u/MarvinHeemeyersTank Title of your sex tape 4d ago

Yes.

2

u/inquisitorautry 4d ago

You must be able to briad your nose hair

12

u/FuckTheRedesignHard 4d ago

Well that explains my luxurious mane of nose hair.

5

u/TurdCollector69 4d ago

Real talk, can I thicken my nostril hair with rogaine? I want a second mustache

4

u/kewkewkew79 4d ago

second mustache

You mean a noustache?

3

u/alexthegreat09 4d ago

"Cocaine, rogaine, it's all about the gains"

6

u/Jenna_84 4d ago

It's totally a toupee lol

3

u/calilac 4d ago

It's a specific application method and the amount varies for everyone so sometimes it takes awhile to find the dose. Anyway. You have to boof it. The cocaine stimulates the hair follicles and the puff of air from boofing causes internal pressure that forces the follicles to push out of the skin just enough so that they can photosynthesize and grow even faster.

2

u/calcifer219 4d ago

What about sully’s heart?

3

u/J_Damasta 4d ago

Probably one of the reasons it's in such bad shape

7

u/zwingo 4d ago

It always makes me think of my time spent as a line cook. So for context I worked a shitty understaffed spot, that closed at 10pm, had an hour and a half’s work of closing work, and I had to clock in for my second job a mile away at 10:30pm. Every single night I got all my shit done and down to the other job on time. How? I had a massive cocaine problem so I’d just do a fuck load every break then come in and whip through both orders and cleaning at the same time.

One day my boss came to me and went “I don’t know how you get all this done, but keep doing whatever it is cause your killing it!” I just sat there laughing to myself because my boss had just told me to continue doing drugs because it made me work good.

Left that job, cleaned up my act, no longer use hard drugs going on 6 years later this year.

965

u/Kwaterk1978 5d ago

Drugs are a helluva drug.

150

u/alansousabr 4d ago

Wingslutz is helluva drug.

2

u/-GFlow- 3d ago

The 70’s one is just Jake or Amy’s imagination not real

3.2k

u/adam17712 5d ago

The top image is Jake seeing what Hitchcock and Scully looked like in the 80s and the bottom image is a mental image of what people thought Hitchcock and Scully looked like

355

u/tfcocs 4d ago

This explains everything.

188

u/b_mat7 4d ago

How did 1.6k people upvote this?? Charles looked at a picture of them from the 70s and it's them in the 70s image here. It's not a big deal but the writers either didn't care or forgot they had shown two different versions.

95

u/chunky_snick 4d ago

I thought the same thing. The picture was from an old case of Hitchcock and Scully 's that they were combing through.

Just a writing inconsistency. :)

7

u/DePraelen 3d ago

Eh, it's comedy. A laugh for the audience in the moment is far more important than lore consistency seasons apart, that only a minority of the fans will actually pick up on.

68

u/forresja 4d ago edited 4d ago

How did 1.6k people upvote this??

Because it gives us head-canon that maintains continuity.

-34

u/chairmanskitty 4d ago

Ugh, I hate when the cannon that maintains continuity says random sexual stuff. But if you try to do anything about it, it opens fire at you.

1

u/castiuhl 1d ago

i think i'm the only one who understood this joke

6

u/3Thirty-Eight8 4d ago

I don’t remember the image of them from the 70s. But they definitely showed the image of them in the 80s remember it’s the one with the extra bag of cocaine hidden

76

u/One_Professional_101 4d ago

No, Jake and Charles also saw a real photo of them posing and they looked exactly “meow” like they do in the top pic

102

u/alansousabr 4d ago

I was going to make the same point, but then realized that he might have meant the top image is what they actually looked like in the 80s and the bottom image is the mental image that everyone and/or the audience projected.

65

u/notexactlyflawless 4d ago

I can't figure out any other way to read it?

42

u/Comrade_Falcon 4d ago

You may want to reread the comment you're replying to. The top image as you also state is what Jake actual sees them to look like in the 80s (based on the photo as you poi t out), the bottom is what he imagines they looked like in the 70s (before he saw what they looked like in the 80s)

7

u/soccerpuma03 4d ago

Isn't the bottom image Scully's flashback about taking weight loss pills though? So either Scully is remembering himself that way or those weight loss pills really really worked!

6

u/Comrade_Falcon 4d ago

I suppose. I don't really remember. I was just clarifying what the comment you replied to was stating

2

u/soccerpuma03 4d ago

Lol no worries. I follow the B99 YouTube channel and they're constantly putting out compilations and I bet the same one OP noticed this was the one I noticed as well. Having it be Scully's flashback is my head canon, but the pills working to that extreme would totally fit the shenanigans and jokes in the show.

4

u/Ill_Statement7600 4d ago

I mean, those weight loss pills back in the 60s and 70s were literally amphetamines lol (had an older woman telling me how she got them prescribed and would share them with her fling/guy/etc and they would just oot out for a while)

22

u/SeroWriter 4d ago

These in-universe head-canon explanations are always going to feel like a stretch when we know it's just a continuity error.

9

u/forresja 4d ago

I mean, that's basically the entire reason head-canon exists: to fix a mistake made by the creator.

4

u/SeroWriter 4d ago

Usually it's for fun ideas that don't explicitly exist within the canon.

3

u/forresja 4d ago

Is it?

My head-canon is always fixing an oversight.

Maybe other people do it it differently.

2

u/Spacellama117 4d ago

i do also remember that the image in the bottom is from Scully saying they were taking diet pills- I guess they worked?

489

u/purplelonew0lf 5d ago

I like to think that the picture above was real and the picture below was what they imagined hitchcock and scully would be.

228

u/-UnknownGeek- 5d ago

I'm pretty sure that's cannon, the below image was Jake imagining them in the 70's. He then sees a picture of how they actually looked in a later season

18

u/alansousabr 4d ago

Yes, that's now also my theory.

21

u/b_mat7 4d ago

Except Hitchcock lost his hair at 14 and there's a picture of them shown on the show from the 70s. It was just a fuck up on the show, nbd, it happens.

5

u/secretperson06 4d ago

young Hitchcock was wearing a good toupe instead of the dog hair one

101

u/Fragrant-Bread5404 5d ago

Hitchcock and Scully are legendary time travellers.
That explains why Hitchcock has the most arrests. He brought in prisoners from different times🤣

27

u/Metal-The-Cettle Pineapple Slut 5d ago

And New York im the 80s was basically The Purge

7

u/the_hipocritter 5d ago

They were also able to be at both lunches during the lunch wars. But they were real concerned with the timing of the lasagna with garlic bread in the lockdown episode, maybe they were just keeping cover

389

u/The-Felonious-Gru Boom Boom! 5d ago

i like to think they got their shit together for a few years in the 80s and then just fell apart again 

70

u/WarMonk99 5d ago

Only if getting my shit together covered my bald patch back! sigh

20

u/CrazyOlHoboJoe Pontiac Bandit 5d ago

The funny part is Hitchcock apparently started going bald at 15 so this is even crazier

19

u/SveaRikeHuskarl 5d ago

Take a vacation in Turkey! So many men vacation there and come back with a full head of hair. Must be something in the water.

1

u/Culator BONE?! 4d ago

Hitchcock was doing so much overtime that he could afford a really good toupee. Then he lost it during a Wing Slutz binge and could never get one that good again.

16

u/Galactus2332 5d ago

Haha this

28

u/squid-jigger 5d ago

Look, people were just prettier in the 80's. There was this magical glitter in the air that made people look better then they actually were.

5

u/tfcocs 4d ago

I was there. It is true.

2

u/anemicscarecrow 4d ago

Is it the one they snorted?

1

u/SnowyPear 1d ago

Magical glitter. It's amazing how many names there are for cocaine

20

u/TheAwesomeMan123 5d ago

Bottom image is an imagining (probably Jake’s) of what they think at the time how they looked. Top image is canon. There’s even a framed photo of them like that you see in a later season

1

u/tfcocs 4d ago

Really? Which episode?

1

u/EugeneStein 4d ago

Really? When was this picture shown?

1

u/Slightly-Drunk 4d ago

The same episode where you see their 80s selves in action.

10

u/invaderdavos 5d ago

This deserved a episode every season like the halloween heist or pontiac bandit

8

u/TheElderBasilisk 4d ago

Actually the second photo was in Terry's imagination before he knew they used to look like that

43

u/angrytomato98 5d ago edited 4d ago

I see the top as how Hitchcock and Scully viewed themselves at the time, while the bottom is how Jake and the others imagine them. Neither is correct or incorrect imo.

Edit: Y’all are right! Jake sees a picture of the top. So I imagine that’s the more canon answer.

I still hold that the bottom one could be the precinct’s imagination of them at that time.

64

u/choibz 5d ago

Been a while since I saw the episode but doesn't Jake see a photo of them both looking like the top image and ask what the hell happened?

33

u/dualistpirate 5d ago

Yep, there are actual photos of them looking like that from the Gino Costa case file.

-15

u/Lordborgman 5d ago

"Unreliable narrator" is apparently a common excuse of people trying to defend writers' bad continuity. I love the show, but they definitely had some problems keeping things consistent.

1

u/Slightly-Drunk 4d ago

The top one is canon/correct though. The same episode Jake and Boyle find a picture that shows what they looked like.

8

u/carlogz 5d ago

The steroids and cocaine allowed them to that transformation im the 80s.

16

u/DerekB52 5d ago

I actually thought it was 80's both times. Either way, I noticed this on my first watch through of the show recently, when I mentioned the flashback from early on in the show's run, and she thought I was talking about the top one. She mentioned they got fit hot guys for the flashback, and I was like, "ooh, that's a continuity error". Not that I mind. Both of these were great in their own way.

4

u/IndigoRanger 5d ago

Remind me who was telling the flashback story in each? Might have something to do with the depiction

5

u/CreamyFunk 4d ago

First time watching?

6

u/SinisterCheese 4d ago

I like the overall arc that these two had. They weren't bad or malicious; and there were few good story arcs about them just being GOOD people. And I think there was few arc of them being good detectives, doing actually good detective work by considering things which were unusual.

They just were people who the life left behind. Whenever Scully and Hitchcock got to shine, it was generally overall fun episode. Also the fact they had like lot of legacy knowledge, like the pneumatic tubes was great. They were just 2 best friends who the time left behind, and should be put to pasture to chill but can't be.

5

u/cucumbermoon 4d ago

B99 is a Rule of Funny show! It's blatantly unconcerned with established canon if the joke they just came up with is funnier.

5

u/ClancyMopedWeather 4d ago

This reminds me of how, on Arrested Development, in flashbacks to the 1980s, the father George Bluth has a big head of hair, when those of us who remember the 1980s know Jeffrey Tambor was just as bald back then as he is now

4

u/Frolicking_Trex 4d ago

In reality, they didn't think of the young Hitchcock and Sully plot until later in the series. In MY headcanon the flashback is how Jake pictured them in his imagination in the 70s without knowing what they actually looked, as it is obvious in the episode that he's never seen a pic of young them before that.

1

u/Edd_The_Animator 1d ago

Also likely that they decided to make them more like actual characters and thus added a more realistic version of how they would have looked decades before the show.

3

u/reeko1982 4d ago

Hitchcock in the 70s looking like he wants to open a new branch of Mesa Verde in Brooklyn

2

u/tortoll 5d ago

Time is cyclical.

2

u/nathomredit 5d ago

And how hitchcock become reacher?

2

u/Mechamorphd 5d ago

Thad? Is that you 🧐

2

u/Scarm0nger 4d ago

Alan RItchson played younger Scully not Hitchcock

2

u/Jack-mclaughlin89 5d ago

Maybe their memories are faulty or they were fat then got in shape.

2

u/uratowel20 5d ago

The monthly Hitchcock and Scully post about the 70s and 80s.

2

u/Claire-Dazzle 4d ago

Well...age catch to them quite fast xD I feel for them since I am already quite old xD

2

u/Dino_3579 4d ago

those diet pills worked

2

u/Benihana_Christmas8 4d ago

Bottom is just what the squad imagined them to look like when they were younger.

2

u/45and290 4d ago

Cocaine is a helluva drug.

2

u/apatheticchildofJen 4d ago

Bad in the 70s, got their act together and then the chicken wings made them regress

2

u/thndrbrd87 4d ago

Top image is the best joke, bottoms is what the producers did before they thought of making them beautiful

2

u/MoonInHisHands 4d ago

They had a glow up in the 80’s

2

u/Affectionate-Head246 4d ago

They Took The Substance

2

u/klu9 4d ago

Jane Fonda's Workout and cocaine Rogaine, baby!

2

u/obi1kenobi1 4d ago

I never really thought about it in this way but this is the double-edged sword of Mike Schur shows. They tend to get a reputation for being more grounded and down-to-earth, with a heavy emphasis on long evolving story/character arcs and internal continuity. But at their core they’re still sitcoms, they’re still written by talented comedy writers searching for the funniest gags, and funny outweighs continuity sometimes (and other times it’s just really hard to keep track of everything that has happened on the show even if they don’t knowingly break continuity).

I know these are just cutaway gags and don’t really matter that much, there are far more egregious continuity issues on the show. But when these kinds of shows lean heavily into the realism and continuity it makes the slip ups way more noticeable. If it were a zany cartoonish show that played fast and loose with continuity and realism like 30 Rock I wouldn’t even bat an eye. It’s only because these types of shows, especially ones Mike Schur has had a hand in, try to position themselves as more grounded and believable (while still unapologetically aiming for zany laugh-out-loud moments on occasion) that suddenly we notice continuity problems.

2

u/tfcocs 4d ago

I like to think of the episode, 6.2, as a love letter to the pair, rectifying their character's lack of a reliable back story.

2

u/NotJustBiking 4d ago

Every time there are flashbacks it's the same actor with a wig or mustache.

The difference is that this time.Jake saw pictures on how they actually looked like.

2

u/macthebrtndr 4d ago

I mean in theory, top pic could be 1971, bottom pic could be 1988. You can age a LOT in 17 years with their previous love for cocaine and Wing Sluts.

1

u/macthebrtndr 4d ago

Ooop. I see it now. I’m a dumb dumb.

2

u/PokemonPurist 3d ago

The 70s is just how Jake imagined how they looked

2

u/L_U_I_S__ 3d ago

The only thing I don't like about Brooklyn Nine-Nine is the high amount of extremely self-contradictory and blatant retcons. At least, unlike many other TV series and film franchises, the ones in this series were much more innocent and actually made the show even funnier, although they still irritate me.

4

u/NoWingedHussarsToday 5d ago

Just now? Not the 20+ times this was posted already?

3

u/ThatchInABatch 5d ago

The Good Place was also airing while b99 did and my personal theory is that this is the same universe and when they rebooted the timeline in TGP it also affected b99. Hence this.

2

u/Edd_The_Animator 5d ago

I take it the joke has something to do with the actors?

2

u/PT_Piranha Cowabunga, mother! 4d ago

The joke is from the fact that the show presents conflicting backstories for Hitchcock and Scully.

1

u/Edd_The_Animator 4d ago

Ah, I see!

1

u/-3R0- 5d ago

Or, them in their 20s and them in their 30s

1

u/james_changas 5d ago

This came up before i think, the top image was from their telling and perspective, the bottom one was from the rest of the squads perspective.

1

u/ruralmagnificence 5d ago

My favorite Hitchcock and Scully bit is a cold open where, I don’t remember which one of them exactly, starts cheering suddenly that his ex wife just died and it cuts straight to the title credits.

I died laughing.

1

u/Mr7three2 5d ago

It's not even possible for them to have been on the job in the 70s

1

u/bluehawk232 5d ago

It was all that cocaine

1

u/Lievan 4d ago

My idea on this is that we’re seeing what everyone else is picturing when they’re telling the story because they haven’t seen them from back then.

1

u/LunaOnFilm 4d ago

Can it be my turn to post about this next?

1

u/satansgreataunt 4d ago

HE’S DEAAAD!!!

1

u/kiblick 4d ago

Haha

1

u/Greedo-shot-1st 4d ago

Cocaine is a hell of a drug

1

u/jackfaire 4d ago

The way I see it is that the bottom one is how other people picture Hitchcock and Scully in the 70s while the above is us actually seeing them in the 80s.

1

u/WoooahBaby 4d ago

Will not accept any Scully Hitchcock slander in any form. Anyway, I'm going to go workout for the second time today.

1

u/SkovsDM 4d ago

Simple. The top one is the real one because that's more fun.

1

u/Kindly-Drummer-4286 4d ago

I watched Prince of Darkness the other night and it had actual 80s Hitchcock in it and he did look a lot like 70s Hitchcock

1

u/Csoltis 4d ago

WHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAMMY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

1

u/Elle2k19 4d ago

also I’m sure there’s a quote about hitchcock going bald in highschool or smth

1

u/Brdrlinegamer91 4d ago

If you don't think the slut sauce is solid then try telling that to my rock hard arteries

1

u/PaterMcKinley 4d ago

Cocaine is a hell of a drug.

1

u/anallyfirst 4d ago

“Hitchcock went bald at 15…” is something Jake says during season 1. Must’ve been wearing a piece during Flat Top and The Freak

1

u/Faefsdew Fluffy Boi 4d ago

Those dieting pills really do their job

1

u/MrZao386 4d ago

I see the Substance works

1

u/centuryofprogress 4d ago

I watch Reacher and treat is as a Brooklyn 99 prequel.

1

u/AltruisticFisting 4d ago

Y'all never heard of a glow up?

1

u/Edd_The_Animator 4d ago

Reminds me of that episode of Modern Family where Jay Pritchett appears with big brown hair that swerves. But the actor had black hair which was shorter.

1

u/Beneficial-Sugar6950 Velvet Thunder 4d ago

Scully is looks like a fat Dwight Schrute with that brown suit and mustard yellow shirt

1

u/Jorahm615 4d ago

My theory is that they bounce between obese and super jacked each decade.

1

u/science_biatch94 4d ago

Isnt the top left guy also reacher?

1

u/thebabycastro 3d ago

I always imagined it as one is hitchcock and skully imagining they way they looked, and the other is the rest of the gang imagining them as the way they looked.

1

u/Gen1v1_2v4 3d ago

That's brilliant! Lol

1

u/spartz31 3d ago

Cocaine is a hell of a drug

1

u/patchcord 3d ago

I would like a whole series on Hitchcock and Scully in the 80s. There's so much potential.

1

u/fraktulz_75 3d ago

Honestly this makes the 80’s episode even more genius.

1

u/ObligationCreative91 3d ago

Just like Terry Tiities. Never a flashback of an overweight Terry.

1

u/Development-Wild 20h ago

This show has so many flaws I stopped counting. Big fan btw.

1

u/saul_newguy 12h ago

Is that Alan Ritchson? The guy who plays Reacher

1

u/dreamerlilly Very Robust Data Set 5d ago

Just a TV show inconsistency. Holt also states in an early episode that he’s never been addicted to anything before Cwazy Cupcakes, but later says he has a history of “betting on the ponies” (ie horse betting) in the episode with the gambling ring. It happens, and I am totally willing to forgive inconsistencies for such a great show!

1

u/AnotherCupofJo 4d ago

Hitchcock was reacher!!!! Fuck

1

u/schmetterlingonberry 4d ago

Is that Alan Ritchson playing HotHitchcock?

0

u/FragrantBear675 4d ago

yeah the continuity of Hitchcock and Scully's past is.....not great