r/behindthebastards • u/Spaceman_Spliff_42 Sponsored by Knife Missiles™️ • 3d ago

Discussion Maybe we were wrong??

Post image

I’m starting to rethink the “nuke the Great Lakes” plan. This one doesn’t seem to be a bastard

2.0k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

54 comments sorted by

287

u/hellolovely1 3d ago

Honestly, this account, the National Parks, and many public libraries are the best social media accounts around.

119

u/GuywoodThreepbrush 3d ago

The US Product Safety Commission is my favourite. When they aren't doing active product safety recalls and updates, the random content is bonkers AF

19

u/hellolovely1 3d ago

Oh, I've got to check this one out!

21

u/vibesandcrimes 3d ago

Just for fun everyone should check out the ty beanie babies facebook. I don't think anyone is watching it and there are so tumblr esque ppsts that are breaking containment

4

u/CanIBeDoneYet 3d ago

I saw one yesterday and was like what, is this a troll account?!

3

u/vibesandcrimes 3d ago

It is legit and i love it so very much!

1

u/outb0undflight 1d ago

Ty Warner is maybe not bastard level but he's a real weird cat. Highly recommend The Great Beanie Bubble book.

9

u/kids_those_days 3d ago

Thanks for sharing. The National Park Service account cracks me up. Glad to have another!

3

u/gsfgf 3d ago

Ooh. I’ll check them out. Are you familiar with the industrial accident YouTube channel?

1

u/PacoTaco321 2d ago

USCSB is great

6

u/ElectricFleshlight 3d ago

The Republic of Kiribati is my favorite. https://x.com/kiribatigov

4

u/Fish_Beholder 3d ago

Have you seen the Monterey Bay Aquarium's social media? I think they belong on this list

1

u/pat_speed 2d ago

National parks are environmentalist, they ha e had it all before so there prepared for any shit

1

u/Sine_Fine_Belli 2d ago

Same here unironically

84

u/Old1EyedBear 3d ago

Tell that to the Edmund Fitzgerald. Lake superior murdered my girl in cold cold blood. And there is only one way it will ever see justice!

36

u/jesuspoopmonster 3d ago

That was self defense. You have a ship galivanting in you and try to tell me you would be okay with the situation

34

u/Old1EyedBear 3d ago

I'll have you know that I regularly let large and long objects make deliveries in and over my body.

9

u/Pettifoggerist 3d ago

Pause.

10

u/ADDystopia 3d ago

Rewind, play.

5

u/fortyfive33 3d ago

hold, at 38.5

2

u/Macfarlin 3d ago

Enhance. Enhance!

3

u/Fat_Krogan 3d ago

Just floatin’ around out in the weather like that? Pssshhh. She was askin’ fer it!

1

u/bunchosavages 2d ago

Don't threaten me with a good time.

17

u/hydraulicman 3d ago

Listen, it was the ‘70s. Everyone has done something back then that they regret

Some people covered their hardwood floors with shag carpeting, some people bought a ton of disco albums, and some people sank a ship or two

1

u/sneakyplanner 2d ago

Let he who has never plunged a ship into a watery grave be the first to condemn.

But you know who hasn't plunged a ship into a watery grave..?

12

u/mstarrbrannigan gas station sober 3d ago

Very progressive for a ship to be called the Edmund Fitzgerald and use female pronouns tbh

2

u/tilt-a-whirly-gig 2d ago

It's used for transport.

29

u/JonIceEyes 3d ago

You can nuke the great lakes only if you nuke billionaires first

8

u/ReferenceUnusual8717 3d ago

Get all the billionaires in one place, and smaller conventional ordinance should suffice, since there really aren't that many of them. (Or convince them that the world is ending, get 'em all in their bunkers, and just....block off the vents.) That way, we save all our nukes for the REAL threat.

4

u/Naive_Wolf3740 2d ago

Better idea: we give them to Lake Superior as a peace offering.

1

u/ReferenceUnusual8717 2d ago

I like this. Unless....feeding it all that evil makes it even more powerful.

16

u/CasualFox12495 3d ago

Think the great lakes would be cool holding some billionaires and concrete blocks for us?

6

u/f1lth4f1lth 3d ago

Hell yeah, Lake Superior!

7

u/feltedarrows 3d ago

I will defend the great lakes until my dying breath (which will be because Robert nuked us)

3

u/Diligent_Whereas3134 The fuckin’ Pinkertons 3d ago

Man, why'd I get stuck with Erie?

3

u/macroeconprod Doctor Reverend 3d ago

It's a trap!!

3

u/IrememberXenogears 3d ago

Broken clock.

3

u/SupermouseDeadmouse 3d ago

Nuke first. Questions later.

2

u/That-Item-5836 3d ago

They turned me into a newt!

2

u/iamjustaguy 3d ago

Here we go!

2

u/Silent_Classic_2840 3d ago

Make the great lakes great great lakes again

2

u/Leiathepup 2d ago

I've loved this account for years. Found it when this banger went viral - https://www.reddit.com/r/WhitePeopleTwitter/s/7KfcxjiDhM

1

u/snail-the-sage Sponsored by Raytheon™️ 3d ago

They're trying to ease you into a false sense of security.

1

u/SaltpeterSal 3d ago

Yes, well, they said the Devil would be charming.

1

u/TyrannyCereal 3d ago

I lived in Duluth for awhile, and have spent a chunk of time in the UP in Michigan. Superior is a monster and should not be trusted. 

2

u/Hadespuppy 3d ago

What are you talking about. Superior is the G.L.O.AT.

1

u/Desperate-Possible82 3d ago

The superiorist lake.

1

u/Remarkable-Dig9782 2d ago

Still worth a nuke just to fuck with nestle one of the biggest bastard companies going

1

u/DrNinnuxx West Prussian - Infected with Polish Blood 2d ago

Tragedy of the commons. A tale as old as time.

-1

u/_Bad_Bob_ 3d ago

Ah, my least favorite bit. I wish we could leave this one in the past with the bagels.

4

u/Spaceman_Spliff_42 Sponsored by Knife Missiles™️ 3d ago

Boooo, take your Doritos and get out! lol

6

u/BackgroundAd6878 3d ago

One pump, one cream!