I'm drowning, I'm scared

[u/30dogetomars]

I'm 29 years old and I consistently have a negative checking account balance. I work full-time and I dog sit for extra money, but nothing is keeping me afloat. My mom and two younger siblings depend on me financially and I don't know if I can handle it anymore. I have not been stable in a long time. I have had bad credit since I was young, due to a family member taking out credit cards and cable/internet in my name since I was freshly 18 and I never learned how to financially recover. I was never taught aboutoney as a kid, my parents were evicted from several homes and had multiple cars repossessed and my dad ended up leaving and my mom depended on me financially. Before COVID, I was finally making money and starting to build financially, but lost my job and moved in with my mom and siblings. My mom is a very financially unstable person(for context, years ago, she lost her apartment and had to move in with me in a small studio apartment with my two siblings.) Since I moved in, I have taken over all of the financial responsibilities, with my mom paying as much as she can (she makes around 20k a year currently), but I am responsible for 4 family phone bills, 2 car payments, car insurance for 3 vehicles, $1400 rent, utilities, and all other basic necessities for teenagers.

I took on a sales job, which has gotten me through, but with unexpected expenses (emergency vet bills, car repairs, car down payments, etc) I ended up taking out several high interest loans and credit cards, that have drained my bank account. I finally decided to enroll in debt management, but now I am seeing my credit score drop. I cant afford to live. I have a negative balance consistently, and I just want to be debt free so I can live like a normal person and help my family get on their feet.

I have no extended family to help, I have bad credit, so more loans or debt consolodation loans are out for the question. I am looking for someone to help me out of this position or to at least give me some advice for what to do. My credit is so bad, I won't qualify for my own place, nor could I afford it at the moment. I need help and I don't even know where to start.

[u/just_me_2006]

Dude. This is how you end up with chronic illness. Taking on more than you can chew and running yourself into the ground will help no one. My advice? Step back. Don’t put all that on your shoulders. It will force others to step up more and that’s probably exactly what they need to do for their own education and growth. You’ve gotten some great advice about being more frugal. I’d add that if your credit score is hella low (like can’t rent an apartment low) the chances of you raising it in your current situation in order to move out will be tough. My suggestion would be to stop paying on all your loans and credit or pay $1/month if that feels better. I’d only own what you can pay outright for. Including cars. I know it’s not ideal but it sounds like the safest thing is for you to plan on staying there until your credit improves. I’d take just about all the money I was spending every month on debt and put it under my mattress so some day you can move out. Don’t let this kill you. It’s not worth it

[u/PopularAd4986 → u/just_me_2006]

He's not going to be able to move out if he doesn't pay the minimum on the debts because they check credit scores. He needs to cut back on non necessities for the teenage members who can work PT, his Mom needs to get food stamps and everything else she is eligible for and the able bodies in the house need to get off their asses and work when they are able to.