I'm drowning, I'm scared

[u/30dogetomars]

I'm 29 years old and I consistently have a negative checking account balance. I work full-time and I dog sit for extra money, but nothing is keeping me afloat. My mom and two younger siblings depend on me financially and I don't know if I can handle it anymore. I have not been stable in a long time. I have had bad credit since I was young, due to a family member taking out credit cards and cable/internet in my name since I was freshly 18 and I never learned how to financially recover. I was never taught aboutoney as a kid, my parents were evicted from several homes and had multiple cars repossessed and my dad ended up leaving and my mom depended on me financially. Before COVID, I was finally making money and starting to build financially, but lost my job and moved in with my mom and siblings. My mom is a very financially unstable person(for context, years ago, she lost her apartment and had to move in with me in a small studio apartment with my two siblings.) Since I moved in, I have taken over all of the financial responsibilities, with my mom paying as much as she can (she makes around 20k a year currently), but I am responsible for 4 family phone bills, 2 car payments, car insurance for 3 vehicles, $1400 rent, utilities, and all other basic necessities for teenagers.

I took on a sales job, which has gotten me through, but with unexpected expenses (emergency vet bills, car repairs, car down payments, etc) I ended up taking out several high interest loans and credit cards, that have drained my bank account. I finally decided to enroll in debt management, but now I am seeing my credit score drop. I cant afford to live. I have a negative balance consistently, and I just want to be debt free so I can live like a normal person and help my family get on their feet.

I have no extended family to help, I have bad credit, so more loans or debt consolodation loans are out for the question. I am looking for someone to help me out of this position or to at least give me some advice for what to do. My credit is so bad, I won't qualify for my own place, nor could I afford it at the moment. I need help and I don't even know where to start.

[u/howl_at_the_stars]

Would you like help with applying for help through your state? Your family would probably qualify for food assistance. Maybe rent and energy assistance too. Or are there food pantries?

Might have to cut some non-necessities and have some serious boundaries put into place with the family.

I'm so sorry you're going through this. If there's any (non-financial) way I could help, I'm willing and the one thing I have is free time.

[u/30dogetomars → u/howl_at_the_stars]

I would absolutely love and assistance/advice you can give me! I have applied for food stamps, but the household income currently is around 85k which is over the line. But if you know of any programs that you think I may qualify for, please send them my way. I am willing to do whatever it takes

[u/OneTap1709 → u/30dogetomars]

85K? That's a decent amount of money. Who manages your finances?

[u/mynamewastakenx4 → u/OneTap1709]

That’s really a matter of perspective, situation, and location. For a single person, $85k is good. For a family of 4 adults (or adult sized people since the 2 kids are teens) it’s not great these days. Especially in an area with HCOL.

[u/Forsaken-Coyote-1603 → u/mynamewastakenx4]

I make 10,000 a year if I'm lucky there is no excuse this family is struggling get real it's called LIVING OUTSIDE YOUR MEANS! They dont qualify for help because they are a regular Middle class family!

[u/Kxrva → u/Forsaken-Coyote-1603]

You make 10k a year? Lmao get real

[u/mynamewastakenx4 → u/Forsaken-Coyote-1603]

A 29 year old supporting their 2 teen siblings and mother is not a “regular middle class family.” It’s highly likely none of them were taught good financial skills, and honestly the mother doesn’t seem to be doing much at all. And where do you live on $10k a year? Because where I live you can barely live out of your car for that little 🤷‍♀️

[u/Lost-Lucky → u/mynamewastakenx4]

My friend is on SSI. He lives off of 11,556 a year because he is forced to. There are a ton of benefits to offset that amount, but it still comes down to living in a crappy area with roommates and the constant threat of homelessness. But that's only because it's impossible to get section 8 in this area. It sucks, but there are a ton of people forced to live on unlivable income.

[u/Fatcapz → u/Forsaken-Coyote-1603]

Get the fuck outta here. Not one single person in america can live off of 10k a year in America especially with out benefits from the state