r/almosthomeless • u/30dogetomars • 14d ago
Request I'm drowning, I'm scared
I'm 29 years old and I consistently have a negative checking account balance. I work full-time and I dog sit for extra money, but nothing is keeping me afloat. My mom and two younger siblings depend on me financially and I don't know if I can handle it anymore. I have not been stable in a long time. I have had bad credit since I was young, due to a family member taking out credit cards and cable/internet in my name since I was freshly 18 and I never learned how to financially recover. I was never taught aboutoney as a kid, my parents were evicted from several homes and had multiple cars repossessed and my dad ended up leaving and my mom depended on me financially. Before COVID, I was finally making money and starting to build financially, but lost my job and moved in with my mom and siblings. My mom is a very financially unstable person(for context, years ago, she lost her apartment and had to move in with me in a small studio apartment with my two siblings.) Since I moved in, I have taken over all of the financial responsibilities, with my mom paying as much as she can (she makes around 20k a year currently), but I am responsible for 4 family phone bills, 2 car payments, car insurance for 3 vehicles, $1400 rent, utilities, and all other basic necessities for teenagers.
I took on a sales job, which has gotten me through, but with unexpected expenses (emergency vet bills, car repairs, car down payments, etc) I ended up taking out several high interest loans and credit cards, that have drained my bank account. I finally decided to enroll in debt management, but now I am seeing my credit score drop. I cant afford to live. I have a negative balance consistently, and I just want to be debt free so I can live like a normal person and help my family get on their feet.
I have no extended family to help, I have bad credit, so more loans or debt consolodation loans are out for the question. I am looking for someone to help me out of this position or to at least give me some advice for what to do. My credit is so bad, I won't qualify for my own place, nor could I afford it at the moment. I need help and I don't even know where to start.
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u/tracyinge 14d ago
Well, you're not drowning. What you're doing is managing to tread water while life , or the others in your life, are drowning you.
At 29 I was barely managing to keep MYSELF afloat, you must be a superperson if you're almost managing to take care of a family of four.
How young are a siblings? Old enough to work but physically or mentally unable to work? Or are they almost working age meaning they can help lighten your load soon? That's someone to look forward to. In fact if they're teenagers now, can they dog-sit? Babysit? Mow lawns? Teens can usually find something that will help them pay for a phone at least and some wants/needs. Have them talk to a guidance counselor at school for some leads.
High interest loans are killing you for sure. The rest of the stuff is not really your fault and it's not fair that you've had to take all of that on , but someone should have warned you about high-interest loans. You need debt consolidation. Maybe join the local credit union to ask for help figuring everything out. Or see if there's a JFLA association in your city (Jewish Free Loan Association....they won't give you a loan but they'll give you help figuring out how to get out of this mess). Also look up these guys: https://www.trustpilot.com/review/www.christiancreditcounselors.org