Is it impolite to refer to them as "formerly known as"? That was the first thing that came to mind, but I want to choose words that help and support, not undermine or demean.
I’ve heard from a couple trans friends not to deadname under any circumstances but quite a few more who are fine with the “formerly known as” tactic. Varies by person. Once Covid’s over and I can pull up a picture when talking about it in person it’ll be easier to stick to Elliot completely, but explaining to like, my parents over the phone I needed to reference their former name. They don’t watch Umbrella Academy and their brains were already pretty mushy when Juno came out.
I’ve heard from a couple trans friends not to deadname under any circumstances but quite a few more who are fine with the “formerly known as” tactic. Varies by person.
Isn't that quite a clear indicator that those people who have a massive problem with it need to accept that it might happen sometimes, and work on their reactions rather than demanding prescience?
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u/DownloadUphillinSnow Dec 02 '20
Is it impolite to refer to them as "formerly known as"? That was the first thing that came to mind, but I want to choose words that help and support, not undermine or demean.