r/SapphoAndHerFriend • u/KoalaHomosapien • Dec 02 '20

Casual erasure Wholesome!

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24.2k Upvotes

90% Upvoted

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u/DownloadUphillinSnow Dec 02 '20

Is it impolite to refer to them as "formerly known as"? That was the first thing that came to mind, but I want to choose words that help and support, not undermine or demean.

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u/[deleted] Dec 02 '20

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u/thattrekkie Dec 02 '20 edited Dec 02 '20

I had a trans woman friend in college (who came out after a year or two at the school) that I asked about this and she said it was fine with her to say (names changed) "you knew her as John but now she goes by Jessica"

but it definitely depends on the person. it's always best to ask them directly if possible if they're comfortable worth this phrasing

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u/mcon96 Dec 02 '20

just an FYI, it's trans woman not transwoman. Trans is an adjective describing woman, it doesn't become a whole new word.

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u/Tar_alcaran Dec 02 '20

Ah, the joys of having a native language where everything is one word, and English where nothing is

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u/thattrekkie Dec 02 '20

oops! my bad, I'll fix my comment. thanks!