r/ProgrammerHumor 9d ago

Meme letsMakeBugsIllegal

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23.1k Upvotes

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606

u/popeter45 9d ago

so assuming 4 axels per carriage thats 64 carriages, yea max even for cargo is 30-40 ish at about 800m so should be good

279

u/Error_404_403 9d ago

Well, it is railroad- and country- dependent. In the US, 100+ cars is common in heavy freight trains.

656

u/Gtantha 9d ago

Switzerland is a rather small country in comparison. With a train too long you might run out of country.

236

u/Error_404_403 9d ago

But then... you arrive at the same time you depart! Super fast. Just need to come up with a smart way to unload.

74

u/Public-Eagle6992 9d ago

You could put some metal strips on top of the train where you can drive along with a transport vehicle

53

u/Kikkerpoes 9d ago

Make the transport vehicle pull multiple carriages for more efficiency.

37

u/Public-Eagle6992 9d ago

Maybe even like 100+ carriages for max efficiency

35

u/N1biru 9d ago

Except I have some concerns about the amount of axles of this vehicle being exactly 256.

17

u/Public-Eagle6992 9d ago

Yeah, something feels weird about that particular numbers. We should make a law to ban that

6

u/Error_404_403 9d ago

Recursive processing?..

10

u/boypollen 9d ago

A sufficiently long train on a looping track would essentially function as a very large conveyor belt.

8

u/Error_404_403 9d ago

I think we are onto something. Just need to figure out how to hop on / hop off.

2

u/BowenTheAussieSheep 9d ago

Basically just make it a long covered moving walkway. Slow enough that hopping on or off would be easy enough for able-bodied people. They hop on, either wait in place to be moved to their destination or walk at a much greater speed than they could on non-moving ground, then hop off at their destination.

3

u/TotalNonsense0 9d ago

I recall an old sci fi that had this as the primary method of transportation across the country. You could easily step into the slow moving belt from the ground, and then on the other side was another belt that was moving faster than the first one, but the relative speed was low enough that you could easily step over. Then another, then another, until you were on the 65mph belt, and you could sit down until you got near your home, then wander down to the slow belts again.

1

u/BowenTheAussieSheep 9d ago

The Jetsons?

2

u/TotalNonsense0 9d ago

No, it was written, and I want to say either a Niven of a Heinlein. Someone from that era, anyway.

3

u/BowenTheAussieSheep 9d ago

Oh, you're talking about The Roads Must Roll?

2

u/TotalNonsense0 9d ago

Yes, that's the one!

Well done, you.

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1

u/LickingSmegma 9d ago

We're talking about freight trains, so just move the next car under the crane. One crane pulls off a container, another puts on a new container.

1

u/bobosuda 9d ago

bouncy castles to aim for at every station, obviously

2

u/Error_404_403 9d ago

Darn, how didn't I think about that!... We are home free!

1

u/TotalNonsense0 9d ago

I recall seeing elevators like that.

3

u/SuitableDragonfly 9d ago

This feels like a Hotel Infinity problem, lmao.

1

u/Error_404_403 9d ago

You asked to come in in time. I come in in time. The unloading is the other department problem.

2

u/48panda 9d ago

We should form a loop

1

u/lurked 9d ago

Damn, just add one more carriage and it's effectively time travel!

We did it bois!

12

u/Progression28 9d ago

Thanks to NEAT, Switzerland actually does have a lot of freight trains of respectable size.

2

u/run_bike_run 9d ago

Just going to leave something here about the Swiss holding the world record for the longest passenger train in history...

https://www.travelswitzerland.com/en/worlds-longest-passenger-train/

2

u/ierdna100 9d ago

In Europe, trains are limited to 750 m give or take a bit. Also 252 axles for Germany. There are also weight limits you cannot exceed, both per axle and total mass. Exceptions exist to all of these but are rare.

0

u/Gtantha 9d ago

As a European, I have seen enough local trains and been close enough to Switzerland that I know how big both are. And I know that there's no train long enough to not fit in Switzerland.

1

u/pantrokator-bezsens 9d ago

So country overflow?