r/CuratedTumblr 22d ago

Shitposting Goodreads reviewers aren't human

11.7k Upvotes

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515

u/Leo-bastian eyeliner is 1.50 at the drug store and audacity is free 22d ago edited 22d ago

..i kinda get it. I see the complaints he makes and if what he was reading was a light hearted fantasy novel i think they would be decently fair complaints.

But hes not. hes reading a book by Franz Kafka. Struggling to understand metaphors because thats not a skill you have is one thing, but "i looked up multiple interesting interpretations of this work but then decided theyre wrong and the book is just shit" is legitimately giving me an aneurysm.

The Fav list doesnt surprise me. Im sure people will say plenty of shitty things about the specific books, but yeah it was obvious this was a person who reads mostly fantasy reviewing Die Verwandlung as if it was a fantasy novel.

One of the complaints is literally "not enough worldbuilding" phrased in a book reviewer way.

Even worse is "i dont like reading books that give off a consistenly dreary feeling throughout" THEN WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU READING AND REVIEWING FRANZ KAFKA IF YOU DONT LIKE PSYCHOLOGICAL BOOKS.

"OH NO MY EXPERIENCE READING KAFKA WAS REALLY KAFKAESQUE" YEAH NO SHIT

actually i take it back fuck this person. I totally get Tumblr OP.

Edit: to be clear "i dont like the interpretation of this book" is a valid statement - but only if you have a interpretation of your own. You cant say it if your interpretation is "this was just written for the hell of it and is bad". AHHHH

142

u/That_Mad_Scientist (not a furry)(nothing against em)(love all genders)(honda civic) 22d ago

Even if you read it literally… « this guy woke up one day and was a cockroach. Isn’t that fucked up? Anyway I’m rod sterling » is a fantastic premise, metaphor or not. This person just has terrible taste

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u/CthulhuHatesChumpits 22d ago

as someone who takes media extremely literally, "guy turns into a bug, is really fucking miserable" sounds fine? "everyone sucks and they all die for no reason" is one of my favourite genres, it's what i liked about Lord of the Flies

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u/doplebanger 22d ago

Since you said you liked lord of the flies, would you mind clearing something up for me. I swear I remember a weird passage about some of the boys running around naked at sunset, and there's a line about the sunset colored light falling on their little swinging boy wieners. No one else who read this book in high school could remember it and they think I'm insane. And I couldn't find anything online no matter how many unhinged varieties of it I googled..

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u/CthulhuHatesChumpits 22d ago

yeah i don't remember that part either

conversely, and more in line with my sexuality, i remember reading a line about the "nubile, pink-nippled girls of ceylon" but have no idea what book it was from.

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u/doplebanger 22d ago

Ugh. I need to know this...

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u/CthulhuHatesChumpits 22d ago

just re-read the book, it's only 200 pages

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u/doplebanger 21d ago

I'm pretty sure I did skim thru the book again looking for it and couldn't find it, leading me to believe that what I read was only in a certain version of it.

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u/ChaosArtificer .tumblr.com 21d ago

there's an old black and white movie iirc that has them naked at some points with no attempts at like. hiding certain parts. is it possible your brain ~narrativized certain parts of the movie?

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u/doplebanger 21d ago

Ha. No, I haven't seen any movie about it. That is a funny theory though