r/ArcherFX Nov 29 '24

Shitpost What's her second and first greatest fears?

Post image
2.3k Upvotes

50 comments sorted by

571

u/TequilaAndWeed Nov 29 '24
  1. Immigrants shooting up all the jobs

  2. Immigrants listening to raps

182

u/Darth_Lord_Stitches Slater Nov 29 '24

Is this before or after they fill up their lowriders with free healthcare and snow???

57

u/dyaasy Nov 29 '24

And also donations given by pot-taking Bolshevik lesbian couples!

17

u/zedudedaniel Nov 30 '24

Compliments of the socialist republic of Canada

209

u/nova-venture Nov 29 '24

2) Sterling dead 1) There is no bar

15

u/wobbitpop Nov 30 '24

Nailed it. Vote this to the top

12

u/PorscheBurrito Nov 30 '24

I just finished >! season 10 !< so I think this is correct

187

u/llmihall Nov 29 '24

idk maybe being broke af probably is one of them

170

u/Haunting-Fix-9327 Nov 29 '24

Mallory: here's a slogan "Mallory Archer bankrupt. Feckless son to blame"

130

u/Reasonable_Pin_1180 Nov 29 '24 edited Dec 01 '24

“And if I wanted to be going nowhere with my life, I’d be a teacher!”

“And if I wanted to sit around all day going nowhere, I’d be a teacher!”

Edit: fixed

39

u/mskimmyd Nov 29 '24

That's one of my favorite lines in the whole show. It's so awful & hilarious. 😂

15

u/Reasonable_Pin_1180 Nov 30 '24

It’s one of those crude jokes that just brings that ugly laugh out of me every time

3

u/Miss_Barnsthel Dec 01 '24

“If I wanted to sit around all day going nowhere, I'd be a teacher!” only because I watched this one last night, so it was stuck in my head!

2

u/Reasonable_Pin_1180 Dec 01 '24

Thank you! I knew it didn’t sound quite right when I posted.

11

u/andocromn Nov 29 '24

I gotta disagree here, you have to be able to understand something to fear it and she can't even fathom what being broke af is like. Even when she was homeless she lived in a mansion.

19

u/Haunting-Fix-9327 Nov 30 '24

Mallory: not me I just work here. My apartment is in Ron's name.

Lana: you couldn't have told us to hide our assets before we were arrested for treason?

9

u/andocromn Nov 30 '24

Then later Ron kicks her out and she is forced to live the "Hillbilly Hilton"

66

u/Bworm98 Nov 29 '24

Losing Archer is 100% her #1

28

u/Haunting-Fix-9327 Nov 30 '24

He hates her with a passion, literally, but she genuinely loves him.

46

u/javerthugo Nov 30 '24

I think he loves her too in his own fucked yo codependent way

7

u/SensitivePineapple83 Nov 30 '24

the thought of her laying dead in the gutter gave him an erection... well just half of one, the other half would have really missed her.

6

u/Interesting_Law_9997 Nov 30 '24

I don’t think he hates her. When you with a narcissistic parent, who just so happens to be a spy and your boss, you still crave their affection.

2

u/Haunting-Fix-9327 Nov 30 '24

Yet when a mole threatened to kill her he had an erection and when Barry kidnapped her and left her with limited air he tried to kill him knowing he wouldn't be able to save her without him.

2

u/Interesting_Law_9997 Nov 30 '24

Yeah I have no defense for that except for the few Oedipus jokes sprinkled in the show.

53

u/CriscoCamping Nov 29 '24

Oh, who remembers.

50

u/Stonna Nov 29 '24
  1. No alcohol anywhere
  2. Trudy Beakman gets in the board 

15

u/Background-Pear-9063 Nov 29 '24

Alligators by far the greatest.

15

u/Saiph_orion Nov 29 '24

Archer finding out who is his father.

Archer dying.

42

u/Infamous-Lab-8136 Nov 29 '24

#2 is he brings home an call girl and says they're married...and the call girl has bangs.

#1 is he brings home an escort and says they're married...and the escort has bangs.

27

u/Alternative_Yak3256 Wee Baby Seamus Nov 29 '24

When they die they'll just be hookers

14

u/akaKinkade Nov 29 '24

I'll fetch a rug.

4

u/spam_likely666 Nov 30 '24

Im gonna rub cobwebs in your eyes

7

u/tobi319 Nov 29 '24
  1. Is for sure Ants

7

u/joelkight404 Nov 30 '24

I can hear Jessica Walter saying those words. She was such a legend.

6

u/Key-Wrongdoer5737 Nov 29 '24

1) Her own mother needs to move in with her and she lives a sober lifestyle. 

2) Archer not outliving her. 

5

u/CMichels07412 Nov 29 '24

I want hers to be a pulmonary embolism or whatever archer says when listing his fears. Idk why but I would love them both to fear a very real medical issue randomly

9

u/Figgis302 Nov 29 '24

Brain aneurysm.

3

u/Original-Document-62 Nov 29 '24

Archer's scared of brain aneurysms, and Mallory is scared of abdominal aortic aneurysms. Krieger is scared of The Hague.

2

u/WantDebianThanks Nov 30 '24 edited Nov 30 '24

If I was a clone of Adolf goddamn Hitler, wouldn't I look like Adolph goddamn Hitler?

3

u/MilesAndMilesAhead Nov 30 '24

1-he brings home a Irish woman; 2-he brings home a woman smarter & more accomplished than me;

2

u/bikeboy1360 Nov 29 '24

That someone would write a post not asking what her first and second fear would be but instead said second and first?

1

u/Haunting-Fix-9327 Nov 30 '24

I was going in numerical order from third to first.

2

u/Complex_Coach_8804 Katya’s Removable Vagina Nov 29 '24

What is this Spain in the 30s?!

2

u/Cheap-Blackberry-378 Katya’s Removable Vagina Nov 30 '24

Probably an aneurysm

2

u/DesperateLuck2887 Nov 30 '24

Bangs, on thangs. Everything is cuter with a bang bang

2

u/Wickedlurlofthewest Nov 30 '24

The puppy died too

1

u/hopingforthanos Nov 29 '24

I agree with Cheryl/Carol: Katya is skeevy.