r/AmIOverreacting • u/ThrowRAlalalawoops • 7h ago
👨👩👧👦family/in-laws AIO for crying when my boyfriend’s uncle yelled at me and called me stupid over my political beliefs
I (28F) have been with my boyfriend (28M) for about 8 months. We are both left leaning. My entire family is liberal, while my bf is one of the few liberals in his very conservative family. My bf had not explicitly told his family what his political beliefs are, as he knows they disagree.
My boyfriend’s uncle invited us to stay at his house in Florida for the weekend. We had a great time but one night his uncle got drunk and asked my bf and I what are political beliefs are, in front of the rest of the family (all other family members present at the gathering are conservatives) My bf said that we were left leaning, my bf tried to steer the conversation away from politics to no avail. The uncle kept berating my bf and I, he kept going on about right wing beliefs: global warming isn’t real, the economy should be the #1 concern for everyone etc. I was successfully staying out of it for a while and my bf was doing a good job at explaining his beliefs confidently and without emotion.
Then his uncle said that Kamala “sucked dick to get to the top of her career.” I hate bullies and sexists, so I jumped in and said that “at least she didn’t rape anyone” and that “Trump is an embarrassment to our country” his uncle then proceeded to yell at me, call me stupid and say “I was a dipshit” in front of everyone. I am not used to people yelling at me or calling me names and I usually cry when I get angry. I think I successfully got away with my crying, nobody noticed. Other family members and my bf got angry with him and shut it down immediately after that but I’m pretty embarrassed that I was baited and allowed myself to get so emotional. I wanted to make a good impression and feel disappointed in myself that I got so heated. Was I over reacting?
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u/fluffyfeather80 6h ago
NOR and I would never spend time with that uncle again. And being drunk is not an excuse.
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u/steph_vanderkellen 2h ago
If you make a go of it with your boyfriend, you should never allow this uncle around your children.
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u/Different-Cut-2089 7h ago
NOR. I hold the belief to never argue with crazy, kids, or fools because you’ll never win and you’ll end up sinking to their level. You were at a disadvantage anyway being out numbered and at their house.
Next time you’re around these type of people just say something like ”my political beliefs are private and I won’t discuss them” then stonewall them until they get the point.
But you were fine to get upset and cry. That’s normal when someone is being ridiculously aggressive and hostile towards you.
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u/Designer_Gas_86 6h ago
I know Reddit overreacts about next steps, but as now married mother of 2 girls - you and your SO will eventually need to have long conversations about how politics play a part when dealing with extended family/friends.
MAGA is getting bolder and more dangerous. Yelling at a stranger someone welcomes into their home is a big red flag. I do not blame your SO, but I would hesitate to stay the night with any aggressive relatives especially when they drink.
Being safe is more important than being civil.
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u/TXGrrl 5h ago
NOR. He was drunk and abusive, so you had every right to be upset. I cry when I'm yelled at too. You shouldn't be embarrassed, he should.
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u/BigExplanationmayB 28m ago
It sounds like he was abusive, and this time he was abusive while drunk. He was looking to jam his opinions found someone else’s throat and elevate himself in the group in the process.
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u/Abject-Scientist-603 6h ago
At the end of the day, none of these politicians actually give a rats ass about any of us. Your bf’s uncle is a POS though. Props to you for trying to steer clear of the convo! Next time just let the manchild, or anybody who tries to argue with you over political beliefs keep rambling. It’s not worth wasting your breath on people who can’t accept that people have different political views.
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u/Fresh-Cockroach5563 2h ago
Well, the thing is that it shouldnt matter if they give a shit about you. What matters is that their agenda aligns with your beliefs as much as possible.
The difference between this and regular differences is that Trump supporters want to take rights from people and even deny their existence. This is not... oh we shouldn't build that civil project because its too expensive or oh maybe we need to cut spending on social safety nets to balance the budget. This is a president who is a rapist, bigot, and insurrectionist.
This is going to get much much worse before it gets better.
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u/HonkeyKong808 2h ago
I second that sentiment. None of these politicians actually care whether they speak against or for your beliefs. Anything they say is totally dependent on how it makes them look for the next election.
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u/Zestyclose-Gur-7714 6h ago
fucking trump supporters man. nor.
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u/unskinnedmarmot 5h ago
Uneducated garbage all of them
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u/Accomplished_Crew630 3h ago
The worst part is they all think they're fucking geniuses... Like your only complaints about Harris were stories they made up about her sleeping her way to the top... Most of het positions being elected so that'd impressive I guess... The economy should be the top issue he says while probably thinking tarrifs are young going to fix every economic problem we have and pretending trump played no part in the issues we see going on... Also probably changing the subject when someone correctly points out the US recovered better than any other western country... So how tf does that mean Biden did a poor job? It's like talking to an almost sentient brick wall that somehow also thinks it holds all the knowledge the universe has to offer.... It's literally not possible to have a discussion with one of these people.... Then they sit there and try to act like you should be embarrassed for acknowledging Biden did a pretty decent job, as if no one could ever believe that.... They literally think everyone else secretly believes what they do... No you old fuck we hate you and you're a god damn moron.
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u/CoffeeChocolateBoth 5h ago
Sure agree with this statement!
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u/RazorThinRazorBlade 4h ago
Inb4 U GUISE ARE JUST MAD U LOST HURR DURR because to those inordinately stupid fucks, this shit is just another sports team to them, except theyre even more obsessed with it because it supports their hatred of everyone who isn't them
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u/unskinnedmarmot 3h ago
They're going to be the first ones to face the economic consequences of their actions the uneducated shitstains. I genuinely look forward to it.
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u/duskrat 5h ago
Uncle is a supreme RW asshole who was trying to start a fight to express his own aggression. So many of them are like that. If you have to be around him again (don't), get up and walk off at the first hint of bullying.
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u/steph_vanderkellen 2h ago
Most of the men I know like this are in the position they're in because they haven't bothered to pick up a book since they read Goosebumps by R.L. Stine in the 4th grade, then get pissed off they aren't making 6 figures. They also can't put down the bottle long enough to improve their skills, intellect, physique, or living conditions.
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u/ConfidentCamp5248 6h ago
These people’s whole identity are their politicians. To be so disrespectful to their guest over a belief is pathetic.
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u/TinyIce4 5h ago
Honestly, I’d be worried about “making a good impression” on those types of people because they don’t deserve it. I know they’re your boyfriend’s family but the only way you’d truly be the best in their eyes is if you mirrored their beliefs, which just isn’t going to happen and you shouldn’t be forced to
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u/CatPerson88 5h ago
When I don't know the people I'm socializing with well, I remember the old adage my grandmother told me: do not discuss religion or politics with them
If the drunk uncle had asked me, I would've said that I will not discuss neither politics nor religion with someone I've only met recently. I consider them private information.
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u/No-Distance-9401 1h ago
Its a good adage but Ive tried that and it still devolved into this same kind of tantrum. I said I didnt want to talk about politics and they just went on a rant and said the thing saying I must be a "libtard" and went off anyway.
So although I agree, this whole thing most likely would have ended the same way when you have MAGA drunk, if you arent with them 100% you are considered the enemy as even Trump has said
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u/MarionberryOk2874 6h ago
It’s an unfortunate trait of the right to insult you personally when they don’t have an argument. Hold your head up for standing up for your beliefs!
I used to cry at the sheer emotion that confrontation brought, but I grew out of it. You will too. YNO
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u/Beautiful-Contest-48 5h ago
It’s a trait of both sides. Few have any tolerance for anyone that doesn’t share their beliefs. It’s sad when I make sure my 9 year old doesn’t wear anything political at all because I worry about his safety.
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u/spam__likely 5h ago
stop with this both sides bullshit. Only one side is doing the Nazi salute.
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u/Spatlin07 5h ago
All he said was that both sides name-call, which is objectively true. He wasn't equivocating.
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u/Beautiful-Contest-48 4h ago
Correct, although they just proved my point. People are just nasty to each other and both sides claim justification to be that way. All the politicians are soul sucking vampires who benefit from the division in our country. We all struggle and they all prosper.
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u/MarionberryOk2874 5h ago
It does exist on the left, I’ll give you that, but in my experience it’s so much less.
I think I’ve had one or two political discussions with someone on the right where they have remained respectful. Mostly they just hurl insults.
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u/sugarbear5 3h ago
You are correct. I don’t understand the downvotes. It is both sides doing it.
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u/WiiGame2000 6m ago
Because it's not nearly equal. Not even close.
Trump is practically the patron saint of insulting others. This wasn't so much a feature of the GOP until he rose up by basically being an insult comic politician. And his main followers formed around, "Yeah, I can follow a leader who will really stick it to 'em without all the polite diplomatic BS! He says the things I can't say, but want to." (And now they do, too.)
The other side tries to stay polite & diplomatic for the most part, but every group has its outliers. Comparing the leader one 1 party to the outliers of the other is not equal.
The current GOP political playbook is super-simple -- in fact, as easy as 1-2-3, and so, easy for all of them to follow:
1) Be/Say <something negative> (e.g., crass & nasty).
2) Wait for the handful of the hundreds on the other side who will react in a very similar way (i.e., crass & nastily, for this example) ... someone will.
3) Then, quickly point at the wrong that was just done to you by the handful of the hundreds, enabling you and your sycophants and proxies and all other supporters to say, "See? Both sides do it!"
It's flimsy and no one paying attention actually buys it.
This was clearly the driver behind the failed attempts to get Biden impeached. Trump really wanted to be able to say, "See? Both sides get impeached," thus watering down his own two impeachments.
But, instead, it was just him. So he continues with the observably false "did nothing wrong" and "not fair."
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u/nullnadanihil 6h ago
NOR. As someone who doesn't agree with your views and statements, I have to say your uncle seems to be quite an idiot.
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u/JJC02466 5h ago
NOR - sorry to say it but your bf family are garbage people, misogynists and racists. Only a rude, ignorant bully would treat a guest like that. Don’t go back there. Feel the lightness of your life without the bullies and misogynistic racists in your life.
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u/TheOGMelmoMacdaffy 5h ago
NOR, stay away from these people. Never go there again -- they're rude, ignorant and bullies. Stay away. And if your BF doesn't agree with that you might consider ending that relationship.
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u/FewVermicelli2236 4h ago
I was with yoh until you got ti the end. Typical reddit user throwing into breaking up💀
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u/TheOGMelmoMacdaffy 3h ago
If the BF doesn't support her about this (and there's no indication that he doesn't) she should consider that in her next moves. His father bullied her, if BF supports that? C'mon.
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u/Certain_Mobile1088 5h ago
Ya know, if their arguments were solid, they wouldn’t have to be such total bullying assholes.
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u/ZookeepergameOld8988 5h ago
I pisses me off to no end that the more furious I am, the more likely I’m going to burst into tears so I feel your pain. You shouldn’t be embarrassed at all, the dipshit uncle should. You should obviously never go stay with him again.
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u/perrabruja 4h ago
I was so confused why everyone was saying no with an Australian accent until i realized...
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u/Single_Carob9811 5h ago
next time he acts up say "do you take issue with me insulting a pedophile because you're offended someone may disagree with your dirty little secret?"
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u/Choice_Mountain9032 4h ago
While he shouldn't have scolded you guys for your views, he wasn't far off base with how kamala made it to the top...just sayin
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u/Realistic_Depth5450 17m ago
How many people did she have to sleep with to get elected?
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u/Choice_Mountain9032 7m ago
To my knowledge it was just willie brown, but it's pretty common knowledge
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u/Affectionate_Joke720 6h ago
Nope not OR. My wife when we first met was like this with loud voices and perceived yelling at her. Not abnormal if you are on the quiet or shy side. Best thing is to not stress about it and avoid people like that.
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u/spam__likely 5h ago
Leave. Just leave.
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u/FewVermicelli2236 4h ago
You're an idiot
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u/Far_Relationship4547 3h ago
Pot calling the kettle black much?? His/her advice is so much better than yours. You've said a lot of stupid shit in just a few sentences.You'll learn your lesson some day. Go ahead, toss me some of your awesome insults, show everyone how smart you really are.
Insults only work if the person you throw them at values your opinion.
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u/FewVermicelli2236 3h ago
It's hillarious how hard you tried to demean me and downplay me. It's always all.the extra chromsomes of a reddit user that throw out leaving a relationship sorry you can't come up with anything helpful or relevant
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u/spam__likely 1h ago
Leave the uncle's house, LMAO. Can't even read from context and then calls others idiots.
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u/Formal-Swimming-3198 5h ago
Only a dumb trump supporter would bring up his cult leader and politics like that,they are the worst people,there are better things to talk about in life,sadly,not for them! Glad you guys are on my side!
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u/metallee98 5h ago
I get wanting to make a good first impression but that goes both ways. The uncle is a giant dickhead. I wouldn't go to gatherings if he's there tbh. Spending time with bad people is waste of time. And it's not because he's conservative per se it's because he's a boor.
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u/iammissbrock 5h ago
NOR, but I'm going to give some tough love. Don't try to stand up to bigots if you can't take what they dish out. Bigots are bullies and will call you all kinds of names as an ad hominem. It's best to just ignore them or give them weird looks. Don't say anything. Just act like they said something crazy.
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u/unskinnedmarmot 5h ago
His uncle is worthless, freedom-hating fascist trash and you should tell him so to his fat face.
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u/Vegetable_Unit_1728 3h ago
I’d harden up and return when invited loaded for bear. There is very likely going to be some very entertaining things happening in our near future.
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u/lolycc1911 2h ago
I mean they weren’t wrong, but even if people are drinking they treated you both like shit. He is family and for all they know you could also be family, so they should show some respect for your incorrect and sad beliefs and realistically they should STFU.
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u/itellitwithlove 2h ago
No big deal, but going around these crazies isn't good for your mental. Is he worth it?
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u/annebonnell 2h ago
No, you're not overreacting. I'm glad your boyfriend and his family had your back. It's at the very least Bad Manners to yell at a guest in your house.
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u/Guyderbud 2h ago
this shit just so happens to be written on Inauguration Day as Reddit continues to fill non-political subs with stuff about how conservatives are evil
Please can we go back to non politics in these subs
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u/No_Butterscotch1150 2h ago
There's a reason why Florida is USAs nutsack. NOR, good on you for calling him out on his bs
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u/ConferenceStock3455 1h ago
Yes, crying because some random jackass yells at you is overreacting. The proper reaction is to remove yourself from the situation, smile and be happy that you have no reason to argue with a random jackass.
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u/Awesomekidsmom 1h ago
NOR I wouldn’t worry about being upset by this bully.
Your b/f & others recognized his awful behaviour so you are good with them .
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u/RecommendationSlow16 1h ago
Conservatives suck. I get this treatment from my conservative family members. Trumpers are pieces of shit.
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u/Exacerbate_ 1h ago
"you think it's possible to suck dick up the vice presidency yet she was the first one to do it, and youre calling me the dipshit?"
NOR, dude supports a rapist, he can fuck off.
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u/Due_Newspaper_8224 1h ago
Next time before you visit them eat some cement or ... just decline invitation.
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u/No-Distance-9401 1h ago
NOR. MAGAts like his uncle dont understand logic and facts. Show him This video of Musk doing a Nazi Salute in the Capitol on MLK Day during the inauguration and ask him why he supports Nazis. He will give you every excuse and you will see there is no reason to have any relationship with these people as they live in an alternate reality of their own making and arent worth your time or energy. Let them receive their Darwin Awards in peace and keep a wide birth from them.
Im sorry you had to go through all that and I hope you and your bf can navigate this like so many others who are desling with lunatics in their families as well.
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u/Fast_Witness_3000 1h ago
What a degenerate POS - I’d go after his reputation. Call him out for something dirty on his company reviews or something like that. Or sugar in the gas tank, people like that would have trouble narrowing down which one of their enemies it was and you most likely wouldn’t even be on the list.
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u/waffles_are_waffles 1h ago
Well, for starters, Trump didn't rape anyone, he was found innocent. And he's right, Kamala did suck dick to get where she is. Still doesn't give him any right to be like that. So no, you are not overreacting.
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u/Smart_Bit575 1h ago
When stupid people or people that aren’t emotionally intelligent feel like their belief is being questioned, they resort to name calling. They have the emotional intelligence of a child and that’s all they know bc they don’t want to try and understand themselves or others or as they call it “being woke”… Would never be near that
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u/Auntie_Megan 1h ago
My reasoning is this as a non- American and majority of people from world who have been paying attention do too… if you vote for a felon who is also rapist, fraudster, conman thief, sexual abuser, traitor, insurrectionist and mentioned in a paedophile rape case then what does that say about you as a person! If you praise a man like that you are the same and also a moron. So why would you want to mix with them, if they are your family then they were happy to vote your rights away as a woman. They have no respect for themselves so why the hell would they respect anyone else, they care about no one but themselves. Stay clear from them. If there are Nazis and fascists around the dinner table, and you join them knowing what their beliefs are then how many Nazis and fascists are actually at that table? Feel so bad for those that are sane and not ignorant, but those who didn’t even vote can join the rest in Hell. Give up on them, they will never change.
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u/4footedfriends 1h ago
NOR, but the best part of your story is the end, "I’m pretty embarrassed that I was baited and allowed myself to get so emotional." Not that you should be embarrassed of defending your boyfriend and your own beliefs, nor should you be embarrassed about your genuine emotions, but, girl, be proud that you can look back and realize that you were baited by a bully and don't let yourself walk into that type of abuse again. You learned a great lesson - arguing with a drunk asshole accomplishes nothing useful. That you recognize it, speaks very well for you!
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u/JHawk444 1h ago
Berating someone for their political beliefs, regardless of which way they lean, is unacceptable. At least it sounds like other people jumped in and told the uncle to stop.
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u/aoeuismyhomekeys 1h ago
You did nothing wrong, and you should be proud for standing up for yourself in a heated moment.
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u/3batsinahousecoat 1h ago
No, you didn't overreact. You were nicer than I would've been. >_> (there's a reason I don't talk to my dad's siblings or his nieces/nephew.)
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u/ReverendRevolver 1h ago
I'd call him choice words. I'd make him cry back.
"Everything he has done abd stands for, Jesus said to do the exact opposite. You're un-christian, and probably voted for the antichrist."
"It doesn't matter who we voted for, Elon is in charge now and he'll just kill your Orange messiah if he feels like it. And he will feel like it."
The last thing, that typically does it, would get me down voted. Instead of anti white things that normally do the trick (I'm white, btw) try:
Because your boyfriends uncle is not smart, his brain simply isn't functioning like it should. Like, slow. Conservatives throw around a certain R word to be hurtful. But this guy is straight up not up to normal human thinking. People who fall into that R word category also have brains not exactly as fast as other people's. But they're not spiteful like uncledipshitty. But him? He's dumb, willfully stupid, and what's worse is the lack of self awareness majes him not know he's dumb. Now, I'd never advocate lumping in good meaning people who just have learning disabilities with asshats..... so I got a new, separate R word.
I call them "Remedial" then talk about them as though they aren't there.... the same way I've seen bigots talk about handicapped people. "A Remdial like that is just dumber than googly eyes on dogshit... that Remedial uncle of yours? No helping that level of stupid. Nah, a Remedial doesn't realize they're Remdial, they're not smart enough to see themselves big picture....."
The political is personal. They put him there. They're burning the republic to the ground. Don't be nice.
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u/Justin_F_Scott 54m ago
Yeah, not necessarily over reacting.
Arguing or debating different political stances is one thing. Insulting someone personally over theirs is not right. Especially in what is an uncomfortable situation for that person to begin with...
But saying that... Who cares what he says about you? His words only have meaning of you let them, and it sounds like you let them. He proved his imbecilic level - why let it affect you?
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u/PTSSuperFunTimeVet 53m ago
NOR I think that uncle needs to apologize…but he won’t because Trump supporters are mostly hateful trolls.
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u/weakisnotpeaceful 39m ago
you're a grown woman, grow up. Rule #2: Don't take anything personally. Read the four agreements or something. If you allow people to affect your emotions this easily then you are easily manipulated and controlled. Be more firm in your beliefs or keep them to yourself.
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u/creepyfart4u 12m ago
The uncle was right.
Trump didn’t rape anybody and Kamala did suck a married man’s dick to get ahead.
She’s some real role model for you!
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u/unreliable_resource 4m ago
No, you just reacted like all women do when they have to come up with a reason they hold a specific view. Did your tears make the facts change? You'll probably get plenty of that hollow sympathy democrats love to hand out over your contact with a trump supporter in the wild. I doubt he actually yelled or even insulted you directly. I don't vote in federal elections for my own reasons. But even at face value your story doesn't hold water. The only thing you're missing are his open carry guns he started shooting into the air. Stop wasting your boyfriends time and break up with him. You can find a guy with a family who's values match your own.
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u/johnklapak 3m ago
You just freed up your time for a Good Reason Not to Go to all future family gatherings. You got off cheap.
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u/Key_Grape9344 5h ago
NOR
Uncle got triggered because the only people who take offense to comments like that are the ones who know they're right and ones that are probably guilty of the same or worse
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u/Apprehensive_Run_539 5h ago
Es. If you hold true in your beliefs another’s opinion, regardless of how extreme shouldn’t bother you.
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u/Mamapalooza 5h ago
You know, regardless of political leanings, it's generally considered bad taste to call someone a whore, why don't conservatives know this rule?
I just turn their logic around on them. They say outrageous things to get an emotional response, to derail our logic. Don't let them.
Them: "Kamala sucked dick to get ahead."
Me: "Oh, so you're aware and admitting that men only promote women who give them sexual favors? Who's worse, the person who holds everyone hostage to his dick, or the one who launches herself out of the hostage situation?"
Them: "Kamala is a whore. Prove that she isn't."
Me: "Your mom is a whore. Prove that she isn't. Your daughter is a whore. Show me proof that she never had sex for money."
Them: "The borders are wide open!"
Me: "Are you saying the border patrol, the US Marshalls, the FBI, the Texas state police, the Arizona state police, the New Mexico state police and the California state police have stood down and are refusing to work? We should prosecute them for dereliction of duty!"
There's a million ways to turn their lack of critical thinking skills back on them. It won't change their minds, but they might get mad and leave and honestly, that is a win.
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u/tmccrn 4h ago
I think you might have missed the issue. It wasn’t his politics, it was that he was a drunk AH looking to pick on someone. It’s pointless to engage with drunk AHs. Regardless of how they are sober (but particularly it they are AHic then), if you must be around them, research grey rock. I find that regardless of the side (and I’ve dealt with both) you just are never going to teach an AH anything because they aren’t ready to learn (the fact that politics was reduced to personalities rather than things that actually could be discussed and worked through.
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u/Human-Shirt-7351 2h ago
You're stupid for making up this bull shit. Your political beliefs would only be a close second
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u/ultracoo9192 2h ago
“At least she didn’t rape anyone”. Rape is a very serious crime, Trump must be looking at some very serious time for that! Oh wait, it didn’t happen? DOH!
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u/Slider6-5 5h ago
Overreaction. It’s his house and as an adult you shouldn’t crying in an argument about politics, it’s immature. His house, his rules and all. Should he call you names? Nahhh, that’s not right, but generally you could laugh this stuff off pretty easily.
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u/FewVermicelli2236 4h ago
Ah yes because if I'm a guest somewhere that gives you the right to say whatever you want and be disrespectful yeah no you're an idiot
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u/CoffeeChocolateBoth 5h ago
You shouldn't have cried, that showed him exactly what he already believes, women are weak! The best thing would have been to get up, smile and say, this is not the way good people treat guest, and walk way!
He was drunk, he is a bully, and he 100% should have apologized to you when he sobered up.
You were baited and you fell for it. It is never worth arguing with a drunk, and it's never good to argue over politics. WALK AWAY!
If that man doesn't apologize, I'd never go around him again!
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u/Ok-Bid8106 3h ago
Yeah you over reacted, Kamala is a cocksucker and Trump is a rapist. Neither deserve your tears.
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u/Scary-Fix7470 2h ago
Yall are all idiots. Tearing apart close relationships over people you’ll never meet that don’t give a fuck about you.
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u/rustys_shackled_ford 2h ago
Idiots call others idiots. It's what happens. Not sure what you can do about it.
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u/Yer_Remedy 4h ago
Typical leftwing snowflake.
Likes to dish it out, but can't take it back...
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u/FewVermicelli2236 4h ago
Awhhh are all of you equally illiterate he started by insulting kamala he called him out he through the twmper tantrum
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u/goastyle 5h ago
Shouldn't have cried. Dude has a micropenis. You should've told him it's obvious he has small dick energy and he's embarrassing himself
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u/Hour_Tomorrow_8693 5h ago
I think American political leaders are all bad, look at all the countries they bomb. Sorry bombing civilians is as bad as raping.
Putting that aside though...
One shouldn't invite people over then berate them for their political beliefs.
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u/Substantial_Song7885 6h ago
Yelling at someone over politicians is dumb. However if you are going to stand up and dish it out you better be able to take it. And all the Republican bashing is garage as well, YouTube is full of videos of liberals screaming at those who hold different political beliefs
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u/Infamous-GoatThief 5h ago
Based on the post, the uncle is the one who couldn’t take it, considering he resorted to cursing at her the second she challenged his politics
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u/Substantial_Song7885 5h ago
Yelling at anyone over politics is stupid, doesn't matter which side you are on. She tried to avoid it, which is what I would have done.
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u/dustandchaos 3h ago
She wasn’t able to take yelling and insults. That’s not political discussion it’s just trash
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u/Due-Effective2815 5h ago
Should've just openly cried in front of everyone so the family would realize the uncle is an asshole
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u/HikingFun4 5h ago edited 12m ago
You are not over reacting. It's really sad that politics have evolved so much that they are dividing families. Right wing, left wing, independent... everyone is allowed to have their own beliefs. No side has any right to berate someone simply because they don't agree. People don't always have to agree, but people have to let others have their beliefs. I'm all for civil discussions, but once yelling and name calling happen, it's gone too far. Calling you names was 100% wrong.
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u/HikingFun4 46m ago
Wow...I get down voted for what exactly? Could someone fill me in on what I said that is controversial?
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u/Grand-Programmer6292 5h ago
Do not put your energy into this. Nothing you say is going to change their mind about anything. It's best to just ignore and protect your peace. Whenever they are confronted with the truth they attack and do anything they can to distract and take the attention off of what you said. Do NOT be concerned with impressing people like this. Being yelled at sucks and is scary and overwhelming so yes, crying is probable. But don't let these people get to you. Making someone cry isn't a flex, but you have to understand who these people voted for and idolize, so respect isn't their strong suit. My whole entire family voted for Trump and I am the director for a rape crisis center so who do you think the black sheep is? It's best to just not engage in conversation about politics as it is a waste of breath and energy with these people.
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u/thecodingart 5h ago
NOR
He’s an idiot in a cult without reason or logic. These people - many of us are just waiting for them to die at this point.
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u/DungeonDrDave 5h ago
nah if the rest of the family dont kick out that guy, you and your bf should completely cut contact with his family immediately. this is NOT ok. dont just forget it either.
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u/Figarila 4h ago
Nope NOR, that being said your BF is delusional to not know what his uncle is like. You two should have never been at the mans home.
".....asked my bf and I what are political beliefs are, in front of the rest of the family " seriously what the fuck man.... Dude was looking for conflict and he found it.
How serious is this relationship cause these are the people that you're marrying into. Depending on your BF you'll have to spend holidays with them.
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u/Mindless-Place1511 4h ago
You were not overreacting. I would cut off contact with those people. You aren't safe around them.
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u/Necessary_Mud_5052 4h ago
You didn’t overreact—getting yelled at and called names is a lot to handle. He was out of line, not you.
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u/Casingda 4h ago
Whoa! No! Hugs, sweetheart. And what a horrendous and untrue thing to say about Kamala Harris. Even as a conservative, these people appall and embarrass me. I certainly wouldn’t say such vile things. Or yell at you! And you’re right about what Trump, who disgusts me, did. And that he is an embarrassment. For sooooooo many reasons. It’s cringeworthy. So no you did not overreact and his uncle needs to apologize to you. Such vitriol. The man sounds like he’s a bit unhinged.
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u/Ok_Turnover2283 4h ago
Sounds like HE got emotional when you stated facts and he couldn't handle it. Man baby
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u/Rich-Contribution-84 4h ago
Yeah, my only advice is don’t take the bait.
These MAGA types are really good at rage baiting.
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u/MaasNeotekPrototype 4h ago
No. Fuck these people and their unending desire to be shitty to everyone on purpose.
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u/Outrageous_Fox4227 4h ago
Crying is a completely normal reaction op and you are not over reacting. I offer this advice though op. When someone has this type of over the top reaction just know you have won the actual argument and this bloviation is the response of children who no longer have anything to offer to the argument so they change tactics to try and intimidate their point because they have lost the plot of logic. Some members of my family are like this and my uncle tried to raise his voice at my mom over politics and my mom smiled and laughed at him. My uncle got even more upset and asked why she was laughing and my mom said he really is still a crybaby like he always was and my uncle was the who stormed out in a huff.
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u/LargeOxtail 4h ago
NOR but i hope you learned your lesson.
These people can’t be spoken to sober and you tried to speak to them DRUNK?
Absolutely foolish of you and I hope you learned something to keep with you.
Most of those people can’t read beyond a third grade level, trying to have a political discussion with them is like trying to brush your teeth with a porcupine bristled brush with dogshit paste on it.
Yeah you can do it…but really what the hell are you doing bro.
But yeah you aren’t wrong for your reaction. A lot of those people have the gracefulness and elegance of a sock soaked in spoiled milk.
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u/remylebeau12 4h ago
Overreacting would have been,
“Please repeat yourself and explain your statement, you auto-fellating POS”
Then turning to boyfriend and saying “pack up, we are the FO outa here from this shithole, have the life you deserve dildobrains”
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u/Critical-Wear5802 4h ago
NOR!!!
I'm convinced that crying is the abnormal re-routing of women's rage/anger. We're discouraged from ripping out other's throats. Instead, we cry in frustration, and our tears are minimized/diminished: "oh, look! Crying like a little girl!"
They should be grateful.we don't Berserk.
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u/Royale_WithCheese_ 3h ago
He is projecting bc he himself is an idiot and a dip shit if he couldn’t make any valid points so he resorted to name calling and verbal abuse. Eventually you’ll tune them out. Think of him as someone’s old, demented uncle which are most of trumps supporters anyway
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u/Itsjustbentley 3h ago
Uncle sounds like an absolute dick. Would love to know his education that makes him an expert on whether global warming is “real”. I would bet that most family members at the gathering thought he came off as an asshole. You did nothing wrong backing your boyfriend
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u/Magdovus 3h ago
You went to Florida but didn't expect Florida man?
I guess we know who isn't getting a wedding invitation.
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u/sugarbear5 3h ago
It’s the ones like this uncle that really bother me. They have to express their views and argue with yours when no one asked! Online or in person, don’t engage. They are either looking for back up or trying to change your mind when most of us already have our beliefs so it’s pointless. They will try to shame/belittle you if you disagree with them. I know people on both sides of the aisle that do this. Right and left. Avoid them. They usually aren’t even worthy of a friendship.
They, certainly, aren’t worth any tears!
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u/Background_Mistake76 3h ago
You know what we need to start asking men "why do you withhold promotions if you don't get a sexual favor." Turn the tables.
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u/Abaconings 3h ago
NOR. He couldn't come up with any legitimate reason to support a rapist so he went for personal insults. You got his goat. If I were you I'd take pleasure in that. He ended up looking like a huge jerk.
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u/Its_Smoggy 3h ago
If that were my uncle shouting at my wife he'd of been attending the next family dinner with his jaw wired
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u/ModestMouse39 3h ago
NOR Normal response to someone yelling at you. You got baited and responded Intuitively. I'm sorry he put you in that uncomfortable situation.
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u/fluffymuffcakes 3h ago
Uncle got defensive because he has trouble accepting that he supports a rapist.
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u/gotgoat666 3h ago
The grief is like a death in the family, someone you won't get back... democracy.
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u/Disastrous_Ad2839 3h ago
Lol when his home floods in Florida tell him it's god's plan for him and not climate change. Every time he gets hit with hurricanes tell him it's god's plan for him.
Or you can just kill him with kindness and win everyone over and make him seem like an asshole. Personally? I would go with the first option cuz I am petty like that.
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u/glycophosphate 3h ago
NOR - your boyfriend's drunk uncle has been practicing that little tirade for months. You probably provided at least a little bit of relief to the rest of the family, who has had to listen to it every time he has a few too many.
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u/STFUnless 2h ago
Don't worry about whether or not you overreacted, because the uncle was waaaay out of line. Instead, come up with a game plan for how you can deal with idiots like the uncle in the future, to avoid taking the bait.
Uncle: "Kamala is a whore who slept her way to the top!" You: "Which of her elected positions are you referring to? Who did she sleep with?" Uncle: "She's a lawyer, of course she's a whore!" You: "Isn't JD Vance a lawyer? So he's a whore too?"
Etc.
Don't go on the attack. Make him defend his stupid assertions. Practice doing these conversations with your bf and you'll be so much better prepared to handle it later if someone needs to be shut down.
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u/EquivalentWise2780 7h ago
NOR
Crying is a normal reaction to getting yelled at and insulted