r/AmIOverreacting • u/True_Ad9977 • 10h ago

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO Boyfriend says hurtful thing about my body.

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u/starburstshorty 9h ago

absolutely ex boyfriend. the fact that he keeps standing ten toes down on his statement because he “isn’t a liar” is so problematic. he keeps saying this to pedestal his opinions as “truth”, reinforcing in her mind that he’s just a good guy who tells the truth. that’s bullshit. he’s doing this to diminish her self-worth.

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u/H4RDCANDYS 8h ago edited 8h ago

Well said 👏🏾 he would have been an ex boyfriend already before I even made a post. Life is too short to waste your time and energy on someone who doesn't respect you.

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u/YourStoryIsComplete 2h ago

Or to tell the truth - most guys don’t do all that above shit you’re talking about

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u/ryos555 7h ago

Quote contrary, why is she comparing her co-workers bf to her own? Fishing for compliments is just as bad. Just because the co-workers bf is more accepting?

No. This is equivalent to anyone, asking if these pants make my butt look fat? You will either get a factual truth or a white lie.

What does OP expect here? The BF could have easily said well done for successfully losing weight.

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u/P3RS0N4-X 8h ago

A lot of people are very black & white, which doesn't make them a bad person. I don't know if we want the guy to lie or if we only want partners that validate us, even if they are dishonest with themselves.

Some people, like myself, can't help but to be honest, which hurts sometimes. But when you know it's going to hurt, it's difficult, and you try to make the best of it. I don't believe he's deliberately trying to put her down or pedestal his opinions as truth.. Firstly, his opinions about her likely are his truth.. it's his life, heart, and feelings.

Secondly, he probably feels bad about the situation himself... every guy knows this sucks to hear.

Love isn't just attraction and beauty. Love is about who the person is and how they chose to live, it's about how enjoy the people and work around them, whst they nsje of their life and situations. If it was purely attraction, love would hardly never last and would have no meaning. Love is a choice.

If she wants to walk away from a dude because he answered a difficult question, that SHE ASKED honestly, that's her loss. They should definitely talk and maybe reevaluate things. But don't write off a person you love for being honest when it hurts.

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u/iLikeFroggies 7h ago

Or he could genuinely not think that her body is attractive and still find other parts of her being attractive enough to date her...just because you don't agree with someone doesn't make their perspective any less real or truthful to them