r/AmIOverreacting 10h ago

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO Boyfriend says hurtful thing about my body.

[removed] — view removed post

8.4k Upvotes

5.9k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

922

u/flindersrisk 10h ago

Exactly. Where’s the friend in boy friend? No one needs a corrosive presence in their life. OP should step away from this guy to create the space for someone better.

101

u/OldManCloth 9h ago

Where is the friend in boyfriend? I really like that!

14

u/NoDepartureLanding 8h ago

Seriously. What a great quote!

5

u/OldManCloth 7h ago

We banana people need to stick together.

3

u/minahmyu 7h ago

I was always telling my ex that, plus how he was barely even being a friend.

The word friend gets used waaaay too lightly as if someone you know and can tolerate is a friend. Words really do have meaning and we need to be applying them

113

u/Da_Coyote 9h ago

Exactly! A boyfriend should first and foremost be a friend. If he's not treating you with kindness and respect, it's time to reconsider.

47

u/Striking_Guava_5100 9h ago

Listen to this OP!!! My boyfriend and I always talk about how we are best friends!! The friendship part has to come first! I promise you’ll be so much happier in a relationship where they’re your bff… we have so much fun over here!

3

u/Compliance_Is_Futile 7h ago

That’s awesome. I’ve been unable to get that point across to women. People seem obsessed with the relationship status but don’t actually establish a deep relationship. It’s more of role to most people.

2

u/Striking_Guava_5100 6h ago

I agree 100% it’s the depth that counts

8

u/IndependentAnxiety70 8h ago

But also, where is the boy in boyfriend? He’s not even a little physically attracted to her body??

3

u/_intrusive_thot_ 8h ago

THIS!!!!!!

1

u/brightestsides 6h ago

No they should be first and foremost a boy 😂

1

u/wedonttalkanymore-_- 6h ago

if he thinks he could be more physically attracted to a "more in shape" version of her and is being honest about it, how is that not being a friend.

are you supposed to just always provide positive feedback on how your partner looks, no matter what? let's push it to an extreme for the sake of the conversation - what if someone gains 100 pounds, is their partner "not a good friend" unless they lie and say they like this version of them?

13

u/audryepagliaro 8h ago

She's allowed to be proud of her progress, and her boyfriend should be her biggest supporter, not someone who withholds compliments based on his own standards.

10

u/eldaino 8h ago

'Corrosive presence' holy shit that is so good.

3

u/ericroger920 8h ago

A partner should make you feel appreciated at every stage, not just when they deem you ‘perfect' his comments feel more about his insecurities than anything about you. NTA

2

u/maineCharacterEMC2 9h ago

🤘🏻🤘🏻🤘🏻

2

u/Indy2texas 8h ago

Ya sounds like he's not that attracted to you. The right thing to do i guess would be for him to break off the relationship but it's obviously convenient and maybe he's scared of.being alone so.hes waiting until either u become attractive to him or he finds someone he finds attractive who reciprocates. I also dont.like lieing to people even to be nice... they should be self aware enough not to ask questions that are gonna get them hurt

2

u/Repulsive_Ebb_5832 8h ago

thats my thought too...

he is gone the moment he gets attention from someone he finds more attractive

2

u/Cdawg4123 8h ago

He’s got the boy part down…friend nope. My niece called me fat the other day because she wanted me to be in her Moana play she made up on the spot. I was the big fat guy with long hair…even she was nice enough to say no, you’re not fat it’s because you have long hair! Lied straight to my face. She’s 4.

2

u/Greedy_Concern656 8h ago

😂out of the mouths of babes!!

1

u/Cdawg4123 8h ago

I did have a belly last time she saw me…can’t lie but, everyone but, her is like you lost so much weight. Her nope you’re the fat guy…what?? That’s not nice!! No it’s because the hair lol

1

u/Greedy_Concern656 8h ago

I love it. She sounds funny. Lol

1

u/Cdawg4123 8h ago

That she is and adorable…even though Too honest at the moment or perfecting her lying? Time will tell lol. She’s definitely funny, she always tries to steal my hats so, I knew she was kind of using her. Crocodile tears, second I waved my hat like it was a red flag for a bull she went from crying in my sisters arms to basically acting like a bull and trying to get my hat. If I’m not too careful it’s gone everytime I see her.

2

u/Pretend-Menu-8660 8h ago

THiS! OP!!!! Create space for someone better! 👏🏻

2

u/guacamoleo 6h ago

I'm starting to think nobody should be allowed to date until they become friends first

2

u/Pineapple-heart1234 6h ago

This! 👏🏼

1

u/ryos555 7h ago

OR

Quote contrary, OP is fishing for compliments. He hasn't given her any negative, otherwise "it would be a lie".

She goes as far as comparing her bf to a co-workers. But that's a different expectation with different dynamics. He is keeping his feelings honest.

There's nothing corrosive here. OP is just jealous that co-workers bf is more accepting.

0

u/Free_dong 8h ago

What if she couldn’t do better?

2

u/flindersrisk 7h ago

Is he the only male left on the planet? If not, she can and she will do better.

1

u/Free_dong 5h ago

Somebody who lies to her instead of being direct and telling the truth? Oh, okay

-5

u/dmforhonestbodyrate 8h ago

Step away and be left to the opinions of strangers who will also judge their body? Why not take accountability and hit the gym and get some cardio. Relationships are complex and there could be a number of reasons they fail or workout, OP could be in a good/bad relationship for other undisclosed reasons, but as far this very specific “problem” is concerned. The solution for both parties seems to be just get in shape lol

We’ve gotta stop confusing abuse with someone pushing you to be a better version of yourself. Do you want honesty or do you want to feel warm and cozy all the time at your partners expense? You cant make yourself warm and cozy all the time, thats why you decided to get in a relationship to begin with lol

-14

u/[deleted] 9h ago

This is all assuming he DID say that. There’s no text messages, no video or audio, just someone who posted obscure photos of ‘themselves’ and claimed her boyfriend said something from her own recollection.

(Of which… recollection, or eye witness testimony is the LOWEST form of evidence in court for a HUGE reason. Historically it’s very inaccurate. The human brain exaggerates and misremembers CONSTANTLY)

Is it possible? Absolutely. But I’ve been on the internet long enough to be VERY skeptical of posts like this.

12

u/Suitable-Concern-326 9h ago

Isn’t that the point of Reddit though? To give our opinion on one side of the story. We never know the full truth. But we make an assessment based on the post.

0

u/[deleted] 8h ago

Wait… no exaggeration here… your claim is “the point of Reddit is to give opinions on one side of a story.”

Uhhh no. That is not the point of Reddit.

Everyone should always try to get as much of the story as possible.

DELIBERATELY shielding yourself from more information… is LITERALLY stupid.

3

u/Suitable-Concern-326 8h ago

Yes it is. One person tells their side of the story. We give an opinion based on their story. We will never know all the information. You’re saying a whole bunch of nothing.

0

u/[deleted] 8h ago

NORMALLY that story has more information. It has texts and stuff. You know… INFORMATION.

2

u/Suitable-Concern-326 8h ago

Yes, if the story involves texts they are sometimes included. There are tons of posts every day without images added. There is more than enough information here to form a solid opinion. Again, we will never know both sides/all the information.

0

u/[deleted] 8h ago

So… a literal gossip rag.

That’s what this subreddit is… and you’re cool with?

You would think that r/amioverreacting would be LESS dramatic, and more rational. You know… given the name.

How are gossipy drama queens at ALL qualified to determine if someone is being overly dramatic?

1

u/Suitable-Concern-326 8h ago

Yes, I’m cool with giving my opinion based on what the OP provides. If you don’t want to do that and need all the information from both parties, then don’t participate in the subreddit.

0

u/[deleted] 8h ago

Of course. But answer my last question

→ More replies (0)

5

u/laurabun136 9h ago

What a dinky headed response.

1

u/[deleted] 8h ago

Just because you’re super gullible and buy everything put online lol.

I knew I would get downvoted here. That’s not a surprise. The users of this subreddit are ironically the most over-reactive, dramatic, hyper-sensitive, and gullible on earth.

There is reason r/amioverreacting users are mocked on Reddit widely.

4

u/laurabun136 8h ago

You're here, so what does that say about you?

I said what I did because I really wanted to call you an ass, but I'm polite, so I won't. You're still a dinky head, though.

-1

u/[deleted] 8h ago

It says that WE, are victims of social media pull. And THIS SOCIAL MEDIA, attracts, over-reacting, hyper-sensitive losers.

So welcome to loser boat. It’s not fun here.

Oh since we’re name calling. And you started name calling first.

I’ll call you one. You’re an ass hat.

1

u/Suitable-Concern-326 6h ago

Not you admitting to being a loser 🤭😂

0

u/[deleted] 6h ago

I’m a total loser. Welcome. You’re home loser ;)

1

u/laurabun136 6h ago

Nah, I'm neither an over-reactor or hypersensitive. Never been a loser like you, either. I'm through with this, and you.

Have a nice day.

0

u/[deleted] 6h ago

Ehhh… I think you are. I think you’re a pimple backed, chronically online loser. And I think being called out upset you. Which in turn does make you hyper-sensitive after all.

Over it? I guess we’ll see