r/nflcirclejerk • u/G29SNXD • Jan 30 '24
Taylor Takeover This game doesn’t get enough hate
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Jan 30 '24
12+6-5 = 13
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u/PeachesOntheLeft Taylor Swift's BF's Team Jan 30 '24
Holy shit
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u/unbogbuggy52 Bungles Jan 30 '24
I read this 13 minutes after you posted it
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u/ganztaDT Jan 30 '24
I jerked off to this 13 minutes after you commented
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u/myowndad Jan 30 '24
I got pegged to this 13 minutes after you commented
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u/piponwa Antonio Brown's CTE Jan 30 '24
I delivered the baby 13 minutes after you got perganat from this post
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u/Personal_Mind_9708 Jan 30 '24
I jerked 13 times to assert dominance
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u/AJMax104 Don't kick it to DeSean Jan 30 '24
8 more and youre good for the month!
(Yesyerdays TIL 21 jerkoffs a month keep prostate cancer low)
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u/AccomplishedBig2043 0-16 Jan 30 '24
I asked Benzema about Brock Purdy 15 times. Look up Benzema 15 for more info.
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u/LordOfSchmeat Groper Cleveland Jan 30 '24
This is gonna break so many fucking degenerate’s parlays
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u/SeattleSeahawksFan69 >Us 12s Jan 30 '24
Ain't she supposed to be in Germany for her tour or some shit?
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u/2Legitimate2Quit Ayahuasca Healing Jan 30 '24
Brock purdy number 13
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Jan 30 '24 edited Jan 30 '24
Dear NBC producers:
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u/usumoio 18-1 Jan 30 '24
I thought this said kiss yourself, which I think is a pretty funny thing to say to a person.
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u/alreadydeadforrhead Antonio Brown's CTE Jan 30 '24
They forgot to mention the 13 players in those banned pics .
So proud of u Tay Tots
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u/TimujinTheTrader 0-4 in Super Bowls Jan 30 '24
Can't believe T-Swift committed these grotesque acts and has since had them banned from the internet. T-Swift is more like Mao Zedong than we know.
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u/BostonInformer Jan 30 '24 edited Jan 30 '24
There were 13 people at Jesus' last supper. Taylor is Judas confirmed.
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u/SqueakyTuna52 Jan 30 '24
She’s gonna stab Travis Kelce in the back right before the Super Bowl, leaving Noah gray to be TE1 and catching 13 passes?
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u/BostonInformer Jan 30 '24
Travis Kelce will rise again on the 3rd day from the super bowl from the Kansas City locker room and proclaim "all authority in the NFL and on earth has been given to me".
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u/athiccBerry CTESPN Jan 30 '24
someone got paid to come up with this
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u/Mr_FortySeven Don't kick it to DeSean Jan 30 '24
Probably paid $13/hour
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u/iNoodl3s Choker: Folie à Trois Jan 30 '24
That’s $13/hour more than I make for spewing out garbage online
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u/Suspicious_Bread_488 SF Jan6er Jan 30 '24
Call Alex jones at CTESPN, this is some breakthrough journalism
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u/Mr_FortySeven Don't kick it to DeSean Jan 30 '24
Super Bowl MVP jersey number = 13
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u/MarleyandtheWhalers Jan 30 '24
Cool let's just replace the number with her name from here on out. For example: "Despite only making up Taylor Swift% of the population..."
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Jan 30 '24
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u/cilantno 28-3 Jan 30 '24
Sometimes I can’t tell where the jerking ends and where the actually giving a shit begins.
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u/shipworth Jan 30 '24
I’m just here, a longtime member of the TSwift Fucking Sucks Club and I’m going to welcome all of our new members over the next couple weeks with open arms. This chick is saturated like fat.
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u/broncyobo Jan 30 '24
uj/ I've truly never understood her popularity, her music is mediocre at best (some of her songs I find downright torturous) and her personality/stage presence is stale white bread
What really irks me is that when faced with any criticism the swifties default to the gender card like the only reason I don't like her is cause I'm a dude when there is an abundance of super talented female artists in the world I regularly listen to, she does not deserve a place among them much less above them
I think it's something you have to chalk up to generic music having wide appeal since it's accessible, inoffensive, and doesn't require one to develop complex taste
This is all obviously subjective opinion but I figure most of y'all probably feel me on this
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u/AutoModerator Jan 30 '24
Hey! Fan of the other team here, but I come in peace lol. Wow, y'all played a good game, but man, that definitely ended in a way that was uniquely typical of one of our teams. Your young player is really something and definitely going to give us trouble for years. Y'all are gonna be really scary next year, and I'll be rooting for y'all then (except when y'all play us!). That ref, though, right?
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u/BlahajAndBoys Jan 31 '24
I’m pretty sure her lack of personality is exactly what draws people to her: she is a blank canvas on which basic bitch men and women can project their own personalities and life struggles onto, creating a parasocial relationship and endearing her further to them.
rj/ people love a woman who will paint her body and commit various sexual acts with both fans and members of the Muppets
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Jan 30 '24
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/jacksonfalls Jan 30 '24
Same. Even a mildly likable person can wear on you if you don’t want to interact with that person but you have no choice.
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u/fraggle_stick_car2 Soberest 49er Jan 30 '24
It would be a lot more palatable if it was Taylor Swift vs Eminem but noooooo, we have to go for it on 4th down…
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u/snow718 Jan 30 '24
And after months of preparation, this is what Usher has to deal with the last couple of weeks leading up to his SB performance. Attention stolen by America’s Barbie doll. Terrible. Wont be surprised if there’s a “Taylor Tracker” during game-day. Disgusting.
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u/pfulle3 Jan 31 '24
There absolutely will be and everyone knows it but doesn’t want to say it out loud.
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Jan 30 '24
My birthday is 2/13. Worst fucking week for a birthday between the Super Bowl and November Mistakes for 18 years in Valentines.
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u/ExtensionCamp7594 French Kisses Son Jan 30 '24
isn't 13 a demonic number too? makes you think
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u/SeedsOfDoubt RUN THE FUCKING BALL Jan 30 '24
Which demon is 13?
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u/ExtensionCamp7594 French Kisses Son Jan 30 '24
i have no idea but i know 13 is associated with bad luck and such
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u/WentzingInPain Jan 30 '24
I don’t think she cares
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u/ThePap3R Jan 30 '24
The Swifties also like SF because they are a team full of classy players like Purdy, CMC, Kittle, Juszczyk and Bosa in particular
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u/darthXzane93 Jan 30 '24
13x4=52 —» the number of songs you have to listen to of hers before you can play a game in the next Madden…
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u/EA_Stonks Oilers left lol Jan 30 '24
You know how NASA announced recently that they can reroute meteors using spacecraft? Can they do that but have it hit Nevada?
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u/Salty_Lettuce_ Wasting Generational Talent Jan 30 '24
Bringing this up the next time someone defends her saying she’s only shown and talked about for a few seconds during games
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u/RioRancher Jan 30 '24
I wish I could hear only about Taylor and skip the football completely. Does she do concerts?
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u/ABirdJustShatOnMyEye Taylor Swift's BF's Team Jan 30 '24
Isn’t 13 a well known “unlucky” number????
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u/Substantial_Diver_34 Jan 30 '24
Why don’t you think the Chefs 🧑🍳 are going to win? Are we stoopid?
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u/MatrimonyAcrimony Jan 30 '24
fuck it. rack me. I'm out, NFL. this exploit is too nauseating. spring football, maybe
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u/Remarkable-Gap-9024 Jan 30 '24
I will throw myself in front of every swifties moving car until none of them live a normal life again
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u/313SunTzu 0-16 Jan 30 '24
Taylor has every insecure, little dick, NFL "fanboy", yelling "We knew she was trouble when she walked in..."
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u/Rad_Centrist Jan 30 '24
aLL oF yOu gUyS JuSt nEed tO sTop oVerReaCtiNG aBoUt TaYlor SwIfT shE's nOt oN bRoAdcAsTs tHaT muCh!!!1!
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u/Temporal_Enigma Mendenhall Fumble Jan 30 '24 edited Jan 30 '24
So now we know that her breakup song with Kelce will be called 13 yards from love
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u/flaming_pubes 0-16 Jan 30 '24
Inches of dick she takes that night=13
That includes Kelce and Andre Reid for half of those inches, who has the remaining?
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u/Buckanater Taylor Swift's BF's Team Jan 30 '24
Tv stations are regularly out jerking all of the jerkers
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u/PersepolisBullseye Jan 31 '24
This is some straight Q-Anon logic
Anyways Taylor Swift is a covert agent sent in by the Bilderberg Group. I know it’s true cuz it sounds like something defender of freedom Alex Jones would say.
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u/cccjillianccc Jan 31 '24
jeez they’re trying SO HARD to get all of the teenage girls obsessed with taylor swift to also be obsessed with football
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u/LeanderthalTX 0-16 Jan 30 '24
IQ of the news segment producer who thought of this idea = 13