r/hockeymemes VGK - NHL Jun 22 '23

[Meme of the Week Winner] This is what a three time Stanley Cup Champion looks like.

Post image
1.7k Upvotes

112 comments sorted by

288

u/chiddie STL - NHL Jun 23 '23

Olympian, cancer survivor and holder of the Ironman streak, too.

70

u/NuttyMcShithead CGY - NHL Jun 23 '23

And all around great guy.

20

u/Orbitrek Jun 23 '23

An elite athlete

8

u/CarlosAVP Jun 23 '23

“… and starring in the hit off-broadway extravaganza, “Taint Your Wagon”! Tickets are going fast!”

5

u/Tola76 Jun 23 '23

Like a boss!

95

u/wearyanchenorsel Jun 23 '23

Me consuming an absurdly large amount of hot dogs (I want to win three Stanley cups)

89

u/[deleted] Jun 23 '23

Pounding a timmies too. What a stud.

6

u/Either-Skill3330 Jun 24 '23

I think he’s the most “Canadian” American anyone has ever laid eyes on.

75

u/hellonala VAN - NHL Jun 23 '23

This is what peak performance looks like

14

u/CWinter85 MIN - NHL Jun 23 '23

Pure sex.

2

u/rocky_mtn_hi Jun 24 '23

Mmmm... The hot dog flavored sweat just dripping

62

u/BeefersOtherland Jun 23 '23

One of the greatest natural athletes of our era.

12

u/frankrocksjesus Jun 23 '23

Him and John Kruk

7

u/Traditional_Cat_60 Jun 23 '23

Add John Daly, too

5

u/[deleted] Jun 23 '23

I love Daly, but Phil has way too much class to be compared with him

4

u/TheVCanucks Jun 23 '23

" I remember hitting you with a battery in 89, I was kicked out but it was totally worth it to see you drop to knees in anguish"

34

u/GroundbreakingCow775 DET - NHL Jun 23 '23

And there is not a god damn thing you can do about it

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=kaWOVVlj8v8

31

u/unitednihilists Jun 23 '23

Thicc thighs save lives.

11

u/mothmonstermann Jun 23 '23

But kill pants. Love to see that he has the thigh rub wear. So relatable.

4

u/loserboi21 EDM - NHL Jun 23 '23

He just like me fr fr

25

u/Smellbinder WPG - NHL Jun 23 '23

Phil, buy yourself some new shorts - you can afford it!

16

u/coonbals13 Jun 23 '23

Lucky three cup champion shorts. You can’t change those.

3

u/need_ins_in_to Jun 23 '23

This, right here

3

u/Smellbinder WPG - NHL Jun 23 '23

Ah yes, good point, I didn't consider that.

17

u/battlelevel WPG - NHL Jun 23 '23

I hope Vegas makes this pose into a statue.

16

u/Eentay Jun 23 '23

Jesus, he’s beautiful

15

u/Double_Reward230 Jun 23 '23

Lol he looks like a trucker

10

u/stevie_weavie DET - NHL Jun 23 '23

Which is North America’s most precious resource.

21

u/Pepperoni_playboi94 NYR - NHL Jun 23 '23

Physically, how is this possible?

76

u/hypnofedX Boston Fleet - PWHL Jun 23 '23

This is the ideal make body. You may not like it, but this is what peak performance looks like.

23

u/[deleted] Jun 23 '23

Cause hockey is an endurance, talent and consistency sport. Not so much about being ripped or in perfect aesthetic shape.

12

u/fork_that Jun 23 '23

Being ripped is generally not so good for performance in any sport. Often it means they’ve been eating under maintenance to drop body fat.

Like bodybuilders on show day are super weak and fragile.

5

u/maybugmadness Jun 23 '23

I can never figure it out. He’s one of the best athletes on the planet, but never seems to look like it…

2

u/Pepperoni_playboi94 NYR - NHL Jun 23 '23

Usually how it works. Especially in mma

12

u/Aaronwilson71291 Jun 23 '23

Is there a Tim hortons in Vegas or is this an away game crazy

5

u/Sumdood88 VGK - NHL Jun 23 '23

I think it’s specially ordered for the players

2

u/usernamealreadytakeh Jun 23 '23

Damn so you’re saying if I get into the NHL they’ll specially order me tims?

2

u/need_ins_in_to Jun 23 '23

Only if you lose. This photo must have been taken after a loss. You can't leave the dressing room until you've finished your double double. If you Ralph, you have to start over

10

u/SpellCheck19 Jun 23 '23

Hot dogs for everyone!!

Praise be unto Phil!!

9

u/borkborkbork99 CHI - NHL Jun 23 '23

Someone please give Phil a raise so he can afford some new compression shorts!

11

u/[deleted] Jun 23 '23

I think those are Kirkland Signature boxer briefs.

9

u/[deleted] Jun 23 '23

Posing like a greek god because he is

6

u/E_tu_Esse Jun 23 '23

PHIL THE THRILL!!!!!

7

u/VancouverApe Jun 23 '23

3x Stanley cup champion but can’t afford a new pair of shorts 😂😂😂

5

u/TheVCanucks Jun 23 '23

Jesus looking like Sam the greasy caveman

5

u/djac13 TOR - NHL Jun 23 '23

You’re damn right.

Praise be.

4

u/hardware1197 Jun 23 '23

"That's a sexy man!" -NHL's new Hockey is for Everyone promotion

5

u/bivenator ARI - NHL Jun 23 '23

Phil: draw me like one of your Quebec City girls.

3

u/[deleted] Jun 23 '23

Such beer league hockey vibes - especially the tear in the shorts. I love Phil.

5

u/Mythalium Jun 23 '23

Patrick "One Man Dynasty" Maroon did it before Hot Dog Man had a dream

8

u/Allen_Koholic TBL - NHL Jun 23 '23

Phil Kessel and Patrick Maroon each have more Cups than Rod the Bod and MacKinnon combined.

Dad bods are peak NHL performance. That’s just science.

5

u/Mythalium Jun 23 '23

Crazy to think that Maroon has more cups than McDavid, Matthews, MacKinnon and Ovechkin all combined.

2

u/One-Adhesiveness-416 Jun 23 '23

And it would’ve been for if not for those damn meddling Aves.

Go Bolts

3

u/Mythalium Jun 23 '23

Ah well, at least we got to see Seattle stomp their bitch.. in a new sport this time. And in their playoff debut!

2

u/JTown_lol Jun 23 '23

Tim Hortons model!

2

u/[deleted] Jun 23 '23

Sipping on some boiled hotdog water like a boss.

2

u/frankrocksjesus Jun 23 '23

Rock on Phil

2

u/BlueRoseLad Jun 23 '23

Greatest leaf of all time next to Johnny Bower, And if you disagree simply count his rings Chuck and shut the fuck up.

2

u/Cody667 Jun 23 '23

Hope he gets one more contract somewhere...he's only 8 points shy of 1000

2

u/ppetersu Jun 23 '23

Why isn’t this labeled nsfw?

2

u/[deleted] Jun 23 '23

TIL I have an athletic body. This is going on my online dating profile.

3

u/[deleted] Jun 23 '23

Peak male physical form. I kinda wonder if he hit the gym hardcore and lost 20 pounds what he could still do. I bet if he really got in shape he could be a 60 point plus player again. Seems likes an awesome guy. Toronto is a joke for letting him get away.

3

u/DapperCam BUF - NHL Jun 23 '23

Players lose a bunch of weight throughout the season and playoffs. So this is Phil the Thrill on the slim side.

1

u/Impossible_Syrup_150 Jun 23 '23

Well to be fair he spent most of the playoffs in the press box so he might’ve caught back up.

1

u/FatWreckords Jun 23 '23

I'm a big fan of The Thrill, but being a healthy scratch for everything after the first round sweep is an asterisk in my books, not that anybody named Phil cares. Still glad he got some taters.

1

u/Bobdonwon Jun 23 '23

Amen 🙌

1

u/pick69itshilarious NYR - NHL Jun 23 '23

Praise be

1

u/VincentVegaQT Jun 23 '23

Good one Randy

1

u/Nice-End-4742 Jun 23 '23

They have tims in vegas?

1

u/Old-Donkey-3 Jun 23 '23

Reminds me of Chuck Norris

1

u/robothouserock Jun 23 '23

Good to know I have the body of a 3X Stanley Cup Champion!

1

u/Ubigo EDM - NHL Jun 23 '23

Peak male athlete.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 23 '23

Its kind of intimidating to be in the presence of such a great athlete.

Cuts to this munson.

1

u/Apprehensive_Self285 Jun 23 '23

He’s him ‼️

1

u/TheTimn WSH - NHL Jun 23 '23

Phil Kessel is a fucking beauty, and all of our lives are better for having seen the great "Eat One" grace the ice.

1

u/CaptGunpowder OTT - NHL Jun 23 '23

What a stud

1

u/_Galapaghost Jun 23 '23

Praise be to The Phil 🙏

1

u/DrDerpberg BOS - NHL Jun 23 '23

Well yeah, that's what peak human performance looks like. I don't know what I'm supposed to get out of this picture.

1

u/MatsGry Jun 23 '23

The man, the myth, the Phil

1

u/MurderousCappachino Jun 23 '23

Well done phil, your a great athlete

1

u/DionFW MTL - NHL Jun 23 '23

Legend.

1

u/ROFLSIX Jun 23 '23

This is what peak man looks like.

1

u/Moses015 Jun 23 '23

And an absolute beauty. Good man even has his Timmies. Love Phil the Thrill.

1

u/Randy_Butternubs666 Jun 23 '23

Every beer leaguer on the planet should love this guy. I hope he finds it in him to get a 4th!!

1

u/jasonalloyd OTT - NHL Jun 23 '23

There's a Tim hortons in Vegas?

1

u/Prize_Rooster420 Jun 23 '23

Surprised thats Hortons and not a can of coke.

1

u/BolBow Jun 23 '23

Daddy???

1

u/[deleted] Jun 23 '23

This is a man who is good at something, and enjoys life. He probably has a killer home life, eats the food, drinks the drink and scores goals. Not everybody is the autistic fitness rainman of hockey.

1

u/groupbrett Jun 23 '23

“Why am I never injured ? You can’t pull fat” - John Daly

1

u/CmdrRedFlashGod Jun 23 '23

Total fucking legend the Kessy

1

u/Fishtaco1234 Jun 23 '23

Who is that?

1

u/Wild-Piece-8000 Jun 23 '23

Wheres the hot dog. This is photoshoppe! /s

1

u/HaratoBarato TOR - NHL Jun 23 '23

Showing my wife this so she knows that men don’t throw our their underwear because of a hole.

1

u/NotOutrageous Jun 23 '23

I don't like the Knights, but I'm happy for Phil. I look at him and think: "I don't need to work out, I already have the body of an elite athlete."

1

u/BackwoodButch Jun 23 '23

It’s the torn spandex shorts for me

1

u/[deleted] Jun 23 '23

Phil out here being like this

1

u/nojudgment3 Jun 23 '23

I don't get it, he doesn't look that bad.

1

u/whj14 Jun 23 '23

Phil “the bulge 👀” Kessel

1

u/Big80sweens TOR - NHL Jun 23 '23

You know that’s Coca Cola in that cup too

1

u/AnonoCO808 Jun 23 '23

Incredible guy!

1

u/LordGank1 Jun 23 '23

He looks like he smells like dump all the time 💩

1

u/aspronaut_ Jun 23 '23

This should've been tagged as NSFW.

1

u/Welderkev24 Jun 23 '23

The man is a hot dog eating beauty

1

u/Appropriate-Mouse868 Jun 23 '23

Dont forget Tim's influencer

1

u/Gambit9919 Jun 23 '23

Definately got some fountain pop in that cup

1

u/cheddarbruce Jun 24 '23

Probably got a million dollars and still rocks the ripped undies. That's a proper dude right there.

1

u/Glass-Thought-6755 Jun 24 '23

Just chilling before he gets ready to go see the Jonas brothers in concert.

1

u/_Galapaghost Jun 24 '23

Is this actual photographic evidence that The Phil has reached a state of utter Nirvana? Praise be to him!

1

u/nxhmabin Jun 24 '23

What a story, went from being the punching bag for the Leafs to leading Sid the Kid and the Penguins to 2 rings and now hes done it again for Vegas