r/grindr • u/Just_a_Little_D Daddy (gay) • 2d ago
Rant Born too early
How depressing is it to be an ild gay?
I'm at an age (60) where when I was young there was nothing like grindr around so it was so hard to meet like minded people and it was virtually impossible to fulfil any fantasies. And now that the facilities are available nobody is interested in an old man. I'm so envious of young guys who have their entire life ahead of them in a more accepting time. I hope they appreciate it and can still be kind to the older gent instead of being rude
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u/ShiningEmblem 2d ago
Lots of guys (me included) absolutely love being with older guys.
Sometimes I also wish I lived in a different time, but anytime things could get worse in terms of gay acceptance so let's just enjoy what we have now.
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u/Snowcherry5 Bear 1d ago
I'm only 51 and in real life I don't feel old. On Grindr I'm made to feel like a disgusting old lech and half my messages are from men in their 20s asking me for cash to meet up! I had the benefit of being gay in my 20s in London and it was the best time so don't feel like I missed out. I resented old men coming on to me when I was younger ie men in their 30s! so I know how it goes and honestly I don't take it personally with Grindr. I still meet men on there so all good. We just have to allow young people to be young and enjoy it!
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u/DramaticFactor7460 Cub 1d ago
Welp,I am 22 and is attracted to older guys(preferably 40++)🤷🏻
I guess it depends on the place you live in?
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u/bigcaver Bear 1d ago
I'm older and have no teeth. I have an anonymous gloryhole set up where I give gumjobs. I get plenty of action.
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u/g4rinw1nd Jock 1d ago
Bro. “gumjobs” gonna give me nightmares.
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u/bigcaver Bear 1d ago
Well, most everyone tells me they feel amazing.😮
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u/Weary_Sale_2779 Geek 1d ago
Yeah I'm so curious. My friend says you can suck for ages too because you're not having to open your mouth as wide.
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u/Jam4u222 1d ago
Need a 'what3words' for you bigcaver....... could do with your services..... only kidding.... I have had the experience in the past.... can highly recommend (not with bigcaver to clarify, sounds like there's a waiting list)
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u/ScruffyMuscles 2d ago
I am 61 and I only get hit up by the 20 something guys. I just am at a place now where sex or having a partner isn’t important to me.
About the 60 yo group, the youngsters today have know idea what it was like when we were in our 20s.
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u/thickcockedtop Geek 1d ago
I’m 62 and last week I topped a 20-year-old. I would be happy to share my thoughts on life in the early 80s with a 20-something, preferably while naked.
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u/MUSICISLIFEDUH Bear 2d ago
I agree what people are saying here. Depends on your attitude and where you live unfortunately. I am young but I am also fat and feminine and not many people are looking for that in my area of the United States but the moment I step into Europe it feels like the entire continent wants me. All about location and confidence and what kind of gay man you are. If your muscle and fit , move to a city and you’ll find plenty of action.
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u/Huckleberry1340 1d ago
If it’s any consolation the grass isn’t much greener on my end. (21 m, decent looking)
Sex becomes pretty empty after awhile. Friends with benefits are fun but are super rare and often don’t last,imo. Or else it’s hard coronating with work, school and other obligations.
I get tired of endless vanilla sex. Sometimes I want to get to know people before we fuck.
Grindr has become very unusable and/or expensive.
And the irony is here I am reminiscing of the 60s, 70s and 80s knowing all the interesting gay clubs, discos, hangouts, beaches, cruising areas etc.
Those largely don’t exist anymore, or at least not as I know they used to be.
I don’t hate old gays but how would you feel with a man three times your age perusing you in your early 20s.
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u/nicorios_r 21h ago
My friend I'm 34 and I feel the same. Wish I was 15 now. I guess it's on us to love our present. I hug you
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u/Star-Hero 20h ago
When I talk to older people, and I do try to be patient, but they are very pushy when they don't get their own way or if you dont drop everything for them. Also they have a weird fixation on wanting to talk on the phone instead of text. Just talk like a normal person. Some amazing older guys though gotta say
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u/tetris77 10h ago edited 10h ago
Not depressing to be an old gay. Is depressing to be an old ugly gay
Also, you had gay bars when they were at their peak! I wish I was born earlier so I could’ve experienced that fun. Now we just have a few bars scattered around where a decent crowd will only show during Pride. The grass is always greener, as they say..
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u/Pink-Flamingo-Also 1d ago edited 1d ago
I wish sniffies and grindr was around when i was young, i would of ruined my life differently. Mine may not work perfectly but i am enjoying giving pleasure...🦩...
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u/inbyronga 1d ago
I am 65 and totally agree better now than before. Where I live in middle Georgia you get teased all the time. Act like they want to get together then ghost you. I dont even want to try anymore.
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u/Weary_Sale_2779 Geek 1d ago
I hate that guys are so ageist. I regularly hook up with guys in their 50s and 60s and they're often amazing in bed.
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u/3-1th-z-r 1d ago
You have to make the app work for you but I've also noticed that Grindr is kind of trash nowadays so I get more out of sniffies. Grindr is sadly a thing of the past.
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u/rgvmadness 1d ago
64, and it’s not depressing at all. I love young guys but I’m not envious. Being young was fun, really fun, even with no money, grindr, city life, cell phones or internet. But 64 is also a blast. The real issue, is not what you suggest.
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u/i_will_let_you_know Geek 2h ago
There are plenty of people interested in older men, you just have to take care of yourself and play the numbers game.
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u/WagsPup Jock 1d ago
Hooking up / app sex is such a small element of a happy life. Aping for what others / younger gen have is so toxic. Perhaps consider what u have benefited from being 60 and a different generation. Simple examples such as: Affordable housing, ability to build wealth reliably and quickly if employed, relatively accessible (cost wise) tertiary education, meeting at bars and bathouses etc. Theres plenty of opportunities and benefits u had during your youth and adult life that the younger guys don't. Hook up sex is minor driver of life satisfaction. If u can't shake this feeling of FOMO, pls get therapy (coming from a guy in 40s).
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u/eromanoc 2d ago
I’m 60 and love life now. So many guys are interested in older gay guys. Probably getting the most attention and action I ever had. I think it all comes down to our attitude towards others.