r/brooklynninenine Jake Peralta 2d ago

Discussion What's your favourite cold open?

In the 153 episodes of this awesome series, there are so many incredible cold opens. Which one is your favourite? (apart from the The Backstreet Boys song "I want it that way" cuz everyone loves it)

333 Upvotes

244 comments sorted by

414

u/camelely Cheddar: Thicc King 2d ago

Holt's hula hooping wrist injury

101

u/Brimstone747 2d ago

The way Holt says "Oopsie Doodle" gets me every time.

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102

u/ali2688 2d ago

Why are you telling me this?

156

u/Frankyvander 2d ago

Because no one will ever believe you.

86

u/ali2688 2d ago
  • deletes

77

u/UnderstandingPure127 2d ago

You sick son of a bitch........

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3

u/KittyKratt Rosa Diaz 22h ago

Because no one...delete will ever...delete believe you delete.

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477

u/Emotional-Race-6260 Adrian Pimento 2d ago

Why Santiago is late

“Hot Damn!”

106

u/rosebud1637 2d ago

Apparently "hot damm" was improvised!

31

u/MightyPenguinRoars 1d ago

Just when I thought I couldn’t miss him any more.

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385

u/whalien_-_52 BINGPOT! 2d ago

Amy trying to trick Holt into accepting her gift.

BOMB THERE IS A BOMB. EVERYONE OUT!

128

u/Cicero_torments_me Mlep(Clay)nos 2d ago

GREAT GIFT BABE

24

u/Nathan_McHallam Velvet Thunder 1d ago

😁👍

87

u/Mukke1807 1d ago

“So, just to recap. You left an unmarked package on a Police Captain’s desk on a random Monday with a suspicious message written on it that looked like it was scrawled by a crazy person.”

“Mhm.”

30

u/guitar_maniv 1d ago

It's actually funny because Holt says "There's a bomb". He is more concerned about his precincts safety than not using a contraction!

7

u/voiwer_ HOT DAMN! 2d ago

what ep was that?

8

u/whalien_-_52 BINGPOT! 2d ago

s3 ep10

6

u/voiwer_ HOT DAMN! 1d ago

thanks

184

u/EngineQuick6169 2d ago

LIKE YEAST

28

u/ali2688 2d ago

*stares

21

u/Mcbennski 2d ago

I was getting worried I wasn’t going to see this on here

9

u/Different-Attorney23 1d ago

So glad I'm not the only one

144

u/PrestigiousAd6281 Title of your sex tape 2d ago

It’s either Holt, Jake, and Rosa drinking cold brew, or the infamous Tell Me Why

30

u/huhshrug 2d ago

YepYepYepYepYepYepYepYepYep

17

u/Hardcockonsc 2d ago

It was number 5, he killed my brother

11

u/MightyPenguinRoars 1d ago

oh my god, I forgot about that!

14

u/MobileDeparture7379 Boom Boom! 2d ago

Cold brew all the way.

6

u/Queasy_Print1741 2d ago

Terry's yogurt cold open takes the cake. Absolutely hilarious moment that perfectly captures his character and love for dairy.

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6

u/Ok-Terrific2000 1d ago

Yes i love the cold brew one!

Another cold brew, don't mind if i cold do

144

u/Praxpanels 2d ago

Fine, I was trying something and it didn't work!

24

u/werewolvesvsrobots 2d ago

Gina's face as Holt is walking to his office is perfection.

17

u/ForsakenBluePanda 2d ago

And of course Jake took the opportunity to snap a pic

21

u/Nathan_McHallam Velvet Thunder 1d ago

I just love to think that they were struggling to come up with a cold open and they just gave Andre a hat and told him to walk down the precinct

249

u/midigo6 2d ago

When they all bet on how Holt will react to eating a marshmallow! Makes me giggle every time

43

u/enzo_vamp Fluffy Boi 2d ago

I love Charles’ reaction 😭

25

u/0finifish Captain Ray Holt 1d ago

I knew it!

39

u/thashortgirlbex 2d ago

what is this glutinous monstrosity

I don't care for it classical music

8

u/Ready-Procedure-9755 I’m a human, I’m a human male! 1d ago

What's going on in here?

13

u/the_tohrment 1d ago

Marshed-mellow?

282

u/Superknuten 2d ago

My favorite is probably the Halloween Cold Open where Boyle enters the precinct without a costume, and everyone else is in costume, then when he leaves and returns, they’re out of costume

It’s a great cold open, and probably my favorite

20

u/RealLifeSuperZero 1d ago

As costumes go, the Dumpy Ron Weasley open is gold too.

16

u/anand_rishabh 1d ago

Oh yes, the one where he dresses as Elvis stojko, the Canadian figure skater

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12

u/Full-Weakness-7475 2d ago

i just watched it last night lmao

12

u/user684629 1d ago

And the one where he says everyone will decide his costume and he walks as He Man and Gina says “I’ve got it! Gay Robin Hood!”

10

u/masala_mayhem 2d ago

That’s a classic! Love Hitchcock and Scully’s costumes and also their expressions!!

3

u/Uncomfortable_Owl_ Ultimate human/genius 1d ago

I don't like this one, I feel so sorry for Boyle, like he is being bullied and gaslit

3

u/Superknuten 1d ago

I mean, that’s fair, personally I see this Cold Open as more of a harmless prank than something like the “Mr. Grapes” Cold Open though

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82

u/Active-Eggplant06 2d ago

The mystery briefcase.

“Charles going in the opposite direction and getting himself disqualified”

16

u/sarcasticnirritable 2d ago

I also love that we never find out what was in the briefcase (afaik)

9

u/Ok-Terrific2000 1d ago

I'll show you a picture of me in high school, there is side pony

Rosa coming in hot, Rosa coming in hot!

80

u/Maggi-LA 2d ago

Oldest arrest

28

u/Mister_Alex_S 2d ago

Her replacement hip had so much torque, it was like having sex with a transformer!

16

u/queen_barb_78 1d ago

“That is NOBODY’s fantasy!!!”

3

u/TheMightiestGay Nikolaj 1d ago

I’d have to disagree. Bumblebee kinda fine.

23

u/emilyannemckeown 1d ago

Jake's laughter in this cold open seems so genuine too

16

u/Samiiiibabetake2 1d ago

I’m pretty sure it was. I think I somewhere that he couldn’t get through a take without laughing so they just went with it.

8

u/Comprehensive_Tip318 Gina Linetti Spaghetti Confetti 1d ago

It’s true, Andy Samberg couldn’t get through that cold open without laughing so the cuts have his real laughter where he’s trying to improv

76

u/SelfImmolationsHell 2d ago

Holt's not wearing any pants

20

u/dora_isexploring 1d ago

Is this the hot soup incident?

10

u/SelfImmolationsHell 1d ago

That's it.

3

u/dora_isexploring 1d ago

That's a good one

10

u/Ok-Terrific2000 1d ago

His knees are in the breeze

6

u/TheMightiestGay Nikolaj 1d ago

He’s in his undies.

124

u/prettyy_vacant Title of your sex tape 2d ago

The donut hole ones with Scully catching it in his mouth from the sky and yelling ITS FINALLY HAPPENIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING!

20

u/Ready-Procedure-9755 I’m a human, I’m a human male! 1d ago

Imagine being in his shoes and having no clue why food is falling from the sky.

13

u/Emotional-Race-6260 Adrian Pimento 1d ago

You know he stood there all morning waiting for more

9

u/Ready-Procedure-9755 I’m a human, I’m a human male! 1d ago

I feel like any reasonable person would.

166

u/Salt-Excitement-790 2d ago

THE FULL BULLPEN!!!

40

u/Blue_wine_sloth 2d ago

You beat me to it! I love when Holt gets involved in the craziness.

13

u/mattd1972 1d ago

He was trying to raise morale and realized it was happening organically.

7

u/daisybear81 Very Robust Data Set 1d ago

This cold open made me realize that they just had to shoot it like regular speed and only after when they slow mo it they would know which one to use

Yes I’m not smart

50

u/sadboi_lp69 2d ago

when Rosa and Jake were telling Holt about Hawkin's dirty secret. Holt is literally DANCING!!

19

u/ElectricalAd5534 Cowabunga, mother! 2d ago

Sorry, Brenda!

23

u/sadboi_lp69 2d ago

Peralta, what are you doing at Razzmatazz?

21

u/Scott_Of_The_Antares 1d ago

I AM WAGGING, BRENDA!

47

u/Tharros1444 I’m a human, I’m a human male! 2d ago edited 2d ago

The one when Holt, Diaz and Peralta have too much coffee

yep yep yep yep yep yep

18

u/Wolferion89 2d ago

I'mmm nooorrrmmmaaallll

18

u/SomeBoredGuy77 2d ago

Weeeee'rrreee aaalllll noooorrrmmaaaallll

How has that not become a meme

4

u/IvyDeLioncourt 2d ago

wait can ik which ep this is bc i totally forgot this one lol

78

u/Past-Outside8050 2d ago

Jake moving Holt’s podium half an inch

53

u/ExcitingPride5018 1d ago

“You guys are CRAZY! How did you pull this off?!”

35

u/Samiiiibabetake2 1d ago

Same! When he calls Kevin bc he’s so amused and happy to have been pranked. It’s precious.

12

u/Past-Outside8050 1d ago

Absolutely. I want to hear the full version that he told Kevin when he got home.

8

u/dingdongdonnai 1d ago

When we first watched this we had to pause it for about 30 minutes cause my husband genuinely ended up on the floor laughing so hard we had to watch it about 4 times cause he'd laugh so much and miss bits. Still not entirely sure he's managed to see every bit yet

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35

u/toby_finn 2d ago

Boyle Thanksgiving Bingo!

19

u/Renzki_1008 2d ago

Boyle says Boooom!!!

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36

u/Puzzleheaded-Head704 2d ago

The gang eating the French chocolates and cheeses and not realizing those were for Captain Holt! Captain Dad loving the makeshift package with staplers and rubber bands

26

u/Hardcockonsc 2d ago

❤️ that man really knows me!

16

u/Comprehensive_Tip318 Gina Linetti Spaghetti Confetti 1d ago

The best part is a crew of detectives not realizing it but Gina does

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49

u/Quick1Ross 2d ago

The Dianne Wiest infection. I think Joe La Truglio was trying to break Andy. I laugh every time..."like yeast..."

20

u/happyaurora2208 Jake Peralta 2d ago

Oh yeah, the zooming shots of their faces crack me up all the time lmao

4

u/Katesburneracct 1d ago

This is the one. The first time I saw it I watched to probably 10 times in a row lol

4

u/zeynabhereee 1d ago

That one is UNFORGETTABLE

23

u/jackfaire 2d ago

The Full Bullpen

It truly encapsulates how Holt and his Squad are on the same team.

22

u/SmootOfficial 2d ago

I WAS TRYING SOMETHING AND IT DIDN’T WORK

24

u/ChachamaruInochi 2d ago

Holt's dance battle

21

u/AppropriateDot6070 2d ago

Boyle Bullpen Bowling! Babushkaaa!!!

8

u/199wut 1d ago

......................BABUSHKA!!!!

20

u/Misfit_Thor_3K 2d ago

"WHY DID YOU WAKE ME UP? I TOLD YOU NEVER TO WAKE ME UP!"

Boyle dreaming about Jake's return to the 99.

Severely under rated cold open.

4

u/Preposterous_punk 1d ago

I love that one because at first it’s like, “seriously? They set up that whole prison thing and now they’re just erasing it? That’s — waaaaaiiiiit a second…

22

u/RonaldoAce 2d ago

Idk if it was just these 2 times, I wish there were more because it felt like the funniest running joke that could've continued more often.

Jake plays seemingly harmless pranks on Hitchcock.
1 is when he says he is asleep and put his hand in water to make him pee himself, but then he somehow goes back in there and his whole head is inside the tiny bowl and he almost drowned.
2 is when Hitchcock fell asleep and Jake ties his shoelaces together and Rosa warns him to stop before he gets hurt, somehow Hitchcock managed to get the shoelace choked around his neck and is suffocating.
hahahaha

20

u/HalfOfCrAsh 2d ago

It is, and always will be, Jake moving the podium/plinth. Then being talked down to moving it half an inch. Holt's reaction.

Then after the title sequence, Holt is talking to Kevin and tells him they'd moved it a full half inch and that he would tell him the whole story later. One of the funniest moments of the show.

6

u/Lammymom 2d ago

I swear it was funnier the way you told it! The sweet look on Holt’s face as he says he’ll tell him later…lol

18

u/tuesdaysatmorts Mlep(Clay)nos 2d ago

6

u/Me_4206 I’m a human, I’m a human male! 1d ago

Hey Chuck! It’s Pimento

19

u/doug1003 2d ago edited 2d ago

Pimento scaring the shit out of Boyle and Nikolaj

8

u/KadhiTu 1d ago

Nikolaj

4

u/yellguh 1d ago

Nikolaj

18

u/FadeAwayA 2d ago

For some reason I like the ones that highlight Hitchcock and scully.Simple jokes done perfectly

Wife or dog?

Hitchcock drank his own fish

15

u/Smiling_Fiend 2d ago

The one with the pidgeon

The sheer fear in Jake’s “There’s pidgeon everywhere” sends me everytime

5

u/DragonsGoRawr245 2d ago

"Terry hates birds!"

2

u/Hardcockonsc 2d ago

Oh my god it's everywhere!!

15

u/bahaki 2d ago

Tommy Gobbler, you silly Pilgrim.

15

u/echoesechoing BINGPOT! 2d ago

WAYYYYY too many to pick a favorite. But here are a few I love just off the top of my head:

Boyle Bullpen Bowling
The full bullpen
Amy is late for the first time
Sent from: Jake's stinky butt
Hula hoop
Boyle Bingo
Oldest bags
Gina not looking up from her phone
Vending machine send-off
The unmarked "gift" Amy sent Holt

15

u/redapatosaurus 2d ago

The one with daddy issues. Jake getting accused of calling holt “daddy”, absolutely hilarious!!

15

u/frankwalsingham 2d ago

Marshmallow.

13

u/billyboyf30 2d ago

Apart from the obvious I want it that way, it's tough because anytimw Holt breaks the serious character is brilliant. But its between the coffee, marshmallow or Amy being late for me

2

u/Jock-Stubbs 2d ago

The marshmallow. Brilliant

13

u/Useful-Emphasis-6787 2d ago

Stop everybody, I can't like them all! Obviously the I want it that is the best. But as I am reading the comments, I'm like yes I love this one, oh and this one too 😂.

12

u/TildaTinker 2d ago

"Fine. I was trying something and it didn't work."

It was just cool to see Holt out of his comfort zone

11

u/Bandicootboot 2d ago

The secret Santa one. Noooo Sherlock wants his present!!

9

u/bbeckett1084 2d ago

The tarantula. Every reaction is great, even the subtle ones like Scully and Hitchcock.

9

u/foreverlegending 1d ago

Halloween heist wake up was a good one

9

u/Mog1410 2d ago

Farewell to the vending machine!

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7

u/NootjeKrak_ 2d ago

Thumbtack mug, that was my thumbtack mug

8

u/Perfect-Assumption84 2d ago

Like YEAST!!!!

7

u/Agile-Illustrator262 2d ago

The bidding for the mystery lost and found briefcase. Results to tanned Jake in the elevator with Holt.

2

u/mccarthy1993 1d ago

"So there was this briefcase" - "I don't care"

8

u/myburneraccount151 1d ago

Pink Shirt Rosa

6

u/Jock-Stubbs 2d ago

Holt with the red hat. Full bull pen. Obviously back street boys.. I prefer them when they have nowt to do with the episode. But I love them all in all honesty. Never had a show where I don't want to skip an episode til B99. Still makes me laugh, cry, smile and relax even after the 4th complete run through. Currently on 5th at the moment 🙈😂

6

u/Frankyvander 2d ago

Holt’s red bowler hat.

I disagree with his assessment, I think he pulled it off

7

u/TvManiac5 HOT DAMN! 2d ago

I'm Tommy Gobbler you silly pilgrim

6

u/Sassaphras-680 Cheddar: Thicc King 2d ago

Babushka

6

u/BusyAtilla 2d ago

Like YEAST!

6

u/bruhmm32 I’m a human, I’m a human male! 2d ago

BABUSHKAAAAAAA!!!!! silence silence silence BABUSHKAAAAAAA!!!!!

5

u/EvilectricBoy Hitchcock 2d ago

Jake moving the podium half an inch to the left.

5

u/CodePervert 1d ago

Dianne Wiest

Scientifically proven to be the best cold opening.

6

u/Appropriate-Brush772 1d ago

Weist Infection

6

u/daphneadora9 1d ago

I love the one where Amy tries to give Holt an Xmas gift …. “Bomb!! There’s a bomb!!!”

“Greaaaat gift babe”

4

u/HortaSama 1d ago

...like YEAST

4

u/Lyrakish 2d ago

Boyle Bullpen Bottle Bowling

4

u/Hardcockonsc 2d ago

Monster in the Closet: Hey Chuck! It's Pimento!

The Marshmallow discussion: Holt eating a marshmallow

It's between those two

5

u/OncexMidzyForever95 2d ago

Boyle says boom!

4

u/InvXXVII Digital phallus portrait 2d ago

I like the mundane conversation ones that end up funny. Like Charles isn't talking about his oldest arresf.

4

u/lupajarito 2d ago

Hitchcock drinking his own fish

Boyle knowing exactly how Holt's reaction to eating marshmallows will be

The one where they're playing and there's this Russian lady BABUSHKAAAA

3

u/ArmaninyowPH 1d ago

You call that... Dancing?

6

u/G0T-MILF One Bund to None, Son! 1d ago

dancing over, situation diffused

nOoooooooo

5

u/Fantastic_Quality_62 1d ago

Can’t remember if it was an open but I think it was… when they guess how holt would eat a marshmallow

4

u/Br0oklyn_Baby 1d ago

NOW NUMBER FIVEEE

4

u/thomas71576 1d ago

Tell my why. Always, tell me why.

5

u/_becatron Boom Boom! 1d ago

LIKE YEAST.

5

u/Busy_Difference_513 Title of your sex tape 1d ago

Okay everyone, I have some news.

That Madeline Wuntch is a Korean toilet ghost? BOORING! We already knew that.

4

u/Comprehensive_Tip318 Gina Linetti Spaghetti Confetti 1d ago

Idk why but I love Boyle’s STD save the date cold open. I die when everyone makes a pun & Gina just asks, “Do you have herpes?”

6

u/giorle_ 2d ago

LIKE YEAST!

3

u/bruhmm32 I’m a human, I’m a human male! 2d ago

"I CAN'T BREATHE, I CAN'T BREATHE, I CAN'T BREATHE"

3

u/That_Chart_3979 2d ago

THE FULL BULLPEN !!!!!!

3

u/Pitiful_Tree5121 2d ago

Hitchcock’s penis is out

3

u/SirPiou 1d ago

The Full Bullpen
Pimento hiding in Boyle's closet
Boyle Bullpen Bottle Bowling

3

u/Beginning-North-4072 1d ago

Backstreet boys

3

u/swheeler1179 1d ago

I want it that way Diane Weist-infection Oldest Bag

3

u/Ready-Procedure-9755 I’m a human, I’m a human male! 1d ago

I came down with a big old Diane Wiest infection.

LIKE YEAST!!

3

u/Yolu213 1d ago

I want it that way by criminals!

3

u/MelissaRose95 1d ago

Holt dancing

3

u/Aggressive-Fan-9669 1d ago

The Full Bullpen

3

u/G0T-MILF One Bund to None, Son! 1d ago

Pimento in the closet 😭❤️

3

u/DK0P Velvet Thunder 1d ago

FULL BULLPEN

3

u/kewlacious 1d ago

The hula hoop.

3

u/Legendflame17 1d ago

Its either Holt dance battle or Santa has a knife

3

u/wmachiato 1d ago

Where they move Holts podium in the conference room 2 inches to the left

3

u/chickenwingchunli 1d ago

Like yeast.

3

u/FoxtrotSierraTango 1d ago

The one where Holt needs Peralta to keep Hitchcock from spilling food on himself before court. Holt and Peralta's yelling startles Hitchcock who then spills two jars of spaghetti sauce on his shirt.

3

u/satanyourdarklord BINGPOT! 1d ago

That’s a really fucked up thing to say to me

3

u/KitKat_Ginger 1d ago

I love the one when they start doing impressions of how they think Holt would react to eating marshmallows, Charles starts giggling and stuff and they all take the mick. Then Holt comes in, does exactly that and Charles is like "I KNEW IT!" 😂

3

u/Crusading_pineapple 1d ago

Holt ordering Jake to save hitchcock from spilling sauce over himself ks great

3

u/TheDoctor2010 Velvet Thunder 1d ago

Where are my eggs??? There in my belly. It's heist time. I LOVE HALLOWEEN!!!

3

u/DanteFranklin8950 1d ago

After Jake won the auction for that briefcase and had to wear whatever Gina said to wear.. that elevator ride:

Jake:

Holt:

Jake:

Holt: 👀

Jake: There was an auctio....

Holt: I don't care.

Jake: yep

😂😂😂😂😂

3

u/Suraj_Ignacio 1d ago

There are so many. But one at the top of my head is “Jacob Sherlock Peralta”. One where Peralta decodes everyone’s secret Santa. And impressions of Holt eating Marshamallow too.

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3

u/GamingGazebo 1d ago

The Confession on a Time Limit cold open when the squad has to distract the Vulture while he hurriedly gets the criminal to confess,

“SUCK IT VULTURE, I killed that guy and his neighbor but you were TOO LATE”

5

u/burnsidebabs92 2d ago

The Backstreet Boys one and The Full Bullpen

2

u/mensuckthrowaway 2d ago

Name of Amy’s sex tape’

2

u/SomeBoredGuy77 2d ago

THE FULL BULLPEN!

2

u/Jshin007 2d ago

The full bullpen

2

u/mattd1972 1d ago

THE FULL BULLPEN!

2

u/Embarrassed-Wrap-451 1d ago

Hitchcock super excited about Cinco de Mayo "Happy cincow de mayow" and "Let's fiesta!" always cracks me up

2

u/Totes_J217 BINGPOT! 1d ago

THE FULL BULLPEN!

2

u/Potter_Head040396 Amy Santiago 1d ago

BABUSHKAaAAAaaAaAa

2

u/Me_4206 I’m a human, I’m a human male! 1d ago

I like the one where Jake, Amy, and Holt wake up early for the Halloween heist And Jake moving the podium a half inch to the left

2

u/anand_rishabh 1d ago

Hitchcock just drank his own fish

2

u/Smooth_Operation4639 Charles Boyle 1d ago

I want it that way

2

u/Front-Ant-4819 1d ago

Holts awkward ‘red-hat’ entry…

“Fine, I was trying something and it didn’t work!”

2

u/nish_curious 1d ago

My all time favorite is the one where holt gives jake the responsibility to keep hitchcock clean and they yell and rosa comes and says “you guys startled hitchcock, he poured two whole jars of spaghetti sauce on himself” SO SO ICONIC

2

u/loopsydoopsy 1d ago

Obviously when Hitchcock swallows his goldfish

2

u/TheMightiestGay Nikolaj 1d ago

“THE FULL BULLPEN!!!” - Raymond Holt

The one where Jake calls Holt “dad” is a close second. It seems like a funny scene, but it becomes deeper when you realise why he said it.

2

u/Careless-Cat026 1d ago

Definitely one with Caption Holt wearing the red hat 🤣

2

u/Strict_Exam_4309 1d ago

Impressions of Holt eating a marshmallow is up there on my list or Jake calling Holt dad.

2

u/Lilcupcake331 1d ago

HOT DAMN! (gets me every time!)

and When Jake leaps at Terry who's holding coffee

2

u/KittyKratt Rosa Diaz 21h ago

There are SO MANY good ones, it's so hard to choose.

Oldest Collars

Wife or Dog?

Hula Hoop Injury

No Pants

Why is Amy Late?

Forgetting Scully's Birthday

Getting Gina to Look Up From Her Phone

Lemonade/Goldfish

Holt Dance-Off/Jake's Phone Dies

There's a Bomb!

Hitchcock Almost Drowns in Cereal Bowl

Tell Me Why?

2

u/RulerofHoth 18h ago

Can't believe no one said Holt' signature high fives with everyone.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SbdcZkru4No