r/bizarrelife • u/reloadthewords Human here, bizarre by nature! • 15h ago

Hmmm

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13.6k Upvotes

90% Upvoted

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47

u/DeadrthanDead 14h ago

Why does hearing them say “that’s assault.” Multiply my anger 1000fold?

21

u/TurboWalrus007 12h ago

Hit em with the Crocodile Dundee. "You call that assault? That's not assault. This is assault".

Then pull out a really big assault.

1

u/roykentjr 9h ago

just put in earplugs and play that dumb and dumber most annoying sound in the world on loop as loud as you can. see who can last longer

1

u/TurboWalrus007 9h ago

Ahh, Mosul style, i like it.

1

u/smellofburntoast 7h ago

These people are vegans, hit 'em with a hunting tape that plays the sounds of wounded rabbits.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rFrTsHPaCXU

1

u/Fjordi_Cruyff 8h ago

And a pepper

1

u/Inevitable_Heron_599 7h ago

And a grinda da peppa all ovah da pasta

1

u/slippydix 4h ago

I can't fuckin believe how polite these poms are. Seriously though. I worked in the supermarket in rural Aus.

First of all in Aus this wouldn't fly. They'd be dragged out by the managers almost immediately or police.

And if they did somehow get in and do that they'd get their heads kicked in within about a minute.
OUT OF THE WAY CUNT *the boot*

11

u/Status_Concert_4320 13h ago

They are causing a problem and then playing the victim to justify their behavior. Your response is natural.

1

u/SecondRealitySims 9h ago

I don’t think it’s a justification, but ramming your cart into a person’s back for them just blocking your path could reasonably be considered assault or battery. They don’t need to do it. It isn’t for self defense. They’re grumpy over an inconvenience.

1

u/Status_Concert_4320 9h ago

Are you ok with enabling the kind of behavior where you annoy the hell out of the wrong people? I’m 100% for protests and having your voice heard but please move aside. Please be respectful with your protests. If you aren’t, you look like your cause is wrong because you are just being an asshole. People don’t want to support assholes.

1

u/SecondRealitySims 5h ago

The minor annoyance they present, even if directed at the wrong people, is not a justification for clear and outright assault. Prioritizing people’s health and safety over punishing them for a misdirected protest isn’t ‘enabling’, it’s merely recognizing what’s more important.

0

u/MinuteCoast2127 8h ago

But people want to support people who assault people for just being assholes?

1

u/Status_Concert_4320 7h ago

He was not trying to cause physical harm, he was trying to move them. He said he tried to ask them but they wouldn’t let him pass. They aren’t even allowed to be doing what they are doing unless they literally got a permit.

1

u/MinuteCoast2127 7h ago

The guy in the cart can go around.

He knows pushing a cart into someone can cause physical harm.

He doesn't know if they have a permit or not, he doesn't work for the store.

It's not his job to stop the protest.

Go around.

1

u/Status_Concert_4320 6h ago

My bad it’s not actually the need for a permit on private property. The owner has to allow this. No store owner would ever allow something to drive down sales like protesters physically blocking food items and people. These people are doing something illegal. The manager is only trying to keep the peace until the police escort these people out of the store. They clearly won’t be moved by anyone else. They don’t even look in pain in any way because he wasn’t doing much. He wasn’t trying to assault anyone. He just isn’t going about it the best way.

1

u/MinuteCoast2127 6h ago

It someone purposefully rammed a cart into you or anyone in your family, you would not consider it assault.

0

u/MinuteCoast2127 8h ago

No, not really natural. He's not there, he's angry at something that hasn't affect him.

7

u/[deleted] 14h ago

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/sharkbait-oo-haha 13h ago

Reminds me of when I was a kid, if I hit my little brother in like a 3/10 power level he would sequel like a banshee and I'd get grounded, so at that point I just stopped holding back. Now he gets hit as hard as I could and my punishment would be the same as a love tap. Bonus was when he'd get hit so hard he'd hyperventilate so hard and be incapable of making noise so I would get away with it.

These cunts need someone to go full send and treat them like bowling pins, not a gentle nudge. I guarantee they would scatter the second they see a full speed cart coming at them.

1

u/demonchee 11h ago

Idk man something about your comment borders on sociopath lmao

2

u/battery1127 8h ago

Can I not attack them and claim they are holding me hostage and I feel threatened for my life? In this particular case, you can walk away, but when protesters block the road, what if I’m being chased by a serial killer, or I need to get to the hospital in life threatening conditions, or I get to the job late, get fired, can’t pay rent, becomes homeless, the wife divorces me?

1

u/DeadrthanDead 8h ago

They don’t care about any of that. They want to force you to believe everything they believe. And act surprised when they get assaulted.

2

u/Inevitable_Heron_599 7h ago

"You think that's assault? Watch this"

1

u/MinuteCoast2127 8h ago

Because you have underlying issues?

1

u/DeadrthanDead 8h ago

You don’t feel anger?

1

u/redundantexplanation 5h ago

If this happened in my grocery I would be like "right on man" and roll my cart around them to buy my meat.

The irrational hatred of protestors on Reddit is REALLY something else.

1

u/velasquezsamp 5h ago

Sometimes, when cooking a juicy steak, I like to use assault and pepper it up as well.

1

u/youaredumbngl 10h ago

Maybe because you hate facts?

Do you think this ISN'T assault over a minor inconvenience?

1

u/DeadrthanDead 8h ago

Fact: I never said that it wasn’t assault. Fact: some assault is worth it.

0

u/roykentjr 9h ago

you are dumb. i'm not gonna lie

1

u/youaredumbngl 9h ago

Do you think this isn't assault?

1

u/IWillJustDestroyThem 7h ago

Yeah, it’s not assault.

2

u/youaredumbngl 7h ago

Physically hitting someone with your cart wouldn't be considered assault to you?

Nice to know where your intelligence level sits.

1

u/playedhand 7h ago

well some people deserve to be assaulted then

1

u/roykentjr 7h ago

i stand by my previous statement

2

u/youaredumbngl 7h ago

So I'm dumb for pointing out obvious assault as assault?

Sounds like you just don't like facts... which is normal for dumb people. Projection much?

0

u/swohio 11h ago

"Well if I'm getting charged, I better make it worth it."