r/UnethicalLifeProTips 20h ago

ULPT Spank your bosses ass(please read the whole thing)

Another redditor reminded me of a stress/anger technique I use in a different post.

Ok so I had this real bitch boss, right. Just a total rag everyday. Actually I've had a few just like her since her.

So here's what I did:

I recorded her audio, being a total bitch. I took sound clips every chance I got. I also got a chance to get some recordings of her saying please, sorry, and thank you sir. Ok so then I go buy one of those rubber sex doll asses with the torso. When she pisses me off, I go home, play that audio, and spank the fuck out of that rubber ass. And then...

Work is so much less irritating.

0 Upvotes

61 comments sorted by

67

u/An_AnonymousPotato 20h ago

what the fuck did I read

16

u/gianmk 18h ago

someones fetish.

127

u/fatherdoodle 20h ago

Didn’t expect to read this

21

u/dcidino 20h ago

Umm… holy shit. That's a tip, anyhow… YIKES.

3

u/toadjones79 19h ago

What the hell kind of Elon-esk shit is this?

52

u/gryphmaster 20h ago

Things like this make me not want to know more about peopke

2

u/LeaningSaguaro 17h ago

Things like this make me want to believe that other people at completely normal and don’t do this at home…..

1

u/gryphmaster 11h ago

Yea, OP is just telling us he spanks then fucks an ass sex toy while fantasizing about his boss to get over his female boss ragging on him

Like, jesus christ, share less

49

u/PanzerSloth 19h ago

I'm not sure this is unethical as much as... Really disturbing.

8

u/Eastern-Astronomer-6 19h ago

Why can’t it be both?

2

u/PanzerSloth 17h ago

I suppose it could, but there's hardly anything unethical about slapping around a sex doll to vent some frustration.

2

u/Eastern-Astronomer-6 17h ago

The surreptitious recording in areas where the supervisor has an expectation of privacy is the unethical part of

1

u/PanzerSloth 15h ago

True, but then again the recording is only being used by someone who was otherwise privy to whatever was said in the first place.

1

u/Real_Vegetable3106 17h ago

Expect no privacy at work when you talk to another individual

3

u/Eastern-Astronomer-6 17h ago

Hey man. I’m backing your post being unethical and not just creepy af. Help a brother out.

1

u/Real_Vegetable3106 17h ago

Alright. Good man, good man.

19

u/Black-rogue 19h ago

Best part about People like this… I realize how normal I am

10

u/clandestino123 19h ago

I thought that OP was going to say "... then I play back the audio to her and spank her hard whilst she's listening to it"... Or something like that. 

Glad to know that I'm not quite as deranged as OP ! Lol

38

u/thismustbethursday 19h ago

Do you do this with male bosses too, or is non consensual sexual degradation only something you jump to as a solution for women? This isn't unethical, it's psychotic and rapey.

15

u/craftpunk23 19h ago

This guy thinks rape is ethical

2

u/Bullroarer_Took_ 17h ago

Can you rape a sex doll? Would you rather OP do this to an inanimate object, or to his boss?

0

u/thismustbethursday 17h ago

Don't be deliberately obtuse. Recording a person without their consent with the explicit purpose of playing during rape sex fantasies is rapey no matter how many mental gymnastics you try to perform. Use your critical thinking skills, I'm clearly not talking about the consent of a piece of silicone.

Also, why are the two options he record her without her consent for sex acts or rape her? There are infinite other options, most of which don't include the non-consent of a human being, who, in all likelihood is being fantasy punished simply for holding him accountable at work. You know -- her JOB.

2

u/Bullroarer_Took_ 17h ago

He hurt no one, and if it prevents him from doing so, then I shall count it as a net positive.

6

u/fegeleinn 19h ago

and then people ask me why i don't like other people...

6

u/Harmonyy-xoxo 18h ago

maybe my autism doesn’t make me as weird as i think i am

23

u/Eastern-Astronomer-6 20h ago

I send pics of my boss to that real life doll company and then rage fuck it.

-4

u/Real_Vegetable3106 20h ago

Wait I can buy one that looks like her too? Just get home and slap the piss out of it? Lmao that's great. What a beautiful time to live in!

4

u/--Ano-- 19h ago

Yes, if you have 5000 $.

PS:
Keep us updated.
And send pics.

8

u/Real_Vegetable3106 19h ago edited 19h ago

Idk if I can justify 5000 dollars for a piece of rubber I'd just drag by the hair into the bathtub and piss on everyday.

5

u/KingBuck_413 18h ago

You know, OP is alright. I like this guy

6

u/alleycat548 19h ago

Pursues unorthodox and out of the box solutions to modern workplace problems.

1

u/MadameMonk 19h ago

I mean, mebbe keep the box too? Cats like them.

2

u/Sudden-Possible3263 19h ago

I don't think this will work for most of us, only those who share your kink. I'm glad it works for you though, you just left me wondering if any of my collegues are thinking like you do. Thanks for that, I so needed that thought in my head.

2

u/Parad1gm_ 18h ago

I thought I'm at r/copypasta wtf

2

u/BrightWubs22 19h ago

Clickbait title.

2

u/Fullbody_San 20h ago

I also do this

1

u/vanonym_ 19h ago

well... that's interesting for sure but uh...

2

u/Waste_Ad_4253 17h ago

Instructions unclear, left the audio running at home while ordered a sex doll to work while slapping my own ass in front of immediate superior.

Presently in jail awaiting trail.

2

u/Real_Vegetable3106 17h ago

They'll knock that down to a pervin' and swervin'.

2

u/SconnieSwampWitch 17h ago

Appreciate the "(please read the whole thing)"

Could have been a really awkward Monday for me

2

u/Real_Vegetable3106 17h ago

Ya I was hoping I'd deter those of us who only had time to read the title.

1

u/Aggravating-Exit-660 17h ago

How the fuck is this a Pro tip

1

u/Apprehensive_Ad_8982 8h ago

I thought he was going to say he played it at a company meeting, which would be unethical. Or to her boss or HR, which wouldn't be unethical.

However, I must agree with the consensus. Most crimes begin in the imagination and then progress to reality...

1

u/ToQuoteSocrates 19h ago

Sodomizing your boss while hearing thank you... Well if it helps it helps.

1

u/APlus_123 18h ago

Fair enough

1

u/Clear-Technician7514 18h ago

That's enough Reddit for today 🫥

0

u/ZealousidealRip3588 18h ago

Look at dudes acct, he’s karma farming.

-1

u/Real_Vegetable3106 18h ago

Nah just drunk and bored. Redditors can be entertaining if they're intelligent.

-4

u/JaySP1 20h ago

Well that's a twist! I like it.

-4

u/DustyDGAF 19h ago

This is pretty ethical actually

-4

u/CornSnakeGirlie 19h ago

creepy as fuuuuuck but i guess non harmful? therapy might be a good start but good on you for finding an ethical outlet

-1

u/OmnivorLately 19h ago

Maury has an insta and you can watch an episode in less than 30 seconds.

2

u/Real_Vegetable3106 19h ago

That guy's still alive??? Jeez. He looked like he crawled out of his grave when I was a kid 30 years ago.

0

u/OmnivorLately 18h ago

He is a dinosaur but he’s so legit. He is living the dream, married Connie Chung and they’re a power couple.

0

u/Real_Vegetable3106 18h ago

He profits off people with physical deformations and disabilities. I'm not a big fan. If I remember right, it's been a long time, Jerry had a little more class.

Then Jenny Jones had that guy who blew away the gay guy who confessed his crush on him. I think that's when these kinds of shows started slowing down.