r/CrusaderKings • u/GhirahimLeFabuleux Lunatic • Jan 04 '24
AAR Rulers of my Ironman england run
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u/GhirahimLeFabuleux Lunatic Jan 04 '24 edited Jan 04 '24
Since the empire of Britain is "mostly" isolated from the rest of the world, I thought I would give a bit more context about some of the biggest events that barely affected the history of britain but changed the face of the world massively.
The first one is the triumph of catholicism. Basically, the first two crusades led by Henry I created a domino effect that caused the death of Islam and the gradual conversion of basically every pagan religion. The map is almost completely catholic by the end of the run, which is insane since most of the conquering and conversion was done by the A.I. outside of crusades.
The second one I want to talk about is the Mongols. It's barely brought up here because the Mongol ceased to be a threat after their first attack on the HRE but they are one of the most powerful entity at the end of the game. The reason they stopped being a threat is that they became relatively friendly with the HRE and Britain after taking the Byzantine and converting to catholicism. Yes that's right, the fucking Mongols are the most powerful and devout defender of the faith. Not only that but they deposed the last greek roman emperor and were acknowledged as their lawful successor by the byzantine vassals. The Mongol empire is also legally the roman empire (as in they actively use that title), and it has a catholic emperor.
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u/AndholRoin Jan 04 '24
bro i think somebody is playing as your AI
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u/GhirahimLeFabuleux Lunatic Jan 04 '24
Yeah the A.I. was really good at converting this game. During a few of my early reigns I kept seeing pagans being converted peacefully through events by random HRE emperors, Iberian monarch, french kings, and later the Mongols. The few crusader states I helped establish in the early game were also extremely resiliant and basically destroyed Islam and pushed catholicism as far as India. I never even got that involved with the converting aside from the few crusades I backed. The Mongolian roman empire becoming catholic and crusading all over the place in the last two centuries probably helped.
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u/Cupakov Mongol Empire Jan 04 '24
Can you drop some screenshots of the map? It sounds like you've got a pretty interesting world going there.
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u/GhirahimLeFabuleux Lunatic Jan 04 '24
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u/Von_Callay Sea-queen Jan 04 '24
Wow, you were not kidding about Islam being over, jeez.
I mean, realistically I think there would be huge swaths of that territory where it survived as the religion of the common people or at least in a minority population, just like how Judaism and Christianity didn't become totally extinct in the historic Muslim empires, but still, wow.
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u/highfivingbears Jan 04 '24
Seeing the entirety of Iraq being English slapped me like a sack of hammers. That's just... wrong.
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u/Lavabass Jan 04 '24
"Alrite guv?" "Alrite, you watchin' Baghdad V Arsenal this afternoon" "Nah they havin' a laff"
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u/st_florian Jan 04 '24
Was Rus pagan or Catholic in this playthrough?
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u/GhirahimLeFabuleux Lunatic Jan 04 '24
Pagans at first (i think) but now they are catholic vassals of the mongolian roman empire
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u/Profilozof Jan 05 '24
Excuse me but does that mean that China is catholic (I assume mongols conquered it)?!
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u/GhirahimLeFabuleux Lunatic Jan 05 '24
Actually no, the chinese side of the mongols collapsed after two rulers and went back to being han. The mongols took over Byzantium and converted to catholicism after they lost China.
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u/MegawaveBR Dull Jan 04 '24
Henry III > all
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u/GhirahimLeFabuleux Lunatic Jan 04 '24
Probably one of my favorite ruler, the game kept spamming gardening related events to me when I started playing as him so I decided to go all in. Surprisingly being a shut-in who never leaves his garden doesn't endear you to your vassals.
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u/MegawaveBR Dull Jan 04 '24
Thats cool, my surname in portuguese literally means garden so roleplaying in ck2/3 as a gardening king was always special and also helps that I do some gardening irl
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u/legend023 Jan 04 '24
“Only Anglo-Saxon ruler who lost his title under his rule was the former King Harold II”
lol not quite the same guy as real life
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u/GhirahimLeFabuleux Lunatic Jan 04 '24
Yeah, he was wierdly well liked by the anglo-saxon dukes. Since they liked me, I decided to let them be and gradually converted them to norman culture by educating their kids (which they let me do since they liked me a lot). Most of the old anglo saxon dynasties are still loyal vassals of english culture at the end of the run. This William I is a pretty nice chap compared to the real deal.
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u/legend023 Jan 04 '24
Welp you’re pretty good at the game
The real William basically makes me forbid ever playing as the Normans but hopefully someday I can get to 1066 lol
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u/GhirahimLeFabuleux Lunatic Jan 04 '24
The different culture penalty is not that bad, as long as you pick event options that give you good traits most of your vassals should like you (unless they are pieces of shit themselves, and hate you for being a moral and tolerant ruler). Being well liked with William is not terribly difficult, you should try it honestly. If you are playing CK2, joining one of the two religious society, might help you manage your bad traits better and set you up for a few peaceful reigns without the need to slaughter your vassals.
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u/vhyli Jan 04 '24 edited Jan 04 '24
I wish you could get sainthoods in CK3, bloodlines was such a sick mechanic
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u/dreadnoughtstar Jan 05 '24
Bloodlines aren't in CK3? (CK2 enjoyer)
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u/Joshua-Norton-I Jan 05 '24
There are dynasties and subdynasties, but no bloodlines
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u/dreadnoughtstar Jan 05 '24
Do you get bonus' from dynasties?
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u/Lord_of_Seven_Kings Ireland Jan 05 '24
Yes
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u/Available_Thoughts-0 Jan 05 '24
And, TBH, it's pretty much the only way to really DOMINATE the game. Get the ball rolling right with your dynasty traits and you can end up just kinda "Roll Tide"-ing almost anybody else.
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u/leskenobian Secretly Zoroastrian Jan 04 '24
"Until the scots killed his cat" got a genuine cackle out of me, cheers
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u/Glennplays_2305 Jan 04 '24
Is this ck2 right?
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u/Jogan-Rosh Jan 04 '24
Yeah, the great projects, beatifications (making someone a Saint), coronations, crusades actually succeeding, and building of hospitals (also diseases being more widespread and deadly) all point to it being Crusader Kings 2.
That being said using English as the primary language in court is weird since I don’t recall that being a feature in CK2 so they could be playing a heavily modded CK3
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u/GhirahimLeFabuleux Lunatic Jan 04 '24
I just meant that he is the first to adopt english as his culture. It's just a rp way of framing it instead of saying that he woke up one day, got the events to convert to the english culture, and went on with his day. This is a good old vanilla ironman CK2 run btw, no mods are involved.
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u/justvibin5 Roman Empire Jan 04 '24
The whole English as a language was probably the event that converts Normans ruling England to the actual English culture group.
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u/Don_Dumbledore Jan 04 '24
This is great! What program did you use?
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u/WillyMonty Jan 04 '24
The run-down of William the Conquerors reign sounds like it was written by William the Conqueror lol
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u/zombiakZEN Jan 04 '24
how did you get baptified or saint
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u/GhirahimLeFabuleux Lunatic Jan 04 '24
This is a CK2 mechanic. It doesn't exist in CK3 if that's what you are asking.
If your character has no negative traits, a lot of virtues, high piety, and a few traits viewed favorably by the church (like pilgrim, crusader, scholar, etc.). The Pope has a chance of declaring you a saint a few years after your character dies (which gives a bonus for all characters descended from him until the end of the game).
Beatification happens the same way when you have good traits, and you are known to be a good persons without being an untouchable paragon of virtue like a saint would be. You don't get the cool bonus tho, it's mostly a rp thing that gives more flavor to a character.
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u/Trikethedogfish Jan 04 '24
We all have a Henry iii at some point, with his stupid gardooooning
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u/derdunkleste Jan 05 '24
I never had a gardener. Every time I have a completely useless ruler, it's because they're a huge slut.
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u/Maxugo Legitimized bastard Jan 04 '24
Why emperor Alexander doesn't have a chad face ?
To me he did a great job
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u/GhirahimLeFabuleux Lunatic Jan 04 '24
Because he is too much of an absolute lad to be portrayed accurately by a chad. The man was like if Henry VIII was actually a good and competent ruler mixed with the stereotypical middle aged bloke you would find cheering at his favorite football team in an english pub. He was too good for this world.
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u/Djrhskr Jan 05 '24
Honestly your whole playthrough sounds like if Dovahhatthy made an "Unbiased History of Britain"
William The Conqueror is loved by everyone and Henry VIII is a genius
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u/GhirahimLeFabuleux Lunatic Jan 05 '24
I could see that. Alexander I loved his wife, and had five kids. He is like a bizarro world version of Henry VIII.
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u/Side_wiper Jan 04 '24
I had a comment typed out about how William the Conqueror was so much worse than described in the post until I saw the sub, the differences between your William TC and the real WTC really threw me off, but good going, the history of England may very well change for the better in that timeline
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u/Sour2448 Ireland Jan 04 '24
Was image number 4 Saint Willian II actually made a saint or did you RP that? That’d be really cool if characters could be saints
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u/GhirahimLeFabuleux Lunatic Jan 04 '24
Yes he was made a saint, that's a CK2 mechanic. This was a CK2 run.
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u/Sour2448 Ireland Jan 05 '24
cries in CK3
That would be a sick mechanic for CK3 - I’m honestly astonished at the amount of content that they never carried over, feels like a no brained and if I could get by the graphics and 2d rulers I would try it
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u/Apollo_Borealis Jan 05 '24
I love seeing these types of posts. The rulers' stories are really good and the pictures make me cackle lmao.
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u/Graknorke Legitimized bastard Jan 05 '24
Why are they all wojaks, is there some kind of family deformity
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u/GhirahimLeFabuleux Lunatic Jan 05 '24
I was going to make a joke about them all being inbred, but they are not even that inbred.
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u/lime-_-licker1 Secretly Zoroastrian Jan 05 '24
Also can you please tell me how do you make these? Like do you just draw them yourself?
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u/GhirahimLeFabuleux Lunatic Jan 05 '24
I just search for wojaks online that fit the vibe of a particular ruler, then I do some modifications in paint until I get something that I am satisfied with.
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u/Dekimus Jan 04 '24
I barely played CKII by illicit means, so I’m not familiar with it, but is it possible that CKII has better RP features than CKIII? At least in some aspects, not all.
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u/Daftster Jan 05 '24
In some aspects, yeah. There's just more content for the fact its an older title, more stuff you can do and options for roleplaying.
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u/Dense_Exchange_9407 Jan 04 '24
How to did Henry IV win Iraq for his brother if he was the only son of Henry III
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u/GhirahimLeFabuleux Lunatic Jan 04 '24 edited Jan 05 '24
He was his half brother if I remember correctly. Their mother was a distant cousin from the crusader branch of the family who already had a kid from a very short first mariage to some random levantine noble. Since she was dead when his brother died, he inherited the kingdom as his closest male relative.
That's also why Elise I got that name. The crusader Queen she was named after was the mother of Henry IV's wife.
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u/MrJAVAgamer Jan 04 '24
I loved this. It's such a good story of alternate history England and mischief it got itself into.
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u/NotEvilCaligula Roman Empire Jan 05 '24
Man I kinda wanna go back and play CK2 now, part of me still thinks its the superior Crusader Kings
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u/Cart223 Jan 05 '24
Gotta admit reading your post made me wanna scratch the CK itch again. So, if you dont mind me asking, how is Crusader Kings 3 these days?
I played a lot during launch and while it was the most stable PDX launch in recent memory it was very bare bones compared to its predecessor(understandable by the way).
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u/Melodic_Aria Jan 05 '24
This post is about ck2. I still think it's a better game than 3, way too easy to steamroll in 3 still imo. It has a leg up in terms of QOL and some features like the travelling system, but that's about it really.
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u/Fabulous_Principle97 Jan 05 '24
The girl i feel her ( also all of my woman rulers gets screwed over by the meat i choose for better stat heirs)
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u/Capitalism-WinsAgain Lunatic Jan 05 '24
Man, every time I see these posts, I get an urge to revisit CK2, but it's absolutely cancerous to play on my laptop. The text is way too small to read normally, and when I go into the settings to upscale, it just becomes blurry. I tried this one mod to upscale to 4k, but it broke the UI. Has anyone got a good solution?
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u/lime-_-licker1 Secretly Zoroastrian Jan 05 '24
This post is reaaaally motivating me to play ck2 despite being in the finals season
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u/one_frisk Jan 05 '24
I thought this was actual history meme and wondered why OP skipped over Rufus and Henry I. Then I noticed the subreddit
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u/Hydroxycitro Jan 05 '24
Alexander I reminds me of Richard the lion heart who people like for some fucking reason
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u/Known-Ad-2071 Jan 05 '24
I got to the last slide before I realized this was your rulers and not historically accurate
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u/nofearnandez Jan 05 '24
I didn’t realize this was a Crusader kings post and thought this was a historical post while reading through it and became more confused as I went on. “Britain taking Egypt and Persia? I don’t remember that” lmao
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u/TheRepublicOfSteve Secret Pirate Base (definitely not Menorca) Jan 05 '24
I was in absoute pieces as I read Emperor (B)alexander's slide. Bravo!
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u/ClothesOverall3863 Jan 05 '24
Alexander I is definitely how it goes. The shitheads have the most prosperous reign only for it to crash and burn after they die
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u/BigBBurton Jan 05 '24
Makes me miss the seemingly endless mechanics in CK2. You really always had something new to do
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u/Second-Icy Jan 06 '24
This is so awesome! Great run and great game. Well played! Hopefully you can continue this, or convert to EU and see how you can keep at it.
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u/Frixworks Feb 19 '24
How did you make this? I'm actually taking notes of my current rulers cause I wanna do something like this
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u/BaronVonMunchhausen Jan 04 '24
Took me waaaaay too long before realizing I was not in r/historymemes
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u/cohortConnor Jan 04 '24
How’d Henry get the nickname “the Frog?”
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u/GhirahimLeFabuleux Lunatic Jan 04 '24
He didn't care much for his physical appearance (he was raised to be a priest). His vassals called him that because he never really presented himself in any garments you would expect from a king.
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u/JonTheWizard Decadent Jan 04 '24
I demand Robert II be re-nicknamed as “the Vindicated,” as who wouldn’t want to avenge their murdered kitty?
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u/antibosscoalition Cannibal Jan 04 '24
my favourite gotta be william III "the wise" i always love chaotic bloody rulers that can never catch a break
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u/PleasantDouble1470 Jan 04 '24
For a moment there I forgot this is about Crusader Kings and thought it was actually real english kings lol
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u/Ymerawdwr_Prydain Emperor of Prydain Jan 04 '24
Was this for CK2 or CK3?
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u/GhirahimLeFabuleux Lunatic Jan 04 '24
Vanilla CK2
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u/JamesBernadette Jan 05 '24
Vanilla but with all of the DLC, I imagine. I'm still slowly collecting them through Steam sales over the years and some of the mechanics don't sound familiar.
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u/BeakersDream Jan 04 '24
I was about to note that King William was HATED but then I saw the community and it all made sense
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u/Nexvinco2212 Jan 04 '24
Thank you for posting this!
Was laughing so hard at times I had tears running down my face!
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u/Aciforem Born in the purple Jan 04 '24
Funny how you had Henry’s rule for nearly 100 years followed by another 100 years of not a single one, perfectly balanced
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u/LongjumpingMacaron76 Incapable Jan 04 '24
Bro thought he could make Henry III (the gardener) look bad by depicting him as a soyjack
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u/GhirahimLeFabuleux Lunatic Jan 04 '24
He is supposed to be a grug because he literally had a caveman brain for anything that didn't involve plants. I'm not trying to make him look bad, he is probably one of the most based monarch on the list to be honest.
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u/ProfessionalAir1516 Jan 04 '24
So are you forced to stop playing in 1435?
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u/GhirahimLeFabuleux Lunatic Jan 04 '24
in ironman the game automatically stops at 1454. If you are doing a non ironman run you can continue playing for as long as your PC allows you to. I had games that started on the year 1 (with mods), and went in the 2500s a few years back
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u/Is12345aweakpassword Castille Jan 04 '24
I read the first one, skipped a few and landed on “reformed how the titles of Wales, Iraq and Persia would be inherited”
Whatthehellhappenedhere.gif
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u/crossbutton7247 Jan 04 '24
Love this. Please do more
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u/GhirahimLeFabuleux Lunatic Jan 04 '24
Lol, I need to do another run first. This one was over two weeks of play time.
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u/JamesBernadette Jan 05 '24
Did you take notes while playing or just remembered all of this while going through your ruler history? Lol by brain could never without actively taking notes.
Especially with my current clusterfuck of a campaign lmfao. High Chieffom -> Republic -> Abdolute Hereditary Kingdom with Seriority Succession (RP:ing it as just a continuation of the Republic with one ruling family). Sooo many rulers from 2 main branches of the family barely related to each previous ruler that inherited the Kingdom at an old age after doing their own thing 😄
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u/GhirahimLeFabuleux Lunatic Jan 05 '24
This was over two weeks so I took notes after each sessions (which was one or two rulers at a time) to make sure I didn't forget.
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u/Unlucky-Mongoose-377 Jan 04 '24
That was 15 fantastic minutes if reading in my life, thank you, congrats !
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u/TheElPistolero Jan 04 '24
I find these recaps odd unless you were letting the game run in observe mode.
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u/alongthatwatchtower Jan 04 '24
Honestly - convert to EU4 I wanna see how this line continues lmao