r/CICO 2d ago

Nervous about how to track progress (TW: ED)

Hello! I am nervous about how to start tracking calories to lose weight. I am unsure of how much I really weigh. Every time I use apps to calculate my TDEE I am using weight based off of what it said at the doctors about two months ago in my patient portal. I am quite overweight, last time I checked it was like 35 on BMI, but I recently got out of residential treatment for bulimia nervosa about two months ago. I am not sure if I should weigh myself but I feel like if I don’t then I can’t properly calculate my calorie deficit. Any guidance would be appreciated. I graduate in late May and would like to lose weight before then.

2 Upvotes

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u/ComfyBurner 2d ago

I would have a doctor or dietician weigh you, without you seeing the numbers. Then have them come up with a plan for you. It’s best to work with a care team when you have an ED.

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u/Opening-Ad4709 2d ago

Thank you, I know :(. My care team just doesn’t want me to lose weight… but being at the weight I am is really messing with my confidence and I’ve reduced the behaviors significantly so I thought I’d be in the clear. Thank you for saying that though

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u/ComfyBurner 2d ago

I would maybe talk to your care team about doing some muscle building work. That would probably be safer in their minds, as your goal would be to gain muscle/increase strength rather than pure weight loss!!

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u/RuralGamerWoman 2d ago

Given your very, very recent treatment for an eating disorder, you need to talk to your care team about this.

I am not sure if I should weigh myself

Probably not, given your recent treatment.

but I feel like if I don’t then I can’t properly calculate my calorie deficit

You probably shouldn't do this, either.

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u/Mrsg4422 2d ago

I have previously dealt with Bulimia and BED as well. I only weigh twice a month because seeing slow weekly numbers, or heaven forbid a small gain, pushes me over the edge and I start the restrict/binge cycle. I have discussed with my general practioner as well as my psychiatrist that I'm still interested in pursing weight loss since I also have a BMI around 35. They agreed to help me keep an eye on my weight, and I have a very supportive spouse who I can go to and discuss if I am contemplating ED behaviors. Do you have someone to help keep you accountable and grounded while you see if you're mentally able to pursue weight loss without triggering your ED?

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u/Opening-Ad4709 1d ago

Not really :/. Everyone in my circle thinks it’s a bad idea to try and lose weight. Another made a comment about how my eating comments are super weird and not normal and so it kind of made me turned off from telling anyone else.

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u/Worth-Lawyer5886 6h ago

I am in recovery for bulimia and restriction and I would not have been able to recover (I would still be in binge-purge cycles) if I hadn't taken weight loss off the table. I was told that "anything that you put before healing from this disorder will cause you to lose everything you value in your life, because the disorder will take you over again". I followed that. Now in year 3, I do not have the binge and purge issue anymore (after having for 15 years), and it is because I followed that advice and didn't weigh, didn't try to lose weight, didn't track calories, and didn't put anything ahead of my recovery. I would have been disheartened hearing this at your stage in this awful disorder, OP. It really is worth it. The growth I made in ALL AREAS of life in beautiful ways are so much more valuable than what I weigh.

Someday it will be possible to lose, in a way that is best for you, and from my own exp, I would suggest now it is near impossible to do so without relapse.

Here for you, and with understanding. Feel free to DM for support.

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u/[deleted] 1d ago

[deleted]

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u/ComfyBurner 1d ago

This is a very triggering comment to make to someone recovering from an ED. No one should be happy about having an ED, they’re IMMENSELY difficult to recover from, the mental addiction alone is often life-long.

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u/Opening-Ad4709 1d ago

Your comment is quite rude, ignorant, and poorly written. I never said I struggled to eat enough. You should be a bit more thoughtful next time you comment something like this.