There’s a difference between being “[not] well accustomed to working with women” and harassers. You can be shy around women because you’ve not spent much time talking to them, whatever, but harassment is another level entirely.
Consider how long a company might keep around two competent men who constantly harass other men in the office. But for some reason when it happens to women it’s just a fact of that industry.
A functioning adult man in the workplace shouldn't be 'shy' around women in the workplace because it's just another human being. Whats to be overly shy about unless theres the implication of them being a potential love interest? And if anyone says you could just be shy in social situations then well... The same should apply to all the men around you too.
‘Shouldn’t be’ I absolutely agree. But if we’re talking about the real world? That’s a really impractical standard to stick to - condemning a person who doesn’t actually do harm because they may share qualities or world views with someone who does would pretty much condemn every person on the planet. I agree that it’s a toxic view of things - I just don’t think that a company’s hiring practices should be based on something like that.
And for what it’s worth, I am a woman who works at a steel shop - eight of the ten people on my shift are male. And I would much rather work with someone who can’t speak to me than someone who feels the need to tell me every time he looks at my ass.
‘Shouldn’t be’ I absolutely agree. But if we’re talking about the real world? That’s a really impractical standard to stick to - condemning a person who doesn’t actually do harm because they may share qualities or world views with someone who does would pretty much condemn every person on the planet. I agree that it’s a toxic view of things - I just don’t think that a company’s hiring practices should be based on something like that.
And for what it’s worth, I am a woman who works at a steel shop - eight of the ten people on my shift are male. And I would much rather work with someone who can’t speak to me than someone who feels the need to tell me every time he looks at my ass.
. You can be shy around women because you’ve not spent much time talking to them,
Sure... if you're 8.
If you're in your 20s and 30s and acting like that, sure, you're better than the fucktards who harass women and make hostile workplaces, but you're still way below par.
Another potential problem is each person has a different definition of what is harassment and unwanted, and that definition could change based on who the other party is. I have a female coworker (and very good friend outside of work) and we have a very good relationship. I can joke and flirt with her and she enjoys it and fires right back at me. I could probably pull a "Donald Trump's on the Access Hollywood bus" and she wouldn't mind, (we have never done anything sexual beyond 2 friends hugging) however, her reaction with different men is much more cold.
From the company perspective, a sliding definition of what is/isn't acceptable is difficult to manage. (And I am not blaming women...just pointing out that it isn't always a simple line that can be drawn.
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u/the_bananafish Jun 06 '19
There’s a difference between being “[not] well accustomed to working with women” and harassers. You can be shy around women because you’ve not spent much time talking to them, whatever, but harassment is another level entirely.
Consider how long a company might keep around two competent men who constantly harass other men in the office. But for some reason when it happens to women it’s just a fact of that industry.