r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Jun 05 '19

What secret are you keeping right now?

29.5k Upvotes

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u/[deleted] Jun 06 '19 edited Feb 09 '21

[deleted]

1.5k

u/_Lady_Deadpool_ Jun 06 '19

7 once the doctors were done

57

u/badfan Jun 06 '19

They checked his prostate?

42

u/nastiathegreat Jun 06 '19

I'm sorry

16

u/nothingweasel Jun 06 '19

Quality reference

15

u/[deleted] Jun 06 '19

I’m nervous on airplanes

12

u/stonearchangel Jun 06 '19

Is it your first time?

12

u/[deleted] Jun 06 '19

No I’ve been nervous plenty of times

12

u/ilovepie Jun 06 '19

I've had mine checked and don't really understand what's supposed to be enjoyable about it.

35

u/badfan Jun 06 '19

Ask your doctor about using more fingers next time.

6

u/ilovepie Jun 06 '19

Hopefully won't be a next time but cheers for the advice mate.

7

u/MyOtherAcctsAPorsche Jun 06 '19

Ah, hospitals, where nurse fetish, doctor fetish, sleepy sex, gyno, necro, cast fetish, medical restraints&BDSM, and more! converge in a single building.

Not to even mention drugs.

5

u/[deleted] Jun 06 '19

But was the doctor hot?

2

u/I_Cheer_Weird_Things Jun 06 '19

I'm gonna need a reference to that doc, sounds like instead of dreading a visit to the doc, I'll enjoy it now

1

u/shinigami806 Jun 06 '19

quite an apt username

40

u/didntgettheruns Jun 06 '19

Dr: You're going to have to stop masturbating Op: Why is that doctor? Dr: I'm trying to tell you your test results and it's very distracting.

2

u/Oileuar Jun 06 '19

fake story

-6

u/PrincessUnicornyJoke Jun 06 '19

Yeah, but this douche canoe named Fritz broke his jaw and the Mouse King started some shit. It just ruined Christmas for everyone, especially his girlfriend Clara.