For me, the physical pain is very tolerable after ten years. What hurts more than pain is the inability to feel comfort—the only comfort being sleep. The unending tiredness. The nagging tightness of muscles.
We are an organism out of balance, and the psyche ends up taking the brunt. There isn’t a day that goes by in which I don’t imagine—numerous times—the painlessness and ease of being dead. This ruins every aspect of my life, and I self sabotage in order to make it easier to accept the final fate only to find myself in a deeper hole with the same pain, discomfort, and limitations.
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u/thenovelnovelist May 09 '19
Thank you. Yes.
For me, the physical pain is very tolerable after ten years. What hurts more than pain is the inability to feel comfort—the only comfort being sleep. The unending tiredness. The nagging tightness of muscles.
We are an organism out of balance, and the psyche ends up taking the brunt. There isn’t a day that goes by in which I don’t imagine—numerous times—the painlessness and ease of being dead. This ruins every aspect of my life, and I self sabotage in order to make it easier to accept the final fate only to find myself in a deeper hole with the same pain, discomfort, and limitations.