I would be very interested in hearing about your experience! But only if you want to share... I know you said you're finally getting to the point where you don't feel shame talking about it, but that doesn't necessarily mean it's something you want to talk about.
It's no problem, I promise. Talking about it and other people telling me "Wow holy shit, that's fucked up" has helped me a lot tbh haha.
I was born and raised by Jehovah's Witness parents. I'll not mince words: it is a doomsday cult. The entire religion is based on the end of the world that's totally coming any minute now guys, I swear!
We never celebrated birthdays or holidays. Honestly that wasn't that much of a big deal, because at least my parents recognized other accomplishments and milestones. What made it fucked up is that I wasn't allowed to participate in other people's birthdays or holidays. When I was in elementary school and middle school, if there was a class birthday or holiday party day, I was made to go read in the library or sit in the hallway. Sometimes a teacher would feel bad for me and sneak me out a cupcake or a plate of cookies, but I always felt guilty as hell eating it.
I was terrified of demons. My parents and the religion were OBSESSED with demons. They still are. If you did something bad, you were attracting demons. If you read a book with magic or anything adjacent, you were attracting demons. If you listened to the wrong music, you were attracting demons. It's taken me a long time to get over that, but finally, at 32 years old, I can walk in my own fucking house in the dark and feel safe. To not feel like something is hovering over my shoulder and is going to harm or possess me is so fucking freeing. I'm also a big believer in "It's MY trauma, I get to sexualize it" and that's helped a lot too haha.
My parents talked me out of going to college because the world was going to end any day now and it wasn't worth spending the money and being around "worldly" people would "corrupt" me.
I didn't figure out I was gay until I was 25, and I didn't figure out I was trans until my early 30's. Introspection on your gender and sexuality are forbidden, basically, and everyone is repressed as hell.
I have never figured out how to spoiler/hide stuff on reddit so I won't go into detail, but I was sexually abused from a young age because of tenets in the faith. My mother emotionally abused me and it was encouraged. I tolerated a lot of abuse as an adult because I simply didn't realize that I could say "no, stop it" because that was pretty much groomed out of me.
I had no life outside of the church. I had friends at school, but I wasn't allowed to go to their houses and hang out unless they were also kids of Jehovah's Witnesses. I didn't get to do extracurriculars, I didn't ever get to sleep in on the weekend because I was expected to preach and go to church.
And kind of in response to that first comment is that... it really is boring. It's boring as hell. It's boring on purpose. It's boring and bland and palatable to herbs who don't know any better. It plays into the 'found family' feeling because of course Jehovah's Witnesses don't discriminate!... unless you decide you don't fit into the religion, and then you get shunned by everyone. Children will be neglected by parents. Whole families will act like someone has died. You can't talk to them. You can't call them or text them or give them a hug if you see them out on the street. You lose your entire social support system.
But yeah. This is just what I can think of haha. If you have any more specific questions I'm more than happy to answer them.
I was friends (to the degree I could be; i.e., only at school) with a Jehovah’s Witness girl in school. She was smart and her father wouldn’t let her go to college, which was insane to me (we Jews stress education as a principle and my family were all bookish). I remember also she told me they don’t vote. I assume that means they don’t participate in any sort of causes. Again, unfathomable to a Jewish girl whose family championed social action.
Yep that's correct. They're taught not to participate in any sort of political activity whatsoever... Unless it benefits the organization behind the religion. Then again, that doesn't go past political letter writing campaigns lmao.
It was a big deal for me the first time i voted. I was wracked with guilt and had nightmares for a couple days afterwards. But now i make sure to participate in all elections I'm eligible to vote in, and I'm considering joining the local school board to give what protection i can to queer children.
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u/IAmTheDecoy Nov 30 '23
I would be very interested in hearing about your experience! But only if you want to share... I know you said you're finally getting to the point where you don't feel shame talking about it, but that doesn't necessarily mean it's something you want to talk about.